Yes! Yes! Yes! I did it! I finally did it! Hmm, maybe added stress is a good thing? Anyway, I've been trying to finish this one for a while, simply so that I didn't have five stories on the go...yeah, because getting rid of one is such an improvement...anyway, and plus I really wanted to finish this, because I quite like it! So yeah, it's done, all happy happy joy joy, and now I'm gonna go attempt Fools Rush In and/or Smoke and Mirrors...or maybe my assignment? But that's not fun! So please read and review and I love you! Oh, if Chan seems a bit...mean in this...who cares! He does have a dark side, after all AWOOHOO!

I do not own friends/actors/characters/weird al, but I do own a case of the hungry belly! I need food!

A peaceful calm had fallen over the apartment, getting a much needed break from the commotion that endlessly took place. In the distance, you could head bird chirping happily, making their joy well known. Cars drove past, but their noise was a welcome one too.

Footsteps bounded up the stairs, accompanied by wild shrieks, and Phoebe burst through the door.

"You aren't getting it Chandler!"

"You…can run…really fast," Chandler panted, stumbling into the apartment. Phoebe grinned widely, stepping behind the dining table.

"You are really out of shape Chandler."

"What are you talking about? I go to the gym…never…" Chandler trailed off, a thoughtful look covering his face. It cleared after a moment, and he looked at Phoebe dangerously. "Now, back to me getting in your pants."

"Nuh uh, I swore to myself a long time ago that none of you buys would ever get your hands down there…well, except Joey…and Ross."

"Hey!"

"I'm kidding!"

"Well, I'm not…now come here!" Chandler took off after Phoebe again, his short pause all the rest he had needed. Phoebe's eyes widened at the sight of her friend running at her once more, and in a split second call, she leapt for the couch. Chandler watched as the blonde miscalculated the distance and went flying over the couch, then shrugged and dived over as well, rolling on top of her.

"Oof! Chandler…you definitely need to go to the gym…I can't breathe!" Phoebe exclaimed. Chandler grinned and reached down to get his wallet, but let out a cry as Phoebe bit him on the shoulder.

"Ow! You little…hey! Stop it! Pheebs!" Chandler rolled off as Phoebe continued to bite him, then glared at her as he recovered.

"If you get to play rough, then so do I!" Phoebe laughed, quickly jumping to her feet and heading for the doorway. "I'm gonna go flush it!"

"In my toilet?" Chandler asked, still on the floor.

"Yes!"

"Ha! That toilet won't flush! Joey clogged it this morning!"

Phoebe paused, her face twisting into that of a disgusted look. While she was contemplating what to do, Chandler had made his way to his feet. Before she could blink, Phoebe had once more found herself on the ground, with Chandler on top.

"Ooh, you mean…boy!" she screamed, struggling wildly beneath him.

"Why do girls always seem to fight me when I try to get into their pants?" Chandler wondered as he grabbed Phoebe's wrists with one hand; his other hand reaching down to where his wallet still lived. Phoebe let out a cry, then tried to bite him once more, but Chandler knew to dodge her mouth this time. "Too slick for you Pheebs!"

"Hey! Not the button…ooh!" Chandler smiled in victory, Phoebe's jeans finally undone. She let out a giggle as his hand snaked down, searching for the wallet.

"Where the hell…"

"Keep searching…I'm actually starting to enjoy this."

Chandler stopped and gave Phoebe an odd look. Before he could speak, the door opened and their friends walked in.

"Oh my…" Rachel gasped while everyone else gaped at the scene in front of them. Chandler and Phoebe glanced at one another, then down at her crotch, then up to where he had her arms pinned down. They glanced back at one another then up at the group, both letting out a laugh.

"This…this isn't…"

"What it looks like," Phoebe finished for Chandler. Monica raised an eyebrow.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah…we were just…this isn't what it looks like!"

