Metamorphosis – Chapter 36

Clark sat; almost desolate as he let Lois's words sink in. He didn't know what to say, he could barely even think. At first, he believed she was staying away for some mediocre reason like to remain safe or that she was doing this for his best interest. The depth of which she disappeared were suddenly becoming more than he could bear.

"His name is Cameron. This is the first time I've ever left him alone, so I'm feeling a little weird. He looks just like you, especially his smile. One look and you feel like you'll do anything for him"

Clark's breathing became quicker. He recalled her words. Cameron. His smile. He has a son out there. How was that even possible?

"I…" he was at a loss for words. "I didn't even know I could"

"Neither could I," said Lois. "I've been on birth control so – "

"You didn't know about it," Clark cut her off, his eyes meeting hers for the first time since she revealed to him about the child… their child.

"Of course not!" Lois sees the battle his mind was waging inside himself. "I would've told you if I had known beforehand"

"Why didn't you tell me after?" Clark made a conscious effort not to raise his voice. He didn't want to alert his parents that he and Lois were having… he doesn't even know if this is an argument.

"I told you… things got… complicated"

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"Exactly what it does mean. Clark, I'm telling you now. I wasn't hiding him from you. I've never even entertained the idea of keeping him from you."

"You didn't have to do it alone"

Lois immediately softens at the remark. "I wasn't alone. I had my dad with me"

Unconvinced. "Right. The General. The same man that took you from me"

She takes his hand and holds it softly against her own. It's the first time they've touched each other in one year, and it felt electrifying.

"It was my choice to go to him. And it was my choice to stay with him after I found out I was pregnant. You want to blame someone, you blame me, okay," she says softly but seriously.

Clark looked away without taking his hand away. He's missed this. Being with her, talking, even when they're arguing, it means something to him. He's been going through the motions of this past year without any clear objective of the future. And now, the future he kept hidden after she left came pouring out of him all over again.

"Was the pregnancy… normal?"

Clark wanted to know every detail, but he made sure not to press too much. As overwhelming this is for him, the feeling goes both ways.

She nods a little hesitantly.

"It was… not what I expected," she answered simply. "And I can't really judge any differently because I've never been pregnant before"

"That's a relief," he quipped, making them both smile.

A first for the both of them since this whole thing started.

"He knows you, though. I talk to him about you all the time. He smiles whenever I mention your name, like he knows exactly who you are somehow"

That simple thought made everything he was feeling so surreal. Never in a million years has he ever imagined being a father. He thought about it, sure, but he was never really sure about it. A large part of him believed that he was biologically incapable of having a child.

"Has he done anything weird?" Clark asks curiously.

"What? Like floating over his crib? Incinerating flies with his heat vision?" Clark gives her a pointed look saying, 'not funny,' but Lois thought it was. "No, nothing Kryptonian-like. He's a perfectly healthy baby boy"

"Good," Clark expressed with great relief. "Do you have a picture of him?"

Lois smiles at him for a moment before reaching towards the locket she wore around her neck. She lifted it off her and hands it to him. He takes it carefully and pulls it open. A tiny photo of Lois holding their infant child in one side and a single photo of Cameron in the other. It was almost like his son was watching him.

His son…

"He's so small," he says, enraptured by the photo and committing it to memory. He wanted to remember every little thing about him. He smiled even greater when he notices something familiar about him. "He has your eyes"

Lois smiled at his quick observation. "Most of the time," she admits. "But when the sun hits it a certain way, it'll turn blue… like yours." She follows it with a shrug. "I didn't even know that was possible, but then again, he is our son"

Our son. Clark liked the sound of that. He liked it very much.

"Would you like to meet him?" she adds.

Clark looked up and suddenly felt uncertain.

"I don't know – I don't want to confuse him or anything"

Lois shook her head knowingly. "You're his father, Clark," she reminded him. "And he's three months old, you won't confuse him"

"What about your dad? Does he know about…" he points to himself and her.

She shakes her head slowly. "He doesn't know. The few hours I panicked after they took blood tests on me, I thought they would find something… not quite terran in my test results. It turned out that Cameron takes after me in the DNA pool. The only other plausible explanation I could think of was that your Kryptonian genes and humans probably have many similarities that the results came without any irregularities"

"I'm glad." Then the thought of knowing that Cameron was safe in that regard lifted his spirits. And with that thought, he finally decided. "Do you think we could see him now?"

Lois smiles.

"Yeah, I'd love for you to meet him"

"Are you sure it's okay?"

"Clark, I wouldn't ask you if it wasn't," she assured.

"I know, it's just… you disappear and suddenly here you are, and now this…" he points to the photo. "It's a lot to take in"

"I know," she nods understandably.

"What if I do something wrong?"

"Smallville," she smiled, resting her hand against his cheek. "You'll be just fine"

Clark smiles gratefully. Lois's assurance and support gives him a lot more strength than he had a few minutes ago. It's odd, he should be downright angry with her, furious even, but knowing they made a child together, everything else didn't seem to matter.

She took her hand away and Clark wished she hadn't. Lois walks towards the stairs.

"We should go talk to your parent's; I owe them an explanation too"

"Wait, not yet," Clark insisted much to Lois's surprise. "I know it's a little selfish, but I wanted to meet him first"

Lois understands. She deprived him of Cameron's birth. She wasn't going to deprive him of this.

"Then we should get going"

"Why don't we fly?" recommends Clark.

Lois raised her eyebrows.

"Are you okay to fly?" Clark adds, noting her questionable expression. "I've gotten pretty good at it while you were gone. It was a great way to vent my frustrations. I couldn't lash out on Earth, so I harassed the stars"

Lois laughs and then agrees.

"Don't let me go?"

Clark looked her in the eyes; the love she left behind a year ago was still evident in them.

"Lois…" he starts softly. "I've never let you go"

To be continued…