Luke shot the ball and sent it sailing through the hoop. Matt ran after it and threw it back to his older brother.
L: Matt grab your book bag, it's time to go.
Matt: Just a few more shots.
L: No, it's getting dark, we have to eat and you need a bath tonight.
M: Aww man. OK. (Matt walked over to the grass and grabbed his bag and Lucas started walking towards him watching as his face lit up.) Look what I have. (Matt reached into his spiderman bag and pulled out a pile of papers and one by one he discarded the ones he didn't care about until he got to what he was looking for. He held it out to Lucas.) Here. (Lucas was busy trying to pick up all the dropped papers before they blew away not paying attention to what his brother was holding. Instead he started opening an envelope.)
L: What's this Matty?
M: (The little boy was looking at the ground and kicking the grass.) Nothing.
L: (Lucas looked at the much shorter person in front of him with a raised eyebrow.) "Nothing" with you you ALWAYS means "something". (He unfolded the paper and started reading.) MATT! This is from your teacher and she wants to have a meeting with mom tomorrow morning.
M: I know. I'm sorry Lucas.
L: (Yelling.) Don't you think you should have told me about this sooner? Like Friday? It's Sunday night!
M: But you wouldn't have brought me to the park if you knew I got in trouble at school.
L: (Still yelling.) YOU ARE DAMN RIGHT I WOULDN'T HAVE!
M: (Starting to get tears in his eyes.) Don't be mad at me Lucas.
L: (Lucas hated to yell at his little brother, but he hated it more now that he had him crying. He sat down on the grass and watched Matt use his hand to wipe away the tears. The sun was almost down and since it was early spring, it was still a little cold. Lucas pulled his hoodie out of his bag.) Come here. (The little boy walked over and let Lucas put the sweatshirt on him. It was huge and the length went past his knees, but Matt didn't mind, it was a sign of a peace offering. The older boy patted the grass next to him.) Sit. (He followed orders.) Why did you pull the little girls hair?
M: Because you told me that I could not "HIT" girls.
L: (If the 16year-old wasn't so worried about how he was going to deal with this problem, he would have laughed at that comment.) You can't pull their hair either, and I think you know that.
M: But she made me mad.
L: How?
M: She laughed at me because I wore the same shirt 2 days in a row. She said that it was dirty. Luke, I tried to find a clean one that day, but...
L: ...but I didn't do the laundry. (Lucas shook his head and laid back on the grass. He felt so bad. He had a huge History mid-term to study for on Thursday night and did not get the clothes washed. He was the reason his little brother got made fun of.) I'm sorry.
M: (Laying back and copying his big brother in every action.) That's OK, it was my Spider man shirt and it's my favorite.
L: (Smiling.) I know, but that does not mean that you can wear it everyday.
M: She told me that Spiderman was for babies too. I am almost 6 Lucas, I am not a baby.
L: No you aren't, but I think that you need to stay away from this...
M: ...Sarah.
L: ...stay away from this Sarah girl. You can't be getting into trouble at school Matt. You know that.
M: Are you mad at me?
L: No. (He sat back up and so did the little boy. He had to figure out what he was going to do about this. When he looked down he saw the paper that his little brother wanted to show him earlier.) So what is it? (Lucas was pointing to the picture that was on the front.)
M: (Getting a smile on his face.) It's you playing basketball.
L: Wow! It's really good. (Lucas took the paper and unfolded it. It said "happy birthday" on the inside.) How did you know?
M: Mommy told me this morning when you were in the shower.
(Lucas had to look away. He felt the tears threaten and did not want his little brother to notice. The next day he would be seventeen and the last time that his mom remembered his birthday was when he turned 12. She got him a cake. That is the last good memory of her that he had since she started drinking so bad again. There would be mornings here and there that she would hug him before she went to work and promise him that things would be different, but every night he came home to the same thing: both his parents passed out. He had to give her credit, when she found out that she was pregnant, she was sober for almost 2 years. He still does not know what happened to make her relapse and at this point he really didn't care or have time to think about it. He was too busy raising his little brother.
