Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to anything X-Men or Marvel or to the lyrics of the songs I used which are 'Who You'd Be Today' and 'Broken' which is the story's namesake, but I thought that bit of the lyrics fit in this bit of the story, so they're a little early. Please, keep your arms and legs inside at all times and enjoy the next chapter!

To what degree is it okay to deceive someone? Is it okay to put yourself into a position to possibly hurt someone if the end effect could somehow help to bring the big picture all together? Is it okay to make someone believe in something untrue when you know that it's a lie but you know that it's all for a very good purpose? What if what you were doing even hurt you, could you do it? Could you make everyone you know believe it? There's a quote that says; 'What the eyes see and the ears hear, the mind believes'. This theory was soon put to the test inside Charles Xavier's mansion. The other things being tested; Logan's acting abilities and the lengths that he would go to, to make my dying wish of my father being put back into jail for my murder come to fruition.

Logan didn't have to do anything beneath him, like actually apologize to someone. No, Jean had taken care of that for him, and for some odd reason, even though Haylie had been turned down for a date over a corpse, she felt the sudden urge to go and talk to Logan once again. I was quite secure with my powers, but being a telepath much be so much fun; you can make people do whatever you want them to.

Haylie walked into the empty gym, save for Logan, who was fiercely and maliciously attacking the punching bag until it threatened to swing off the base.

"I thought you might be in here," she said.

"What do you want?" he asked, reaching out and stopping the bag.

"I thought you might have reconsidered my invitation to go out with me tonight?"

"Look, I take woman out, not the other way around,"

"Alright then, would you like to extend an invitation for me to go out with you?"

He took a deep breath and let out a long sigh, making his naked chest heave and Haylie to stare without discretion. "Have you ever been to Tubbies?"

Haylie Robbins had never been to a restaurant where no one knew who she was and didn't wait on her hand and foot. So, one can only imagine how she might react to a small, mom and pop hamburger stand with only ten or so tables in the whole place and not many items on the menu that weren't deep-fried. And so one might also consider the fact that when she asked Logan what to order, she wouldn't know not to listen to his suggestion of hot wings. Once she did, she whined far more than I had when I had tasted one of Logan's. 'Hot' does not even begin to describe those things, it felt as if someone had lit a match and put it under my tongue.

"Why in the world would you ever recommend that anyone actually order these things, are you trying to kill me?"

He smiled at her coyly. Granted, he hadn't suggested them to her just to watch her in pain, but he did find it quite amusing.

"I don't have a problem with 'em,"

"No, they shouldn't sell these things without a warning, that's completely wrong,"

"That's why they're called 'hot' wings, they're hot,"

"Those are so much worth than hot, though, my mouth is still burning,"

"You'll get over it,"

There was a small bit of silence as they ate. "I knew you'd change your mind," she said.

"About what?"

"Going out with me,"

He didn't say anything; he just nodded his head.

"Logan, can we talk for a minute?" Rogue asked as he and Haylie walked through the door.

"Yeah," he said, walking off from Haylie to follow her as she went down the hall. She led him into the kitchen and closed the door.

"What are you doin' with her?" she asked in a hushed voice.

"Nothing,"

"I thought you told her this mornin' that you would rather go to the cemetery than go out with her?"

"Listen Marie," he started.

"No, you listen to me Logan; I've heard her say some bad things about Chloe, she thinks she's better than her or something. I know that we didn't get along with each other but I never said anything bad about her,"

"I know kid, it's just gonna' be till she leaves,"

"Well if you keep hangin' out with her then she's not gonna' leave,"

"I'm doin' this for Chloe, so just give me some time, Marie,"

"How is hangin' out with her doin' something for Chloe? She obviously doesn't care about her,"

"And you did?" he retorted angrily.

"Well we weren't best friends or anything Logan, but I didn't say things about her and I was at least decent with her. She acts like she's better than all of us because her step-daddy gives her money. I didn't expect you would fall for her just because she's Chloe's sister,"

He swore. "Marie, would you just stop? I know what she's said about her and I know how she acts, but I have to ignore that for right now,"

"Why, why purpose does it serve? You're not just bein' nice to her, you took her out…on Valentine's Day!"

