CHAPTER 19
4 MONTHS LATER: HOUSE
Lauren smiles at the gurgling baby, "Hey baby boy." She lifts Ian out of the crib. "How's my baby?" She kisses his cheek as she sets him on the changing table. "You are getting so big." She laughs as the baby shrieks happily.
Sark leans against the doorframe watching Lauren interact with the four month old baby. 'All we need is our baby girl and we would be a family.' He clenches his jaw as his mind goes to Vaughn, 'Bastard I should kill him.'
"Ian" Lauren laughs as the baby pulls at his feet and squirms, "come on stay still." She notices Sark watching them from the doorway, "You could help me out here." She says with mock anger, "You know the only time he stays still is when you occupy him."
"Sorry I was thinking" Sark joins them in the bedroom grabbing one of the baby's favored toys he offers it to Ian.
Lauren watches as Sark plays with the baby by teasing him with the toy. She stops when she hears the baby shriek with laughter reaching for his toy, 'We had none of this with Sophia.' Feeling Sark's eyes on her she flashes him a small smile continuing to change the baby's diaper.
Sark picks up the baby shifting him in his arms so the little boy is looking out around the room. "Lauren"
"It's been almost seven months." Lauren whispers as she wipes the changing table down.
Sark gently grabs her wrist forcing her to stop cleaning, "We'll find her."
"I miss her"
Sark tugs her close kissing her lightly, "As do I."
Lauren blinks back tears resting her head on his shoulder her eyes on Ian as the boy looks around. "I want to hold her. I miss hearing her voice." She takes a deep breath, "See them together." She takes the baby from Sark hugging and kissing the boy trying to keep from crying.
"I was thinking that when we get Sophia back perhaps we should contemplate leaving London." Sark murmurs as he pulls her close kissing her head.
"What about"
"I'll figure something out."
"Why leave?"
"A new start. A vacation... whatever you want it to be."
"Maybe."
HOUR LATER
Lauren sits on the sun deck porch her journal open before her as Ian sleeps in his swing.
'Its almost seven months now since Michael took Sophia. I miss her so much. I miss hearing her voice. I miss her hugs. I miss hearing her call me Mama. I miss hearing her say 'I love you Mama'. I miss hearing her laugh. I miss watching her and Sark play and read. I miss seeing them together.
All I want is for my babies to be here with us... where they belong.
Julian was right about writing my feelings and thoughts out. I know he doesn't do it but that's probably because he's spent his whole life having to move at a moments notice. I'm glad he decided to let me try this rather than dragging me to the doctor for anti-depressants like Mother wanted. I know she's worried about me but I couldn't stop the bonding time I got with Ian by breastfeeding because of drugs.' She looks at the little boy and smiles before returning to her writing, 'I love my little boy so much, he has kept me going this whole time. At first it, was hard because I was so upset and depressed and I didn't want to be that way around Ian. When he was sleeping I would just pull the covers over my head and cry.
Julian has been very understanding; I know this is hard for him. He has taken care of me on the days I couldn't get out of bed during bed rest and after Ian was born. He has handled Ian when I was too upset to get out of bed. He has forced me to face things when he realized I needed to face them. I admit there are days that are still quite a blur to me where all I did was eat, sleep, and nurse Ian... and that was because Sark had to remind me. I know I shouldn't have had to be reminded my baby needed me but I did... not just because of the pain but I was missing Sophia so much at the same time.'
"Darling"
Lauren looks up to see Sark in the doorway dressed in his normal leaving the house attire of a black pin strip suit with a blue shirt and tie, "Where are you going?"
"I have to meet someone."
"When will you be back?"
"In a few days."
Lauren watches as he carefully lifts the baby out of the swing, "If you wake him you're staying until you get him to go back to sleep." She warns smiling as she watches him kiss the baby's head and returns him to the swing. "Where are you going?" She asks standing.
