~ 14 ~

Dr. Beckett released me the next morning, sending me straight to the kitchen to visit with my old work buddies, my food schedule in hand. He also requires me to inform him of any sudden bursts of energy I might have, especially if they leave me feeling euphoric or dizzy in their wake. I'm to keep a supply of protein bars on hand at all times as well as take a multi-vitamin.

Not to mention the ten pounds he insists I gain! Just please don't let it be in my ass. That'll throw a whole wrench into my triples.

This is really a pain. I've never kept a regular eating schedule. I prefer eating when I'm hungry. But that seems to be the whole problem. I don't eat when I'm hungry. So even if I can run, dance or skate faster than the other kids, I'm kind of like a Cheetah—not that one—the big cat. I get spurts but once the energy dissipates, I'm pretty much, well, Jell-O.

Who knew that wiggly substance would come in so handy as a metaphor?

It's been three days since my infirmary visit and I'm still waiting to hear from John about the particulars of our 'date'. Man, did that come out of left field. I know I should have said no…but I couldn't. Didn't want to. I'm so sick of feeling guilty because of what happened. Yes, in most likelihood, the two of us were probably never meant to be together. And yes, I know he's in deep with Dr. Weir. But I can't fight it anymore. I want the man constantly.

Some addictions you just have to learn to live with, I guess. This one's gonna be a real burden. Oh yeah, constant naked bliss…that's harsh.

Well, as of yet, there hasn't been any nakedness or bliss. We've spent some time together, in public places only, like the mess; occasionally touched digits, but no kissing or anything else for that matter. John's made it pretty clear he wants to start fresh—as in completely sex free—to see where this leads. Basically it's another one of his theories and though the last one didn't go so well, he might be on to something this time.

Still want to strip him naked on a moments notice though.

Yeah, I don't think that's ever gonna change. The man is scorching. But I still have my 'memories' to keep me…less anxious when I'm around him. Hey, I managed with the invisible clone for a long time before the real thing came around. I can deal for a while.

When I woke up in the infirmary I had this strange feeling. Not unfamiliar but at the same time completely foreign. I can't say it out loud let alone write it down, but I'm pretty sure why my headaches abated when I went to I-zoola. I wasn't completely dishonest with myself when I was there. I did have a great time and I didn't have nightmares…until that one. But I hadn't been paying attention either. It was the dreams that did it to me. Dreams of John…smiling.

They made me happy. I even caught myself giggling as I woke up. That's why I was so content on I-zoola even though I missed him terribly…he already had a hold on me.

I shake off the thought, it's still too much to handle and I don't want to jinx it. And I'm not being negative or overly sensitive. I'm realistic. My track record is not the best…and I'm kind of a bad luck magnet for other people.

Maybe not in this galaxy.

I can hope. The whole Jax thing still rings in my head and the dream of my parents—I didn't tell Dr. H. about that one—I can figure it out on my own pretty good. I must have been really starting to lose it for my subconscious to take on the actual role of Jax and try to beat some sense into me.

Pretty scary, really.

At least it worked. I think.

Yeah, I still chat with myself…in fact I've decided that Jax is not only my subconscious but also my id girl. She wants what she wants when she wants it and that's just how it is.

But there's still a niggling part in the back of my mind telling me Jax is dangerous…to me. It's a small part of my little voice. For all I know, it's Jax playing games—though I know she doesn't really exist, never has—something in me is Jax: hard, cold and full of rage. I really don't want to bring that part out…ever.

What if it could take over, completely?

A shudder runs through me at that thought. It's not possible, I'm sure. No one can lose themselves over to someone who doesn't exist. I mean, I've read about multiple personality disorder, but that only happens to kids not adults. And sure, I've done the whole dissociative thing, but it was completely non-violent—well except for the fist through the window and the piece of glass at my jugular—according to Ronon, I just sat there, staring.

Okay, enough of this. I simply have to shake it off. I have clients to knead into dough and a snack to scarf down.

"I hear you had a bit of a melt down," Laura snickers. "Mr. Man, Ronon Dex had to save you from a horribly cold shower?" She wobbles her brows suggestively. With a sigh and a roll of my eyes, I point her to the Oriental Screen. "Come on. You gotta give me something."

"He's basically my brother."

