Rising

By Dimgwrthien

Disclaimer: I do not own anything pertaining to the Harry Potter series or affiliates. Please do not sue.

Remus found himself in the corner of a cell, able to see things after the darkness. A dull throbbing behind his eyes made up for it however, as the brightness pounded into his eyes that had only gotten used to darkness.

"Remus?" Tonks whispered, voice strangely hoarse. Remus glanced over at her and heard the door clink shut again. Her throat bled, turning a vivid purple from bruises.

Moving from his spot, Remus grabbed her, holding her close for a moment, she tried to clear her throat, though Remus saw her wince with every try.

"Are you alright?" he asked, leading her to the ground, sitting close to her so that their knees touched and rubbed. Fingering the injured throat, he winced from what he could imagine to pain to be.

She only nodded, unable to say anything more.

Remus led a finger down the side of her face, brushing away the drying tears, whispering, "We agreed that everything would be fine after this. It still will be. I promise. I'm going to get you out of here really soon -"

"What - you?" she asked, closing her eyes as she spoke as though trying to force the words out. "What - about… you?"

He just looked her in the eye. To get her out would involve staying himself, unless he could think of anything really brilliant. His sluggish mind, grown even more so from recent fights, weighed down his choices.

"You'll get out," he told her, staring at the ground. He could almost see his face in it from the reflection of the lights. "You will."

During the day, Remus felt Tonks' head fall against his shoulder, her breathing easing up though still wheezy, until she fell asleep. Later on, rough hands grabbed at him, shoving him roughly through the door. He saw Tonks being pulled next to him, mouthing desperate words at him, though no one could hear his rasping voice.

They rejoined later, in another room, darker this time, though still able to be seen easily. Close to reaching her hand, Remus heard several footsteps behind him.

"Well, Lupin's back!" came a cheerful voice. Remus glanced around over his shoulder to see Lyall standing over him. He grinned wolvishly. "Welcome back!"

Remus said nothing, but groped around his pockets for his wand, finding it gone. He had never been so close to the werewolves without a wand. Even when on his mission, he carried it with him, though he never used it. Without the wooden wand, he felt defensless.

"Hello," he said quietly. Lyall bent down, still smiling. Remus found it unnerving how his expression never seemed to change. The others, however, all seemed to glare at him.

"Heard you were a traitor," he told Remus in a loudly joyful voice. Remus winced very slightly, and caught Tonks' eye. She frowned, staring away from all of them. "What happened? Try to sneak in or something?"

"Nothing went on," Remus answered calmly. One of the werewolves made a 'tsk'ing sound, frowning in distaste.

He felt too used to the expression, and the fact that it came from one of them made him feel even more ashamed. There had been the days that had settled into the back of his mind, when Sirius thought he was a traitor. He had heard small parts of conversations from when James and Sirius supposed he would not see them or hear a word they said.

Sirius would give Remus a sideways glance, the corner of his mouth twitching downward. "You know he's collecting," he simply whispered to James. It sounded odd to Remus, but James' line made it obvious.

"He wouldn't. He's not like that. You've known him for years."

"I know," Sirius would sigh guiltily, "but everything's twisted now, and you have to be careful."

James only shook his head and mumbled something. Sirius, giving Remus another glance, made an odd sound of disapproval to James and frowned, looking away from his friends.

"Get up!" Lyall said, bringing Remus to his feet. His smile never wavered. Sharp teeth showed against the vivid red gums. "We don't bite! Well, we won't bite you, at least! Your friend, there, however…." He licked his lips, disturbingly as he stared at Tonks. "She's a pretty one. Don't put it past the boys to not try."

"If they lay a hand on her, I'll hunt them down," Remus growled.

Lyall rested a hand on his shoulder, his smile finally dropping from his face. Remus saw that he looked worn and tired behind the mask, as well as stressed. "If you don't let them, they'll rip you apart." Glancing over his shoulder quickly, he yelled at the gathered werewolves, "Get back to where you were! You're not in your right minds and forms to do much!" Lowering his voice, he said to Remus, "Come with me. The girl, too."

Remus felt the strong urge to resist and bring Tonks away, but he grabbed her hand and led her gently on. Lyall continued to eye her, though not with the expression Remus would have expected - he looked suspicious.

