I don't own any WWE superstars, but the kids are real and J. Marie is me!

Chapter 3: Welcome To Hell

Taker opened his eyes and looked around. Everything was sort of dim and blurry until his sight finally sharpened. He tried to stand up but found that he couldn't. He was tied up, and tight at that.

"Damn those kids!" he swore angrily. "Kids! Come untie me!"

"Now why would we do that?" AJ asked, appearing in front of him.

"Because you don't wanna see me mad," Taker said. "I can break out of these ropes, you know."

"Do it. You know you can't, old man!" AJ taunted, laughing as he noticed Taker getting angrier.

"You dare me? Funny!" Taker exclaimed. The transformation was short and sweet, and when it was over he seemed more muscular than ever. He easily stood up, breaking the ropes that had been holding him down.

"Shit!" AJ exclaimed, eyes bulging. Then he ran as fast as he could into the kitchen. "He's coming! He's coming!"

Taker laughed at this as he walked slowly into the kitchen. He didn't plan on hurting the little demons, but he did plan on having a little fun with them... He stepped into the kitchen, baring his teeth in an evil grin. "Now... Who shall I bite first?"

"Welcome to hell, Deadman," came a voice. He looked down. A few feet away from him stood Keysia, smiling sweetly. She showed him her neck. "You can suck my blood."

"Promise?" he asked. She nodded and he took a step closer... Then another... And then on the third step, his eyes widened when he stepped on some kind of trap and was suddenly dangling in midair, upside down from the ceiling.

"Attack!" Keysia called, and the boys ran out with various types of food in their hands. They uttered war cries and started throwing the food at him. Mashed potatoes in his face... Ice cream in his eyes... Pickles bounced off his stomach... Rice trickled through his hair... And then they pulled out the squeeze bottles.

Above him, the ceiling made a creaking noise and as he looked up, small web-like cracks slowly started to appear. He was over 300 pounds, much too heavy to be hanging from a ceiling. The whole thing would fall if he didn't get down soon.

"Kids," Taker began calmly. "Let me down. If you don't, the ceiling will fall down and you'll die."

"We won't die," Lonzo said. "We won't even be in here."

"You'll be in big trouble for destroying Auntie J. Marie's kitchen," AJ said. "She'll never invite you over again."

"Never," Dino cried. He looked around at the other kids in the kitchen, wearing a look that plainly asked, What are you asses waiting for?

"Right. Fiiiiiire!" Randy commanded, as if he could read Dino's mind.

All at once, the kids squeezed their bottles. They covered Taker in a variety of things, from ketchup, mustard, butter, mayonnaise, and jelly. In seconds, the bottles were empty and he was covered from head to toe. They're done, he thought, but he was sadly mistaken, for as soon as their bottles were empty, they pulled out more bottles and sprayed him mercilessly.

He shook a little, trying to avoid getting hit in the face, and that was when they all heard the telltale creak. All eyes were riveted to the ceiling as the cracks spread out even more, looking like weird veins on the ceiling.

"This crap's about to fall. We gotta blow this Popsicle stand," AJ said.

"AJ's right. Troops, move out!" Keysia ordered. The kids all vacated the room while she looked up at Taker, hanging from the ceiling. "Have a fun fall down into hell!" And then she ran out as well, leaving Taker hanging from the ceiling, where more and more cracks were appearing by the second.

He hated knowing what was about to happen. He contemplated using his claws to tear the rope and let himself free from the ceiling but he knew that either way he would be taking a very long ride down... So he waited for it. And when things started shaking and he started to fall, he didn't even get scared.

The kids were all out in the front yard when they heard the big crash. It sounded like the whole house was falling apart.

"Man! That had to hurt!" Lonzo said a few seconds after the crash.

"He can take it if he's a vampire like he says," AJ said nonchalantly.

"He's a vampire but that doesn't really mean anything. I wonder if he's ok?" Keysia asked, a hint of worry in her voice.

"You're worried about the thing that's gonna distract J. Marie from us?" AJ asked her angrily. "You want to share your time with J. Marie with someone like him?"

