A/N: This is a play on that show, "I Want To Be A Hilton." (Which in my opinion is a joke of a show anyway, but whatever.) Sorry guys, I don't have time for replies today, as I have home stretching from New York to L.A. and back again. I promise I'll get to all of you in the next chapter though. (But it appears I've lost a few of my reviewers - Laur - this chapter.) Gah, is FFN still acting up? Because it is for me.

Every Halliwell Counts

Chapter 35: I Want To Be A Halliwell

----Alternate Reality----

Alternate Pamela let out a yawn, as she sat boredly in her Demonology class in the other worldly Magic School. As the telekinetic placed her hand up to her face, she noticed a glowing on her skin and her eyes traveled down to her neck, seeing that the diamond on her locket was glowing. Persia, in the middle of class? Come on! She cupped her hand over the glowing locket and raised her hand. "Excuse me, can I be excused?"

The teacher cocked an eyebrow. "Is there a reason for your request to depart class, Ms. Walker?" The teacher asked, glowering at the daughter of Alternate Prue Halliwell.

Thinking quickly, the telekinetic reached into her backpack and pulled out a long, white plastic covered package. "That time of the month," the fearless witch said as she waved the tampon at the teacher.

A bright red glow of embarrassment flushed the woman's face as she waved her hand. "Hurry, Ms. Walker." She said, before turning back to the whiteboard.

Snickers drifted across the classroom. They weren't at Alternate Pamela, as everyone in her class knew that she wasn't embarrassed by her display in the least. They were at the teacher, whom the witch had publicly embarrassed for the third time that year.

"Thank you," Alternate Pam chirped as she escaped out the door and snuck down to hallway to the bathroom where she slid into a stall and slid the tampon back into the pocket of her jeans. She opened the locket and to her surprise, Persia's face didn't appear. "Persia?" She held the locket away from her face and stared at the projection that came through from the other side of her cosmic telephone. A flood of horror passed over her body when she saw her best friend bleeding uncontrollably as a horrific demon advanced on her. "Persia!" She screeched, knowing that she didn't have enough time to summon a portal and get through. Forming a quick haiku spell, the directed the magic through the locket to the world outside her own, hoping beyond hope that it would save her friend.

----Real World----

The golden locket was enveloped in a sea of ivory globes of light and disappeared from its padded cushion of green grass.

----

"So what're you planning to do after High School?" Cole asked casually, as he turned his car onto the next street.

Tyler leaned back into the passenger seat. "College, I guess. I'm not sure what I'll maj-" Before he could finish, a swath of ivory lights deposited a small golden locket into the teenager's lap. His eyes widened as he saw the projection of some girl that he didn't know.

"Whoever you are, get Leo to go to Persia, now!" The projection yelled, her voice frantic and her eyes displaying the same.

As Tyler grabbed the locket, he and the locket vanished in an ivory display of lights.

Cole stomped on the break, stopping right in the middle of the street. Luckily nobody had been behind him or they would've rear ended the half demon's car. Placing his hands squarely on the wheel, he shimmered both himself and the car out, silently praying that nobody would see him. He knew what he had to do. He had to get to his daughter, so that she could call for Leo, as he wasn't one of Leo's charges and neither was Tyler, so both couldn't call the whitelighter as Alternate Pamela had warned them to.

----

The Firestarter tumbled forward, as Alternate Pamela's magic deposited him into the grassy part of the cemetery. He gaped as he saw the demon forcing its massive grayish-blue claw into Persia's chest. He could feel his stomach churning and he swallowed, holding back the urge to vomit right then and there. "Hey!" He screamed, waving his arms. "Over here, jackass!"

The demon turned around, the black hole that was its mouth becoming wider as a jelly substance oozed from it. Another beam of blue, like the one that had attacked Persia, jetted from the demon's humanish arm.

"Run!" It was Alternate Pamela's voice, as Tyler had never shut the locket.

Taking her advice, The Firestarter ran as fast as he could in the other direction, as his powers were still bound and he had nothing to defend himself with.

Near Persia, orbs culminated into the form of Leo Wyatt. His eyes wide in terror as he sank to his knees in the dewy green grass and placed a pair of healing hands over his niece. Her blood began to soak into his worn blue jeans and he had to force himself to concentrate on her. But he looked up and to his horror he saw the demon chasing after Tyler.

"Hey, kid! Stop and point the locket at the demon!" Alternate Pamela's voice echoed from the golden locket.

