Disclaimer: Alas, Padfoot, Prongs, and Moony are not mine, they're JK Rowling's. Wormtail is, too, though the thought gives me warm feelings inside. Helen Shiring is of my own creation, though.

Stage 3: The Hook-Up

Remus snuck a glance at Sirius and James while taking a drink of pumpkin juice. Those two had gone off to the Ravenclaw table, and they weren't back yet. He was suspicious of their motives. If he discovered that every student at Hogwarts knew of his crush, there would be some dead bodies for the teachers to find... Though, he was surprised to note that they weren't talking to Shiring. Instead, James was on one end of the table, Sirius was on the other, and they both seemed to be flirting rather heavily with the girls over there. He rolled his eyes. Just so long as he didn't have to contend with taunts, giggles, and whispers, he didn't care what those two did.

Besides, he was still feeling uncharitable toward them because of their behavior during and after Potions. He had long thought that they should give Snape a break after proving that they were better with magic than he was, but they continued to harass him. Remus sighed, poking at his food despondently. Despite what he thought, he'd never work up the nerve to defend Snape. It wasn't that he liked the boy. He just didn't like the way his friends acted when Snape was around.

They weren't bad guys, really... They just liked joking around, sometimes a little too much. Which brought up an interesting point. James and Sirius loved pranks. Remus snuck another look over at them. Could this be another one? He couldn't see what flirting with Ravenclaw girls had to do with a prank, but with those two involved, one could never tell. They usually let him in on the joke, but every once in a while, they did things just between the two of them, and it was very hard to connect the dots until after the trap was sprung. He frowned at his fork. Sometimes, it just didn't pay off to trust James and Sirius.

Remus was brought back to his immediate surroundings by Peter. "Have you started the Transfiguration essay we're supposed to do for McGonagall? I'm mostly finished, but I still have four more inches to go, and she can always tell if you're just trying to fill up space."

Remus shrugged. "Yeah, I finished it during an off-period yesterday."

"Oh, can I read it?" Peter asked.

"Certainly not. That would be cheating."

"Please, Moony? It's just four inches..."

"Which you can easily write yourself. We don't even have Transfiguration until tomorrow. You can finish it tonight in the common room." Remus looked up to see James and Sirius returning, both looking rather pleased with themselves. "All right, out with it," he said as the two sat down across the table from him and Peter.

"Out with what?" asked James, looking extremely innocent as he shoveled some mashed potatoes onto his plate.

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about, now spill."

"I'm sure we don't know what you're going on about, Moony," Sirius drawled, also focusing on food.

"Oh? Then why were you over at the Ravenclaw table?"

"So we're not allowed to have friends in other Houses, is that it?" James glanced up briefly through raised eyebrows.

Remus rolled his eyes. "I'm so sure that you two were talking to friends. That's why half the girls at the Ravenclaw table are now blushing."

"Are they?" Sirius nonchalantly glanced over his shoulder. "Can't say why."

"No, won't say why would be more accurate."

Sirius grinned smoothly. "You're too uptight, Moony my friend. You should relax."

"If this 'relaxing' involves flirting with Shiring, then you have another thing coming."

"Shiring who?" James asked, still cloaked in feigned innocence.

"Okay, now I know you two are up to something."

"Padfoot, have you finished your Transfiguration essay?" Peter asked suddenly.

"Yeah, I finished it a few days ago. Why?"

"Can I read it?"

Sirius shrugged. "Sure. I left it in our dorm, though."

Remus rolled his eyes and got up from the table, picking up his bag. "We have Charms next, you guys coming?"

"But we haven't eaten yet!" James looked longingly at his still full plate.

"It's your own fault you spent your lunch hour frivolously. Now come on."

"Just because you don't like flirting, Moony, doesn't mean it's a frivolous way to spend time," grumped James as the group headed out of the Great Hall.

"And just because you like flirting doesn't mean it's not a waste of time," retorted Remus mildly.

