Jack walked into the briefing room and into Hammond's office, stopping to knock of course. The general was talking to Sergeant Davis and that doctor… what's his name? Ah, the plant guy!

"… gotten into the computer system, sir," the sergeant was saying to Hammond as Jack invited himself in. George looked up from talking with them.

"Ah, Jack! Glad you could join us," he greeted. Jack looked suspiciously at his CO. A side glance really.

"Soo, what's up general?" he asked conversationally. Hammond looked at the two standing before him. They shrugged in apology. Jack lifted an eyebrow – something he'd picked up from Teal'c. "So what's this about it getting into the base computer?"

Davis spoke up. "Apparently, sir, it has invaded the computers searching for a place to grow or-"

"A place to grow?"

Plant guy nodded nervously. "Come on colonel."

Hammond gave a curious little chuckle. "You're gonna love this Jack." Jack gave him the look of mock terror. Davis led them into the Control Room and out into the hallway. Jack looked up at the Control Room ceiling; there was some growth that he hadn't noticed when he came in. It was beginning to look like a jungle – and feel like it too. He saw Siler working on something.

"Siler? Broken thermostat...?"

"Not my job, sir."

"Right." They kept moving. Davis noticed the comment on the heat, so did the plant doc.

"Colonel we think that the plant is using the electricity to make a suitable environment for itself."

"Oh? How's it coming?" Jack countered sarcastically. The doctor and sergeant didn't bother answering. Down the hall they went until Jack and Hammond found themselves in the stairwell. The elevator had been working minutes ago, but apparently the plant had now invaded that too. Jack made a disgusted hand gesture towards the stairs.

"Stairs sir? I didn't even know we had stairs…"

"After you colonel." Jack bowed his head in thanks.

"Thank you sir." They walked up a couple flights to arrive at a very green place. The guard blocked the door until the doctor showed his pass. The Marine allowed entry, but watched them very closely as if they were going to harm the plant. Little did he know… A doctor posted on the other side of the door handed the doctor/scientist a machete. Jack stared at it.

"A machete?"

The doctor nodded solemnly. Jack looked out in front of him to see… green.

"Sir, did you forget to tell the SGC to stop partying after St. Patrick's Day. I mean this is a little out of hand sir." Hammond chuckled genuinely.

"Yes colonel, it is." They kept going into the forest. Jack snapped his fingers.

"I knew something was up." The leafy plants were EVERYWHERE. There was not a spot of gray to be seen, it actually a nice change, but… phew! did it stink! Just then Daniel walked up behind the party. Jack gave Daniel a strange look and wrinkled his nose.

"Hey Jack."

"Daniel."

"Where's Sam?"

"At home," he choked. "A little much on the green, don't you think Danny? I mean I know you love St. Paddy's Day, but…" Daniel lifted both eyebrows and settled them again. He commented the walls.

"Yeah, but I love green…" Daniel mentioned sarcastically. O'Neill didn't fail to notice that Daniel also had a machete in his hand. He pointed it out.

"You too?"

Daniel nodded. "Yeah."

"You know how to use it?" Daniel threw him a condescending look. Daniel walked off and Jack followed. Daniel hacked and chopped his way through his already made path. Jack winced.

"See how fast it grows back? I cut this path a couple of minutes ago." Jack nodded. Daniel led them both into a lab where a bunch of scientists and doctors were working on something.

"What's this?" Jack asked curiously.

"All the base doctors, scientists, and botanists are here to try and stop the plant. They're engineering a genetic disease for it so that the rest of the base doesn't have to know about this… at least that's what I think they said," Daniel mused. Jack put on a blank face.

"So they're trying to kill it?"

"Yeah basically." Daniel snagged a fruit off of a loose vine and bit into it. Jack watched in fear.

"Isn't that dangerous?"

"Uh, no. They," he pointed to the scientists, "said that it was safe… and really good." Daniel walked off towards the workers. Jack looked suspiciously at the offending vine of fruit. It was taunting him. He grabbed one too. Hey, what the heck? He thought. It's not gonna be around much longer…Daniel turned as Jack was going to bit it. It was a slightly different color than Daniel's, but Jack figured that it wasn't ripe or something.

"No Jack! Not that one!!!" Daniel yelled. All the scientists turned to face the drama. Jack stopped the fruit at his mouth and stood there. Daniel pried the fruit from his fingers and tossed it down the corridor.

"Isn't that littering Danny?" The other man shrugged. Daniel carefully searched through the branches for the right fruit and plucked it off. He tossed it to the bewildered colonel.

"That's the right one Jack. Eat that one." Jack bit it. His eyes widened in delight.

"Wow." He stated it simply, simply enough to know that Jack liked it a lot.

"Daniel, how do you find these things?" he asked. Daniel was delighted. Fruit hunting got him away from whatever other work he had to do.

"Hold on." Daniel went to go ask the scientists if the formula was due anytime soon and got Jack a machete too. "Let's go."

So, for the better part of two hours, Jack and Daniel scoured the base for the strange fruits. They found that the best places were in the MALP room and near open electricity. Jack's hands had gotten overfilled so they had to go get a collection basket. Well, actually, they stole it. It was used for getting samples of the vine, so they washed it out thoroughly and used it. Jack's hands were smeared with the purple-pink coloration of the fruit and its pulp. His basket was topped with the odd colored fruits which Jack had colorfully named the Boraples (bore-a-pulls) because they tasted a little like bananas, apples, oranges, and something else. Daniel's hands were smeared a darker color, more purple-ly because he'd been pulling at the deadly fruits as well as the good ones.

"Jack, I don't know how long they'll last or even if they go bad," Daniel warned. Jack shrugged. The little thing had a bunch of seeds too, so by accident they could plant a new species of plant on Earth, if they weren't careful enough. Daniel knew what plans Jack had for the Boraples. He was probably going to bring them back for Sam since she was missing out on it. Daniel missed very little… depending on what it was. That did sometimes include the health of his friends.

"Jack, how's your ankle?" he asked innocently while Jack was washing the fruit. He stopped and flexed it.

"Barely even hurts now, that healed fast… I guess Frasier isn't always right," Jack mentioned. He didn't think it was that strange, though it was kind of odd. He knew that from that kind of fall, he should have been still limping. Jack figured it was psychological. Daniel, on other hand, noticed something else.

"Jack, you were still limping when you came up here… and before you started to eat the fruit…" he trailed off. Jack and Daniel looked at each other, eye to eye, and ran back to the infestation site.

"You guys can't kill it!" "Hold it, you guys!" Daniel and Jack yelled at the same time at the scientists. They looked at the two strangely. Jack held his hands up in mock submission.

"Look, I know this is odd, but you guys need to run some… tests... on the plant." The scientists looked at Daniel for translation.

"Get Doctor Frasier in here. Now." One of the doctors dispatched himself from the group, took Daniel's machete, and ran to get Frasier, as the phones probably didn't work.