Guilty by Association

Anakin Skywalker heard a prolonged sigh of relief from Leia during her third trip to the refresher. His legs were crossed as best as he could manage in the chair with his hands resting on his knees. His eyes were closed in meditation. He was not disturbed by Leia's sigh of relief, nor Han's snoring as he slept on the couch. He deliberately ignored the three children crowded around Han as they applied different things to their father's face. They stopped when they heard the refresher door slide open.

"Hurry up," Jaina whispered. "Let's go."

Big Anakin remained exactly as he was while Jaina, Jacen, and Little Anakin scrambled into the next room. They would not have reached their bedroom in time. They clutched their mother's cosmetics and hid behind the corner. Leia returned to the room and dropped herself next to Han.

"Where were we?" Leia asked in reference to a mind game she and Big Anakin had been playing through the night. At first, she did not notice anything different about her husband. The room was still lit only by the city lights outside the window.

Big Anakin didn't say anything nor make a move. All the same, Leia got a deliberately jumbled image in her mind, then jumped to her feet. "It's a Trade Federation droideka!" The image cleared as a sign that she got it right. "All right," she said as she sat again. "That's three for three."

She leaned towards Han to try to wake him again. She gasped and leaned back when she saw how colorful his face looked. Her eyes slowly rotated towards Big Anakin meditating in the chair. "Anakin," she growled suspiciously.

A head poked out from around the corner. "What?" Little Anakin asked. A tiny hand emerged from behind the corner and wrapped around Little Anakin's head. It covered his mouth as it pulled him back behind the corner.

Leia sighed and shook her head. "Anakin!" she called to the corner.

"What!" they both called back. Big Anakin opened his eyes and swung his arms around in exasperation.

Leia ignored him. "Anakin! Jaina! Jacen! Out here! Now!"

Her yelling caused Han to stir. He sat up and rubbed his eyes, which smeared his mascara. "Leia, why the hell are you yelling? Do you have any idea what time it is?" He looked at her with unfocused eyes. Black smears covered his temples. The blush was all over his nose as well as his cheeks. The lipstick was obviously applied with an inexperienced hand.

Leia avoided the urge to laugh, but the sight calmed her enough to think clearly. "Just go back to bed, Han. Trust me on this."

"Are you okay out here?"

Leia reached for her newly opened bottle. "Yes, I'm sure." She waved a hand to encourage him on. "Watch your step," she said as he walked past Big Anakin.

"Are you going to stay up all night?" he asked when he reached the other side of the room.

Leia waved her drink at him. "I really have no choice now." When he disappeared into the bedroom, Leia glanced back to where her children were hiding. "Come out, come out, wherever you are," she spoke with a commanding voice.

All three children emerged from around the corner. They kept their heads bowed as they shuffled into the living room and came to a stop on the other side of the table. Jacen's hand was still wrapped around Little Anakin's mouth.

"Well?" Leia asked. "Would any of you like to explain what happened to your father?"

At first, all three remained perfectly silent. Then Little Anakin pulled Jacen's hand away. "It was Grampa's idea."

Big Anakin gasped as if he were having a heart attack. "It wasn't!" Big Anakin insisted. "I had nothing to do with it. I swear!"

Leia shook her head. "Why am I not convinced?"

"I had nothing to do with it." Big Anakin took on a serious, almost psychotic, mien. "Why am I even explaining any of this to you like I'm one of your kids? I'm YOUR father!"

Leia wasn't impressed. "Where were you when they were abusing Han's face?"

"Oh," Big Anakin said. "I guess I backed into that one." He shrugged. "Oh well. How long do you intend to let him look like that? He'll ruin your sheets."

"I swear, was every Skywalker this insane? Is it some genetic quirk that skipped Luke and me?"

"Actually, yes."

Leia wasn't sure if he were joking. "These kids drive me to drink. I didn't think my own father would too." She took a sip from her bottle. "As for you three," she said to the children, "get your butts back to bed."

"But we can't sleep," Jaina whined. They seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

Leia glanced at her father. "Fine. It's the weekend with special circumstances. Knock yourselves out. But!" she said while raising her finger. "If any one of you gets into trouble, then you're all going back to bed. Understand?"

All three children nodded. Leia dismissed them with a wave of her hand. "This is your doing," she accused the apparition. "If you hadn't come along in the middle of the night, my kids would still be asleep and everything would be quiet."

"You're always blaming me for your problems."

"Well, if you'd behave every once in a while, I wouldn't have to."

"Where's the fun in that?" Big Anakin asked.

"You're supposed to be a Jedi Master," Leia said. "One with the Force. You should know better."

Big Anakin folded his arms. "I can't believe it. I'm being chastised by my own daughter."

Leia shrugged. "It could be worse," she said before taking another sip.

"I know," Big Anakin said. "I could be chastised by the one woman insane enough to have sex with me and give birth to my babies." A sudden epiphany came to Big Anakin. His finger shot out towards Leia. "That's where those crazy genes came from!"