Once they reached a secluded area, he glanced around once more, sniffed the air, and whispered, "They're tough out there. I mean, they'll go after her in a heartbeat. Se's a pretty girl," he added when Remus stared him down again. "Just avoid them. I'm no one to worry about, of course!"

Tonks glanced at Remus, and Remus could see the angry red lines around her neck. He frowned.

"I'm fine," she whispered in a hoarse voice. Don't worry, Remus. I can handle a bit of time if these people."

"They're not what they seem to be," Remus whispered, glancing at Lyall. "I'm sorry," he told the werewolf in front of him. Lyall shrugged and moved away slightly.

"Alright!" Tonks whispered, eyes widening. "I'm - fine! I will - be - good!"

Remus stroked her hair lightly, staring at her. He would die before ever letting anything happen to her under his nose or anywhere else. He felt rather like a father to her after having known her for so many years.

"I love you," was all he whispered.

Then came a bright light before his eyes.

When Remus in the morning, he found blood near his head and felt a throbbing pain somewhere behind his eyes, throbbing like mad.

"Tonks?" he whispered through cracked lips, looking around for a moment. Before him, he found her again, eye wide and staring at him. He almost said another word to her before he noticed that she did not move in response.

"Tonks?" he repeated, reaching out a sore hand to grip her wrist. Nothing. No pulse, no movement.

In that one moment, when he saw her face, he realized her true beauty. It was true - death did create beauty. Beauty was the manifestation of death. Wide, grey eyes shone in the dim lights, looking almost pale blue. Her skin, whiter than he had ever seen it, cast light shadows that made her look rather mysterious. Her hair, converted to a rich black color, shone in the light, making the deepest shadows. He supposed she had really inherited the black hair, betraying her lies from the year before - brown had never been her hair color….

He let out a small sound, only a whisper because he could manage nothing more. If the sound had been magnified, it would have revealed the molecules of the human soul, from the love to the pain and every emotion in between. He realized that, in that moment, there was no such emotion as happiness. There was certainly lust, and there was certainly some amusement, but no one could ever feel happiness. Whether it was the pain of the end of his world crashing around his shoulders like an uneasy ocean, or just a realization, he did not know. All hew knew was that Tonks had died.

"I had told you," came a soft voice behind him, "that she would need more protection from them. The sad part is, you're going to need it, too."

Remus turned slowly, still facing the ground, and saw the bare and dirtied feet of Lyall. The bottoms of his trousers were ripped and torn beyond recognition at this point, and he sported a blackened eye.

"You'll be glad to know that she put up a good fight. However, I believe I got to the best of her with this." He raised a bit of wood in one hand that he had hidden behind his back. I looked rather like the part of an old shack. He beat it into one hand with the other. "I got her good in the end."

Struggling to his feet to grab Lyall - tear him - anything, Remus found that he could not move.

"I had to get you a bit as well," Lyall told him in an apologetic tone. "You would have managed to put up a good fight, too." He circled Remus, lightly touching an ankle, causing Remus to see swimming blackness before him again. He resisted the urge to scream out, knowing that Lyall would only find it amusing.

"I never meant to," Lyall told him, fingering Remus' ankles for a moment. Pain shot through his legs repeatedly with every swing. "I told you - it was for her own good. I didn't want the others to get at her." He moved away from Remus, picking up the bloodied corpse. Gently, he pushed at Tonks' eyes, letting the lids slide shut.

Remus felt as though the memory would be burned into his head for eternity. The slow sliding of dirty fingers over soft eyelids that he had memorized so long ago. The way her eyes twitched for a moment as though she were still alive. The final time he saw her.

Lyall had already moved the body out of the room before Remus' brain caught up with his eyes. The werewolf returned, staring Remus down as he sat cross-legged across from him.

"I broke your ankles," Lyall said unnecessarily.

"You did a good job," Remus muttered, trying to move without the use of his legs. No matter how he dragged himself, though, the feet dragged on the ground and shot more bouts of pain through him.

"They hurt, huh?" Lyall asked pressingly. Remus turned his head up and stared for a moment without answering.

"Well," Lyall continued, glancing off into space. "I remember when you were here before. Fenrir hated you, you know. I think it was your father he hated. You look a bit like him."