He grabbed her shoulder and pushed her away from the door. "Alright, listen to me, Marie," he said, moving his face in close with hers. She had become used to his sudden emotion states and no longer became alarmed when he would move and push her or when his voice would take a sudden angry tone. "I am doin' this so that I can talk her into meeting her father. When she does he can be put back into prison,"

"That's all it is?"

"Yeah, that's it,"

"Alright, but don't get carried away with it,"

"I'm not goin' to,"

"Are you sure, 'cause she's pretty,"

He looked away, over to the window and he saw me. I was curled up on the windowsill looking out at the snow. He shook his head and looked back at Rogue. He let out a long breath. "Yeah, I'm sure; she's not what I want,"

"No matter what you do, it's not gonna' bring her back,"

"I know…I know, but this is just something that I gotta' do for her,"

"Okay, if you need my help just ask me, alright?"

"I will,"

"Do you promise?"

"Yeah, I promise, Marie,"

Logan lay in bed, not able to go back to sleep. He had had another one of his dreams, but instead of me blaming him for my death, I yelled at him for taking Haylie out. The day had been a hard one for him; he had hoped to take me out on Valentine's Day, nothing romantic, just so the two of us could be together. What would we have done? he wondered. That thought seemed to stay at the forefront of his mind; what would I have done or said next? You see, I had a habit of telling Logan everything that was on my mind, whether it was serious or not. He was deeply pained by the thought of missing something that I had to say. It also hurt him to think about not being able to make me smile or laugh again. It was nights like those that forced him to remember how much he loved to make me smile. He prided himself on being able to do so, and could barely make it through a day without seeing me smile at least once. Those kinds of nights made him feel guilty for the time between New Years Eve and the day before my death that we barely spoke. If you don't know why we weren't speaking, it was because on New Years I kissed him and told him how I felt about him. Logan being Logan and not wanting to hurt me decided that even though he felt the same as me, we should just keep our relationship the same as it had bee. I felt like an idiot, why had I told him how I felt; I was so sure that it wouldn't work. However, no matter how sure I was it wouldn't work or that he didn't like me, the pain of actually hearing him say it felt worse than any I had ever felt.

Sunny days seem to hurt the most
Wear the pain like a heavy coat
I feel you everywhere I go.
See your smile, I see your face
I hear you laughing in the rain
Still can't believe you're gone.

It ain't fair you died too young
Like a story that had just begun
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you
All the hell that I've been through
Just knowing, no one could take your place.
Sometimes I wonder, who you'd be today.

He wasn't going to be able to sleep, he knew it, so he sat up in bed, turning to stand up, but then he saw my journal. He decided to stay in his room and read instead and so he flipped on the lamp beside his bed and grabbed the journal from where it lay on his nightstand. He opened the book somewhere near the back and found the entry page. It was from two days after Christmas and only four days before my kissing incident with him.

"Dear Journal,"

Today was fantastic; I had so much fun. It started at breakfast. Since we're still on winter break, everyone got to sleep in and so we didn't eat until nearly ten o'clock. It felt good to sleep in and just be lazy. During breakfast, the Professor announced that as soon as school lets back in, I can have my job back. I am so excited! I've missed working so badly.

After breakfast, I decided to go for a walk outside. It was beautiful, the snow was falling really heavy and I was just too excited about everything to stay indoors. I get my job back and in only four days, Logan and I are going to see 'Wicked' together. So I got all dressed up and took a walk around the lake. It's frozen solid and looks absolutely gorgeous down there. I wonder if I could skate on it? I'll have to ask the Professor about that before it thaws out. Anyway, I was walking back towards the school and I saw Logan standing outside smoking a cigar. For some reason, I had the urge to hit him with a snowball. So I did. I'm not usually that stupid but there was just something about him that made me think that I could actually throw one at him, laugh and then just walk away. Well, you know, studies now show that being in love with someone can actually cause the part of your brain that connects actions with consequence to shrink, or something, making you more likely to do stupid things. Hence the reason I suddenly found myself hurling a softball size snowball to the back of his head. It wasn't until he turned around looking totally pissed off that I realized just how bad of an idea that was. But when he saw me and realized that I had been the one who threw it, his anger disappeared and he was suddenly smiling at me wickedly. I attempted to walk away, but turning my back on his was a bad idea. So, I started walking, happy with the fact that for once, I had been able to sneak up on him. I only get a few feet away when I felt a snowball pelt me in the back of my head. I turned around just in time to see Logan running towards me and the next thing I know, I was laying flat on my back in the freezing snow with him on top of me.