"Jack requested I meet with a source." At Lauren's expression he smiles, "He's not the type of source you think. He's just informational."
Lauren sighs, "When will you be back?"
"Hopefully early tomorrow." He trails his fingers down her cheek
Lauren smiles at his concerned expression, "We'll be fine."
"I know." Sark kisses her lightly, "I love you Lauren."
"I love you too." Lauren watches as he walks into the house then settles back in her chair.
NEXT NIGHT: SOMEWHERE
"Hello Mr. Vaughn... I'd say Agent but you have been fired... so I heard."
Vaughn stops in his tracks pulling his daughter behind him, "How did you find us?"
"It took a while... but you should have remembered one thing about me... one thing Sydney has said numerous times"
"That you are a homicidal, egomaniacal brat?" Vaughn picks up Sophia inching towards the door.
"Besides that" Sark smirks "I am very much like a dog with a bone... I don't let go." He looks at Sophia who is smiling, "And this wasn't something I wasn't going to let go of."
"Hi." Sophia smiles waving at Sark, "Daddy I want to get down."
Sark notices Vaughn slowly moving back to the door, "I would advise against that." Sark nods just as a man steps into the apartment behind them. He walks over to Vaughn who holds Sophia closer, "Give her to me." He says coldly. "I'm taking her home to her Mother where she belongs." He takes Sophia from Vaughn who glares at him keeping his mouth shut. "Keep an eye on him." Sark walks out of the apartment relieved to have his little girl back.
"What about Daddy?" Sophia asks as they leave the apartment.
Sark winces, 'He's not your bloody Daddy. I am.' He mentally slaps himself, "He isn't coming with us. You are going home and he is going somewhere else."
"Why?" Sophia asks as they reach the car.
Sark sets the girl down beside the car tilting his head at the man standing by the car, "Go keep an eye on the situation. But return in a few moments"
"Yes sir."
Once the man is gone Sark crouches before Sophia and smiles brushing her now dark brown hair out of her face, "Mama and I have missed you."
"I missed you too." Sophia smiles then frowns "Daddy wouldn't let me call."
"I know." Sark reaches into his pocket removing the picture he had put there, "I brought you something." He hands the picture to Sophia, "I thought you'd like to see a picture of Mama and your little brother Ian." He watches as Sophia's eyes light up, "Now I have something to take care of so I want you to be good, all right?"
Sophia nods her eyes on the picture
"Then we will go home." Sark kisses her forehead then straightens up opening the back door ushering Sophia into the car. He looks at the man as he returns to the car. "Keep an eye on her." He says gruffly as he closes the door walking back to the apartment where he finds Vaughn handcuffed to a table. "Get out" he says to the man guarding Vaughn. Once the room is empty Sark sits on the couch, "What you did could have killed Lauren... did you even care about that? Or was your... anger over the truth so bad you didn't care about Lauren's health?"
"I did what was best for Sophia"
Sark shakes his head, "No you were only thinking of yourself. If you had given any thought to anyone other than yourself you wouldn't have taken Sophia." He stands "Just be glad I am no longer the man I was... you would be dead otherwise."
"Please you'll kill me anyway. It is what you do." Vaughn winces as Sark punches him.
Sark leans in, "You brought this on yourself Mr. Vaughn. I was willing to step aside and allow my daughter to consider you her father... you lost that privilege with this stunt. You caused Lauren a lot of stress she should never have had. If she had lost the baby or I had lost her... I would have killed you on sight." He says coldly
"What now taking your rightful place?" Vaughn sneers. "You think she's going to forget me?"
Sark stares at Vaughn, "The man you were perhaps not... but this selfish version I hope she does. I will maintain my silence until she is old enough for the truth. As much as I hate the fact she considers you her father, I will respect it until she is old enough. If there is ever the chance you get out I will kill you if you go anywhere near my family." He removes his phone pressing a number, "You can come get him." He hangs up. "Enjoy the cell. You will be there for a while... and be glad I didn't do what you did to me." Sark turns to walk away, "Oh what the hell" He punches Vaughn in the face before walking out of the apartment. He glances at the blood on his knuckles and removes the handkerchief wiping it off he shoves it in his pocket. "Make sure he doesn't escape they'll be here in a few minutes." He makes his way to the car and gets in smiling at Sophia, "Let's go." He tells the driver.
