Amphibian Girl

Chapter II

We are now continuing the Amphibian Girl series after many months of preparing and mostly thinking. I know it took me a while to update but I'm not the best at updates or editing.

No offence to Orlando Bloom, I love him to but he likes dramatic stuff so I just had 2 stick him in there!

To Britney Spears...really I could have done 10 million trillion times worse to you but Sasuke was begging for the part. How can you deny a freaky fish some crap music?

We left off at Sakura preparing to beat the living hell (literally) out of Sasuke a.k.a. Amphibian Girl.

Sakura and Sasuke are now in a stand off

Sasuke: Let's see if you can last more then a minute fighting against my great power.

Sakura: You have to be a NATRUALLY born female to be able to beat another girl that fast.

Sasuke: Who said females was superior when clearly the male structure is much more fit for fighting. You are here for cleaning that damn floor in the house your husband owns...(laughs)

Sakura: WHAT...? (Ground begins to shake violently as Sasuke continues to laugh)

Sasuke: (Webbed feet begin flapping preparing for battle)

Sakura: (Runs towards Sasuke with her fist out prepared for a hard hit.)

Sasuke: (Prepares to block but Sakura suddenly appears behind him.)

Sasuke: Huh

Sakura:( WACK-A-MOLIE HES FLYING!)

Naruto Ducks can fly?

Rock Lee: Well they do have wings...

Naruto: (Spit up all his animal crackers which oddly consisted of foxes and ducks) Lee? What the hell are you doing here?

Lee: The fountain of youth sent me.

Naruto: Oh, Gai.

Lee: You catch on quickly Naruto-kun. It seems that that duck has gotten quite a beating from Sakura-san. Did it peck her or something?

Naruto: No actually that's Uchiha Sasuke. That ego freak with natural blue highlights.

Lee: Really? Isn't that a woman?

Naruto: He had a sex change.

Lee: Why on earth would she do that?

Naruto: We keep asking, all he's doing is quaking when we ask, or huffing, either way he's talking like a friggin animal. We renamed her Amphibian Girl. Like it?

Lee: Ah! It seems to fit him well! Amphibian Girl it shall be! Nice Guy Pose

Meanwhile Sakura is still beating up Amphibian Girl

Lee: It seems that Sakura-san and Amphibian Girl are in a equal match.

Kyuubi: Idiot.

Lee: What did you call me?

Naruto: I didn't say anything! Although I do recognize the voice...IT WASN'T ME!

Lee: Then who was it? Where did it come from?

Naruto: I think cough up cough.

Lee: ...

Naruto: ...

Lee: AH I SEE!

Naruto: What? What was it?

Lee: The fountain of youth has finally answered my calls! (Kneels down, bowing saying something about youthfulness and shiny teeth)

Naruto: ...

Kyuubi: Wow! You think I really look that young?

Sasuke: OWWWWWWW!

Sakura: Ah that's the button!

Sasuke: THAT SURE AS HELL AIN'T NO BUTTON! NEVER HIT A MAN THERE!

Sakura: Man...?

Lee: What was that again? (Not the balls thing.)

Naruto: The fountain of youth!

Lee: Surly the fountain of youth would not sound so...ugly.

Kyuubi: U...g...l...y...

Naruto: Oh shit.

Lee: Where is that coming from?

Naruto: Loudspeakers?

Lee: Yes...that seems to be the only possibility at the moment...Whom art thou you beast who wonders in thy forest? (Translation: What's that ugly thing doing in my forest?)

Kyuubi: Thy forest? What kind of country do you come from?

Lee: I have traveled through and frau from Konoha, my home village!

Kyuubi: Jeez, you don't have to yell.

Naruto: Maybe if we stop talking he'll go away.

(Silence except for the sound of punches being thrown in the background.)

Kyuubi: Lalalala I love people guts Lalalala...

Lee: It didn't go away!

Naruto: Is that my fault?

Meanwhile...

Sakura: Sasuke you don't seem to be giving me all that power and kick butt you promised.

Sasuke: Surly you do not think of this as my full potential? No, I'm afraid you will never live to see that side of me...your too nice for that.

Sakura: Nice? You think I'm nice?

Sasuke: What else would you call yourself.

Sakura: You stepped on my apples...

Sasuke: I don't even remember that.

Sakura: You...don't...remember...? (Glaring, her face turning an odd shade of purple...or green, can't really tell.)

Sasuke: Yes, don't make me repeat myself, it's bad for my health.

Sakura: You...don't...remember...stepping...on...my...APPLES...!

Sasuke: Yes, see unlike you women I tend to forget trivial things such as "stepping on an apple" and tend to remember bigger things such as...oh lets see...power? Which men are more capable of controlling unlike you baby making machines.

