Disclaimer: oh c'mon you people already know I don't own final fantasy LOL !

Zell was nervous. He honestly couldn't remember a time that nervousness hindered him so much that he worried about leaving dorm.

" Oh c'mon its just the weekend… with Fujin around campus…" Zell said slowly as he turned and saw the hospital robe that was lying on the chair next to the table. He sighed and slapped his head in stupidity.

" Who am I kidding that woman has me wrapped around her finger and she doesn't even know!" Zell closed his eyes and looked into the dful obdy mirror next to the wall on his left. He then examined what he was wearing.

His usual attire was gone, replaced with a long sleeve white button dress shirt, left open to reveal a white t-shirt. He had on blue jeans that were slightly faded at the thigh, starting at blue then to a mixture of both white and blue in the middle. He was wearing brand new white sneakers that he had been saving for a good occasion. He smiled at the reflection nervously and said as he opened the front door, headed to breakfast,

" here's nothing!"

Fujin was deep in thought, as she thought about what Zell had done for her last night, everything that happened in that moment committed to memory. She picked at her scrambled eggs wioth ketchup as Zell's words echoed in mind.

" Can I be there for you?"

Fujin shook her head, her hair going into her eye. She blew it away and knitted her eyebrows in silent annoyance. She needed to get her hair cut; seeing as it could be a liability in battle. She then saw squall and Rinoa come into the cafeteria and she watched them cautiously, her eye not focused on them. Rinoa giggled as squall said something silent in her ear, and she held his ungloved hand as he held her from behind. Fujin just closed her eye and put the forkful of eggs in her moth and ate quietly. She watched two girls pass by her and heard them talking as they sat behind her.

" Hyne! Did you see Zell today?" The first girl said as she put her bookbag down.

" Did I? he looked absolutely gorgeous today. Its such a shame that he doesn't talk to me. I'd shackle him to my bedroom!" the other girl said as she put down her binder, talking back to the other girl.

Fujin instinctively grabbed her fork tightly in order not to do something to the two airheads behind her. It was then that she looked up at the cafeteria entrance and saw Zell.

" Hyne…" she said in her mind as she saw what he had on. Zell had on a white short sleeve dress shirt, left open to reveal a white t-shirt, and a pair of blue jeans with design fades, and his hair in it's usual style. White sneakers finished his outfit and she slowly swallowed as she saw his eyes meet hers. Fujin panicked slightly as she saw him slowly walk towards her, his smile making her heart flutter.

"not fair…" Fujin said to herself as she saw him stop in front of her table. Zell touched the back of his neck with his left hand and said with a tentative voice,

"uh… hey Fujin… can I sit down with you…" Fujin slowly got her wits together and nodded, and watched him sit down, her eyes never leaving him.

"Oh poor baby he's sitting down with the Ice queen…" one of the girls said, not knowing that Fujin heard them. She scowled and said taking her anger out on Zell. Zell quickly responded with a hesitant,

" I just want to be your friend Fujin… nothing else…" Fujin was saddened by the words that came form Zell. But she quickly reprimanded her heart.

" It wasn't like I wanted a relationship now was I?" Fujin said in her head as she nodded and said to Zell,

"OKAY…" Zell closed his eyes and looked relieved as he sat down more comfortably in the chair in front of Fujin. There was an uncomfortable silence coming from their table as they ate in relative silence, and when they were done, Zell took both of their trays to the disposal and when he came back, he offered a hand to Fujin to heklpo her get up, but was met with a nod and her saying as she walked ahead of him,

" NOT OLD…" Zell just sighed in relief and said mentally to himself as he watched her walk away,

"thanks Fujin, for pushing me back into reality. Though I don't know how long I can holf my feelings back…" and followed her out of the cafeteria.

Fujin felt Zell following her to the quad of the garden, and she said before,

"WHAT!..." Zell jumped at her voice and said softly, putting his hands in his pockets,

" well I was hoping that well… you know… could help me with something?" Fujin watched the blush creep up on his face and was flattered at the sight but that didn't mean that her heart would gain coinrtol of her actions like the night before.

"WHAT!" Fujin said plainly. Zell just nodded slightly and said,

"Well… I would like you to teach me how to dance…" "Fujin's eye widened slightly at the realization that he knew she knew how to dance.

" HOW KNOW?" Fujin said, her eye burning a hole in Zell's head. Zell continued by saying,

" well I happen to walk by when you were giving lessons to squall for his and Rinoa's anniversary date…" Fujin felt her face go slightly red at the thought. Caught.

Fujin rolled her eye and said exasperated,

"FINE…" Zell just smiled, making Fujin's heart jump.

"WHEN START?" Fujin said crossing her arms, praying to all the gods above that Zell couldn't see thorugh her smokescreen of emotions and see wqhat she was really like. Zell on the other hand, was bust thinking about what time to do it. He smiled and said to her,

"How about later today, say just about sunset at the grass field by the quad…" Fujin nodded and watched him run away, his face smiling non stop. Fujin exhaled in relief and continued going her own way, glad that Zell was not following her all day today, though as nice as that would seem.