"What about Daddy?"
"Daddy has other... issues to deal with." Sark says as he sees three black sedans appear. "Now let's go home."
"What about Mama? Can I talk to Mama?" Sophia asks excitedly. "I miss Mama."
"Sure." Sark removes his phone pressing the number for the house.
"Hello"
"I have someone who wants to talk to you." He hands the phone to Sophia.
"Mama"
Sark smiles knowing hearing Sophia's voice has instantly lifted some of her depression.
"I missed you Mama. I'm OK. Uh huh."
OVER AN HOUR LATER: JET
Sark covers Sophia with a blanket and removes his phone pressing redial for the house. "Darling"
"Is Sophia..."
"Right beside me. She's fast asleep."
"And Michael is he..."
"Still among the living, I handed him over to Bristow. He is going to be spending some time in lock up."
"What if he gets out?"
"We'll discuss it later."
"We're going to have our babies together." Lauren says relieved
"Mmm"
"What does she look like?"
"He dyed her hair." Sark says with disgust
"What color?"
"Dark brown."
"My baby's hair was dyed." Lauren protests. "She's too young for that."
"It will grow out." Sark points out
"I know but still... she's a baby." Lauren sighs. "Has she gotten any bigger?"
"A little."
"I just want to hold her."
"Soon."
"Good."
"How is Ian?"
"He's been fed and is fast asleep."
"How are you feeling?" Sark questions
"Exhausted. Relieved. Happy... so many emotions." She whispers tearfully.
"Soon" Sark reaches out stroking Sophia's hair as they continue talking. "We should be back tomorrow afternoon."
NEXT AFTERNOON: LONDON
"Mama" Sophia calls as they enter the house.
Lauren walks down the stairs with Ian in her arms crouching she catches her daughter in a one armed hug. "Let me look at you" She looks Sophia over "you've grown so much." She brushes Sophia's hair back. Hearing Ian gurgle she looks at the baby, "This is your baby brother Ian Jacob."
"Hi Ian." Sophia laughs as the baby grins at her.
Lauren hands Ian to Sark then picks Sophia up hugging her tight. "I've missed you baby girl."
"Missed you Mama" Sophia hugs her Mom tight.
HOUR LATER
Sark steps up behind Lauren kissing her head his eyes on Sophia who is playing with Ian, "They seem to be getting along."
"This is great isn't it?"
"Incredible." Sark agrees. "Have you called your parents and informed them?"
"They're coming over soon." Lauren laces their fingers as they rest on her middle, "I want to talk to him"
"I figured. Jack informed me that they are taking him to the CIA office in London for a few days."
"Do we tell her?" Lauren wonders
"Tell her what?"
"Everything"
"She doesn't need to know the truth about her paternity."
Lauren turns staring at Sark, "You don't want her to know? You don't want her to call you Daddy?"
Sark brushes her hair back, "Of course I do but telling her the truth would just confuse things. How are we supposed to explain to her the truth without hurting her? Perhaps one day I will hear that from her but I'm not going to break the original deal we had." He looks over at Sophia sadly, "The fact he's no longer going to be in her life is going to hurt her enough... finding out her whole life is a lie... she doesn't need that." Feeling Lauren kiss her chin he looks down, "She wouldn't understand."
Seeing the sadness and longing in Sark's eyes Lauren kisses him lightly. "One day?"
Sark smiles faintly, "One day."
Lauren turns her attention back to Sophia and Ian, "Our babies together." She says murmurs
"Mmm" He nuzzles her cheek, "Can't get any better can it?"