"Black!" The four stopped and turned to see a pretty girl from the Ravenclaw table hurrying across the entrance hall toward them. Sirius' posture changed subtilely, and he fairly oozed arrogance. The Ravenclaw girl stopped in front of Sirius, blushing.

Just as she started to speak, though, Sirius rode over her. "Rooke, I said later."

"But you didn't say when," she insisted. Remus lifted an eyebrow and looked to James for an explanation, but James pretended not to notice.

"Later." She seemed about to protest some more, but Sirius stepped closer to her and the difference in their heights became rather apparent. He smiled smoothly, put his mouth right by her ear and whispered something intimately. Her blush deepened, and she smiled at him as he pulled back.

"Later then," she said, backing away a little. Her smile widened, and she turned, hurrying back toward the doors to the Great Hall, where several of her friends were, and the group started whispering furiously, accompanied by many glances at the Marauders.

The four started toward the Charms room again. Once they were a little away from the entrance hall, Remus asked, "O-kay, so what was that all about?"

Sirius shook his head. "Moony, Moony. I'm surprised at you. You get all huffy about us interfering in your love life, and then you presume to pester me about mine."

"I'm not pestering," Remus protested.

In front of them, a group of girls turned the corner and started walking toward them—including Shiring. Remus fought a valiant battle to avoid blushing and managed to win. However, one of her friends whispered something in her ear. She giggled and waved at Remus. "All right, Lupin?" she said shyly.

His charge faltered and petered out. The blush won. "H-Hullo, Shiring," he stuttered as she walked by. He turned to walk backward and saw her look over her shoulder and smile at him. He smiled back and waved. He kept walking like that long after she was out of sight until he was snatched by the sleeve and hauled around a corner.

"Hey! What was that for?" he asked angrily, turning around and straightening his robes.

"You were about to walk into a wall, mate," James explained, patting him on the shoulder.

Remus' blush deepened. "Oh. Uh, thanks."

Throughout Charms, neither Sirius nor James brought up the subject of Shiring. Remus was not about to complain, but he was a little suspicious. In Potions earlier, they wouldn't drop the subject if he'd paid them to, and now they were scrupulously avoiding mentioning it. The rest of the day of classes passed like that, and soon enough they were heading back toward the Gryffindor common room.

Sirius paused as they passed a corridor that led to the entrance hall. "You all go ahead," he said. "I have some business to take care of." Peter looked at him questioningly. "The essay's in my trunk."

"What business?" Remus asked.

"Contrary to popular belief, I do have a life that doesn't involve you guys," Sirius replied flatly, causing Remus' face to heat. "I'll see you later," he called, heading off toward the entrance hall.

Remus watched Sirius' retreating back. "What's up with him?"

James shrugged. "Nothing. He just gets into moods. Come on. We should get back to the tower before Filch shows up and tries to give us detention for loitering."

"Boo."

Remus started, disturbing the parchment in his lap as his head jerked up to see Sirius grinning at him. Remus took in his appearance with a blink. Sirius seemed ... rumpled, would be the best word. His robes were loosened considerably about his neck and appeared wrinkled in places, his hair was messed up, and there was a suspicious red mark on his neck.

"My, my. Jumpy tonight, are we?"

Remus ignored the question. "Where have you been? Curfew was up three hours ago."

"You're just full of nosy questions today, aren't you?" Sirius casually slouched into a chair between Remus and James. "I had business to take care of. I thought I already told you that."

Remus grunted suspiciously and returned to his homework. He blinked and rifled through a few of the pieces of parchment. "Hey, where'd my star chart go?" Sirius cleared his throat and pointed at Remus' feet. After a bit of rearranging, he managed to look over the edge of the chair and found the star chart and a few other things were on the ground. He looked up again at Sirius, who was the only one not covered in homework and lifted an eyebrow. "Would it kill you to give me a hand?"

"Probably. Blood loss and all that." He smirked at Remus' glare and sat up, reaching down to pick up the parchment on the floor. "I'm just messing with you, mate. I swear, you really need to spend some time relaxing."

