An/ I'm sorry that this chapter took long. To be honest I haven't been thinking of this story. Exams are so hectic. sigh. Anyways I hope you guys are still out there! Depending whether or not i have anyone actually wanting to read this then i will keep updating. I just need to know if you guys are still out there. Well anyway honest opinions are all i ask for so please read and review. enjoy
So what am I going to do? Daddy-dear is gone, fuck knows where? And my semi- off again on again boyfriend thinks I'm a murdering, insane, crazy lunatic who's lying to get herself out of this shit. It keeps getting better doesn't it? Next I will have the fucken blade to my wrist and digging my way back to sanity. Who knows? God I really have lost it hasn't I? Well I'm asking questions in my head which I know I won't get answers to so I would say yes. There I go again!
How can he still bear to touch me let alone hold me when he thinks I killed my own mother? How can he even think about hiding the body? Maria, can you really call that blood and carcass a body? God I think I'm going to be sick again… "Michael" I say but it comes out as a muffle due to the fact that my head is in his chest. "Shhh Maria, I know a place where we can hide the body, no one will ever find it. We can manipulate the structure of it to make it seem like a material object. We will think of something." He whispers as he holds on even tighter.
I rip away from his embrace, feeling the coldness hit me like a tone of bricks. How could he possibly think I had anything to do with this? "Michael! It wasn't me! I told you it was William! He…He…came in here and raped my mother and butchered her. God! I was there and I did nothing to stop him. I was so helpless Michael! So fucking helpless! And I left her to die. I heard her screaming, crying out for me to save her and I was a fucken coward!" And the tears just keep coming. I finally meet his eyes and what I see in them is enough to kill me. I'm a coward…I was expecting to see hate, shame maybe even pity but to see love and sympathy in his eyes…God I don't deserve it! I never thought I could ever read Michael like a book but there it is. All his emotions played out on his beautiful face.
"I left my mother to die Michael! What part of that don't you understand! Look at my hands, my cloths! I have blood, dried even, on my clothing and all you can do is look at me like, like I'm some sort of beautiful creature! You make me sick!" I sob in my hands. I'm overwhelmed with the desire to take the blade from Michael's hand and slit my own wrist if it hadn't been for the fact that it would only prove my cowardice. I've never felt so entirely alone, like no one in this world could understand.
"Maria…I know no one can possible imagine what you must be going through right now. I don't know what to say or do to make it all better but believe we when I say if I could somehow make your pain go away I would…I know I don't tell you this often but…I love you Maria and I'm going to be here for you just please don't lock me out.' He whispers as he slowly walks closer to me. I step back not wanting him to touch me. I feel like I don't deserve it. I don't deserve his love; I don't deserve any of it. "I need to call the police." I state as I walk in the other room where the phone is. It was the first logical thing I've said all day. I pick up the phone with my trembling hands and press the dials that I'm not use to. I hear the usual dial messages as they ask what they could do to help. "There's been a murder" I say.
The police come knocking at the door within 10 minutes. The sheriff is here and Michael lets them all in. I'm in the next room on the cream colored couch just wishing it all to be over.