Author's Note: This is a bit of a joke that I wrote with the help of a friend. We thought that Faramir was skilled at different languages, and wondered just what languages he could speak.

Trying to think of as many as possible, and writing a story on each. Some languages will be from Lord of the Ring, some will not, but we will name them and where they come from. So Have no fear

This time we are using Norwegian, and the word in question comes from a song lyric.

Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Ring, I only borrow parts of it and shall return them as soon as I am done. Completely undamaged, as I am certain it will be impossible to see where we glued the pieces back together.

Norwegian Nonsense for Nobody

Aragorn looked up from his documents as two small Hobbits sneaked into his study. The older of the pair glanced over his shoulder before slipping in. That kind of sneaking usually meant they were up to some mischief. He was afraid it was some mischief he would have to deal with for he was loath to lay down the document he was working on.

There was already one document laying on the polished wood of the desk, and he was beginning to develop a theory about documents and his desk. It seemed that whenever he laid down two documents there at the same time, there were always three when he moved to pick them up again. He was beginning to suspect that the desk was a breeding ground for official documents, and he had no desire to get more of them. There was already more than enough, more than he could deal with.

He opened an empty desk drawer and dropped the document from his desk in it. Then he laid down the one in his hand on the desk. That would certainly keep them from multiplying.

"What are you two up to?" He demanded from the two Hobbits that were now standing in front of his desk.

"We want you to help us with something." Pippin said while trying to sound as innocent and cute as possible.

"I will not help you pilfer food from the kitchen." Aragorn stated and moved to pick up the document again as he now knew what they were up to, and wanted to get on with the work. There was two documents before him. Two, he was certain he had meant to drop one into that empty desk drawer on his left side. He assumed he had forgotten and rejoiced in the fact that there was still only two. The amount had not increased yet.

Taking one of them he dropped it into the drawer. A safety precaution against the fertile documents.

"We're not after food this time." Merry said hurriedly.

"We just need a wee favour." Pippin added.

"What kind of favour." Aragorn sighed and laid down the document again. " And when where the two of you not after food."

"Well, that's not to say we'd mind food." Pippin added. "T'would really be nice."

"But we want you to help us learn Norwegian." Merry added before Pippin could ruin it by talking of food.

"What is Norwegian?" Aragorn asked. He had never heard of it before.

"It is a language." Merry handed him a an old brittle book. "We found this in the library, we want to learn it but we need help."

"If you want to learn a language you should ask Faramir." Aragorn decided.

"We don't want him to know that we are learning it." Pippin gave him a pleading look.

"He always knows so much, we though we'd play just a wee trick on him." Merry explained. "Just a little about something he does not know. And that would be Norwegian. Will you please help us." He looked just as pleadingly as Pippin.

Aragorn pondered it for a moment. It seemed fairly harmless. It was not likely that Faramir would take offence. The best thing was that it would keep the two Hobbits occupied and out of trouble for some amount of time. If it started to get out of hand he could always put a stop to it.

"You swear it is only meant to be a harmless joke?" He demanded. "You will not conduct a kidnapping and leave a ransom note no one can read?"

Pippin shone up as if he had just gotten a great idea. Merry jammed his elbow into Pippin's side. "Just a harmless joke. We promise. We like Faramir, we just want to get back on him a little for all those weird languages."

Remembering a time or two when his Steward's language skills had taken him by surprise Aragorn agreed.

"I shall help you." He promised. "But I shall have to finish my work first. I can help you in the evenings after supper."

"Thank you." The Hobbits showed their affection by hugs that near choked Aragorn. Then they rushed out and left Aragorn to his work again.

However annoying Hobbits could be at times, he preferred them to the documents of state. He opened the desk drawer to take out the one document he had left there, and blinked. There were three documents there. He had been certain that the drawer had been empty. Could he have been mistaken?

It was a frightening thought that the desk really bred documents, so he supposed he had just missed the fact that there were already two documents in it when he opened it. Still the hairs at the back of his neck tingled with unease.

Whatever it was because his desk was really doing something strange, or because of the Hobbit's request he did not know.

Aragorn soon discovered that his charge was to decipher the learning methods in the book and charge the Hobbits to learn them. The book was actually written for the purpose of learning and so it was not a hard task. He merely told them what words to memorize, how the grammar worked, and then made sure they had gotten it correctly.

Now Merry and Pippin sat with a quill each and a stack of blank paper in front of them and practiced their spelling.

They were in Aragorn's private chambers to minimize the risk that the Steward would find them and discover what they were doing.