She opened the font door to her dorm, the familiar scent of baby powder making her nerves relax. Fujin took her shoes and walked along the carpet on her feet, making her way towards the fridge. She took out a small bottle of a florescent blue liquid and she eyed it as she slowly made her way towards the couch. She took off her blue hood, leaving her in nothing but a blue camisole. She popped the cork of the botole off of the top of the bottle and she swirled the contentd of the bottle by swinging the bottle while holgding the top of the bottle by her fingertips. When the liquid shined even bright she smiled as she looked at it again, admiring the liquid's beauty.

" my one comfort…" Fujin said to herself as she downed the liquid, her eyes instantly falling asleep, the bottle hitting the floor as she fell onto her pillow, her silver hair hiding her face slightly.

Nida came in a few minutes later to see her friend sleep ing on the couch, the pillow unser her head, and a sleeping potion lying limp in her hands. Nida looked at her friend worriedly as she grbbed the bottlew and put it on the coffee table, and pulled a blanket on top of her roommate, touching the tiop of her head.

"must be hard to only get sleep by an aid…" nida said as she drew the blinds, making the room a little less bright for her sleeping friend.

FUJIN'S DREAM

Fujin was in the middle of a meadow that she visited often, her young face and eyes staring into the moon that held dominion over the entire night.

"Fujin…" a young man said as he was behind her. Fujin turned around. Her pale skin having slight goosebumps due to the sudden chill wind that passed. She looked into the obsidian eyes of her boyfriend and smiled as she ran upto him and threw herself on him, loving the height he had due to the fact he was two years older than her, kissing his cheek while still having her arm,s wrapped around her neck. She looked up at him and saw that he looked kind of different, Fujin couldn't put her finger on it, but something was hiding behind his eyes, something that Fujin couldn't put a finger on. She then saw that his hands were traveling up her sides, and she instantly embraced the feelings. But when his hands grabbed both of her breasts, she instantly steeled herself and pushed back away from him.

"what are you doing?" Fujin saidina teenagers voice, her face etched with surprise. The young man just shrugged and said to her,

" it's time that we stop polaying this young virgin shit don't you think Fuu?" Fujin shook her head and realized how stupid, how naïve she ws for believeing in him. She finally realized why he had a relationship with her. And it made her sick to her stomach. She then saw him dive for her but she didn't move fast enough. He fell on top of her, and she struggled against his weight. She felt something hard press against her thight and she was revolted at it. She then fought harder when she felt him go for her hands, poutting them above her head and holding them there, holding her with his weight. She felt her eyes sting with uinshed tears as she continued to fight but was unsuccessful she felt a hot tear slide down her cheek as she felt a cold butterfly knife touch her heated skin.

"don't worry about Fujin… I'll makle it fun for the both of us…" Fujin just spit in the boy's face in defiance, and continued to struggle, only to be slapped by him.

"Richard please stop this…" Fujin said desparately as she was slowly losing her stamina, and the side of her face swell up due to the hit.

"Not until I've had my fill of you Bitch…" Fujin then felt his balde cut her shirt and she panicked, launcxhing her knee right into the boy's crotch, making the boy roll off her in an instant. Fujin Then got up and tried to run, but before she go on her two feet, Richard swung his knife at her, missing her, but not missing her eye. Fujin screamed as the blade's effects had finally kicked in, her eye closed by force, the blood flowing from the wound and staining her white shirt.

"BITCH!" Richard screamed as he ran at her, but this time the result was different. Fujin grabbed and threw him, making him land on the ground. She even give him a chance as she kicked him in his stomach, amking him lose his breath. Fujin felt powerful, her pain feulung her rage. She dragged him up and then grabbed him by his arm, and made him run in cicle, making him run into a tree face first, a sickening crunch being heard as he made contact with the tree his body falling to the floor unconscious. She then simply spat on him and said venomously,

" WASN'T EXPECTING THAT WERE YOU!" right then she turned around, and her anger flared at how stupid she was. She put her hand on her wound and felt tears come out of the other eye at the blinding pain she felt. Right then she looked up and saw the blonde hair, and she instantly froze.

END

"ZELL!" Fujin said loudly as she sahot up from the couch, holding her bad eye, which still had the patch. She then realized that she was having a bad dream. She wiped her forehead, which was convered in cold sweat, and sighed as she looked outside. Right then she analyzed the dream that she had. It was the same as always the fear, the shame, the weakness of loving someone. These were the demons that eshe fought with every day, and she was slowly losing the batlle.

"why were you there Zell…" she asked her self as she held her head in her hands. She slowly got up, her vision still blurry. She then looked out the window, and it was well past sunset. Fujin's eye widened in horror at what that meant.

" Zell…" she said softly as she then rush to the bathroom, in order to get ready, even though it would not garanteed that he would be there.