A/N- This is more of a filler chapter, sort of a let-down after the drama of the last chapter, but have patience. It will get better.

Disclaimer- The dialogue from this chapter, from the time Alia Leaps into Cynthia and onwards, does not belong to me. It belongs to Melanie Rawn, author of Knights of the Morningstar.

PippinDuck- Thank you! I'm glad I pulled it off- and here's some more!

TesubCalle- Thanks for all your wonderful comments! I got the idea there would be an endless cycle from Alia's line: "I can't kill all those people again…" Hope this is a quick enough update!

Korean Pearl- I'm glad you liked it, although most of the credit for the dialogue (Including the 'evil only exists because of good' line) goes to the wonderful writers of the TV show. And as to the end of the chapter, I'm sorry it confused you. The line that mattered was- "Maybe I could do one thing right, at least. I handed the gun to Sam." As soon as she gives up the gun and decides not to kill Sam, Lothos begins pulling her back to her own time and mentally torturing her, which is why the end is confusing. So no, she didn't kill Sam, at least not in the last chapter.

-------------------------------------------

Chapter 10- Knights of the Morningstar

Bound at every limb by my shackles of fear,

Sealed with lies through so many tears lost from within,

Pursuing the end, I fight for the chance to be lied to again.

You will never be strong enough.

You will never be good enough.

You were never conceived in love.
You will not rise above.

–Lies, by Evanescence

-------------------------------------------

I lost track of time. I was in and out of consciousness, never knowing if what I saw was another nightmare or reality. There wasn't any difference between them, anyway. My nightmares were real, and my reality was a nightmare.

Sometime in my delusions, I heard the terrifying voice of Lothos. I wept, afraid, despairing.

Alia.

I cried on.

Answer me, Alia.

"Yes?" I managed.

It is useless to resist, Alia. You failed me. You failed yourself. Do you see this?

"Yes!" I sobbed.

Sam Beckett is your enemy. But you failed to eliminate him.

"I…I'm sorry…"

You deserve to die for your failure.

I found myself believing him. Yes. I did deserve to die. I had failed Lothos! A small part of me wondered why I suddenly felt this loyalty, but it drifted to the back of my consciousness. I had failed. Lothos should kill me for being a failure.

But I will let you live. You may still be useful yet.

Live? I would live? Yes. Maybe I could make up for my failure. But I would have to give up my weak thoughts. I would have to harden myself again. But it wouldn't matter. And the pain that lived with me constantly would leave.

"Yes. I will obey now," I whispered.

Good. Very good.

---------------------------------------

"We found him."

I opened my eyes slowly, despairing of ever having a moment's peace. The past few weeks had been hard. I had to readjust to Leaping, and doing Lothos' dirty work. I did not want to speak to Zoey right now.

"What is it, Zoey?" I sighed.

"We found your good friend Dr. Beckett."

I gave the expected response. "He isn't my friend," I snapped. But my heart wavered.

"Whatever you say, sweet-cheeks, but we found him."

I knew there was more. "And?"

"He's leapt in to one Phillip Larkin. Some sort of a Knights of the Round Table geek, from the sound of it. He's at a yearly convention where several insane people gather to reenact the Middle Ages. Lothos believes he is there to bring Phillip and a woman named Cynthia together. Fortunately, the good Doctor has become very discouraged as of late. Your assignment is, once again, to eliminate him. You have a chance to redeem yourself. Don't blow it." She spun around on her heels and left me in the holding chamber, to dwell on this new information.

I shivered. Sam was back? No. I didn't want to do this. Please…I couldn't do this.

But you have to. Or…

Yes. That or. I would have to do it this time. I would have to destroy him, now; I couldn't afford to fail again. Not again.

So I would do my best this time. I would not fail now.

----------------------------------------

The red light left me, faded into nothingness around me, and there he was again. Sam. Cynthia's dress rustled against my legs, and I smiled. I dug my fingers into his arm and whispered, "Well, Sam Beckett. You're a difficult man to find."

I turned away from the stunned scientist to the other man and dropped the smile, pretending to be concerned. I remembered his name- Roger Franks. He and Phillip Larkin had been arguing over the rights to a book they wrote together and then altered. This was one reason Sam had Leaped in here. I was here to change that.

"The manuscript in your tent is mine," Roger was saying. "Phillip didn't write a single sentence of it."

I turned my gaze on Sam, who seemed paralyzed by the very sight of me. However amusing this was, I knew it wouldn't last. "What am I going to do?" I asked, appealing to Sam, Roger, and Lothos all at once. Yes, what was I going to do? What Cynthia wanted, what Roger wanted, what Sam wanted, or what Lothos wanted? Didn't I have any say in my life?

No. You gave up that say when you went with Zoey. And you know what you have to do.

"Either I wrote it or Phillip wrote it. It all depends on who you believe, doesn't it?" Roger asked.

"Yes," I said. "It certainly does." And that wasn't the truth. I knew what had happened, and I knew neither of them was telling the truth. But I couldn't let on.

Sam found his voice. "Roger…" But he was too disoriented to follow up on it.

"What?" Roger growled. Sam was still unable to say anything.

"What?" Now Roger was getting really impatient. "This isn't the tourney field, Phil, but it's still just you and me. Let's do it. Right here, right now."

"Don't be ridiculous!" I said. They couldn't break out in a fight right now. Sam couldn't handle a sword, but he could use his fists. And giving Sam an advantage wasn't something I had in mind.

I hitched up Cynthia's long skirts and called back to them, "Come with me, both of you!"

We headed toward the medieval banquet, both the men behind me bewildered. I took the moment to review where and when I was. It was July of 1987, and Roger, Cynthia, and Phillip were all part of a 'League' that pretended they lived in the middle ages. So what did knights in armor do what confronted with a dispute? They went to see the king.

I curtsied before the King, who raised his goblet and smiled welcome. "Lady Cyndaria! Escorted by two noble knights, no less! How fare you this evening, Lord Rannulf, Sir Percival?" Apparently these obsessed people even came up with Middle Ages titles.

Before Roger or Sam could say a thing, I said, "Your Majesties, pray forgive this untimely interruption, but I am convinced that this is a matter you alone can decide."

The king motioned to the Herald, who shouted and quieted the crowd, as the entertainers stopped their act. Now everyone's attention was fixed on us.

"What matter is this, my lady?" asked the king.

"Lord Rannulf and Sir Percival both claim ownership of the same item. Because there is no proof either way of the truth, I beg your wisdom in resolving the problem."

I was reminded of a similar situation in a story once, where two women claimed a baby as their own, and went to the king to settle the dispute. He ordered the child to be cut in half, and the woman who protested was known as the real mother. Thus the king showed his wisdom. But I believed a different situation would follow here.

"Lady Cyndaria," said the Queen, "You wish us to settle this matter of honor?"

I bent down humbly, trying to hide my smug smile. When Zoey told me the situation I would Leap into, it had taken some thought, but I had figured out the perfect scenario. And now it was all falling into place. "If your majesty would be so gracious, please."

I stepped back as the King and Queen began to question the two men as to what had happened and what they wanted to do about it. Both men were filled with righteous anger at having their ownership questioned, and finally Sam did just what I hoped he would do- challenged Roger to a duel over the rights of the book. Even better, Roger issued a counter-challenge for the right to woo me- Lady Cyndaria, I mean. And Sam accepted. This was going to be too easy. When Sam lost tomorrow on the tourney field, Roger would receive Cynthia and the rights to the book, and my job would be done. Although if I knew Zoey, she would come up with an even better plan to destroy these lives, or would at least brag that she could. But even if not, I would have finished the job.