DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter or related places, characters, things...you all should know that just as much as I do...
LYRICS DISCLAIMER: I don't own the lyrics...which are in italics, Emiliana Torrini does. Go listen to the song.
WARNINGS: SLASH...MALExMALE relationships...
A/N: I know I should be writing the next Chapter to 'Omniscient, but this was floating around my head ever since I had read the lyrics.
'When you look into his eyes, you wish that…no one else could see him, no one else could feel him."
Merman - Emiliana Torrini
Sirius feels it. He feels the need to lock the werewolf away from prying eyes every time he sees the amber pools moving over top of the words in a large tome and they then catch him staring. Sirius really feels it when those amber orbs lock onto his own fathomless grey eyes. Sirius doesn't want to share Remus with anyone else. Sirius wishes that he could wrap Remus up in his arms and never let go.
Sirius wants to make sure that no one else gets those exact veiled looks from Remus. So it's all natural that he doesn't want anyone else watching Remus. Sirius feels the need to beat the piss out of every other boy that dares to even breathe in Remus' direction.
One time Sirius was walking throughout the halls of Hogwarts late one night looking for Remus. Sirius had headed up to the Library and was merrily humming some sort of song Remus had been playing earlier. He had passed a couple of Fourth Year Slytherins who were coming back from the Library.They had looked at him with wide eyes at first and then laughed behind their hands.
Sirius growled at the younger students before stalking closer to the Library. When he had entered the Library, Remus' had already focused his eyes on the door, as if waiting on Sirius to enter. Remus' shaggy auburn hair was ruffled around, parted uneven and some parts hanging over his golden eyes. And when Sirius had walked over to Remus, the werewolf had smiled. The sight had practically knocked Sirius down, but he held his ground. Sirius had finally convinced Remus to come back to the dorm, but on the way out he had noticed familiar indigo eyes watching every move he made.
The next night the same event had occured, Sirius truding up to the Library once again to gather Remus. But this time Sirius had left earlier and had arrived at the Library door faster than he had before. Remus hadn't been at his normal sitting place, so Sirius decided to explore the Library to find him.
Sirius had found him behind a shelf of books on Black Shucks. But Remus hadn't been alone. A boy who looked strangely familiar had a hand on Remus' shoulder. Sirius' mind had screamed 'I know that boy!' And know that boy he did. That boy was Regulus Black. Remus had moaned as Regulus moved over his adam's apple and onto a smooth scar.
Sirius had felt sick to his stomach at the sight of someone other than himself touching Remus like that. So the Animagus had turned around and walked out of the Library and back to the Common Room. He had figured that Remus could make it back on his own. But what Sirius missed was Remus calling his name out in a moany breath. Regulus had dismissed it, thinking Remus had whispered 'Regulus.'
And Sirius forgave Remus for that. How could he not? How could Sirius have resisted the sad look in Remus' eyes when he hadn't talked to the werewolf for two days after that. When Remus had asked him what was wrong, Sirius had told him he hadn't felt good. And though Remus didn't believe him, not one bit, he had taken that as an answer and everything had went back to normal.
And Sirius definitely feels the shivers from the feeling of Remus' fingers brushing his own. Oh does Sirius feel it.The Animagus definitely feels it when Remus' hand is on his shoulder, sending shocks, and it is meant to comfort but it just makes him tenser than he already was.
The dark haired boy can feel it whenever Remus is in a room. He can smell him, thanks to Padfoot, he hear him breathing ever so lightly, and he can feel him as well. Sirius can feel it as soon as Remus' foot crosses the crack in the floor of the doorway as if it were a threshold into a parallel universe. When the werewolf walks in the doorway it seems to Sirius as if the room is spinning and the sounds around him are rippling. Because as soon as he sees the golden boy everything else leaves his mind.
And Sirius wonders. He wonders if dear old Regulus feels the same way about Remus. He wonders if Remus feels the connection with Regulus that Sirius himself feels with his werewolf. Padfoot asks himself if it's wrong to refer to Remus as "his". Because after all, Remus doesn't belong to him. And Sirius has to ask himself if Regulus would have became an animagus for Remus. If Regulus would put up with the bumps, scratches, bruises, and the gashes for Remus. Because Sirius knows that he, himself, would. Hell, he already has.
0o0o0o0o0o0o
Remus can always feel it when Sirius' dark eyes are on him. And he can always feel the heat radiating off of Sirius' hard body from many steps away. And he's like a moth to a flame; he to that heat. But unlike the moth, he turns away just in time to not get burnt.
And Remus thinks to himself that is exactly why he chose Regulus. Because with Regulus he can't be burnt by the sun. Regulus has Sirius' build; tall, lean, but nicely toned. Regulus has Sirius' silky midnight hair, albeit it is shorter than Sirius'. The younger brother has Sirius' skin tone, lips, and the same freckle on his cheek; although, it's on the other cheek. But Remus can tell the difference between Sirius and Regulus. Whereas Sirius has wonderfully enigmatic grey eyes, Regulus' are indigo with a light grey starburst around the pupil and they're certainly not as deep as Sirius' are.
And Remus can see that to him, Regulus is a subsitute for Sirius. But to Remus it doesn't matter, because Sirius doesn't see him as he sees Sirius. Remus can always tell by the look in Regulus' grey-ish indigo eyes that Regulus knows Remus doesn't love him and he doesn't seem to care.
And he can tell by the expression on Regulus' rounder face that he thinks that it's nothing as well. But Remus also knows that it doesn't matter, because it's so obvious that Sirius doesn't see him like that. And to Remus Julian Lupin, Sirius' friendship means much more than trying to see if Sirius loves him.
0o0o0o0o0o0o
There it was again. The sound rippling and the spinning of the room, and then Remus came into his line of vision and Sirius' breath caught in his throat. Because Remus was there, making his way to the door down to the Dungeons, his robe off and neatly folded over his arm, his tie hanging loosely around his neck, and his shaggy hair falling in front of his eyes.
Sirius thinks to himself that if his heart were to beat any louder than it already was, Remus would be able to hear it at Beaubaxton's. So the dark haired boy called out to the boy with auburn locks, who in turn started and turned toward the voice.
0o0o0o0o0o0o
The werewolf had practically been able to see his head on a tiny moth's body, flying faster and faster towards the sun who had Sirius' face.
0o0o0o0o0o
Amber eyes had trailed up to the charcoal ones and stopped when they had reached the gorgeous destination. At first Sirius could feel it. The need to pull Remus closer by his loosely done tie. The need to press his slightly chapped lips towards Remus' perfectly shaped and smooth pink-peach ones. But Sirius could feel it. Slowly those feelings, wants, and needs had somehow sunk down deeper, and Sirius could feel it. He could feel the nonexistent valediction making the ripples.
'When you look into his eyes, you feel he's telling you goodbye' Merman- Emiliana Torrini
la fine