"Well, sweetie, you've got one hot brother. Plus the way he watches you. Mmm, that is intense." I point to the screen again. Laura shakes her head. "Always looking to get people naked, Jax. You should look into treatment for that. Or, at least, find a new hobby."

"Oh, I have."

"Really?"

"Yeah…it's called homicide. Wanna play?"

Laura giggles from behind the screen. "So…I see you've taken my advice."

"Which would be?"

"A scrumptious Lt. Colonel seems to be at your beck and call these days."

I can't stop the smile; it's kind of a reflex whenever I think of John. I've reconciled the fact that Col. John Sheppard is Johnny, darkness and all. Besides, the Colonel part is so hot. Whew! Have to fan myself a bit. But beck and call…"I wouldn't say that."

Laura comes around the screen wrapped in a towel. "No. I did. You're too quiet about such things." She sits on the table but doesn't lie down right away. "I caught you in the mess…" She wiggles her fingers at me, grinning slyly. "Holding pinky fingers under the table."

I open my mouth to protest but nothing comes out because I know she's right. The blush and the impending silly grin come out without my permission.

"Ahh. I knew it!" She improvises a half-dance on the table. "Jax got her man uh huh, Jax got the man uh huh uh huh." Laura tosses her carrot top head back and groans with delight. "Mmm, this is gonna kill Maddog!" Then she laughs. "Her poker face is gonna suck for a month! Gimme a high five."

I lift my hand, palm out and she slaps it. "Wait. Maddog likes Sheppard?" The laughter comes unbidden, uncontrollable.

"Dr. Morgan does too."

"Kat! God, is every woman hot for this man?"

"Please!" Her smile is huge. "Some of the men too." She lays face down on the table. "If this place was one of those orgy houses in Ancient Greece, we'd all be dancing around naked, feeding him grapes."

That gets me really rolling. I'm laughing so hard I get tears clouding my vision. Laura's good for that, making me cry through laughing. The image of John in a toga being fed grapes is…damn that's hot!

"Okay," Laura throws her arms out to the side of the table, flapping them a couple times then lets them drop to her sides with a slap. "Magic finger me."

"I am sorry to take up time," Dr. Zelenka says as I work on his lower back.

"That's what I'm here for, Radek. Besides. I owe you for the speakers on I-zoola."

"That is so much my pleasure, sweet lady. Seeing you bruslit ohromující I get husí kůže."

I have no ideas what he just said, but it sounds so pretty I smile anyway. I'm sure it was nice; he's always nice to me. "So how'd you hurt your back?"

"Proklatý kamínek blocks from the chrám…uh temple on PXT-705. I lift…but I do not stand, I fall over instead."

"You must bend you're knees, Radek. Or better yet, get a marine to bend his or her knees for you. You're a scientist not a heavy loader."

"And this is what I tell Dr. McKay…but does he listen?"

I shake my head as he says a long 'no'.

Lots of noise about this new temple zips through the city. It seems to be on everyone's mind. All the scientists are excited about the discovery. None so much as Dr. McKay of course. Apparently this unknown monument was a possible beta site for the Ancients during their war with the Wraith.

Col. Sheppard's team didn't find the site, however, which means Dr. McKay must be all kinds of put out that he wasn't on the research team from the beginning. However, he is now, to everyone's pleasure because he's been gone for two days, leaving us all in peace. Except for perhaps Dr. Weir who keeps getting 'urgent' calls from him for supplies.

When I open the door to leave the therapy room for the night, an arm strikes out in front of me and there's a beautiful green and yellow wild flower pinched in a rather masculine hand. A moment later, John spins away from the wall and stands in front of me, grinning. He's wearing the dangerous combination of black shirt, standard BDU's and dimples of utter destruction. He looks so yummy. "For the lady," he says with an exaggerated bow.

I'm stunned. I actually have to cover my mouth to keep from giggling with delight. He's so adorable. I firmly keep my smile in place as I take the flower. "Why thank you, kind sir." I can't believe I said that with a straight face.

He bends an arm, offering it to me. "Would the lady care to take a stroll before supper?"

I nod once. "The lady would." Me, a lady…now that's something Laura would get a kick out of. I drape my arm through his, we link elbows and I rest my hand on his forearm. He walks at a languid pace. I lean over. "So, is this it?"

"Is this what?"

I motion with the flower. "The date."

"Oh that…" He smiles to himself. "Let's see where this corridor takes us, shall we?"