"Thanks," Remus said, ignoring the crack as he took his parchment and started looking over his star chart to see what he was missing. After a moment, without looking up, he asked casually, "So, is everything going according to plan?"

"Perfectly," Sirius replied with relish, lacing his fingers together behind his head and slouching further in the chair. "I just—." He stopped and looked warily over at Remus. "Plan? What do you mean?"

Remus hid his smirk. "Nothing. Nothing at all."

"PEEVES!" roared a soaked Sirius. The poltergeist cackled and blew a raspberry at the Marauders as they glared at him from in front of the Fat Lady. "Oh, you're going to pay for that one, Peeves!" Sirius, with a malevolent glint in his eyes and a sadistic grin on his face, brandished his wand. Remus noted with amusement that Sirius Black could be soaked, raging, and half-asleep, and he was still handsome.

Peeves laughed and blew another raspberry. "Oh, look! Wacky Blacky's looking Sirius today!" He cackled.

"You better believe I'm serious, Peeves. You're going down."

A few minutes later, they were walking down the corridor toward the Great Hall for breakfast, leaving behind a rather bad-tempered closet. Sirius (now dry) sighed happily. "Ah, I love Saturday." He grinned at James. "Don't you?"

"Best day of the week," James answered, looking particularly pleased.

Remus looked between the two. It had been several days since they discovered his crush, and since then they had both acted like cats swimming in cream. Even Peter was starting to take on a knowing expression around Remus. Sirius and James had been disappearing at odd times, usually reappearing in various degrees of dishevelment. He wasn't at all sure what they were up to, but it worried him. They were up to something (their smug faces were way too obvious), and Remus was positive it had something to do with him.

Also in those intervening days, Shiring had spoken to him several times. He blushed slightly. The thought had occurred to him that Sirius and James were behind it, but he found he didn't care much.

They reached the entrance hall, and Remus immediately spotted Shiring standing by herself near the great doors that led out to the grounds. Remus stopped. Behind his head, Sirius and James smirked at each other. "Whelp," Sirius said loudly, stretching his arms over his head, "I'm off for breakfast. You coming, Prongs? Wormtail?" The other two agreed instantly and headed for the Great Hall. As he passed, Sirius whispered, "Try not to stand here staring all morning, hm?" Remus blushed.

Remus stood watching her for a moment, working up his nerve. He straightened his posture, lifted his chin, and crossed the entrance hall. "All right, Shiring?"

She turned and smiled at him. "Hey, Lupin." She giggled. "I was waiting for you. Do you want to go walk with me?"

Remus, ignoring the heat in his face, smiled back. "I'd love to." Throwing caution to the wind, he turned and offered his arm to her hopefully. Giggling, she took it, and they headed out to the grounds.

By the doors to the Great Hall, Sirius and James stood watching with their heads together. "You know," Sirius drawled, smirking, "I almost want to follow them. But then, Remus is such a gentleman. It probably wouldn't be any fun."

"Yeah, and I'm hungry." James paused. "Besides, we can always get the details from her friends." They shared a look. "You know she'll tell them."

Sirius' smirk widened. "So true. Very well. Let's get some breakfast then."

"She kissed you?" Peter asked incredulously.

"Hey, way to go Moony." Sirius nudged him, a suggestive grin on his face. "I never pegged you for moving so fast."

"Well, it's not like I planned it or something. She kissed me."

"Hey, give yourself some credit, mate." Sirius smirked. "She had to like you before she'd kiss you."

James snickered. "Aw, twue wuv."

Remus blushed. I seem to be doing this a lot lately... "It's not true love. It was a kiss on the cheek. By the lake. After a conversation about romantic places... Like ... a lake ... in fine weather..."

"Fine weather like we're having now?" Peter asked.

"Besides, I didn't say 'true love.' I said 'twue wuv.' There's a difference."

Remus cocked his head. "Like what?"

