I don't own any WWE superstars, but the kids are real and J. Marie is me!

Chapter 4: Rooftop Hell In A Hell

"What are we waiting for? To the roof!" the devil ordered in his annoying and whiny voice.

The kids looked at the devil with fear in their eyes.

"Don't worry, little guys. You won't be going down to hell tonight," Taker assured them. "If anything, you'll just be seeing a little hell in a cell...on the roof."

"Do you promise?" Lonzo asked worriedly.

"Yeah, I promise," Taker replied. "Besides, J. Marie wouldn't like me anymore if I let the devil take you all to hell, would she?"

"Not at all," AJ answered matter-of-factly. "Actually, she would probably kick your ass all over Florida."

"Exactly right," Taker said. He looked at all the kids, then over at the impatient devil. "Ok, devil, let's make this ass-kicking short and sweet. Ready to lose?"

"Yep, you're definitely going to lose, you cocky mortal," the devil said. Then, with a snap of his fingers, they all suddenly appeared on the roof.

Taker and the devil were in the cell with a special referee. Lillian Garcia was standing next to the cage, and J.R. and The King were there to call the match. The kids held onto the cage so they could watch the match close up.

"The following match is a Hell In A Cell Match! Introducing first, from Death Valley, the Legendary Undertaker!" Lillian exclaimed. Taker simply raised one hand in the air and leaned in a corner of the ring. "And his opponent, from the murky depths of hell, the devil!" The devil did a pirouette in the middle of the ring and then did a graceful high kick.

"Boo!" AJ yelled.

"You suck ass, devil!" Keysia called.

"Keep talking! It only gives me motivation, kiddies," the devil said. "Before you know it, we'll all be in hell together eating ice cream. Doesn't that sound like fun?"

"Hell no," Lonzo answered. "You know there ain't no ice cream in hell, bitch!"

"It's too hot," Randy pointed out.

"Duh!" Dino said, just having to add his little comment.

"And introducing the guest referee, 'The Legend Killer' Randy Orton!" Lillian yelled into the microphone.

"Oh shit," Taker said, realizing that now the decks were stacked against him. He looked at Orton. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"What?" Orton asked innocently. "I'm just trying to referee a match. Problem?"

"Let's just start this," the devil said. "I'm anxious to begin!"

"Go Taker!" the kids yelled. "We believe in you!"

Taker smiled affectionately at the kids, then lunged at the devil and knocked him down. He dominated during the entire match, throwing the devil around like he was a rag doll. The kids all cheered as Taker stood up and signaled for the chokeslam. He stood there waiting as the devil stumbled to his feet, and just as he was about to give him a chokeslam, the devil delivered a vicious low blow. Taker fell to his knees in complete agony, and the guest referee said absolutely nothing.

"That's not fair, assclown!" Keysia exclaimed, taking a word out of Y2J's vocabulary.

"What the hell kind of referee are you?" AJ asked Randy Orton.

"Jackass!" Lonzo called.

"Fucking cheater!" Randy felt compelled to say.

"Ass!" Dino added, frowning and folding his arms across his little chest.

The kids all yelled a string of obscenities to Randy Orton and the devil, but they were largely ignored. Orton decided not to say anything about the low blow, not to even acknowledge it. He just stood back smiling as the devil kicked Taker a couple of times to make him stay down, then climbed to the top of the turnbuckle.

"And now, I shall perform the 5 Star Devil Splash to Hell!" the devil said dramatically. "Prepare to be amazed!"

The kids all watched in horror as the devil prepared to do his finishing move on Taker. But he never did, because Randy Orton did the unexpected. He shook the ropes as hard as he could, and the devil fell, straddling the turnbuckle and probably permanently damaging his crotch in the process.

"Oh my, King! Did you see that?" J.R. yelled. "The devil! Randy Orton just messed up the devil's finishing move!"

"Yeah! The devil hurt his cock, the devil hurt his cock!" King sang happily. His eyes sparkled with laughter as he observed the devil, who was now writhing in pain on the floor of the ring.

Taker got to his feet and ran his hand through his loose hair, looking quizzically at Randy Orton. "What the hell did you do that for?" he asked.

Orton shrugged. "I'm The Legend Killer. I kill legends. It's what I do."

"I would say thanks, but you're still an ass in my book, boy," Taker said, then turned his back on him and turned his attention back to the devil.

The devil stumbled to his feet, holding his hands over his crotch. Tears were streaming down his face, hot, steaming tears. "I give up!" he cried, massaging his manhood. "I'm hurt! I give up!"

"You give up?" Taker asked in disbelief. The devil nodded. "Sorry, I don't like to end matches that way." He then proceeded to deliver one hell of a chokeslam to the devil that left him out cold. Taker covered him for the pin.

Randy Orton started to pound out an agonizingly slooooow three-count.

"Speed it up, fucker!" Lonzo yelled, and Orton glared at him before speeding up the count.

Randy Orton signaled for the bell. Taker got to his feet, and Orton raised his hand in victory.

"We knew you could do it!" Keysia yelled happily as the cell disappeared. The kids all jumped into the ring and ran over to him with outstretched arms.

"Oh no," Taker said, backing up. "No hugging, please! No! Nooooooo!"

The kids all ignored his pleas and hugged him hard. It was funny, really. Just a few hours before, they had been pelting him with toilet-water wet tampons, and now, here they were, hugging the stuffing out of him. It was quite a change of heart, and it was all because of the devil.

Speaking of the devil... He slowly made his way to his feet and leaned in the corner of the ring, trying to regain his composure. He glared at Taker and the excited kids, and couldn't help but roll his eyes in disgust at the affectionate display. "You all make me sick!" the devil exclaimed. "Especially you, Randy Orton!"

"Me? Oh, but Lucifer, whatever are you talking about?" Randy Orton asked innocently.

"We had a deal, you bitch!" the devil yelled. "You said, and I quote, 'I'm going help to kill a legend tonight!' So what the hell?"

"I did help kill a legend tonight... You," Orton explained. "Now, didn't this match have some special stipulations?"

"Yeah, yeah," the devil said. "I'm supposed to repair this messed up house and leave."

"That's right," Taker said. "So why don't you get to it?"

"Suddenly, I don't feel like doing it," the devil said with a fake yawn. "I'm not really obligated to keep my promises."

"Not obligated?" Keysia repeated unbelievingly. "Yes hell you are!"

"You don't even know what obligated means! None of you little brats know!" the devil exclaimed.

"The word obligated pertains to an obligation, and an obligation is like a duty, something that someone has to do," AJ said. The devil looked at him with wide eyes. "Yeah, beyatch, you didn't know I was so smart, did you?"

"So you know what obligated means. So what? That doesn't mean anything," the devil exclaimed. "And that doesn't mean that I have to fix this house!"

"What the bloody hell happened to my kitcheeeeeeeeeeeeeeen?" came a horrible cry from downstairs. Everyone got pale.

J. Marie was back...

New chapter coming up soon!