"Oh, there you are!" Dr. McKay says as he comes around a corner at us. I take a deep breath and let it out hard.

John does the same but adds a groan. "Here I am, Rodney. What do you want?"

"Oh, sorry. Not you Colonel. Jax."

My brows shoot up. I glance at John then look back at McKay. "Me?"

He motions as he turns. "Come with me."

But I don't budge. I'm not ready to trade down so quickly. I mean, Sheppard's wearing his black shirt for gods sakes. Plus, this could be the date. The first of many I'm hoping. And I'm not about to let Dr. McSnarky screw it up.

He notices I'm not jumping at his order and stops with a huff, lifting his chin in that superior manner I find so annoying. His arms fold as he turns back to stare down his nose at me. "You're needed on PXT-705."

I scoff with a smile. "Like hell I am." McKay actually looks struck by my tone. His brows wrinkle and some of the steam seeps from his puffed up chest. John pats my hand as it rests on his forearm. I take that as a sign of encouragement. "I'm a masseuse, doctor. I work on Atlantis. And as of five minutes ago, I'm off-duty."

John grins, flashing dimples. "So am I. So if you don't mind…we have plans." With that, we start walking, by-passing McKay who spins in place to watch us go.

"Plans? What! This is important." He shuffles up behind us. I can feel the tension flowing from John. McKay manages to get ahead of us and stop us in mid stride. "We've uncovered a control panel…of some sort. It needs to be activated."

John taps McKay's chest. "So…go activate it."

McKay sighs and rolls his head. "I've tried. Don't you think I've tried? No one can get it working. I need someone with innate control over the gene. Someone…like Jax." He raises a finger. "Or you, Colonel. Either or, doesn't matter to me."

"You know I have a mission tomorrow, Rodney. Minus one team member."

"Which leads me back to my first choice of…Jax." His smile is slim but holds that frustrating haughty ego.

"He hasn't even finished the translation yet." I complain to Dr. Weir.

She crosses her arms and raises her brows at McKay. "Is that true, Rodney?"

"Well," he waves a hand in the air. "Partially…yes."

I toss a grin over my shoulder to John who's waiting outside the closed door. He wasn't invited into the pow-wow by yours truly because I didn't want Dr. Weir to think he was coming to my rescue…and therefore thinking I would use him against her.

I offered the woman solid advice to go after the man…gave her plenty of time too. And she did nothing. I can't feel guilty any more. I can't deny that I want him as much or more that she does. After all…she didn't go after him, did she?

McKay's fumbling through an explanation of why he needs me to go right now, but it all comes down to one fact. I hold up my hand in his face. "Ancient lust-o-rama device. Remember that little debacle? Hmm. I warned you." I point a finger so close to his nose his eyes cross. "Never again."

"But-"

"No!"

Dr. Weir shakes her head. "Rodney…Jax is a civilian…not a scientist. She can't be forced into service outside her parameters."

"But that's why she's here," he whines.

I cover a chuckle. "Not really." But Dr. Weir shoots me a look that tells me to keep quiet on that front. So I smack my lips together and stifle the grin.

Dr. Weir raises her hands. "How 'bout this. Rodney, you stay on Atlantis to finish the translation while the archeologists continue excavating. As soon as you complete the translation, Jax will join you at the site. I understand the temple is only a fifteen minute walk from the gate.

"But that could take days."

Dr. Weir flashes a half smirk. "Then I suggest you get started."

"And how can I be certain she'll actually come when I need her?"

I take a deep breath. "I promise to track my ass all the way out there to start your little doohickey once you can tell me exactly what it does…and if there are going to be any side effects."

"It's just a control panel."

I nod, glowering at him. "Yeah, and that other thing was just a communications device according to you."

"Well…I wasn't completely off." I glare at him and he huffs stiffly. "Fine."

I grin at Dr. Weir. "I'll be sure to pack the duct tape." Then I glare at McKay again. "Just in case."

Dr. Weir covers her mouth and coughs to kill the laugh. McKay sneers at me, but I grin and head out the door to where John is waiting. "I'm starving."

He grins, full dimples and I nearly melt right then and there.

~ 14.5 ~

John occasionally glances through the door into Elizabeth's office as Jax argues against Rodney. She's got some serious lungs on her.