"No," she answered quietly. "But what if we killed him?"

They all looked at each other, eyes wide. They hadn't considered this before. What if they had killed him?

Somewhere below the kitchen floor, things were a mess. Furniture and supplies and everything were piled everywhere. The whole ceiling had indeed caved in, and with so much stuff and such a heavy impact, Taker (and everything else, it seemed) had actually fallen through the kitchen floor and into the basement below...

The kids cautiously stepped back into the house a few minutes after the crash. They walked into the kitchen and saw that the ceiling had fallen through the floor, and that actually kind of freaked them out.

"Where's the Undertaker?" Keysia asked.

"The Deadman?" Lonzo asked.

"The Original Deadman?" AJ asked, correcting Lonzo yet again.

"The Phenom?" Randy asked.

"The American Badass?" Dino asked.

"Dino said ass," AJ said for the second time that night.

"Shut up, ass. There's no time to play games. What if we killed him?" Keysia asked, looking around nervously.

"We just have to go down to the basement and see. Duh," Lonzo said.

"Right. Let's go," AJ said, and he led the way down to the dark basement.

They all looked around. Nothing moved and there was no sign of Taker.

"We killed him!" Keysia wailed. "I can't believe we're murderers and we're still in elementary school!"

"I'm not in school, dummy," Dino corrected. He was pretty smart for a two-year-old.

"Shut up, y'all, and look!" Randy said in a low whisper, pointing towards the middle of the pile of rubble before them.

Something moved. A hand, one huge hand, raised up out of the middle of the rubble. The kids gasped as the hand opened and closed, then shot a bird. It was definitely Taker's hand.

Pretty soon, that hand was followed by an arm, and so on and so forth until Taker threw off the rest of the crap that was holding him down and pulled himself up to his full height in the middle of the junk. He raised his hands up high and the kids thought he was about to beat them, but he wasn't. He was asking for help!

"Why? Why? What have I done to deserve this?" he called up into the heavens (actually up through the kitchen floor, which no longer existed). "I need guidance. These kids are crazy and evil!"

"Who is he talking to?" AJ asked. "God?"

The other kids shrugged.

"No, he's talking to me," an eerie voice said. The kids turned around and were face to face with the devil. He was short, red, and his tail was on fire. The kids were speechless for the first time ever. "Now that we have peace and quiet, let me introduce myself. I am the devil."

"We don't like you," Randy said immediately. "So you need to leave."

"I may need to, but I don't want to, and therein lies the difference," the devil said. He looked the kids over and his eyes landed on Keysia. "My, my, what a pretty little girl."

"Don't even think about it!" Taker said, walking over to them. "Not on my watch."

"You owe me. Are you talking to me, boy?" the devil asked Taker.

"Yeah, I'm talking to you, little man," Taker replied. "Now, you need to leave."

"But Satan Jr. needs a girlfriend and she seems about his size," the devil said, gesturing towards Keysia, who looked frightened. He saw the "no nonsense" look written all over Taker's face. "Ok, I'll make you a deal."

"What kind of deal?" Taker asked suspiciously.

"A pretty fair deal. I'm challenging you to a wrestling match," the devil said simply.

"What are the stipulations?" Taker asked.

"If I win, I get to take this girl and these boys," the devil said. "But if you win, I'll repair this mess for you and leave."

"Ok," Taker said, after thinking about what was at stake for a long time. "You're on, but on one condition."

"Name it," the devil said. "My son is waiting for his girlfriend and his new friends and you're delaying the delivery."

"I get to pick the match."

"Fair enough. What's your choice?"

"Hell in a Cell... On the roof," Taker said. His words echoed off the walls in the basement.

The devil's eyes widened, but he quickly pretended as though he wasn't shocked. "Fine. You're on. Let's do this."

"I'm gonna make you famous," Taker said.

"I'm gonna give you a proper welcome to hell..."

Not as good as previous chapters but the next chapter will be better (I hope)!