Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, or any of the characters that appear in the anime/manga series. I like cake.

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Feh. It's another woman. I'm seriously annoyed as I watch my target closely. A-Class missing-nin, one of Stone village's only genjutsu experts, at least before she defected. I could just imagine the Hokage sitting in her office laughing her ass off. Or chuckling in her sleep, I suppose. I just know she has an entire stack of jobs involving the capture of female missing-nin labeled the 'Shikamaru pile'. It was too troublesome to complain.

I give a quick glance at my surroundings. In a forest, the ninjutsu and taijutsu specialists wouldn't have to worry about finding the ideal battleground to take down another fighter. However, my family jutsu does not give me that leeway. Too high up in the trees, and the jutsu's practically useless. Too low and I'll be discovered too soon. Add in the fact that she's a genjutsu-type, practically effective anywhere in the forest, and I'll be discovered too soon. She's traveling along the mid-level of the forest, so I'll have to stay above her, and then drop down and deliver a quick knockout.

She speeds up, starts leaping straight forwards, not bothering to cover her tracks. I can barely keep track of her, being on another level and trying to chase her. Then again, had my position been compromised? Did she know I was tracking her?

She slows down after some time. I realize it was all just a feint. A rather good one. If a less experienced shinobi tracking her had assumed his position was known, and needed to initiate a confrontation, they would most likely have dropped down to her level to chase her, giving their position away entirely. She hadn't known I was tracking her at all. I continue following, until I hit a snag. The forest was beginning to thin out quite a bit, and I was running out of places to hide real fast. No choice then, but to strike.

I toss a kunai at her. It was easily seen, but the moment she tried to deflect it, the explosion tag on the kunai goes off. I circle around to where the explosion should have thrown her. She's obviously not there. I know what's coming already. I wait until the ground beneath me starts rumbling. I leap back as her hands come out of the ground and pull hard on one wrist. I twist her arm behind her back and have a kunai pointed at her neck before she can react.

As she realizes what the metal touching her flesh is, she stops struggling and I'm able to get a good look at her. She's rather pleasant on the eyes, and the sweat and gasping breaths she took from having avoided the explosion and digging underground was doing wonderful things for her body. Soft pale pink tempted me, bringing on a strange desire for me to kiss them. It was too much trouble to stop myself.

I'd never had a woman before, so the things I'd found out were pleasant surprises. I kissed her passionately, conveniently banishing the fact that this was an enemy kunoichi to the back of my mind. It seemed as if she similarly forgot, and after a few moments' hesitance, returned such affections.

I experienced a strange euphoria as we proceeded. I certainly didn't expect to get to second… wait, third base while on this mission. Oh, this will look rather unimpressive on the mission report. "Konoha shinobi loses self control on mission; sexually violates captive." I can see it already. Hokage-sama's definitely putting me through a wall for this.

Except for my underclothes, there was practically nothing between the two of us at the moment. The heat of the moment has been driving me to do so many things I've had no control over, and I'm fairly certain that unless something happened soon, what's left of my clothing would be coming off, too.

She smiled, but not in a kind way. Nor was it induced in a rush of passion. I've seen this before, it's the 'you've just fallen into my trap' smile. I groaned. The lust and euphoria I'd felt moments ago disappeared faster than ramen in Naruto's bowl. Of course, I'd gotten careless and forgotten so many key facts about the mission.

She was a genjutsu specialist, and I knew it. Typical male shinobi, she gloated. A chance to get laid falls into their lap and not a single one of them will pass it up. Even at the expense of their lives. I was unarmed, and embarrassingly naked. She was unclothed too, but had somehow gotten her hands on my kunai during the… festivities. She shifted her body so as to give me the best possible view, as if to gloat once again This is why you're losing your life. She raised the kunai, as if to slit my throat, and then stopped. A surprised look came over her face. I smirked.

Kage mane no jutsu was a success.