Elizabeth didn't look the least bit upset to see him arrive with Jax. And Jax surprised him by relinquishing his arm the moment they came down the corridor. He questioned her with a look, but she smiled softly and started to walk ahead of him. Then she refused to let him come in the office to help argue her point. He's not used to standing on the sidelines like this.

Jax flashes him a quick grin over her shoulder and he relaxes. It's not like he went to a whole lot of trouble for the night, but he has been looking forward to it since he suggested they have a real date. Of course keeping hands off over the past few days has been all kinds of difficult. He just needs to be in her vicinity to be overcome by wanting her. But as she once said, that's what self-control is for.

And chaperones.

Jax doesn't know it, but John's scheduled a sort of double-date to try and keep their hormones in check. He talked Ronon and Teyla into joining them for dinner in the mess—not terribly romantic, but that's kind of the point, he wants to learn about Jax, not seduce her…yet—and the movie later. John even picked a chic flick from the new stash of DVD's brought back from Earth.

She finally comes out of Elizabeth's office, smiling slyly. "I'm starving."

John grins and ushers her away, not realizing for a moment that he has his hand on the small of her back. She shivers subtly from the touch and he gets a flash of memory from the last time they were together. He has to mentally scold himself as he takes a deep breath and calms his racing heart. This is going to be tough.

Ronon and Teyla are already seated when they arrive in the mess. They've chosen a table near the windows and away from the noise of the dinner crowd. John leads Jax to the chow line, his hand again landing at the small of her back. She turns slightly to him, looking up with wide eyes. "You do realize this is killing me," she says huskily.

John closes his eyes for a moment and breathes through his nose. "Not just you."

They grab trays and get in the buffet line, Jax in front of him. She grabs some food then turns to him again, her eyes locking on his. "So, on the first date it would be…wrong."

Even if the smoldering gleam wasn't in her eyes, sending all kinds of jolts through his body, he'd still know exactly what she was getting at. "Not…wrong. Just…okay, yeah, wrong. For us."

She nods, catching her upper lip with her teeth then sighs. "Self-control?"

John nods. "Exactly."

As in the infirmary, Jax pokes at her food a little before digging in. It's not bad and she doesn't make a face, but he notices she's taken large portions of everything and before eating her eyes open wide and she sighs. "If I get fat…blame Beckett."

Teyla and Ronon exchange amused glances. "Have you been feeling well, Jax?" Teyla asks.

"Better. Not hungry though…which I'm guessing is the whole point. But I still have plenty of energy to dance and skate."

"You should see the…Ariel?" Ronon says, looking to Jax as he pronounces the last word.

She nods. "That's not in the skate routine, sorry to say." She bobs her head. "I'm too chicken."

Teyla sighs. "I have not seen you dance or skate. I look forward to such a day."

Jax smiles at her. "Soon, I hope." She pokes at the meat then she turns to John. "What's the one junk food you miss most out here?"

"Pizza," he says easily. "With everything on it."

She shoves a huge bite into her mouth and chews. Her face takes on a dreamy quality. "Mmm," Jax says. "Pepperoni and pineapple."

John watches her. "What are you doing?"

She swallows and grins. "Eating pizza. No mushrooms…extra sauce."

"Right," he nods. "Or anchovies." That sounds really good right now. He looks at her again. "You can do that?"

"Do what?" Ronon asks.

"Substitute memory for what I'm actually ingesting." She nods to the side. "Comes in handy, especially with vegetables."

"Weird," John says softly. Her smile falters and he instantly qualifies his statement. "Not you…just…that must be weird. In a cool way."

Jax grins. "Good catch. Doesn't always work, but sometimes, I get lucky."

"When did you learn to do this?" Teyla asks.

Jax eats some more and bobs her head again as she swallows. "College."

"Oooh, interesting topic," John adds, nudging her elbow. "So, Jax…what sorority did you pledge?"

She chuckles. "Just because I was a cheerleader doesn't automatically make me a sorority sister."

"I still can't get over you being a cheerleader," John sighs trying his best not to re-imagine all those naughty thoughts that plagued him the first time he gleaned this information from her the other day. "Thought you'd be a shoo-in."

She shrugs. "No time, even if I had the inclination, which I never did. Besides, I was too young…they would have hated me."

"Too young?" Teyla asks.

"Yeah… I graduated from high school early." She motions to her head. "Memory came in real handy with that."