"No. Though Mother is really starting to drop hints about marriage." Lauren laughs
"And what about you?"
Lauren shrugs, "Last one didn't go so well." She points out.
Sark turns her around "Ours won't be like that. I wouldn't let anyone or anything get between us. If I want something I don't let it go."
"Are you saying you're ready for marriage?" Lauren asks
Sark shrugs "I have no idea. I do admit the idea of being married to you does have... appeal." He leans in to kiss her just as the baby starts crying. He groans resting his head against his, "Bloody hell every time we have a moment he starts crying."
"He's a baby." Lauren smiles "Not like he can talk and tell us what's wrong."
"Mama, he's crying."
Lauren smiles stepping out of his arms she joins the kids in the living room. She picks up Ian rubbing his back, "Hey little guy."
After watching the scene for a few moments, Sark walks into the living room joining Sophia on the floor.
EVENING
"Grandma, Grandpa" Sophia runs to her grandparents who hug her. "I missed you."
"We missed you too." Olivia smiles at the little girl. "Look at you. You've grown."
"I got new clothes." Sophia grins
"Well you've grown." Lauren smiles at her daughter after hugging her parents.
"Where's Ian?" Olivia asks
"In bed." Lauren replies
George takes the little girl from Olivia taking her to the living room.
"Where's Julian?" Olivia asks as she slips her arm into Lauren's guiding her daughter into the living room.
"He went to pick some things up for Sophia. I ordered some clothes from several places but they didn't have everything ready until now. He should be home soon." They stand in the entryway of the living room watching George interact with Sophia. "You look so much happier."
"I am. I have Sophia back. I have my children together."
"And Michael?" Olivia questions
"He's in serious trouble with the CIA. I'm supposed to see him tomorrow."
"What are you going to say to him?"
"I haven't figured that out."
"And what of the issue of paternity... are you going to tell Sophia?"
Lauren shakes her head, "Julian wants to stay with our original agreement... until Sophia is old enough to understand."
Olivia nods about to speak as the front door opens and Sark enters carrying bags.
"I have been turned into your bloody pack mule." Sark grumbles entering the house he sets the bags down.
"Is that all?" Lauren asks
"No. What did you do buy everything in her size?" Sark asks
"She needed clothes." Lauren shrugs just as Sophia runs to the door to see the bags.
"You baby girl are spoiled beyond belief." Sark tugs on Sophia's braid getting a laugh from the girl. "But you deserve it." He kisses Lauren quickly then smiles at George and Olivia, "George, Olivia, good to see you."
"Go get the rest of the bags so I can get all that can be washed tonight so she has clothes for tomorrow."
"Has she always been this bossy?" Sark asks Olivia.
"She had her bossy times as a child." George admits
"I was not bossy"
"You were at times."
Lauren looks at Sophia who is looking through the bags as Sark walks out of the house. "Let's take this into the living room and go through everything." Lauren grabs the bags heading into the living room.
"So Sophia did you have a good time with Michael?" Olivia inquires
Sophia shrugs settling beside her Mom on the living room floor, "We went lots of places. We played at the park every day."
"Same park?" George asks
Sophia shrugs "Sometimes" She watches as her Mom opens the bags.
"What's for dinner?" Olivia asks
"Chicken and salad." Lauren answers as she removes items of clothing from bags checking the sizes. "Sophia, stand up."
"Why?"
"I want to check and see if these fit." Lauren answers holding the shirt and jeans up to her daughter.
"All right this is all of them." Sark informs Lauren as he sets the last of the bags on the floor. "George, Olivia would you like a drink?"
"Sure. Scotch" George requests
"White wine please." Olivia chimes in watching her daughter and granddaughter interact.
HOUR LATER
Olivia stands in the doorway of the laundry room watching Lauren moves the clothes from the washer to the dryer, "So what now?"
"I have no idea." Lauren admits. "Right now I don't think Julian and I are ready to let her out of our sight for a while." She closes the dryer door then starts another load.