"Well, true love is like me and Evans." The other three snickered. James puffed his chest out, readying himself for the punchline. "While twue wuv is like Padfoot and his reflection."

Sirius, without a change of expression, casually punched James in the arm. "How about not?"

James fell over, holding his arm and writhing on the grass. "Oh, the pain! The agony! Padfoot, you've wounded me for life! I'll never be able to throw a Quaffle again!"

"Hey, is that Evans?" Peter asked, shielding his eyes and looking out across the grounds.

James was instantly on his feet again, straightening his robes and rumpling his hair. "Where?"

The other three burst out laughing. "My mistake, Prongs," Peter gasped between bouts of laughter. "Turns out, it was your dignity running for its life."

James' hands dropped to his sides, and he rolled his eyes. "Oh, very funny you guys."

The laughter slowly died down. "So, Moony," James said, intent on getting the subject back on Remus and Shiring, "what's going to happen now? Did she just kiss and run?"

Remus sobered, looking across the grounds at the spot where he and Shiring had sat talking that morning. "Well, no. We sat there talking for a while about classes. Then, she brought up how pretty the lake was, and how she thought lakes were very romantic in fine weather. I agreed..." His cheeks colored. "Then, she kissed me on the cheek, said she thought we should talk again, and went back into the castle."

"That sounds like a kiss and run to me," murmured Sirius, though not loud enough for Remus to hear. James elbowed him.

"It sounds like she likes you," Peter said.

Remus returned his gaze to his friends, smiling shyly. "Yeah. Yeah, it does."

"Well, if you want my advice," began Sirius, putting an arm around Remus' shoulders, but Remus brushed him off.

"No, I don't want your advice. You haven't had a successful relationship yet, and don't you start either," he added to James who had just opened his mouth.

"I have been in plenty of successful relationships," Sirius protested.

"Two things. First off, how do you figure that if you're single? And secondly, how can you have plenty of successful relationships? They'd all have to fail to make room for the next one!"

Sirius opened his mouth to reply, found himself at a loss of flippant comebacks, and closed it again.

"Congratulations, Moony," Peter slapped him on the back, "you're the first person ever to render Padfoot speechless."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, blah blah. Congratulations, you've outwitted me. For once."

"And the moment of peace has passed," sighed James. "Should've known it was too good to last."

Sirius crouched slightly, growling playfully, "Is that so? Think you can take me, Potter?"

James motioned for him to come on. "Bring it, Black. Let's see what you've got."

"Dog vs. Stag, Epic Battle of the Wizards," Peter smirked.

"Really? I would've pegged it as 'Ego vs. Pride, Pointless Battle of the Faults'." Remus and Peter shared a look and started laughing.

Sirius and James stood watching each other for a moment, then James asked, "Ready?"

"Whenever you are." They turned on the other two; James tackling Peter while Sirius tackled Remus.

"Lupin?"

They all froze and looked up to see Shiring standing there watching, somewhat bewildered. It must have been quite the amusing sight. Sirius had Peter in a headlock, both on the ground in a rather awkward position, while James had pinned Remus to the ground and was sitting on his chest. They had all frozen and were looking up at the Ravenclaw. For a moment, no one moved. Then Remus unceremoniously shoved James off him and stood up, brushing off his robes. "Good day, Shiring."

"Um..." She looked over at the other three boys (Sirius and Peter hadn't moved, but James was now lying on his back on the grass), then back at Remus. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," Remus said hastily.

Shiring looked doubtful. "Right."

"Yeah."

There was a moment of awkward silence.

"So," Shiring began, trailing off uncomfortably.

"Yeah."

"Um... I came to see if you wanted to go to the library with me to work on Flitwick's essay."

"Oh, yeah." Remus brightened. "Sounds great." Silence settled once more. "Oh, uh, is it okay if we swing by the Gryffindor tower? I left my bag there this morning."

"Right. Yeah, it's fine. I left my bag in the Ravenclaw tower, anyway."

