Points of Authority
Hmm… Many of you have a really good point. At this point, this fic could be either EnvyxEd or EdxEnvy. So, I guess whichever you prefer is what you should take it as. Though I, personally, like EdxEnvy… So… Yeah…
Uh… nothing else really to say… Oh, the popular vote is to have Envy kill Dante, and, so far, it looks like Lust is goin' down, too. I'd still love to hear what you have to say, so keep giving me suggestions!
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The moment they stepped inside, Ed knew that it was going to be difficult getting through Headquarters without someone trying to shoot Envy. Or without Envy trying to strangle someone.
Military personnel swarmed around him, trying to get Ed and Al out of the way so they could have a clear shot at him. The State Alchemists immediately drew out pieces of chalk or put on their personalized gloves, preparing to attack. And through all the confusion, Envy was grinning.
One of the more reckless men lunged at him, attempting to take him down, but Envy simply kicked him into a wall, then turned and caught a man who had attempted to take advantage of the moment by the throat. Ed recognized the glint in his eyes, and quickly took off his boot and threw it at his head. It connected with a dull thud. Envy blinked, then dropped the guy, clasping his hands behind his back and giving Ed an 'it wasn't me' look.
Ed massaged his temples, then pushed a path through the momentarily stunned military men. Envy followed, head lowered like a puppy that's been scolded, and Al followed.
"You can't do that anymore, Envy! These guys are on your side now," Ed lectured.
"I forgot…" Envy muttered.
"Well, make it a point not to forget anymore," Ed grumbled, stopping and turning to glare at the taller man.
"I'll try. I'm not promising anything, though," Envy said stubbornly, crossing his arms. Ed massaged his temples. Suddenly, a brown-haired girl came running down the hall, then crashed headfirst (quite literally) into Ed.
"Ah! Sorry! I heard that there was a commotion at the front and I was just going to—" she began, but was cut off by Ed.
"You're a bit late on that one…" he commented, getting up and dusting himself off.
"… I am?" she asked.
"Yup. The perpetrator's right here," Envy said, pointing to himself. She gasped and jumped back, pointing.
"You're him! The… Uh… Oh, crap, what's your name…" she placed her head in her hand and her other hand on her hip, looking down. Envy's eye ticked in irritation.
"Thanks," he grumbled, glaring at her.
"You're the pineapple dude… Oh, come on… Uh… Uh…"
Envy's eyes widened, then took up a murderous glint. "Pineapple?" he asked dangerously. Ed and Al, meanwhile, were too busy trying to hold back hysterical laughter to warn the girl to run.
"ENVY! Yeah, that's it! You're a wanted criminal! … Hey… wait… Are you turning yourself in?" she asked, totally oblivious to the murderous glare that she was receiving from the "pineapple." Ed, who was briefly able to control his laughter, shook his head.
"No, he's switching sides," he managed to get out. A small chuckle escaped, unfortunately not going unnoticed by Envy.
"Think it's funny, O'Chibi-san?" he growled, advancing on the State Alchemist threateningly. There was utter silence, and then Ed broke out into hysterical laughter.
"Nope, sure looks like he doesn't, eh?" the girl said. Ed finally managed to control himself, then turned to give the girl an inquisitive look.
"I've never seen you around here before. Who are you?" he asked.
"Oh, my name's Laura. I'm a… uh… Well, I guess you could call it a new recruit, since I've only been here… for… Well, not long. You're Ed, right? The famous Fullmetal Alchemist?"
Envy shook his head, sighing. Ed, however, grinned. "Yeah, I am. How could you tell?"
She smiled. "I've always heard about how small you are."
Utter silence.
Suddenly, Envy began laughing hysterically, doubling over and clutching his stomach. Ed, on the other hand, had gone silent, eyes on the floor. (A/N- You know that thing in the anime? Where his eyes get all black and he gets tense? Yeah.) Al just sighed, waiting for his brother's outburst. Ed's head snapped up and he glared at Laura, who in turn just smiled, albeit somewhat sadistically.