"Chandler, you have your hand down her pants!" Ross exclaimed. Chandler quickly yanked his hand up, blushing slightly.

"And you still have Phoebe pinned to the ground," Rachel reminded him after a beat.

"Right!" Chandler quickly climbed off of Phoebe and stood to his feet, then leaned down to help her up. They stood side by side, both grinning shamefully at the group.

"Pheebs…your pants…" Phoebe frowned at Ross for a moment, and then glanced down.

"Oh yeah!" she quickly did her pants up, then turned to Chandler. "I forgot you had managed to undo them…you're very nimble with your fingers!"

"Dude!" Joey grinned at Chandler, looking mighty proud of his friend. Chandler rolled his eyes.

"I guess…you guys are curious as to why…Pheebs and I were doing that…"

"Well, I think it speaks pretty clearly for itself!" Monica exclaimed, causing Phoebe to smirk.

"Does it Monica?"

"Uh…ya!"

"Okay, here's the deal…Phoebe and I weren't about to conduct the physical act of love, nor was I taking advantage of her…I was simply just getting my wallet back."

"Your wallet?" Ross seemed unsure, so Chandler glanced at Phoebe desperately.

"I don't know what he's talking about…all I know is that, one minute I was trying to go find you guys, and the next minute, he had me pinned to the ground!"

"Chandler!" Rachel scolded. Chandler glared at Phoebe, who managed to hide her smile behind the distressed look.

"I did not! Look, she has my wallet! Here, I'll prove it to you!" Chandler reached out a hand towards Phoebe's crotch, but was stopped by Ross grabbing his arm.

"Hey, hey, hey!"

"What? You don't actually believe her, do you?"

When the group didn't answer, Chandler rolled his eyes once more, then sent another desperate look Phoebe's way. She sighed.

"Okay, fine, I have his wallet down my pants, whatever."

"You do?"

"Yes Ross, I do!"

"Thankyou! Now can I have it back?"

Phoebe glanced at Chandler's outstretched hand for a moment, then rolled her eyes and reached into the back of her pants and pulled the wallet out. "Here."

"…I thought it was down the front of your pants?"

"Yeah, I moved it while you weren't looking," Phoebe laughed. Chandler paused, then nodded slowly.

"No wonder I couldn't find it."

"Hey, you could have kept looking, I wasn't really complaining after a while." She winked at Chandler, causing Ross to roll his eyes.

"Can someone please explain what is going on here? Pheebs, why did you have Chandler's wallet down your pants?"

"Yeah Pheebs, why did you have my wallet down your pants?" Chandler repeated, smiling deviously at Phoebe. She shifted uncomfortably, not liking the way everyone was looking at her.

"Because…I took it so that Chandler wouldn't be able to buy…something…"

"And what was that something?" Chandler urged, looking like he should have been dancing on the roof.

"Well, it wasn't a CD, I'll tell you that!" she let out a nervous laugh, to which Rachel cocked her head at. "Okay fine! It was the Weird Al CD! I lied! Chandler was right, I didn't write that song, Weird Al did! Are you happy now? Are you? You've ruined me!"

"You mean…Chandler wasn't lying?" Joey asked after a moment.

"This is the best moment of my life…I'm right and I got to feel up Phoebe…life is great!"

"Okay, calm down Chandler…Pheebs, why did you do that?"

"Because Rach…I forgot! I'm sorry!" she stomped over to the table childishly and sat down, dramatically hiding her face in her arms.

"Well…this is unexpected," Monica said a moment later. Chandler cleared his throat, then bent over to whisper in Phoebe's ear.

"By the way, you owe me 465 dollars," Phoebe jerked up and gave him a cold glare, causing Chandler to back away. "Okay, maybe not! Jeez!"

"Hey guys!" Phoebe said, walking into the apartment. She set her guitar down on the table, and walked over to the couch. "What's up? You aren't watching any TV or…anything!"

"We were waiting for you Pheebs," Joey said, looking at her oddly. Phoebe grinned.