"Now, why would you hit me with a snowball?"

"I was just playing around; it was only meant to be a joke!" I defended.

"So you thought it was funny?" he asked, smirking down at me. I was out in the freezing cold but my cheeks felt like they were on fire because I was blushing.

"Uh…no?" said sheepishly.

He pushed the hair in my eyes away with his hand and my breath caught in my throat. He is so insanely beautiful and it still surprised me when he's so gentle. "Are you sure about that, darlin'?"

Darlin' + Me Quiver

"Well, it was a little funny; you should have seen how mad you looked, that was hilarious!"

"You're not really in much of a position to be laughin' at me, now are you?" he said and continued smirking at me.

The movies always make it seem so romantic when people lie in the snow together, and to some degree, it was. I was smiling like a total lunatic and blushing like a complete dork because he was on top of me, smirking and making my breathing stop by continuing to brush the hair from my face. However, what wasn't romantic was the fact that he was a two hundred or so pound man with an extra one hundred pounds of metal inside of him, lying there. Granted he was propping most of his weight on his elbows, it was still a little awkward. Also, the snow was starting to soak through my clothes, making me wet and cold.

I thought about kissing him, because isn't that what you're supposed to do in a position like that? But I chickened out and decided not to. I'm such a wimp, but he really didn't look as though he were too eager to kiss me, either.

Anyway, we lay there for a while and I know, I know, I know that he was taking his time because he knew that it was making me blushed and embarrassed, why else would he do it? I know that he knows that I have a crush on him, I don't know, however, if he knows that I love him the way that I do. I really have to either get over it or tell him about it; it's getting far too much for me. I want to tell him, I really do, but what if he doesn't feel the same as me? That could be slightly devastating. Okay, so perhaps more than slightly. Logan's everything to me, if I told him that I was in love with him and he said that he just wanted to be friends, it might make things awkward. I can't let something get between us like that; nothing ever has before.

"Logan,"

"Yeah?"

"You are so going to pay for this,"

"You're the one who started it, just remember that,"

"I only threw a snowball at you,"

"And I threw one at you, so we're even,"

"No, you not only threw a snowball at me, but you also tackled me to the ground where I am lying in the freezing snow,"

"So what are you gonna' do to make me pay you back?" he asked, his smirk still plastered across his face.

"Well, if I told you then it wouldn't be quite as effective, would it? You'll have to wait and see, because it's going to be a surprise,"

"I don't like surprises darlin',"

"Too bad, you should have thought of that before you decided to knock down a helpless little girl who innocently threw a small, teeny-tiny snowball at you, and you are a big, strong, he-man. But whatever, I mean if you think that's justified then I suppose there's nothing I can do to convince you otherwise,"

"Well, I might be able to make it up to you,"

"And how might you do that?"

"Let me take you out for lunch?"

"You think that taking me out for lunch is going to pay me back for crushing my pancreas and giving me hypothermia?"

"I'll take you to Tubbies,"

"I can be ready in ten minutes,"

He smiled at me and shook his head, then stood up. He moves with such grace, it makes me sick. I mean, I'm a woman, I'm supposed to move with grace a beautiful, but instead I trip over everything that I can. So not fair. So anyway, after he stood up he gave me his hand and helped me up. I love his hands; they're so sexy…is that weird? I just think that they're man-gorgeous in the fact that they look as though they belong to a real man, you know? It's like even his powers couldn't stop the constant damage being done to them, so they have a slight worn in feel to them. Anyway, not only did he help me up but he also helped dust the snow off of me. I think he has either split personalities or Bi-Polar disorder, because seriously, who attack a girl and knocks them into the snow but then helps them up and to brush off said snow? I am completely in love with him. Sigh. Wait…I'm in love with a crazy man…it could be worse I guess, at least he ridiculously attractive and he's nice to me for the most part.