He remembered the year that he was 12. His dad was still his abusive, drunken self. Baby or no baby, that man was not going to give up his alcohol. Lucas had it counted down to the number of "days" until he graduated high school and he was out of that town and that house forever. He was on a basketball team and he was the star, there was not question there. Between his ability on the court and his grades, he would go to school on a full ride. But then his mom just couldn't handle dealing with life he guessed and picked up a can of beer after another fight with his dad and listening to a screaming baby all day and that was that. Lucas still had every intention of leaving, but now it would take him a little longer. There was not basketball anymore because he had to quit that when he was put in charge of picking up Matt everyday from school. Each day Lucas took on a little more responsiblity and after 5 long years he could make the best grilled cheese on the planet, but could not score above a 70 percent on a test. With his hopes of a university out of the question, Lucas focused on survival. He took each day as it came and knew that one day he would get out of there, but now it would have to be with Matty. That had become his life.
M: Lucas?
L: (Coming back to reality.) What?
M: I'm getting hungry, can we go?
L: (Getting up and pulling the 6 year old to his feet at the same time.) Yeah, let's go. (He took his hand.)
M: Do we have to tell mommy that I got in trouble at school?
L: Yeah we do. Your teacher wants to see her.
M: (Whispering as if their dad was standing within earshot.) But what if she tells Daddy? (Starting to whimper.) He scares me when he is mad.
L: (Squeezing his hand tighter.) You let me take care of Dad OK?
M: (Outright crying.) Let's not go home Lucas. Please?
L: We have to Matty, there is no place else to go and it is getting cold.
M: But he might hit you again.
L: (The tears started to fall for him too.) Matty, that has not happened in a long time.
M: But you were bleeding.
L: (Stopping, Luke pulled the child into a tight hug.) Listen buddy, that will never happen again and I promise that he will never touch you either. Do you remember what you promised me?
M: (Taking a deep breath.) Not to tell anyone. And I haven't Lucas. I haven't.
L: Just make sure that you don't, OK? It's going to be OK. (He got back up and started walking home in silence. Truth be told Lucas was scared to death. He didn't think that his dad would ever try to hit him again after that night less then a year ago. His dad could hit him all that he wanted, but Lucas was not about to stand and watch anyone hurt his little brother. Dear dad got a taste of his own medicine that night. It was the last night that either of them had laid a hand on anyone, but it was also the last night that either of them had said a word to each other. His parents were creatures of habit: Go to work, come home from work, get drunk and pass out. As long as the routine was followed, everything was fine. If something threatened to disrupt a normal day, it could mean potential disaster. Lucas took care of everything with Matty, but there was one thing that he could not do and that was a parent/teacher conference. This one little thing could put an end to the peace in the household. He went over every possible scenario in his head as he walked and then he was brought out of his thoughts by his little brother's voice.)
M: (Pointing in front of him.) Lucas, look at all the fire trucks. Can we stop and look at them before we go home?
(Lucas just kept walking. He did not need to answer because he could tell that soon Matty was going to be up close and personal with them. They were parked in front of their house. Lucas kept a tight grip on his brother's hand as they approached the people that were surrounding what was left of his home. He heard a voice next to him.)
Fireman: Hey kid, you need to back up.
L: (Still looking at the smoking remains in front of him.) This is my house. Where are my...
Fireman: ...this is your house? We have been looking for you two.
L: Our parents, where are they?
Fireman: (Putting a hand on his shoulder.) There is a really nice lady over here that I need you to talk to...
L: (Raising his voice.) Just tell me where my parents are. I don't want to talk to some "really nice lady". Where the hell is my mom? (A lady came up behind them.)
Social worker: (Holding out her hand.) I'm Stacey.
L: (Lucas just looked at her hand out waiting for him to shake it. He just kept staring at it as if there was no arm that it was connected to it.) What?
S: (Pulling her hand back.) I am Stacey and I'm...
L: I don't care who you are unless you can tell me where I can find my parents. Are they at the hospital?
S: (Looking at the two helpless kids in front of her she realized that she had no idea what to say. This was her first case. She had shadowed many social workers over the years, but that night she was solo. She was about to tell two kids that they were now orphanes.) You are Lucas?
L: Yes! (Lucas could tell by the look in this strangers eyes, the pity that she was feeling for them, that the worst had happened. They were gone. Lucas and Matt had not had the best life or the best parents, but they were still their family. That was their life. Lucas had the strangest thought at that point: Why couldn't he cry?) Are my parents dead?
(Stacey looked at the two kids who were waiting for her response and she shook her head yes as the tears rolled down her cheeks.)