"What about Michael? Are you going to allow him to see her?"
Lauren looks at her Mom startled, "No."
"Not even to say goodbye?"
"He doesn't deserve that... not after what he did."
"Lauren"
"Stop defending him Mother." Lauren says angrily. "I know you loved having him as the perfect son-in-law but he was far from it." She says stiffly.
"He made mistakes... not like you were perfect either."
Lauren walks around her Mom closing the door so Sophia won't overhear the argument, "He drove me to it Mother. Before Sydney returned, hell even after, I never once thought about cheating on him."
"Yet you did"
"I admit that." Lauren acknowledges. "What happened happened... I can't change it and I don't think I would."
"So marrying Michael you don't regret it?"
"The only reason I don't regret it was because it led to meeting Julian and having my babies."
"Did you ever love Michael?" Olivia demands
Lauren shrugs "I did at first but I think we rushed it for all of us." She turns back to the laundry. "He took my daughter and that is not something I will forgive. He deserves whatever the CIA does to him but I swear if he does get out and goes near Sophia... he'll wish he was back in lockup."
WHILE LATER
"Everything all right?" Sark inquires as he and Lauren clean up the dinner dishes.
Lauren shrugs "Soph, I put some pajamas on your bed. Can you go get ready for bed?"
"OK" Sophia skips out of the kitchen.
"Mother and I had words"
"About?"
"She's still defending him." Lauren says angrily. "He takes my daughter and he keeps her from me with no contact for seven months but she still defends him." Lauren tosses the towel down crossing her arms over her chest, "Sometimes it's like she likes him more than me."
"What brought this conversation?"
"She asked me if I was going to let Michael see Sophia."
"What did you say?"
"That he doesn't deserve too."
"What about Sophia?" Sark asks "Don't you think she deserves to say goodbye?"
"I don't want him near her... ever again" Lauren turns her back to him going back to cleaning up the counter.
"Lauren"
"I don't want to talk about it." She says stiffly.
The two continue cleaning in silence only to have it broken when Sophia walks into the kitchen, "Do I have to go to bed Mama?"
Lauren turns smiling at her daughter, "Yes." She wipes her hands dry and picks Sophia up, "You need to go to bed. Get some rest."
Sophia sighs, "Oh fine."
Sark watches as they walk out of the kitchen, 'Lets just see how tomorrow goes.'
HOUR LATER
Sark walks into the master bedroom to find Sophia sleeping next to Lauren who is watching the little girl, "I take it tonight we will have a visitor."
Lauren looks up giving him a faint smile, "Problem with it?"
Sark sits on the edge of the bed looking at Sophia, "Not at all." The two sit in silence observing the sleeping girl.
LATE THAT NIGHT
"I think she has your nose." Lauren says softly as she and Sark lie in bed watching Sophia.
"I think she's all you"
"She does have your smile." Lauren states
"That she does." Sark agrees "But other than that I think she's all you."
"You know up until I saw her I wasn't a hundred percent she was yours." Lauren admits "I mean I knew the chance was higher that she was but not at a 100."
"What made you realize she was?"
Lauren shrugs "I just did the moment I saw her... held her it became so apparent." She shivers feeling Sark kiss her shoulder. "I don't know how to fully explain it."
"Such innocence... something I never thought I would be part of... let alone the innocence being half of me." Sark says awed.
"Truth is I never saw myself as a mother but the moment I knew she was on her way" Lauren moves Sark's hand from her hip to cover her middle, "that there was possibly a little part of us growing inside of me" she carefully shifts to her back looking at Sark, "I wanted her so much." She trails her fingers over the back of his hand, "when you suggested we leave... I wanted too." She admits
"I know" he kisses her temple
"I almost said yes. I wanted to say yes so bad. I also knew I couldn't risk it. Running would have caused so much trouble. Trouble we didn't need." She looks at Sophia sighing sadly, "And raising her on the run wouldn't have been fair to her."