John leans forward. After all the questions and all their time together, he still doesn't know how old she is. She's never offered and though he's tried to wheedle it out, he hasn't been successful. John's starting to worry he's really robbing the cradle with this one. After all…she was heading for the Olympics in '98…teens do that.

Oh, man…what if she's younger than Teyla? I'm a dead man.

She doesn't seem to notice his thought process though because she answers the question quickly. "Fifteen."

"Is that young?" Teyla asks.

Jax nods. "Earth kids usually graduate at seventeen or eighteen."

"I see."

"Aced my SAT's and got a full ride to college."

"Full ride?" Ronon asks.

John sips his drink. "She didn't have to trade for it."

"Oh…like a present," Teyla says. "Yes?"

Jax nods. "Yes."

"What was your major?"

She narrows her eyes on John. "I think it's someone else's turn to ask a question." John gives her his best puppy dog face and she shakes her head, but smiles. "Political science."

Now his brows shoot up. What? "Really?" How much more like Elizabeth can she be? And shouldn't I be creeped out by that comparison…or at least feel guilty?

She nods as she takes a drink. "Mmhmm. I wasn't planning on pursuing it, I mean, what bachelors degree even back then is worth the paper it's printed on. But it looked good on the bio for the Olympics." She looks to John before he can ask another question. "When did you decide to be a pilot?"

"The first time I rode on Space Mountain."

"I love roller coasters!"

John can't contain the grin that spreads over his face.

"So what movie are we viewing this evening?" Teyla asks as the four of them stroll into the rec room. Ronon and Jax are carrying the two bowls of popcorn, poking at each other with their elbows, just like real siblings. John's the last one in and places a handwritten 'do not disturb' sign on the door before letting it close. He signed the note Lt. Col. Sheppard just to be on the safe side. "It's a romantic comedy," he says, picking the DVD up off the table.

Jax eyes him suspiciously as she sets the popcorn down. "You like romantic comedies?"

"Well…I figured….you-"

Jax grins. "That I'm a girl." John nods and shrugs a shoulder. Her smiles widens. "Why don't you pick something you'd like to watch."

"I do…want to see-"

That single brow arches and her jaw slides to the side. "John?"

He grabs the box from the corner and digs through it. "They're all pretty old. The PTB on Earth don't like to spend a whole lot on these things…hey…Alien."

"Cool," Jax squeaks and he does a double-take on her. She shrugs as he stares. "What? I can't be a scifi fan? I'm living on an alien planet in a whole new galaxy…doesn't get more scifi than that." With a big grin, John grabs the movie and gets it set up to play.

"What's this about?" Ronon asks as he drops heavily onto the sofa near the middle, already stuffing a fistful of popcorn into his mouth.

"You'll see," Jax slides a sideways smirk to John with a quick shake of her head stopping him from giving away any of the plot.

John nods, grinning to himself. Before the movie starts, he opens the ice chest he stashed earlier. "Beer anyone?" Both Teyla and Ronon take one, so does John.

"Oh," Jax says. "No thanks."

John's brows rise. "You don't like beer?" Important life issue. Good to know.

She shakes her head, her upper lip curling a just a little. "Sorry. Got any sodas or water?"

John grins, pulling out a couple cans. She chooses the Dr. Pepper with a satisfied smile then plops onto the sofa next to Ronon. Teyla sits on the other side of the big man which leaves Jax's left side free. John hits play then turns off the lights before joining the others.

The couch is pretty big, but as soon as John sits down, Jax scoots away from Ronon so she can prop her feet upon the man's knee and leans into John. She glances up. "Do you mind?"

John smiles, taking a sip of beer. "No."

Her brows rise. "You're sure. I could always-" she starts to edge closer to Ronon but John grabs her around the waist with his right arm and tugs her close to him. "We'll be fine," he whispers and she chuckles lightly. John catches a smirk from Teyla to Ronon. As the movie starts, he whispers into Jax's ear again. "Okay, what I've learned so far. You're a closet geek who doesn't drink."

She looks up at him again, this time with wide eyes. "Oh…I like to drink…just not beer."

"Really?"

"And not tequila." She waves a hand. "Unfortunate margarita incident in college thing."

"Do tell."

"Shhh. Movie's starting."

As they watch the movie, John notices Jax is more interested in seeing Ronon and Teyla jump at various scary parts, which they do, though both try stoically to hide their reactions. Alien is a classic horror flick for that exact reason. Plus the creature is so cool. Whenever Ronon gets a good shock, John can feel Jax giggle silently. "That's not nice," he whispers.