L: Matt grab your book bag, it's time to go.
Matt: Just a few more shots.
L: No, it's getting dark, we have to eat and you need a bath tonight.
M: Aww man. OK. (Matt walked over to the grass and grabbed his bag and Lucas started walking towards him watching as his face lit up.) Look what I have. (Matt reached into his spiderman bag and pulled out a pile of papers and one by one he discarded the ones he didn't care about until he got to what he was looking for. He held it out to Lucas.) Here. (Lucas was busy trying to pick up all the dropped papers before they blew away not paying attention to what his brother was holding. Instead he started opening an envelope.)
L: What's this Matty?
M: (The little boy was looking at the ground and kicking the grass.) Nothing.
L: (Lucas looked at the much shorter person in front of him with a raised eyebrow.) "Nothing" with you you ALWAYS means "something". (He unfolded the paper and started reading.) MATT! This is from your teacher and she wants to have a meeting with mom tomorrow morning.
M: I know. I'm sorry Lucas.
L: (Yelling.) Don't you think you should have told me about this sooner? Like Friday? It's Sunday night!
M: But you wouldn't have brought me to the park if you knew I got in trouble at school.
L: (Still yelling.) YOU ARE DAMN RIGHT I WOULDN'T HAVE!
M: (Starting to get tears in his eyes.) Don't be mad at me Lucas.
L: (Lucas hated to yell at his little brother, but he hated it more now that he had him crying. He sat down on the grass and watched Matt use his hand to wipe away the tears. The sun was almost down and since it was early spring, it was still a little cold. Lucas pulled his hoodie out of his bag.) Come here. (The little boy walked over and let Lucas put the sweatshirt on him. It was huge and the length went past his knees, but Matt didn't mind, it was a sign of a peace offering. The older boy patted the grass next to him.) Sit. (He followed orders.) Why did you pull the little girls hair?
M: Because you told me that I could not "HIT" girls.
L: (If the 16year-old wasn't so worried about how he was going to deal with this problem, he would have laughed at that comment.) You can't pull their hair either, and I think you know that.
M: But she made me mad.
L: How?
M: She laughed at me because I wore the same shirt 2 days in a row. She said that it was dirty. Luke, I tried to find a clean one that day, but...
L: ...but I didn't do the laundry. (Lucas shook his head and laid back on the grass. He felt so bad. He had a huge History mid-term to study for on Thursday night and did not get the clothes washed. He was the reason his little brother got made fun of.) I'm sorry.
M: (Laying back and copying his big brother in every action.) That's OK, it was my Spider man shirt and it's my favorite.
L: (Smiling.) I know, but that does not mean that you can wear it everyday.
M: She told me that Spiderman was for babies too. I am almost 6 Lucas, I am not a baby.
L: No you aren't, but I think that you need to stay away from this...
M: ...Sarah.
L: ...stay away from this Sarah girl. You can't be getting into trouble at school Matt. You know that.
M: Are you mad at me?
L: No. (He sat back up and so did the little boy. He had to figure out what he was going to do about this. When he looked down he saw the paper that his little brother wanted to show him earlier.) So what is it? (Lucas was pointing to the picture that was on the front.)
M: (Getting a smile on his face.) It's you playing basketball.
L: Wow! It's really good. (Lucas took the paper and unfolded it. It said "happy birthday" on the inside.) How did you know?
M: Mommy told me this morning when you were in the shower.
(Lucas had to look away. He felt the tears threaten and did not want his little brother to notice. The next day he would be seventeen and the last time that his mom remembered his birthday was when he turned 12. She got him a cake. That is the last good memory of her that he had since she started drinking so bad again. There would be mornings here and there that she would hug him before she went to work and promise him that things would be different, but every night he came home to the same thing: both his parents passed out. He had to give her credit, when she found out that she was pregnant, she was sober for almost 2 years. He still does not know what happened to make her relapse and at this point he really didn't care or have time to think about it. He was too busy raising his little brother.