"I know." Sark nuzzles her cheek, "Doesn't mean I liked being away from my family." He looks at Sophia, "And the moment you told me you were pregnant I gained a family... granted I wasn't around"
"We were still together... through Sophia." Lauren yawns
"It's late. If Ian wakes I will take care of him."
Lauren nods sleepily.
"I love you"
"Love you too" Lauren yawns as he reaches back turning off the lamp.
"Sleep well my Princess."
NEXT MORNING
"Are you sure about doing this Lauren?" Sark questions as he stands in the doorway of the bathroom watching Lauren get ready. "This isn't going to change what happened"
"He kept her from us for seven months Julian." Lauren turns to face him leaning against the counter, "He risked her life because he was angry."
"If you think this is going to help things fine go for it"
"It will make me feel a whole lot better."
Sark steps up to Lauren and strokes her cheek with his thumb, "Then go for it." He brushes his lips across hers "I love you."
Lauren smiles, "I love you too." She turns around turning back to the mirror.
Stepping up to her Sark kisses her neck briefly before walking out of the bathroom.
FEW MINUTES LATER
"Mama, where are you going?" Sophia asks
"I have a meeting." Lauren kisses Sophia's nose, "Behave."
Sophia grins, "I will."
Lauren stands looking at Sark who is leaning against the wall, "Are you sure you can handle this?" She asks Sark
"I resent that." Sark protests
Lauren laughs stepping up she kisses him lightly
"Are you sure?" Sark asks
Lauren nods "I have to do this." She walks out of the house.
HOUR LATER: CONFERENCE ROOM
Lauren enters the room regarding her ex husband.
"Lauren" Vaughn says calmly wincing when she slaps him
"What the hell were you thinking! You took my daughter!"
Vaughn rubs his cheek, "I was looking out for her. You obviously chose him over her."
"I didn't choose her over him. I chose both. Just because you couldn't handle the truth you didn't have to take her from me." Lauren says angrily. "Did you give any thought to anyone other than yourself!" She exclaims
"Sark's dangerous Lauren, if you couldn't see that you didn't deserve to raise her."
"Dangerous! He didn't take her away from her own mother! He didn't disappear and risk her life because of jealousy! He has stepped aside Michael... despite what you did he still doesn't want her to know the truth. He has done nothing to step on your toes or take your place."
"He's a killer. He's going to cause her pain... and you as well."
"Just shut up Michael. He is done with the spy world... so am I! He has spent these last seven months looking for Sophia and taking care of me when I was a complete wreck! He's put his business life on hold... something you never would have done." Lauren says sadly. "And to think I thought you were a good guy... when did you become such a selfish bastard" she shakes her head, "Goodbye Michael."
Vaughn watches as his ex walks out of the room.
Lauren walks out of the building stopping when she sees Sydney step out of a car.
"Lauren"
"Sydney" Lauren says calmly
"I take it you saw Vaughn?"
Lauren nods "Have you?"
"Going now. How is Sophia doing?"
"She's good. Home playing with Ian and Julian."
"Lauren... Vaughn told me about Sophia"
Lauren winces, "I figured he would go crying to you." She says with slight bitterness. "So what you told him you wouldn't take him back?"
Sydney shrugs "We're done."
"He still loves you. He always loved you." Lauren says sadly. "It's out... it's why I resigned. Why Jack took over as Sark's handler." She turns towards her car, "Michael loved you... I was just his distraction."
"Did you ever love Vaughn?"
"I did." Lauren sighs. "I'm not going to apologize for falling in love with Sark."
Sydney nods "You love who you love. Besides, I think you have changed him. He seems more... relaxed. I just hope he doesn't end up hurting you Lauren."
"He won't. Besides he knows I'd shoot him if he cheated on me."