It took less than ten minutes for me to get ready to go to Tubbies. On the way over, Logan made fun of me for using the heater in his car to dry my hair. Apparently, he's never had to resort to suck things. When I lived with Tom and Viv up in Canada, I remember that when the power would go out, I would have to dry my hair in their car on the way to school. So that brought back quite a few memories for me.

"I'm sorry," he said while we were eating.

"For what?"

"If I hurt you out in the snow earlier,"

I smiled at him and blushed slightly. "No, I'm fine, don't worry about it,"

"Are you sure?" he asked and I felt totally guilty for complaining earlier.

"You know me well enough to know that if I was hurt even in the smallest bit that I would be whining about it right now, and as far as I can tell, I'm not really whining at the moment,"

He flashed me a smirk. "You do whine an awful lot,"

"You know what, I was being nice to you, I could have lied and said that you actually did hurt me but no, I was trying to make you feel better. Then you turn around and make fun of me. I really just don't appreciate that, Logan,"

"Well I think that as long as I still have to go to that stupid show with you,"

"Excuse me, have to go? I told you that I could take someone else but you said no. Who's whining now?" I said, cutting him off.

He only smiled at me.

I still can't believe that he actually bought me tickets to a Broadway musical, that's just priceless.

Once we got back to the mansion, Logan and I played a few games of poker. I beat him eight out of twelve and he had to let me try on his cowboy boots. I am now dead set on getting a pair of my own. They were a little bit big on me, but I am so in love with them. You know that it's sad when I start drawing my fashion influence from a self-defense teaching ex-cage fighter.

"You know Logan, I wouldn't mind if you just gave me these boots, they look better on me anyway," I said to him. I had to close the lid on his toilet and stand up on it to see what they looked like in his mirror.

"No, now take them off,"

"Nope, this is my prize for beating you in poker,"

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned up against the doorframe that led into his bathroom. "You didn't beat me,"

"I won more games than you did and so yes Mr. Logan, I beat you like a drum,"

He was quiet for a minute, watching me as I tried very carefully to turn as far as I could without falling. I thought that once I realized that I like Logan, really like him, that his watching me would make me feel weird, but it doesn't. No matter how I feel about him, he's still just Logan, always watching out for me.

"Why do you want those things anyway?"

"I don't know, I just like them, I think they look cute,"

"Cute?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. (I love it when he does that)

"Well, you look hot in them, instead of cute,"

"Not lookin' too bad yourself, darlin'," he said to me, walking over and helping me down once he realized what I was trying to do. I may have blushed some, but by now, I'm so used to it, I can barely tell anymore. "Maybe if you're good I might buy you a pair,"

"And what does me being good consist of?" I asked, sitting down and pulling off the boots, handing them back to him.

"No more beating me at poker,"

"Well hey, if I keep beating you, I can get enough money to buy them on my own," I said, walking back into his bedroom and slipping my house shoes back on. "And then perhaps I could start wearing flannel and redneck belt buckles,"

"Hey, don't knock flannel and don't make fun of my belt buckle, either,"

"I'm neither knocking nor making fun of either. I only said that perhaps I should start wearing them if I'm going to steal your boots, too,"

"You'd make it look a heck of a lot sexier than I do," he said and I know that I blushed that time.

"Oh, because you have a real problem with that, don't you, woman are just completely turned off by how you dress," I said sarcastically, sitting down on his bed and shuffling the desk of cards. "Want to play me again?"

"Why, do you want my car now?"

"Tempting, but no, I was actually thinking we could just play for the fun of it,"

"No,"

"Why not?"

"Because I wanna' win something,"

"How about the pride of a job well done?" I said sheepishly.

"No," he said again. "How about if you win I buy you a pair of boots,"

"And if you win?"

"You have to…go and shoot pool with me tomorrow night,"

"I suck at pool, though,"

"That's the point,"

"So what, you win and I have to go play pool so that you can try to beat me again and take my money from me?"

