The Weirdest Fight in Cartoon History
Disclaimer: Anything from "Fullmetal Alchemist" and "Kids Next Door" is not mine. Everything else is.
Author's note: If there was a "WTF?" category, this would be required by law to be in it. It's just the funniest fight that I've ever thought about.
Okay, then. To give this fanfic something resembling a story line, Gluttony and Lust of "Fullmetal Alchemist" get sucked into the most randomly placed dimensional rift and get spit out into the KND treehouse of Sector V just as Grandma Stuffum decides to attack the place. You probably see where this is going.
Once at the treehouse, the two homunculi saw Grandma Stuffum, and Gluttony instantly began to drool. "She has a whole bowl of something edible!" he said to Lust excitedly. When KND operatives 1-5 busted onto the scene, they stupidly stood IN FRONT of the massive homunculus and started rapidly firing ineffective weapons. Gluttony simply marched forward and trampled #'s 1-5, putting them out of commission for the rest of the story. (I never really liked them anyway.). As he walked forward, Grandma Stuffum started hurling food-based monsters at him. "Lust!" he yelled, "They look like all kinds of broccoli and meat and stuff! Can I eat them?" "Yes, Gluttony. Eat them all," Lust calmly responded from the sidelines. Gluttony then proceeded to empty the room of food twice as fast as Grandma Stuffum was producing it. "How can you eat this much!" She demanded (Finally! Stuffum gets a line!). "It's simple," replied Lust in that ever-calm tone of hers, "His entire purpose is to eat. You can't possibly win." "That cannot be!" screamed Grandma Stuffum, "He has to get full sometime! He has to! There's just no way!" By this time, Gluttony had completely made his way to Grandma Stuffum. He ripped the mixing bowl from her hands and proceeded to actually LOWER the volume of material inside it. While he was doing that, Ed and Scar came through the dimensional door. Ed clapped his hands and made a statue of himself that was twice as tall as he was so that people could actually see it without a microscope.
Ed says to the author: "Hey! Who-are-you-calling-so-small-one-of-Roy's-sparks-from-his-gloves-is-bigger-than-him!
Author to Ed: "Sorry Ed. It's just not FMA unless you get called small and freak out."
Ed to Author: "That's it! I'm gonna CENSORED CENSORED you up, pal!"
Ed attacks me. In my dodging him, I accidentally step on him. Oh well…
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes! Gluttony was emptying Grandma Stuffum's mixing bowl. Grandma Stuffum was trying to fight him for the bowl. Oh crap! Scar just imploded Lust! Gluttony finally finished emptying the bowl. He then ate Grandma Stuffum.
THE END!