Sakura: (Purple/green is now becoming a colour unknown to any human, animal or paranormal species.)

Sasuke: Have I hit you "button" Sakura?

Sports Commentator: In the next instant she is up at Sasuke's face pulling his tongue out...but wait...not through is mouth! Oh holy sushi it's though his nose!

Sakura: Oh look it is possible to make someone suffocate themselves by pulling their tongue through their nose!

Sasuke: (Grabbing throat and rolling around on the ground like a fish on land...oh wait...he is.)

Sports Commentator: Oh jeez Louise it's chicken in water! Or should I say a Platypus/Duck/Salmon/ all other water animals on land! It's like watching the discovery channel! Ah those were the days...

Sakura: (Stops Sasuke by stepping on his chest and breaking a few ribs)

Sakura: (Evil cackle)

Then all of a sudden a perfectly rounded boulder falls off a cliff right in Sakura and Sasuke's direction.

Sakura: Damn! It's just like in episode 158, part of the filler crap! Stupid bastards are gonna pay! Believe it!

Dubbed Naruto: Hey! That's my line!

Naruto: Shut up ya goodie-two-shoes!

Dubbed Naruto: I am not a goodie-two-shoes!

Dubbed Sasuke: (In over dramatic way) I shall get revenge one that one man...

Orlando Bloom: And thy shall parish in thy land (Makes out with random "hot" girl who's got long hair and is taller then him)

Dubbed Sasuke: Shit he stole my over-dramaticacy!

Lee: Have you forgotten about the boulder?

Sakura: No, but usually in anime, people have a nice little conversation before the boulder actually starts moving at a normal speed or some other random thing falling right at them.

Lee: Oh I see, so when this conversation is over the boulder will fall and we shall die?

Sakura: No we miraculously escape and thank the boulder for moving slowly for us.

Dubbed Naruto: Believe it!

Naruto: Oh shit! Look its another perfectly rounded boulder moving in the exact same direction as the other one!

Lee: And there is another perfectly egg shaped one right on the tip that wobbling!

Sakura: RUN EVEYONE! Sasuke, stay. Good ducky!

Sasuke: (Growl)

Dubbed Naruto: Shut up! You're beginning to annoy me! And that's pretty hard you know!

Boulder falls and ends up crushing the dubbed Naruto because he was to busy reciting different ways to say "Believe it"

Kyubi: Holy hell, am I really stuck in that kid in the English?

Naruto: HA! Now you shall finally learn how to appreciate me!

Kyubi: ...Actually being dead would be a lot nicer then this, even if I was stuck in that God of Death's stomach with Yondai-poo.

Lee: Naruto...

Naruto: Yeah?

Lee: Did you say Yondai-poo?

Naruto: No.

Lee: Then who did?

Naruto: "Believe it."

Dubbed Naruto: Help! I am being crushed by the dying weight of these boulders but I am showing no sign of struggle or pain because I'm not allowed to bleed due to crappy editing and crappy re-animation!

Sasuke: (Choke)...(Bleed)...

Sakura:. Really Sasuke, I expected more from an Amphibian Girl.

Sasuke: Oh really? (Big Duckly light emits from his body)

Lee: The Holy fountain of youth!

Naruto: (Singing) Animal crackers in my soup...

Dubbed Naruto: Oh by golly!

Dubbed Sasuke: Must kill...must avenge Barbie...

Sakura: There's something called a washroom ya know!

Kyuubi: I never liked fish...

Light then begins to die off, as Sasuke now seems to be completely heeled of all his wounds. Even his tongue is back in its normal position.

Sasuke: (Punches the hell out of Sakura)

Lee: Sakura-san!

Dubbed Naruto: Oh no! To much blood! Must...edit...!

Sasuke: (Laughs Maniacally)

Sakura: Your dead!

Sasuke: I see you looking at me like I'm some kinda freak Like I got what you need, why don't you do somtin?

Sakura:...

Sasuke: Opps (Blush)

Dubbed Naruto: Learn your grammar young man!

Dubbed Sasuke: I LIKE IT!

Naruto: What the hell...

Lee: Oh she bangs! (Incase anyone forgot, that was William Hung)

Sakura: Britney?

Sasuke: I DID NOT! (Pupils appear) (GRRRRRRRRRRRROWL!)

He then does some Ninja crap to Sakura and she ends up on the ground, obviously she has fainted due to lack of testosterone.

Sasuke: Who's next? (Sounding like an old lady)

Sports Commentator: What will happen to Sakura? And if she doesn't wake up...who will fight her next? Next time on the "Please be patient I'm slow at updates" chapter of Amphibian Girl...BELIEVE IT!(It pains my fingers to type that)