Sliding to the stop on the ground, Tyler flung around and pointed the locket at the demon as instructed. He heard the witch on the other end chant something and then he watched in amazement as the ugly demonic being flew across the graveyard and landed harshly against another white cement grave marker. "What did you do?" He asked, looking down at the locket.

The projection smirked. "I used a spell to channel my powers through the lockets." The projection scrunched up her face. "Who are you, anyway?"

"Who are you?" Tyler asked defensively.

"Are you a mortal?" The telekinetic's projection asked.

"Uhh-uhh, whoever you are, you might want to do that thing again!" Tyler gasped, scrambling to his feet and pointing the locket back at the demon.

"For crying out loud!" The projection snorted, followed by a few obscenities. She chanted again and the projection narrowed her eyes, sending the demon sailing through the air again.

"Tyler! Oh my gods!"

Tyler jerked his head up at the sound of the witch's voice. "Persia! Thank goodness, you're okay!"

"How did you-"

Tyler held up the locket, revealing the telekinetic's projection and a cocky smile.

"Pam!" Persia squealed in delight.

"You had better watch out, honey! Because he's back!" The projection of Alternate Pamela warned.

Persia whirled around and aimed a well energy bolt at the demon, sending him sliding across the ground.

"What the hell did you go and get yourself into?" The projection grumbled, raising a pair of dark brows.

"It's a long story, I'll have to explain later, Pam." Persia said apologetically. "But thanks for whatever you did."

"Yeah, yeah," the telekinetic's projection replied. "I'll see you later." With that, the connection ended and the projection of Pamela Walker faded away.

"Who was that?" Tyler asked, bewildered.

"An old friend," Persia smiled as she snagged the locket with the broken clasp from The Firestarter. "Thanks, by the way." She pocketed the broken locket and turned back to the demon, who was struggling to its feet. She swirled her palms together, energy crackling between them, and then thrust them forward as a continuous jet of neon energy pummeled from both of her hands and entered into the chest of the vile creature. "Uncle Leo!"

The whitelighter jobbed over to his niece, standing protectively at her side.

"I think you need to get Ty out of here."

"I'm not leaving you," Leo protested. "You were nearly dead when I found you!"

"But Tyler has no powers! He can't protect himself around me!"

"I'm not leaving," the blonde teen suddenly said. He folded his arms across his chest, stubbornly.

"How did you get here?" Leo asked.

"Mom drove me," Persia said as she began to tire from exhaustion.

"Go get one of the sisters," Tyler instructed as he wrapped his arms around the witch and stabilized her against himself.

"But-"

"Go, Leo!" Tyler said, his voice raising dramatically.

Leo dematerialized in a cloud of orbs, hoping that Persia would still be holding her own by the time he returned.

----

"Kase, can you pass the flour please?" Phiona asked as she poured a fourth of a cup of cooking oil into a large, brown ceramic bowl.

"Sure," a frizzy orange haired girl said as she shoved a large blue and white paper bag of flour at the witchlighter.

"Thanks," Phiona called as she snagged the bag and began to pour herself a cup of flour for the brownies she was working on. But as she grabbed the butter knife to level off the top of her cup, a manicured hand slapped down across her own. Phiona swallowed hard, glancing up the arm and finally to its owner's face. "Joanna," she smiled grimly.

Aquamarine irises bore into Phiona's baby blues, as Joanna slid the butter knife away from Phiona.

"I was, uhm, I was using that.." Phiona murmured.

"And now I'm using it," Joanna spat. Her golden blonde locks had been neatly pulled back into a ponytail with a strand of hair encircling the ponytail holder under it, so it looked as if her hair was holding itself there. She wore a colorful floral patterned, puffy dress with a full lacy trimmed white apron complete with an array of colorful embroidery.Delicate white Mary-Janes hugged her feet. She looked like a younger version of a classic fifties housewife.

Wonderful, now I've got Super Snob here too! Phiona said, brushing the white powder off her simple white apron as she fled the kitchen, telling one of the teachers that she'd be back in a minute, she needed to use the bathroom. Of course that was a lie, she just wanted to get away from Joanna. Ever since her elder cousin's first encounter with the girl in Magic Mat Ball, Joanna had picked on he shy daughter of the witch and whitelighter. Taking so close after her mother, Phiona was not one to fight back when she was picked on, she simply left to avoid further abuse. The young witchling escaped out the front door, cutting behind the school, and finally into the enclosed playground that seemed desolate enough. Unfortunately for her, she saw a young boy in the distance. He seems lost. She mentally noted, as she strolled over to the swings. "Can I take a seat?" She asked, a casual tone.

"Sure," the scrawny boy said gloomily as she stared down at the dusty ground beneath the swing. "It's a free country."