He would come to Aragorn's study a few times every day when he needed his signature and other things. Also some documents was for the King only and no one else was allowed to read them. Aragorn had found that those were very complicated, and by rule he had to seek out his Steward to explain them to him.

"Can you see if this is right?" Pippin handed him a paper where he had scribbled something.

Aragorn looked it over. "Mostly right." He said. "But you have spelt fölelse wrong. You have forgotten the two dots over the o."

"I've forgotten what that word means." Merry interrupted. "Can you remember it Pip."

"Feeling." Pippin looked at Aragorn while he spoke as if he was unsure whether it was right or not. Aragorn nodded. They were beginning to get a fairly good grip of the language. Their vocabulary was limited, but how much did they need anyway?

"When are you intending to play your trick anyway?" Aragorn asked slightly curious.

"Really soon. We're gonna write a paper and leave on his desk." Merry smiled. "We thought we'd make it look like a girl that liked him had written it."

"Take care to be nice." Since Faramir had Eowyn, Aragorn did not see how he would take offence by it. If it would somehow offend the younger man he would simply put all blame on the two Hobbits anyway.

"We just have to make it look like it was a woman who wrote it." Merry explained. "And we'll be nice. He should be happy if he thinks there's a girl who likes him. Shouldn't he?"

"As long as you do not put anything in it that could make Eowyn angry with him." Aragorn decided. "As for the handwriting. Why do you not ask Arwen to help you? She will not write it for you, but she could probably help you make your handwriting more flowing."

"Oh, that's a really good idea. We'll do that. Come on Pip." The two Hobbits took off to find Arwen and Aragorn shook his head at their undying enthusiasm. He had to admit that he would like to see Faramir's face when he read it.

Early one morning two Hobbits and a King sneaked into the study belonging to the King's Steward. One Hobbit placed a paper on the otherwise empty desk. They had agreed on a simple way to draw attention to it. On the paper lay a red rose culled from the Queen's garden. It certainly made it look as if it might have been left by a love-struck lady.

One other thing that supported that theory was all the young women in the City that moaned after the young man. Even if they knew he was courting the White Lady of Rohan.

Aragorn made a far better job at sneaking than the two Hobbits did. Having his experience from the Rangers to draw from. They hid in a chamber in the opposite end of the chamber. Leaving a small crack open, a crack just barely enough to peek out of.

When they heard the door open they all leaned forward to the crack and saw Faramir enter. He looked confused enough as he laid eyes on the paper, and they thought it would be even better when he realised he could not understand a single word.

Faramir took up the note and frowned as he studied it closer. "Your grammar is mostly correct." He said straight into the air as he studied it. "But you error slightly ever here and there, and your use of the words displaisebo is altogether wrong. No woman would use that as regarding to a man as it refers to two individuals sharing something that neither one can get on their own. Say for example a necklace that both wants but neither one can afford it on their own. If they bought it together and shared the use of it, then that would be displaisebo."

He picked up the rose and twirled it between his fingers. "I would also say for your sake that I hope you asked permission before picking the Queen's roses."

There came a gulp as one of the three in hiding realized that he had forgotten to do just that. Aragorn decided that since it had not worked it was time to come out of hiding. He pushed the door open.

"My Lord." Now Faramir looked surprised as he had not believed his King to be part of it.

"You are not going to tell Arwen, are you?" Aragorn asked pleadingly.

"I swore an oath to protect my King with my life if need be." Faramir had gathered his wits about him again and smiled as he saw the two Hobbits that followed the King out of their hiding spot. "I had not thought I would ever be protecting him from the Queen, and especially not to the 'give my life for part,' but I did swear to protect you. I shan't say aught." He promised.

He gestured to the paper. "Would you care to explain what this was all about now?" He transferred his gaze to the two Halflings.

"It's not fair." Pippin said sullenly. "We thought we had found a language that you did not know."

"And we went through an awful lot of trouble to learn it." Merry added.

"Then when we are gonna pull a trick on you by using it. And watch how confused you get when you don't understand any of it. And then you know it. That's awfully mean you know." Pippin fixed Faramir with a glare.

"I am sorry I ruined your fun for you." Faramir knelt so that he was level with the two Hobbits. "Shall I see if I can make it up to you?" He gave them a warm smile.

"Ye can't. Ye ruined all the fun." Pippin made a sour face. "An we spent all that time learning it."

"I think I can give you something to make it up to you, at least partly." Faramir soothed.

Aragorn hoped he could do that, for the Hobbits had been in so high spirit, and they really had worked really hard. It was a shame it had not worked out any better.

