A/n: I don't own anything, although I wish I did own Roswell, because then I would of made a better ending for season three!
Summary: Maria finds out who she really is and her mother wasn't exactly 'pregnant and abandoned' its candy but it will have a lot of angst in it please review, good or bad it will mean a lot to me. Crossover, buffy/Roswell, Maria's POV!
I don't know were to start...so instead im going to begin at the end, the end of my sanity, love, emotions and life.
I can never go back to normal, no matter how hard I've tried I know now that im simply not and I resent that more then myself. It all ended when I found myself huddled in the corner, resting my head in my lap, trying desperately not to let a sob escape.
Although I tried a sob inevitably escaped from my lips I quickly cover my mouth with my hands, praying to whatever god there was that he didn't hear me...
I soon hear footsteps coming closer to were I sit I hide my face in my hands, not wanting to see the man who has taken everything from me... death would be the only good thing he could bring me, Instead he stares at me, emotionless as if he has no soul, no heart. Although I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't have any of them after all what he just did to my mother is unforgivable.
"Mar..." he stops, "Were is she?" he demands as he stands there looking down at me emotionlessly.
I ignore him, not knowing what he wants but even if I knew I wouldn't tell him anyway. I feel his rough hands pull me up from my crouch position, demanding me for an answer.
"What do you want?! I have NOTHING, you have taken everything from me!" I whisper coldly as I jerk my wrist away from his grasp.
"You know what I want Maria! Tell me were she is or you will regret it!" he whispers into my ear.
"I don't even know who you are... you have already taken everything from me, death would be the only good thing you could bring!" I cry, trying to push him away from my body.
He throws me against my wall, doubting that he even realised that he hurt me and if he did I can tell he doesn't care.
"You wont end up like her" he points at my mother, her body lying lifelessly on the ground, blood surrounds her helpless, small body. Discussed with myself for not even trying to help her...instead I just laid in the corner, hoping he wouldn't come after me.
"You...you bastard!" I yell, my voice failing me as I see him smirking.
"Trust me when I say, your mother had it coming" He says bitterly as he laughs. He walks up to my mother's body and he kicks her. All I see is more blood, dripping out of her flesh, my body refuses to move and my eyes seem to linger on the blood which drips.
I feel tears stream down my cheeks, yet my eyes don't seem to want to move as I see the man I don't even no continuously kicking my mother's dead body.
"St...STOP!" I cry desperately, "She is...she is already DEAD! Let me burry her body in one piece you sick bastard!" I spit bitterly. He turns around and for the first time he meets my eyes as I see how cold they truly are. I shiver in remorse for my mother, who I didn't even try to save, her screams echo in my mind, knowing that I will have to live, or die with that look of betrayal that she left me, in her eyes.
The guilt, which washes over me, is unbearable and what makes it worst is her death was unjustified.
"You fucken sick bastard!" I cry as I run towards him, trying to punch him yet with no success he kicks me in my stomach, I lie on the floor, gasping for breath that I have just lost. I lie there helplessly; I disserve this that much I know, how could I ever just leave my own mother to die! I scream in my head franticly.
"W-Why?" I ask desperately, needing to know the answer, how could he just come in our home and rape my mother and afterwards, kill her.
I see him hesitate as he tries to find the right words.
"She left me to die" he replies simply as he grabs my shoulders and shoves me across the other side of the room and into the wall again.
"Who the hell are you?!" I blurt out angrily as he walks slowly towards me with a smile placed on his face, which sends a shiver up my spine.
He doesn't answer though; instead he grabs me by the throat as I feel my feet lifting from the ground. I cant breathe although I struggle to try anyway, my eyes slowly drift back to my mothers body, I would rather look at her body, which is soaked in blood then the man who did that to her.
I feel the tears run down my cheeks even faster now, knowing that it's the only good thing, which could happen. Yet im not granted with the pleasure of death, instead he lets me go, my body falls on the ground as I gasp for breath. The hatred I feel for this man is beyond any words, it's a feeling, which will stay with me until I die.
"What...what are you?" I ask, while meeting his eyes, which seem so cold.
He smiles, "Im dead, I cant be much of anything" he replies, while smiling. I look at him with a questioning look on my face but anger over rides it instead.
"Why didn't you just kill me?! You sick bastard!" I scream hysterically. I see him shrug my words off so easily, which makes me want to lunge at him and attack him.
His face then turns serous "I can't kill my daughter..."