"So I've been told," Remus answered calmly, still trying to move. If he moved fast enough, he could ignore most of the pain, but Lyall grabbed his arm to stop him.

"You have the same eyes and hair. Chastity hates you, too. I think everyone does now."

"What a reassuring thought."

"Not really," Lyall mused, apparently unaware of Remus' sarcasm. "That Helen likes you, though. She keeps trying to stop me from coming in here. Thinks I hurt you every time I do."

"You do, though."

"True." Lyall's mouth started to open into a grin. "She wanted to come in here. Chastity said no. Do you want to know what they did?"

"No." Remus stared at the ground. He did not want to imagine what sort of horror they could have inflicted upon the young girl.

Ignoring Remus, he told him the story in detail. "She tried to get into here once he dragged in the girl you were with. Chastity just pulled her back at first, though Helen kept on trying to get through. Finally, Chastity pulled out her wand and just used one spell. Helen started panicking, I don't know why though. Finally, he just died after another spell. It was really sudden, like that." He clapped his hands together loudly.

"I see," Remus muttered, feeling rather ill.

"She told me to come and finish you off. It took me a while, though," Lyall told him. Remus felt the blood drain from his face.

"Then kill me now," he whispered. "You've already killed everything I've ever lived for."

Lyall smiled. "I may have. Except, I wasn't sure what she meant by finishing you off. Physically? I could kill you right now. I could leave you there for a while. You could just bleed to death if you want. You may not have noticed that." He pointed out something on Remus' head, and he felt, noticing the sticky blood on the side of his face. So it had been his own blood on the ground.

"It would be easy. You'll be dead in a day or so. Or else, I could always patch you up and leave you for another few days. You never liked the full moons. It's not too uncommon for the ones like you to die a bit after a few transformations. I'll never understand that about you."

"It's called a sophistication of the senses," Remus muttered, resting his head on the ground again. Pain beat through him, an he hoped for the end, anything, to stop it. "It's a pleasure I'm afraid you'll never understand, Lyall."

Lyall smirked slightly and rested on the ground, head touching the ground like Remus'.

"There's another way to end it for you. I could leave you here for a while. Seeing how you look, I think you would die soon. You liked her, didn't you?"

"She was my wife," he whispered back, glaring at Lyall.

Lyall shrugged. "Yeah, I know. I was only protecting her when I killed her."

"From what, then?" Remus yelled, his anger boiling over all other emotions.

"From the rest of them. I said it before - she's a pretty one. They would be after her and kill her when they got bored. Would you have preferred that? I'll keep it in mind for the next time."

"There will never be a next time," Remus answered.

"Because I have to kill you?" Lyall asked, smiling again. "You're funny."

"I'm sorry for giving you the wrong impression, then."

Letting out a small laugh, Lyall continued. "Just a bit longer in here and you'll find a way of killing yourself, I bet. I could leave you to that. People think I'm stupid because I'm a werewolf. They think you are, too."

Remus said nothing but closed his eyes.

"I'm not though. I know what you're feeling. Right now you want to kill me more than you've ever wanted to. That's part of why I broke your ankles. So that you wouldn't, really. After you kill me, you want to kill Chastity and all of them to suffer for what they've done. You're angry and you're lost. You know you're about to die. You don't want to drag out that time, though. You just want to end it now rather than later." Staring at Remus through clear blue eyes, he whispered, "I could do that for you, if you want."

"I wouldn't want to break your orders," Remus responded, looking away.

"It's wouldn't be. It would be helping so many people. Chastity in her orders. The Death Eaters because they could win. You because you want it."

"I don't want them to win."

"But they will anyway, Lupin," Lyall responded. "Did you know that you're their last hope. No one else from your side has bothered to do a damn thing. None of them are coming. Some of them are even glad you came, not because you're helping, but because you're going to die. It's not fair, one against all of us."

Remus stared at Lyall, trying to put his words in a proper order. "They won't win," he whispered hoarsely. His head started thumping with palpable heartbeats and he closed his eyes again. "I just risked everything I cared about to get here, lost some of them, and now I'm going to win."

"How then?" Lyall asked. "I'm curious."

Remus tried to raise an arm but found he couldn't. "I just have to use my last hope," he answered. "I think this should be fought out properly. Verbally or physically, whichever you prefer. Just as long as we're equal in it. As in, if it's physical, I get full use of my legs or a wand."