"Well, I don't think I'll have to try to beat you at pool, so I'm not gonna' take your money,"

"How very kind of you," I said, rolling my eyes at him. I sighed. "Alright, deal, but when I beat you, you had better pay up; I'll want my boots before I start work back,"

"Alright darlin', deal the cards,"

Alas, Logan won six out of ten games. Six! He barely won. Not that I actually mind that he won because even thought I have to wait to get my boots, I'm going to play pool with him tomorrow night. I'm excited. Yeah, so we played poker until it was time for dinner and then we went and ate with everyone. It was relatively uneventful, but afterwards the staff all decided to watch a movie together. The only one that the guys and girls all agreed on was 'Casablanca'. Rogue decided that she didn't like the movie after about thirty minutes so she and Bobby went to bed. Which is quite a shame; I don't know how anyone could not love that movie. Whatever, to each their own I guess. Anyway, the Professor was the only one who played along with me while I was quoting the movie. Come to find out, the man does one mean Humphrey Bogart impression. Once the movie ended, we all shuffled off to bed, where I'm at now.

Well, I'm tired and sleepy so I must go now, but I just had to write before going to sleep so that I wouldn't forget anything. Today was great and I'm looking forward to playing pool tomorrow night. Granted I'm terrible at it, but perhaps I can learn a little bit more and hey, I get to hang out with Logan, what's more fun than that? Okay, there are probably some things more fun, but I'm too sleepy to think of any.

Alright, I'm about to fall asleep writing this, goodnight!

Remember To:

Clean Room

Pick up new student files from Chuck's office

Get copy of the photo Logan and I had made at the Christmas party from Dr. Grey

Think of a way to get Logan to fall in love with me so I won't have to worry about rejection when I tell him how I feel

Chloe,"

Logan closed the journal and gently placed it back onto his nightstand. He remembered that day, especially when we had been out in the snow. He had wanted to kiss me too. Not because he had seen all of the romantic movies that I had and thought that that was what you were supposed to do, but because he had thought that I had looked so beautiful. My cheeks and lips were that pink-purple color they turn when you're out in the cold. My hair had fallen all around me, circling my head like a golden halo. My pale skin had blended with the white or the snow and I was smiling up at him. He remembered that he had been so diligent about brushing the hair from my face because he had wanted an excuse for touching my face, for touching me. He had loved me back then as well, but, like me, had not acted on any of his feelings. Partly because he was afraid that I would start to see him as he saw himself, and partly because he was afraid to hurt me. But mostly Logan didn't tell me how he felt because he was scared. Scared that I like Jean, would turn him down and that he would have to continue living knowing that I didn't love him the way that he had me. He was also scared because Logan lived by the same rule of thumb that I had; when good things happen to you, something bad has to happen, or something's not right. Logan was scared that if he told me that he loved me and we ended up together that something bad would happen to me, because I would make him too happy, things would be too good for him and so he chose to, for once since he could remember; forgo doing what he wanted. If only he had realized that something bad was going to happen to me no matter what he did, perhaps we could have made our time together all the more special. Yes, had Logan known that I would be taken away from him; he would have kissed me that day and every day after it. He would have told me how beautiful he thought that I was, how smart, how talented, how absolutely radiant he saw me. He had wanted to tell me, and even tried a few times with mixed successes, but you see, Logan couldn't tell me all he thought of me. It had nothing to do with not wanting to show me how he felt about me; it had to do with the simple fact that every time he tried, he couldn't find the right words. Sure, he thought that I was beautiful, but he hardly said it because he was always searching for a better word. He wanted for me to fully understand just how he felt and yet there were not words quite as descriptive as the feelings he had for me. There was no way for him to tell me how gorgeous and full of life my smile had been, or the feeling he got when looking into my eyes. Logan had never been one to share his feelings with people, unless they were that of a disgruntled nature, but for me, he would have told it all to me, had only he found the words worth praising me. What he didn't understand, though, was that I latched onto every word he said that just to hear him speak was enough for me. The times that he had told me what he thought of me, I was high for days. Not because I felt as though I was suddenly better than everyone else or that I even agreed with him completely, but because Logan was the single most influential person in my life. I loved him with everything that I had in me and with every kind of love you can have. When you think so highly of someone as I had with Logan, to hear them say that you're beautiful, smart and worth everything good that you have, it leaves a deep impression on your mind and heart. I don't know if he knew it or not, but Logan owned my heart, he had since I was young and no matter where I am, it will always belong to him.

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away.
I keep your photograph and I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain.

'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away.

You've gone away, you don't feel me, anymore

'Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough.
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

You've gone away.
You don't feel me here anymore.