"I swore that oath to protect the King, and I gave my word I would not say anything. But you two could probably get a free meal for your word not to tell. I am sure that the Lord Aragorn would consider it a cheap price compared to Arwen finding out he has been in her roses."

Two pair of greedy Hobbit eyes darted of to the King. Judging as if wondering how much food they could get. A few seconds ago he had been grateful to Faramir, now he was not sure.

Still it had to be admitted that Faramir had turned the joke around rather nicely.

He help up his hands in defeat. "I give up, if I get a meal for you. Will you give me your word you will not tell Arwen."

"If there is pie." Pippin demanded.

"And ham, and salted pork." Merry added.

"And ale, don't forget the ale." Pippin grinned now. "And some honey cakes."

Aragorn nodded. "I take it I should ask them to send it here then." He headed for the door to send a servant for the requested food. "Why not, it allows me to escape my work for a little longer if naught else."

Faramir was not hard to convince that he should join in the feast. Not after he caught sight of the honey cakes. Aragorn hurriedly secured a few for himself. Merry and Pippin doing the same. Honey cakes was an endangered delicacy whenever Faramir was near them. It was one of the few things that was almost always guaranteed to win over his natural shyness.

Once all the plates was empty Aragorn left for his study.

Merry and Pippin had chosen to stay behind with Faramir, trying to figure out some odd language that he did not know.

Aragorn chuckled as he came to his study. If nothing else it had been very pleasant. The food and the company had been good, and a welcome distraction from his work. Speaking about work. He eyed his desk suspiciously. He was certain the desks surface had been near clean of papers when he left the room. So why where there a big stack of papers on it. No one entered the room when he was not there.

Since it would not be dignified for the King to be seen crawling around on hands and knees around his desk, trying to figure out it's secrets. As he could not understand how the wooden chunk was able to serve as a breeding ground, I have decided to leave off here.

Fear not for this is mere a temporarily necessity until I can post next, and fear not for the desk shall make itself known again.

Until then, may the temporality of all this see you well.

Lindahoyland: I rather thought that the book would be a touch of comedy when I put it in the tale. Yet for the record, I have worked as a librarian, I know how evil books can be when you try to get them in order. It is also always just as nice to get a hint of what you are doing, it makes me start thinking.

orli's-no.1-girl: I am glad you find our languages amusing. I have to admit that I do not know every language we are using, but we do not use translators. I have always been interested in languages, and I think the same can be said for Celebrion too, so we have just picked up bits of weird languages here and there, and we use them. Also we have gotten a lot of useful things from our readers. As for the vote, we thank you for it, we are most grateful in fact, and I also added the vote for John Noble.

Silver Sniper: Considering that me and Celebrion tends to get confused about such things as what day it is, or what week it is, not to mention month, and by the way, if you could tell me what year it is I would be grateful as I have no clue. Anyways, I am glad you like the way we twist the words around, why not twist something around if it means you need not write it in a straight line. I also hope that your Valentines day was pleasant. Happy Valentine, (if it is late I shall just claim to be early for the next year,) and your review is a great Valentines treat.

frodo16424: Glad you licked it, and as I said above, I have run into books that act like that, they are evil, but they keep you in shape. Glad that you liked the Swahili, and we always like a good challenge.

Horsiegurl: We are very happy that you liked it, unfortunately the next few chapters are already written, but we shall try to let it re appear again sometime.

Legolas's Girl 9:I agree, the Lion King is a good movie. We have Southtron planned, but are not there yet. It is mostly the Rohiric that is Anglo-Saxon, and there is a very large possibility that we shall attempt something with that. We have already explored it in the beginning of this tale, so we might dig deeper into that.

Lebennin: Thank you very much, we are truly very grateful. Both for the kind words and for the vote, we are now one step closer to achieving our goal, and it is a noble thing we struggle for, my friend. Your contribution is much appreciated, and we shall do our best as we continue with our tale.

Here I would like to thank everyone who reads my works, thank you.

Here it must also be said that in the tale "A Two Colour Chain Mail," we started the vote based on the fact that Sean Bean and David Wenham made the perfect image of two brothers. We also got plenty of agreement on that.

So here it is, if you agree with us and think that they should be real brothers. Say so in your review. It shall be your vote. On my authors page, in the bio I shall keep score. When the score reaches 100, they shall be declared official brothers. Then on my authors page shall be an official declaration written by Elenhin and Celebrion.

Then the truth can not be denied, they shall be brothers.

/Elenhin