Sydney laughs
"It works" Lauren smiles faintly
"I better go see him. Lauren... I am sorry he did this"
"Thanks"
HOUR LATER: HOUSE
"I'm back" Lauren calls smiling when she hears laughter coming from the living room. She stands in the entryway watching as Sark holds Sophia upside down. "Don't drop my baby." She warns
Sark flips Sophia right side up, "Have I even come close to dropping you today baby girl?"
Sophia shakes her head, "Nope." She grins then looks at her Mom, "Hi Mama."
"Hey sweetie." Lauren kisses Sophia's cheek then kisses Sark lightly. She looks in the playpen where Ian is lying on his back sucking on his toes. "Hey having fun with those toes?" She reaches in picking him up she kisses his nose.
Sark looks at Sophia who is resting her head on his shoulder then at Lauren who is cuddling Ian.
MIDAFTERNOON
Lauren smiles at the sight of Sophia quietly playing as she sits beside Sark on the couch.
"Ian asleep?" Sark asks pressing his lips to Lauren's hair.
"Of course."
"How did it go?"
"We talked. He said it was my fault he took her. His normal excuses" Lauren shrugs.
"Mama"
"Yes Soph?"
"When am I going to see Daddy?"
Lauren sighs sitting up, "Come here" once Sophia is on her lap Lauren strokes her hair. "Sweetie we need to talk about that" she takes a deep breath "Daddy won't be around anymore."
"Why not?"
"Daddy did something he wasn't supposed to do and he got caught for it."
"What did he do?"
"It's hard to explain."
"Where is he?"
"Well do you remember when you get in trouble and I send you to your room?"
"Uh huh" Sophia nods
"Daddy's in for a very long time out."
"For how long?"
"I don't know."
"When will I see him?"
"I don't know sweetie." Lauren runs her fingers through Sophia's hair hiding her grimace. 'Not her natural color. Makes her look paler than normal.'
Sophia sighs snuggling between her Mom and Sark. "Time out is boring."
Lauren laughs, "That it is."
"I'm sure he'll occupy himself." 'Figuring out ways to kill me.' Sark thinks grimly.
WHILE LATER
"Time out?" Sark lifts his brow as he leans against the doorframe of the laundry room.
"It is the simplest way to explain why she won't see him." Lauren shrugs folding the shirt in her hands. "And in child terms he is in time out... one that will hopefully last until she's an adult."
"She's going to want to see him Lauren."
"She's not going to see him." Lauren says stiffly.
"Lauren"
"Where's Sophia?"
"She was tired so I sent her up to take a nap." Sark watches Lauren, "You can't penalize her for his actions Lauren. As much as both of us dislike the fact he is still her father. She loves him... how fair is it to her to not allow her to see him?"
"Why are you bringing this up?" Lauren asks turning to face him. "The few times I have referred to Michael as her father you became angry."
"I'm thinking of Sophia. Personally I would rather have him out of her life but its not fair to her." He sighs heavily, "I'm trying to be the better man in this. I'm trying to put aside my feelings over the past and his current acts and think of Sophia's feelings." He runs his fingers through his hair grimacing, "I hate the bastard for all the trouble he has caused but" he takes a deep breath, "he's who she sees as his father."
Lauren steps up to Sark her arms going around his shoulders, "Still hurts you doesn't it?"
Sark shrugs "We made this choice... and it would just cause her more confusion to tell the truth."
Lauren runs her fingers down his neck, "The first time she said Dada to Michael... I wanted to protest... scream, 'He's not your Daddy'" She sighs. "I couldn't. I gave him probably one of the biggest fake smiles of happiness when all I wanted to do was cry." She swallows heavily then meets Sark's eyes, "I knew I shouldn't have wanted that but that's what I've always wanted... to hear her call you Daddy."
"Still have one who's not talking" Sark points out
"It's not the same... she's our first born."
"I admit the idea of hearing her call me Daddy is appealing"
Lauren kisses him lightly, "Perhaps one day"
Sark deepens the kiss hoping to end the depressing conversation.