"Well, anywho, I'm going to go see if there's any clean up or anything that needs doing. Later, Envy, Al… Pipsqueak," she smiled and ran off.
"WHO'REYOUCALLINGSOSMALLHEMAKESANANTFEELTALL!" Ed screeched, turning to lunge after her. Al managed to snag him around the waist, however, and Envy, still laughing, managed to snag his braid. Through a joint effort, they managed to drag him, still fuming, to Roy's office.
Envy politely knocked, then, without waiting for an answer, kicked the door open. He and Al threw Ed onto the couch, where he remained, arms crossed, glaring at the two of them for denying him his revenge. Roy looked pissed at Envy.
"You should've waited for a response," he said, as if Envy was listening.
"Yeah, shoulda, woulda, but I didn't, now did I?" Envy said in a casual tone, seating himself in one of the two chairs that sat in front of Roy's desk and crossing his legs. Roy glared at him. "Oh, what, it's not like I interrupted you in the middle of fucking First Lieutenant what's her face," he said, waving a dismissive hand. Both Roy and Riza paled. Envy noticed this and looked between the two of them. "Did I?"
"NO!" they both shouted. Envy sniggered.
"Then I don't see what the problem is, Mr. Snap-Happy. Now, why the hell did you call us up here? I was perfectly fine sleeping, but nooo…" Envy trailed off, rolling his eyes toward the ceiling, then looking levelly at Roy, who, in turn, glared flaming daggers at him.
"You three are going to take care of the other Homunculi once and for all," Roy stated, still glaring at Envy. The Sin's eyes widened, and he paled visibly.
"You're insane…" he muttered.
"Maybe, or are you too scared to do it?" Roy asked, a daring tone to his voice. Envy's eyes flashed.
"Fine. When, where, and how? More importantly when," he said.
"Never were able to turn down a challenge, were you?" Ed muttered darkly from his spot on the couch. Envy merely stuck his tongue out at him.
"You three are going to surprise them—" Envy scoffed, Roy ignored him and continued, interlacing his fingers, "—tonight, and I don't know what you're going to use. Two of you can use alchemy, one of you is indest—well, almost indestructible, so you'll think of something."
"Wow, is he always this concerned for his soldiers' safety?" Envy asked, his voice positively dripping with sarcasm. Ed grimaced.
"No, this is being cautious," he said.
"Oh. Wow. Dude, even Dante takes better care to prepare us. And that's saying something."
"What's it say?"
"That Roy sucks as a leader," Envy stated matter-of-factly. Ed sniggered, and Al shook his head.
"Envy…"
"What? He does. You can't tell me he—"
"Can we stop talking about what a bad leader I am and get on with this, please?" Roy interjected, twitching. Envy grinned, obviously enjoying the mental strain he was causing the Colonel, not to mention the physical strain caused by having to hold his hand in place to keep him from frying the Sin to a crisp.
"Yeah, yeah, sure, we'll try," Envy said, suddenly wary.
"Good. You are dismissed," Mustang said, waving them out with a casual gesture of his hand. The three got up, heading for the door. Just as Envy was about to close the door, the Colonel stopped them. "Oh. One more thing." Envy turned and raised a questioning eyebrow. "I will not allow you to die in my jurisdiction. Post-processing papers are a pain, you understand." Ed turned, incredulous, and Al continued pushing him down the hall. Envy threw him a glare that screamed "if I make it out of this alive, you're going to burn," and slammed the door.
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Okay, I lied. The next chapter will have ass kicking in it. Sorry… I didn't expect that to take so long…
Yeah, isn't Roy a bastard? I never did like him much… It isn't obvious, is it… -.- Probably just because there are way more RoyxEd than EnvyxEd fics out there… They don't work together… Ed so obviously hates him! … Yeah, because he likes Envy so much more…
Anyway, don't forget to comment, complain, compliment, or criticize! Still haven't gotten a flame, I'm honestly surprised… TWENTY FIVE left to go before I hit one hundred! You guys ROCK OUT LOUD! (I stole that from my friend. ) I LOVE YOU ALL!
Ja, mata!
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