"Right. Sure." He paused. "So, shall we go?"

"Yeah, sounds good." The pair walked off toward the castle without saying goodbye to the other Marauders, ignoring the sudden outbreak of laughter behind them.

Peter burst into the Gryffindor common room. "Sirius! James!" He leaned against the back of James' chair. "You've got to see this," he panted.

It had been a week since Sirius and James had succeeded in getting Shiring and Remus to socialize. Since then, they had left the rest up to Remus and Shiring, though they were discreetly snooping on their progress. After all, how were they supposed to help his relationship succeed if they didn't know what was happening?

"What happened to you?" Sirius asked, rising from his chair.

"I ran all the way from the grounds."

Sirius and James frowned at each other as they followed Peter out of the common room.

"Wormtail, mate, you're practically falling over," James observed. "You can hitch a ride to the grounds if you want."

Peter nodded gratefully. A few minutes later, Sirius and James emerged from an empty classroom. As they walked through the castle, Peter rested as a rat, snug in James' pocket. Before they reached the entrance hall, James let Peter out in a closet so he could transform back to himself, and they headed out onto the grounds.

"This way," he motioned, leading them out over by the lake. Following Peter's lead, they snuck across the grounds and hid in a group of bushes.

By the shore of the lake sat Remus and Shiring, holding hands.

It took a few moments for James and Sirius to stop snickering. "Well," said Sirius finally, "looks like we did our job well, Prongs."

"Indeed."

A mischievous grin slid onto Sirius' face. "Watch this." Under the cover of the bushes, Sirius changed to the form of a large black dog. He frisked for a moment, chasing his tail, then leaped out of the bushes and charged over to Remus and Shiring. Barking loudly, he jumped right between him, his tail wagging furiously.

The couple broke apart, each with a very different reaction. Shiring squealed, "Aw, look, he's so cute!" Sirius licked her face, and she giggled, scratching him behind the ears.

Remus, however, rolled his eyes, looking somewhat sullen. "Yeah, cute. Sure." He got whacked in the head by the wagging tail, and in turn, smacked Sirius in the leg. "Snuffles," he cooed in a baby voice. "Snuffles..." Sirius turned around, sat down, and cocked his head. "Good boy. I thought we'd taught you not to come onto the grounds anymore, Snuffles," Remus scolded, shaking a finger in Sirius' face.

"Oh, you know him?" Shiring asked, shifting around so she could pet Sirius again.

"Yeah. He's a stray that roams around Hogsmeade. Poor guy was half-starved when we found him in third year." Sirius whined, and Remus smiled, patting him on the head. He huffed, banging his tail once on the ground. "We found someone to take him in, but the little guy followed us back to Hogwarts." Remus sighed in a long-suffering manner. "We just can't keep him away."

"Funny, I've never seen him before," Shiring muttered absently, scratching Sirius' side until his leg started twitching.

"Yeah, he hides on the grounds until he sees one of us."

"Who's 'us'?"

"Oh, sorry. Me, James, Sirius, and Peter. Where did those guys get off to?" He looked around, trying to find his other two friends so he could get rid of Sirius.

James appeared out of some bushes and whistled. "Snuffles! C'mere boy!" Sirius' ears pricked, and he barked eagerly, bounding up and running off toward James.

"Finally," murmured Remus. "I'll kill them later."

"What?"

"Oh, uh, I just said 'That's much better.' It really isn't good for Snuffles to roam around the grounds. Filch wouldn't like it if a big black dog got into the castle and started chasing his cat."

Shiring looked downcast. "Oh, I hadn't thought of that... You're right." She smiled and scooted over to sit next to him again, resting her head on his shoulder. "This is nice, isn't it?"

Remus blinked, pulled out of his happy reverie caused by having a pretty girl leaning on him (him, not Sirius or James for once). "Hm? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it is."

"Just you and me and a beautiful Saturday afternoon." She sighed contentedly.

Thank God it's the new moon.