Chapter 3

Ryan raced to the telephone when it rang. "Hello?" It was Erin. "I'm so sorry, Ryan. I tried to break it to her gently." He ran his hand over his buzz cut. "What happened?" He heard sniffling. "She took off. I told her you were alive, and she didn't even give me a chance to explain. She stood up and said 'What is wrong with you people? First Lily, and now you?' Then she took off. I couldn't catch her. Who's Lily?" Ryan sighed. "Lily is her sister. She's autistic. She saw me right before I left town, and assumed I was a ghost. Apparently she figured out that I wasn't one, and told Greenlee. Damn it. I wonder where she went." "Ryan, that's not all. Before I told her you were alive, I found out something major. I'm so sorry, honey. Greenlee miscarried the baby."

Ryan sat down on the bed. That was it. The votes were now in. He was officially the biggest piece of turd in the galaxy. Greenlee. He had wanted so badly not to hurt her. She'd already suffered enough at the hands of Jonathan. So what did he do? He told her he didn't want children. He spit on her dream by having a vasectomy. He blew up at her when she inseminated herself and got pregnant anyway. He faked his death so that he wouldn't have to deal with it. And now she's lost her baby, the gift that she tried to give him. The gift that he rejected before running away. If he was going to walk away he should have done it much sooner, like Jackson wanted. He thought he could hold on to her and hold in his anger. Greenlee, Greenlee.

Ryan became aware that Erin was still on the line, calling his name. "I'm here, Erin. I just…I just need to think about all this. I need to think about where Greenlee has gone, so I can talk to her." There was a pause. "Are you sure that's a good idea, Ryan? I mean, I don't think she believed me when I told her, so seeing you could still be quite a shock." Ryan sighed. "I think maybe she did believe you. Deep down. I need to find her, Erin. She's very good at dropping off the face of the earth. Literally."

Zach stared at the ceiling and wondered why he was dreaming about a little girl that looked like a combination of him and Kendall. Kendall wasn't having their baby. She was having Ryan's baby. Ryan. The man she loved so much that she did crazy things to try and get him back. And when she realized she was never getting him back, she tried to walk into the sea.

The trip to Bangkok was actually a blessing in disguise. His feelings for Kendall had grown, and his ability to smile and act supportive about the pregnancy had diminished. As much as he missed Kendall, he dreaded seeing her belly growing round with Ryan's child. Zach's eyes drooped closed as he tried to remember why he was still in Thailand. Something told him he should have been back home weeks ago. His weary brain tried to wrap itself around an answer, but sleep claimed him instead.

Zach heard the door to his room swing open. He looked over and saw one of his employees walk in. "How did you get the key to my room? This damn well better be important." The employee responded by swinging his leg back, and then bringing it forward into Zach's ribs.

Greenlee unlocked the door and pushed it, standing in one spot as the door swung inward. She walked into the flat that she had purchased for her and Leo. She had gotten thisclose to convincing Leo to move here to Paris. They never made it. Swallowing a lump, she went into the bedroom and sat down on the bed. She looked towards the window, the one where she once sat and dreamed big of a future with Leo.

"Oh Leo, please please give me some sign that Ryan is up there with you right now, playing a mean game of poker. Please tell me he isn't really alive and has been living as far away from me as he could get." She got up and looked out the window. "Tell me that the world has gone crazy and that Lily and Erin are being deliberately cruel. Please, oh please, Leo. I think right at this moment I want one of my babies back more than I want Ryan. He can't have done this. He can't have pretended that he died going over a cliff. Knowing that you suffered so similar a fate. He couldn't have wanted me to relive that horror again. Not my Ryan. He was messed up, he wasn't thinking clearly, but surely he couldn't have been that off the deep end…could he?"

She sank to the floor, going over and over in her mind those last terrible moments before he took off. Throwing the bookcase down, screaming "I am that monster!" He was fully convinced that he was a serious threat to her and their baby. He wanted to get away from them, get away so he couldn't hurt them. Greenlee brought her hands to her mouth. Could he have faked his death so that he would no longer be a danger to her? She shook her head. If that was the case, why couldn't he just tell her he wanted a divorce? Leave Pine Valley? Tell her he wanted nothing to do with her? She closed her eyes and leaned against the bed. Because she wouldn't have believed him. She wouldn't have given him a divorce. She wouldn't have let him leave. He knew she was just that stubborn. Stubborn enough to break into a fertility bank and steal sperm to make a baby. He had to go to such lengths to escape her good intentions. "Oh, Ryan. You really are alive, you son of a bitch."

Kendall settled into her seat. Tad sat down next to her, and groaned as he sank into the soft leather. "Oh yeah. This is going to be a much nicer flight than the last one to Bangkok." Kendall gave him a swift glance. "You've been to Bangkok before?" Tad nodded. "I didn't know it back then, but that trip was connected to this one. When you first came to see me, you wondered if I had any involvement with Julia's mission to find Noah's killer. Well, actually I have. I'd been a part of the investigation almost from the beginning. I can't really tell you much about it. The FBI has slapped a gag order on everyone involved. But there's one thing I can tell you, and you're not going to like it. Around about the time Zach went to Thailand, Di…um, someone with inside information stepped forward and told everything. The FBI used this knowledge to gather more evidence, and two weeks later they were able to bring the Dra….the, uh, top criminal to justice. So for almost three weeks now, this thing has been over. Julia's been in California since the arrest, living with Maria."

Kendall blinked at him, trying to process all this information. "I'm sure this had to have made the news. How could I have missed it? Wait, wait. Three weeks ago I was with mom in California. It was a mini-vacay for me and fact-finding trip for her show. I remember now, I came back and tried calling Zach to tell him about the trip. He never responded to my voice mail. I don't understand. Why didn't anyone call him and tell him that he could come home?" Tad shrugged. "He wasn't my problem. I figured he would hear the news. Frankly, when he didn't come back, I thought it was good riddance." Kendall narrowed her eyes. "Okay, when I didn't hear from Zach, I didn't worry too much because I thought he was in deep somewhere still investigating. But Julia would have noticed that he wasn't back, even though everything was wrapped up. Wouldn't she have wanted to try and find him to thank him for all his help?" Tad laughed. "What help? All he did was cause problems the whole time."

Kendall resisted the urge to slap him. "Excuse me, but he saved her sorry ass on a number of occasions. I should have known, Julia always was an ungrateful little bitch. But I'm surprised at Maria. If Julia's with her now, then Maria should have noticed that Zach wasn't back yet. She's the freaking love of his life. The reason he put himself in danger in the first place. Didn't she at least want to pick up the phone and spit out a thank you? What the hell is wrong with you people?" Kendall's voice had risen to a yell by this point. The flight attendant came over and smiled tightly. "If there's anything you need, just push the call button."

Tad looked at Kendall with pity. "Face it, Kendall. No one gives a damn about Zach Slater. Least of all, Maria. He's caused her and her family nothing but heartache. We'd all be happier if he just disappeared off the face of the earth. I'm sorry, Kendall, but I thought you hated him too. Its common knowledge that your marriage is a business arrangement. Who knew that you would fall in love with the guy?" Kendall jerked back. Love? No, no, no, she thought to herself. She cared for him. She had great sex with him. Hell, she was having his baby. But love? No way. She wasn't going to fall into that trap again. She would end up making herself and Zach miserable. No way. Having made up her mind on that score, Kendall turned and looked out the window. Oh Zach, please be alright. Please.