"Thanks," Phiona replied as she seated herself onto the swing and took a tight hold of the hot, interlooping metal chains. A few more minutes of silence lasted between them, until Phiona finally asked the young man his name.

"Chase," came his sour reply.

"Are you new here?" Phiona asked, knowing not just anyone could enter the school.

"No, I'm not even a witch."

That came as a surprise to the young witch-whitelighter and she sat up a little straighter. "What are you?"

"A mortal."

"How did you-"

"Get here?" The boy turned his irritated face to Phiona. "My cousin goes to this school, okay! I'm living with them while my parents are off on another military base across the states!" He had large green eyes, like huge leafs from deep in an African jungle, complete with sparkling dew. His lips were full and rosy. The young mortal wore a simple white collared shirt with lavender threading, a pair of simple white pants, and black dress shoes. His short sandy-brown hair was combed out nicely and when he spoke his voice was rather high.

"Sorry." Phiona tilted her head to the ground. "I didn't mean to make you mad or anything.."

"Whatever," Chase snorted irritably. After a short moment, he looked back at her. "What's your name, anyway?"

"Phiona."

"Wyatt?" Chase's face perked up. "Phiona Wyatt? As in, Pearlinda Belland's cousin, Phiona Wyatt?"

"What's it to you?" Phiona asked, returning the boy's coldness from earlier.

"Oh my God! Joanna hates your family with a fiery passion!"

"Joanna? You know her?"

"She's my cousin."

"Oh!" Phiona leapt from the swing and landed on both feet, causing a dust cloud to encircle her. "That's what I get for trying to be nice! Joanna's cousin!" She began to stalk off.

"Wait!" Chase hollered, running after the witch.

"What?" Phiona asked, swirling around to meet Chase's excited gaze. "I really don't want to talk to Joanna's cousin."

Chase's eyes darkened. "Why?"

"Because I know her kind, you'll just give her more dirt on me and my family."

"No," Chase replied stubbornly. "I won't. I don't like her either. I'm only her cousin by marriage. Her sister married my dad, just after my parents broke up. They met in the military, which my mom hated. But when they got switched clear across the country, they decided they didn't want to de-root me, so Joanna's mom offered to let me stay with them. Her mother's okay, they're nothing alike in fact. It's her dad that spoils her rotten, he doesn't really like me though..." Suddenly he stopped, realizing that he was giving away his life history to a complete stranger. "Ya know what, never mind. You've made your point." He turned on his heel and began to walk away.

"Wait!"

But Chase simply ignored the witch, keeping his course back to the swing.

"I said wait!" Phiona yelled, flinging out her arm and forcing a stream of orbs to extract from her palm and fly around Chase's ankles, holding him in place.

Chase felt his body lurch forward, when he attempted to step. He stared down to see a swarm of glowing balls of blue and white light around his ankles. He turned his head to see Phiona with her arm outstretched.

"What is that?" The mortal asked, pointing to his ankles.

A grin spread across Phiona's face. "My power," came her simple reply. She pulled back her arm and the orbs vanished. "Wanna talk?"

----

Prue narrowed her eyes, telekinetically flinging the sickening being into the into a nearby rose bush, that someone had planted for a beloved. "Come on already!"

"Maybe you need the power of four to vanish it?" Persia asked, sending another pulsating jet of power into the creature.

Prue just shrugged, shoving her hands together and forming a telekinetic throat hold on the demon.

"Well we can't let it get away until we know why it was after our innocent." Persia gave a sympathetic look to Tyler and then returned her attention to her aunt. "Why didn't Uncle Leo just bring Aunt Piper?"

"Because she'd probably blow up the cemetery instead of freeze our beast," Prue replied.

----

"Lady, wait a minute!" Phoebe screamed, nearly breathless as she chased the copper haired girl down the street. "I don't have all day here!" But before she could catch up, orbs formed into the shape of her brother-in-law, directly in the girl's path.

The copper haired female elicited a scream of panic, before fainting, and falling right into Leo's arms.

"Well it's about time!" Phoebe exclaimed, slowing to a stop and panting worse than a dog.

"Yeah, it is," Leo retorted. "Who is this?" He asked, lifting the girl into a better hold.

"Our innocent."

"Is that why you left Persia to nearly get herself killed?"

"What?"

"When I found her, she was less than a minute away from imminent death."

Phoebe's mouth fell open into an 'o' shape. "Wh-what?"

"Come on!" Leo snapped, grabbing the witch's arm and orbing the three of them away.

TO BE CONTINUED...