He remembered the year that he was 12. His dad was still his abusive, drunken self. Baby or no baby, that man was not going to give up his alcohol. Lucas had it counted down to the number of "days" until he graduated high school and he was out of that town and that house forever. He was on a basketball team and he was the star, there was not question there. Between his ability on the court and his grades, he would go to school on a full ride. But then his mom just couldn't handle dealing with life he guessed and picked up a can of beer after another fight with his dad and listening to a screaming baby all day and that was that. Lucas still had every intention of leaving, but now it would take him a little longer. There was not basketball anymore because he had to quit that when he was put in charge of picking up Matt everyday from school. Each day Lucas took on a little more responsiblity and after 5 long years he could make the best grilled cheese on the planet, but could not score above a 70 percent on a test. With his hopes of a university out of the question, Lucas focused on survival. He took each day as it came and knew that one day he would get out of there, but now it would have to be with Matty. That had become his life.
M: Lucas?
L: (Coming back to reality.) What?
M: I'm getting hungry, can we go?
L: (Getting up and pulling the 6 year old to his feet at the same time.) Yeah, let's go. (He took his hand.)
M: Do we have to tell mommy that I got in trouble at school?
L: Yeah we do. Your teacher wants to see her.
M: (Whispering as if their dad was standing within earshot.) But what if she tells Daddy? (Starting to whimper.) He scares me when he is mad.
L: (Squeezing his hand tighter.) You let me take care of Dad OK?
M: (Outright crying.) Let's not go home Lucas. Please?
L: We have to Matty, there is no place else to go and it is getting cold.
M: But he might hit you again.
L: (The tears started to fall for him too.) Matty, that has not happened in a long time.
M: But you were bleeding.
L: (Stopping, Luke pulled the child into a tight hug.) Listen buddy, that will never happen again and I promise that he will never touch you either. Do you remember what you promised me?
M: (Taking a deep breath.) Not to tell anyone. And I haven't Lucas. I haven't.
L: Just make sure that you don't, OK? It's going to be OK. (He got back up and started walking home in silence. Truth be told Lucas was scared to death. He didn't think that his dad would ever try to hit him again after that night less then a year ago. His dad could hit him all that he wanted, but Lucas was not about to stand and watch anyone hurt his little brother. Dear dad got a taste of his own medicine that night. It was the last night that either of them had laid a hand on anyone, but it was also the last night that either of them had said a word to each other. His parents were creatures of habit: Go to work, come home from work, get drunk and pass out. As long as the routine was followed, everything was fine. If something threatened to disrupt a normal day, it could mean potential disaster. Lucas took care of everything with Matty, but there was one thing that he could not do and that was a parent/teacher conference. This one little thing could put an end to the peace in the household. He went over every possible scenario in his head as he walked and then he was brought out of his thoughts by his little brother's voice.)
M: (Pointing in front of him.) Lucas, look at all the fire trucks. Can we stop and look at them before we go home?
(Lucas just kept walking. He did not need to answer because he could tell that soon Matty was going to be up close and personal with them. They were parked in front of their house. Lucas kept a tight grip on his brother's hand as they approached the people that were surrounding what was left of his home. He heard a voice next to him.)
Fireman: Hey kid, you need to back up.
L: (Still looking at the smoking remains in front of him.) This is my house. Where are my...
Fireman: ...this is your house? We have been looking for you two.
L: Our parents, where are they?
Fireman: (Putting a hand on his shoulder.) There is a really nice lady over here that I need you to talk to...
L: (Raising his voice.) Just tell me where my parents are. I don't want to talk to some "really nice lady". Where the hell is my mom? (A lady came up behind them.)
Social worker: (Holding out her hand.) I'm Stacey.
L: (Lucas just looked at her hand out waiting for him to shake it. He just kept staring at it as if there was no arm that it was connected to it.) What?
S: (Pulling her hand back.) I am Stacey and I'm...
L: I don't care who you are unless you can tell me where I can find my parents. Are they at the hospital?
S: (Looking at the two helpless kids in front of her she realized that she had no idea what to say. This was her first case. She had shadowed many social workers over the years, but that night she was solo. She was about to tell two kids that they were now orphanes.) You are Lucas?
L: Yes! (Lucas could tell by the look in this strangers eyes, the pity that she was feeling for them, that the worst had happened. They were gone. Lucas and Matt had not had the best life or the best parents, but they were still their family. That was their life. Lucas had the strangest thought at that point: Why couldn't he cry?) Are my parents dead?
(Stacey looked at the two kids who were waiting for her response and she shook her head yes as the tears rolled down her cheeks.)