Lyall thought it over for a moment. "I think physical," he answered. "I may be good at thinking, but I was always better at fighting. I think I can remember how to use a wand long enough to fix that up." He left the room a moment later, not returning until he had Remus' wand in hand.

Remus told him the spell to use and Lyall used it calmly, making Remus' ankles tingle with the warmth of a healing spell that he had grown used to over the years. He stood up carefully, leaning against the nearest wall before walking on his own. "Thank you," was all he said.

Lyall raised his arms for a moment, then let them drop again. "How are we fighting this out?" He threw the wand to the far corner of the room, staring at Remus as he did so.

"To the death," Remus responded. In the back of his mind, he wanted to lose.

Suddenly, Lyall jumped out at him, grabbing his throat and twisting it so that, with another inch, Remus' spinal cord would break. Taking the opportunity of occupied hands, Remus took both of Lyall's arms and forced them down, bending them back behind his head.

Throwing out his neck, Lyall started to bite at Remus' shoulder, and Remus felt some skin rip off along with fabric from his clothes.

The fight lasted what seemed to be years. Remus tried his best to counter all of Lyall's moved silently while the heavy breathing of the man distracted him.

With a quick movement, Lyall punched out and Remus felt his nose break. He winced at the feeling, but clawed back on the man. Lyall tore at Remus' face once, bringing half of his skin off on his fingernails. He backed away suddenly, watching Remus.

Face bleeding, Remus sunk to the floor, gasping for breath. He felt the raw sting of air on his skinned face, hating it and himself.

"You said to the death," Lyall whispered. "I think that's close enough."

Remus glanced up, unable to blink without upsetting an eye. His vision seemed foggy and disturbed, though he could still see the tall outline of the other werewolf.

"I'll see you sometime soon," Lyall told him, leaving the room. The door almost shut before he caught it again. "Let me take this." He grabbed the wand and left this time, the echoing of the door lasting in Remus' ears.

Before long, Remus felt his eyes water. When he did blink, feeling pain like a needle through his eye, he opened them again to find that he could see next to nothing. Light and shadow blended and he had to fall against the floor to stop from vomiting. Blood bubbled past his lips, constraining his breathing.

He thought of Tonks for a moment and wondered what they did to her. Did she have to suffer so much? Remus hoped she had it quick and easy. It seemed like the happiest way for her to go. She could have the chance at happiness, Remus thought, rather than spend the rest of her life with an old werewolf.

He remembered the veil that Sirius had fallen through. He knew he was dying. It seemed amazing how the Ministry thought they could bottle up the aspect of death in that one room, through a darkened arch. Sometimes, at night, he thought about what would happen if the Ministry had been wrong about that, and the veil had only ever been a veil that moved people, not killed them. Sirius could have been standing next to him.

It seemed amazing how the Ministry bottled everything up. There was love in one room. Remus wondered what love looked like. Pink hearts? A ball of light? Nothing? He decided that love had to look like a woman with a heart-shaped face and a hundred different hairstyles, all looking strange but spectacular.

He thought of how love and the veil could be one combined. Maybe death was the road to love. Or love was the road to death. Remus could not figure out which was his fate.

And, with that final thought, Remus' eyes closed, letting him see only black for a moment before he saw nothing. Pure blackness, beyond any black he had ever seen. It was nothing.

No one in the world knew of his death except for Lyall and Chastity, who said nothing more on the matter. Their plan started to succeed, sending the Wizarding World into some of the worst turmoil it had ever seen. All the rest of the Wizarding World knew was there was another death - just another number to their statistic. And, no matter how much they searched, they could never find Remus John Lupin.

They say communication with the dead is possible. Others say it is possible.

In all truth, it never was. That's why people die. It's a way of saying goodbye forever, no matter what. There are no time limits to anything, no restrictions, it's just a way of leaving without a word.

People only care about the things they lose. That's true. No one ever realizes how much the man that always stood in the dark corner of the room, smiling but saying naught, meant to them until he's gone one day. It's as though he disappeared off the face of the earth.

That's something Remus learned through several of his friends - James, Lily, Sirius, Albus, Nymphadora….

Quiet exits were always the easiest.

Fin.