"Are you kidding me?" She whispers back. "It's better than the movie. And I love this movie."

Both of them catch sight of Teyla nearly jumping into Ronon's lap at the end when the alien attacks Ripley. Her hand flies to clutch her heart as well. When the credits roll, Teyla sighs heavily. "Who knew such creatures exist!"

"They don't," Jax says. "It's movie magic."

"Magic?" Teyla asks.

Jax wrinkles her brows at John and bites her bottom lip. "You wanna explain special effects or should I?"

"Special effects," Teyla says. "This is what that other movie…Galaxy Quest explained."

"Exactly," John says with a grin. He's glad she remembers. The last conversation lasted longer than the movie itself.

Jax slips her feet from Ronon's leg and leans over to touch his arm. "Ronon? You're awfully quiet."

His brows are tightly creased and his jaw muscle twitching. "I would not have beaten that creature," he growls with a hint of anger.

Jax raises a brow towards John, smiling slyly. "Me neither, man," John says, patting the guy on the shoulder as he gets up to turn on the lights. "Aren't you glad we only have to battle the Wraith."

Ronon nods firmly. "Yes."

"Do we have Aliens?" Jax asks full of hope.

"There are more?" Teyla asks, her voice a bit shaky.

Jax nods enthusiastically. "Sequel. Totally cool. The Marines kick ass or try to."

"Not the Air Force?" Teyla's brows shoot up as she looks to John.

John makes a face and nods. "I'm sure the Air Force would have done just fine." He smiles at Jax. "I'll look…for next time." She grins and nods. "So," he starts, settling back onto the sofa. "Tell me about this college incident involving tequila."

Jax tells the story in such a way that even Teyla and Ronon are able to picture exactly what happened. She equates tequila to the Athosian spiced wine, though not in taste, only after effects.

John holds up a finger and his brows knit in confusion. "Didn't you say you graduated high school at fifteen?" Jax nods, her eyes filling with amusement. John watches her carefully. "And when did you graduate college?"

"I just turned nineteen." Her smile is small but playful.

Okay, so she graduated college before entering witness relocation…which didn't happen until '98. Add eight years…so the youngest she can be is 27. Not too terribly…cradle robber! "And what year was that? You're graduation year."

"Hhmm…you know…?" She clucks her tongue. "Can't seem to recall that particular information." Her smile is slim and her eyes full of challenge.

John decides to change tactics for now. "And this…tequila incident happened…when?"

"Senior year."

John narrows his gaze on her. "How'd you get so drunk…being under age?"

"Oh that…" She quirks her mouth into the cutest pucker. "Fake ID."

With mock indignation, John says, "That's illegal, you know."

"How do you think I met Tony?" She tosses a glance to Teyla. "My first boyfriend was a cop."

Teyla's eyes widen. "Cop? Oh, law enforcement?"

Jax nods, but her smile has lessened with the mention of her boyfriend and John can see Ronon's not thrilled by the name either.

Wait a minute…first boyfriend was the cop…that shot her? That means she's only been with one other…

Oh, boy. John shakes off the thought. He clears his throat and hopefully the slight tension in the air. "How much older did that ID make you anyway?"

"Three years."

John nods. He highly doubts his next question will get an answer. "So, what was the date of birth you used?" Jax grins again and shakes her head slowly, playing with him. She's not going to give up her age anytime soon. It'll probably be the one secret she never voluntarily gives up.

Maybe he could work it out of her…one of these days he'll have to try that. He has his ways of making her...say things. Before getting carried away with the memories of a naked Jax, John decides to give up on the conversation for now. He shrugs and concedes the point about tequila being evil. "I can't drink it either," John says. "Similar incident."

Jax's brows arch and a sly smile plays at her lips. She glances at Teyla and Ronon then back at him. But it's Teyla who asks the question that turns him red and makes them all laugh. "You celebrated with many women, sang karaoke and hit on men as well?"

"No…what I mean…Jax, c'mon."

She holds up her hands. "You dug yourself into that one, Sheppard." Her eyes twinkle with delight, it's a look he hasn't seen before, but one he hopes to see again. He laughs at his own expense. He hasn't been this relaxed in ages. He feels like all the weight of the galaxy has been lifted from his shoulders for a little while and it's really nice.