LITTLE LATER
"No" Lauren protests halfheartedly as she feels Sark pull back from pinning her to the laundry room door her arms around his neck her legs around her waist
"Lauren"
"Not ready to move." She nuzzles his neck. "Remember Rome? The basement of the club?"
Sark chuckles "I had fingernail marks in my shoulders and down my back. My kitten couldn't keep her claws in." He teases
Lauren smiles "I was sore for days." She murmurs
"We hadn't had time to be together for weeks." Sark kisses her head.
Lauren lowers her legs from his waist yet remains pressed against the door. "I'm still amazed we never got caught by anyone."
"Mmm"
"The quickies in alleys and hotel rooms."
"My car." Sark smiles faintly.
"My cravings" Lauren smiles
"Know what I remember?"
"What?"
"The club in Denmark the week after you told me."
Lauren groans, "God I was so horny. I needed you so bad."
"When you showed up in that outfit and fucked me right there not caring if anyone saw us." Sark smiles at the memory.
/FOUR YEARS EARLIER: DENMARK
"You shouldn't be here." Sark murmurs. "What if you get caught?"
"I don't care" Lauren whispers ignoring the tears that are filling her eyes. She looks around relieved no one is watching them, "I need you." She kisses him./
The two stare at each other remembering that night in full detail every touch, whimper, and kiss.
"You never treated me different just because I was pregnant." Lauren says thoughtfully. "Even when I began to show sex was always... intense." She smiles faintly trailing her fingers across his jaw, "Even when she started moving you didn't protest having sex. You didn't treat me like I was going to break."
Sark kisses her head, "My girls are tough."
"What if it had turned out she wasn't yours?" Lauren asks suddenly. "What if I had been completely wrong?"
"We knew it Lauren"
"I know but what if..."
Sark strokes her back, "I'm not sure"
"Would you have disappeared? Or would you have waited around until the time was right for me to have another baby?"
"I have no idea. I never thought about that." He admits. "You did?"
"A few times" Lauren admits dropping her head on his shoulder she groans
"What?"
"I wish things had gone differently."
"Well we can't change the past."
"Mama"
Lauren sighs, "Just a minute Sophia." She reaches for her clothes and quickly dresses as Sark does the same but remains in front of the door to block the little girl from opening it. She runs her fingers through her hair then steps up to Sark kissing him lightly as he pulls his shirt on. She reaches for the door once he's dressed and pulls it open, "Hey sweetie good nap?"
Sophia nods holding her arms up.
Lauren picks Sophia up kissing her cheek.
"Where's Ian?" Sophia asks
"He's taking his nap as well." Lauren answers
"Why?"
"Because he's a baby and babies sleep a lot." Lauren replies
"I wish he could play." Sophia sighs
"I know but he's too little to do much playing." Lauren smiles
"What are you going to do now?" Sark asks
Sophia tilts her head, "Can I color?"
"Sure." Lauren sets Sophia at the kitchen table then walks to the kitchen desk and opens it. "What do you want coloring book or paper?"
"Both please."
"All right" Lauren grabs the crayons and sets them on the table. "There you go." She kisses Sophia's head.
"Thank you."
"What should we have for dinner?" Sark muses opening the refrigerator.
"Spaghetti" Sophia answers
"Spaghetti, huh?" Sark regards the contents of the freezer and refrigerator, "I think we have the ingredients."
"I still find it odd that you cook." Lauren muses as she sits at the table.
Sark shrugs "It was one of the ways I could relax. I didn't have to think about work or anything." He sets the hamburger meat on the counter. "I was never able to do much cooking up until I took the time off after I left."
"Oh"
"What else do you want to eat for dinner Soph?" Sark questions the little girl.
Sophia shrugs "I don't know." She continues coloring humming to herself.
Lauren smiles watching as her daughter colors, 'She's back where she belongs.'
TBC…
Almost done. Just a few more chapters.