"Oh, thanks! Yay, I feel important!" she sat down next to Ross and reached for a handful of potato chips.

"Uh…Pheebs?" Rachel said a moment later.

"What?"

"We're still waiting."

"What? I'm already here!"

"Phoebe, we're waiting for the song you promised…four days ago…you know, after Chandler had his hands down your pants," Rachel reminded her. Phoebe choked on the chip that was in her mouth, then swallowed nervously.

"Oh…that…yeah, I know! I was just getting something to eat first…I'll get my guitar!" she stood up and made her way over to the table, muttering to herself.

She was so screwed. How could she have forgotten after that? How could she have forgotten about the one way that she could redeem herself musically in their eyes?

"For the record…it was only one hand Rach," Chandler said as Phoebe made her way back over, guitar in shaking hand.

"Dude, why are you trying to correct her? It sounds better her way!" Joey exclaimed.

"Okay, shh!" Phoebe sat down on the table, guitar in hands. What was she going to do? She couldn't tell them that she hadn't written anything again, that was stupid. She was going to have to do the same as last time, except with a different song. Chandler couldn't know all the songs.

"Okay Pheebs! Come on, let's hear it!" Chandler clapped his hands together, looking at Phoebe expectantly, a glint in his eye. Phoebe swallowed again, feeling as if she was about to implode.

"O-Okay…here we go!"

"This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
Couldn't think of any lyrics
No I never wrote the lyrics
So I'll just sing any old lyrics
That come to mind, child
You really need words
Whole lotta rhyming words
You gotta rhyme so many words, mm-mm
To do it, to do it, to do it, to do it
To do it, to do it right, child
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
I know that you're probably sore
'Cause I didn't write any more
I just didn't get to complete it
So that's why I gotta repeat it
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
Oh I make a lotta money
They pay me a ton of money
They're payin' me plenty of money
To sing this song, child
I gotta fill time
Three minutes worth of time
Oh, how will I fill so much time, mm-mm
I'll throw in a solo, a solo, a solo
A solo, a solo here
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song is just six words long
This song's got nothin' to say
But I'm recording it anyway
I know if I put my mind to it
I know I could find a good rhyme here
Oh, you gotta have-a music
You need really catchy music
This song has got plenty of music
But just six words, child
And so I'll sing' em over
And over and over and over
And over and over and over, mm-mm
And over and over and over
And over and over and over again
Six words long, six words long
Six words long, six words long
Six words long, six words long
This song is just six words long
It's just six words long."

She finished with a flourish, then glanced up at the group expectantly. They all stared back at her.

"You couldn't even pick a song from a different artist?" Chandler exclaimed after a long silence, shaking his head at her. Phoebe's throat tightened.

"W-What…what are you talking about? I-I wrote that…he's lying again people!"

"I never lied in the first place!"

"Well, you're lying now! You're just jealous of me! He's just jealous of me! And he's a lying, no good, liar!"

"Pheebs…" Monica stood up and made her way into her bedroom. She came out a moment later, holding a CD up for all to see. Crap, Phoebe thought, looking at the Weird Al CD.

"What? That's just a CD."

"Phoebe, the song you just sang is on here!"

"It is? Let me see that!" Phoebe grabbed the CD and looked at it, then let out a gasp. "Oh! The nerve! This guy stole my song!"

"Phoebe…"

"Okay, fine, I panicked! I forgot again! You guys…you suck!" Phoebe stood up and threw the CD to the ground, then stomped over to the door. The group watched the door shut behind her, then turned to face each other.

"Wow," Joey muttered, leaning back in the chair.

"Yeah," Ross agreed.

"Totally," Rachel murmured. Monica sat down next to Chandler, patting him on the leg.

"Oh, by the way, thanks for buying me this CD." Chandler smirked at her, then switched on the TV, leaning back into the couch.

"It was my pleasure…believe me."