Disclaimer- Look, if I owned the rights to Harry Potter, would I write here? Didn't think so.

HermioneDouble1- Hello my friends. It is I, creeping back out of my retirement caused by the slave drivers otherwise known as teachers. I promised to finish this story, and I always keep my promises, so here I am. I must confess after my many years of being the ultimate Not-So-Much-Harry-More-Ron-Fan, I have lost enthusiasm for all things Potter (please don't shoot me!) Instead I have discovered some books called His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman. READ THEM. Also, Little Women by Louisa May Alcott. Anyway, on with this story.

Ginny-Star- Just so you know, I have tried to do the seventh chap on my own, but it got kinda lonely so I waited until I bugged HD1. It worked in the final buggering end.

HermioneDouble1- Oh shut up Ginny, you Lord of the Rings lover!

Ginny-Star- Shh! You might set them on me! *indicates reviewers*.

Hermione Double1- Mwahahahahaaa!!

Yours, Lataz!

HD1. G-S

Things That Go Bump In The Night Part 2

Nope, no daisies yet. Shame really, I could perhaps have picked them and given them to Hermione (ahem...)

Great.

Just bloody awesome great.

Now Ginny's mad at me, and I'm sure she's got something up her sleeve. Plotting to reveal that I used to wet my bed or something. That is definitely NOT good.

Ginny had that look again. The "I'm so gonna embarrass you," look. God I HATE that look. Her lips began to part…..

'Come on, let's go upstairs,' said Harry. Thank god! She didn't have chance to take the piss of me in front of 'Mione! Woooo!

Not that she hasn't before….. God, I hate her, I really do.

We excused ourselves and ascended the stairs as fast as possible so as not to be put through the great act of teen-abuse: degnoming, or any other such chore that result in my great embarrassment caused by being pushed over after the re-massing of those stupid little sods. Jesus, that was embarrassing.

We creaked up the rickety stairs and reached my room. I know she's been in my room a million times before, but I'm still afraid she'll stumble across some of my dirty underwear or the like, so I entered first making sure there was no incriminating evidence which would cause embarrassment to me.

Hermione and Harry entered straight after, and something caught my eye. One of my, err, rather adult magazines is lying on the floor, right next to Hermione's foot.

Bugger!!!

What the hell am I supposed to do? It doesn't look as if she's spotted it, thankfully, but the witch (wearing nothing but her pointy hat) is waving and winking at an oblivious Hermione.

'What d'you reckon, Ron?' Ahhh. That chest! (erm… I mean the porn stars, yeah…no, not Hermione's. Definitely not Hermione's.) Hold on…. what was she talking about?

'Huh?' Oh, great answer, Ron. Prat.

'About- OH MY GOD! PORN!! RON YOU SICK, SICK CHILD!!!'

How the hell do I get out of this one?!?

Harry's there smirking. Jesus, you could help, you stupid grinning idiot!

Hegh-bleurgh...nyeah!!

My brain doesn't seem to be working!! Grr, why is it always me?

'Do you realize how disgusting that is Ronald Weasley? I can't believe you! I would maybe have expected it from Fred or George…..' She spat, an appalled look on her face

Finally, my brain's working.

'Hey, who said it was mine? Harry shares this room too, you know. It's definitely not mine!' GO ME! Shove blame on Harry, Hermione yells at him, I get away with it, I get the girl!

Or not, whatever.

Harry looks like he's been hit over the head with his own broomstick. Mind you, a Firebolt is renowned for having a very well polished handle, makes the broom practically unbreakable!

'You bloody liar Ron!! It's not mine!' he yelled, after what seemed like a very long moment.

'ThenitmustbeFredandGeorge'stheyprobablyputitthereonpurposetoembarrassme!' Did she even understand that? Saying 15 odd words in 2 nanoseconds is quite difficult y'know.

'And why would they do that?' she said, her hands on her hips.

'God, you really don't know my brothers well, do you?'

Silence answered me. With a scowl on her face, (her pretty, pretty face….. ergh! Bad thoughts about my best friend!) she whirled around and left the room, slamming the door into place.

With a relieved sigh, I flung myself onto my bed and moaned. Now Hermione thinks I'm a sex crazed, hormonally charged boy!

Err….ok. Maybe she's right. Hey- maybe that's the reason I'm having all these deluded thoughts about her! I'm 16 and the nearest I've ever got to undoing someone's bra was Eloise Midgeon's in 2nd year and my wand did that for me.

'Bloody girl thinks she know everything!' Harry laughed and sat down on the recently conjured second bed in the room.

'You know you love her really, Ron.' What the hell How does Harry know- er, I mean, rudely assume that?!?

'What d'you mean, love her? I don't love Hermione! No way in hell would I ev-'

'Ron!' he cut in, 'It's just a saying! A phrase!' Oh. Well, I didn't know did I? I mean, he might have been serious, right?

'Yeah, yeah.'

Looking up, I could see that Harry had THAT look on his face. Yeah, the I know something you don't know! look.

'What?' I said, trying not to sound suspicious.

'Y'know, isn't it kinda odd how you got so worked up about it? I mean, surely you must have realized I was only kidding!' Not good, not good, not good, not good.

'Night Harry.' With that, I turned the lights off and crawled under the covers of my bed.

I don't fancy Hermione. I really don't. Yeah, she's got a great arse, and she's pretty- in a sort of way. And she's clever, but doesn't that work against me? Anyway, she's with Thicky Viky now, so what does it matter? Bloody stupid git with big eyebrows and calling her Herm-O-Ninny or whatever. It's a bloody easy name to say! What does she see in him? Ugly prancing twa……

Anyway.

What time is it? Wonder if Harry is asleep yet or not…..

Oh, yes he is. I can hear his bloody snoring.

Well, I'm bored, awake and thirsty. Water! Water is good. Oh look, I'm babbling. Oh look! Now I'm talking to myself! Oh, I'm still doing it….

Not bothering to turn the light on, I went down the steps into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of water, using only the light from the moon coming in through the window.

Aren't I a clever boy!

Ouch… okay, so wandering around in the dark is maybe not such a good thing.

BAM!

Well, there goes my water.

'Oh god, sorry!'

'Ron! You've got water all over me!' Oh, it was Hermione! What was she doing down here? And so I asked her.

'I was hoping to get a bit of fresh air, but I don't quite fancy going out in a wet nightie!' she snapped, wringing the water from her, er, night thingy. She looks quite pretty right about now!

'Well I said I was sorry!'

'Sorry? SORRY?'

'Shh!!!' I put a hand on her mouth, glancing up at the ceiling, terrified.

'Shut up for goodness sakes! You want everyone down here?' Apparently, it was 'Yes' from the way Hermione was looking at me.

Oh crap! Someone's coming down the stairs!

Taking my hand away from her mouth (shame, really), I spun around. What do I do? Argh!

Obviously, Hermione had a better idea- or so it seemed. She started going towards the stairs, but then (clumsy girl) slipped on the watery ground. Her hand flailed out and (yep, you guessed it) grabbed me and managed to pull me on top of her. Way hey! Or, it would be if it was any other time.

Time seemed to stop as I gazed into her warm, quizzical eyes, and a slight flush appeared on her cheeks.

'What's going on here then?' Oh GOD! K It's Fr- no, Geor- no, ah, one or the other! Forge (we'll call him) leaned against the door frame and grinned broadly, curse him.

I hate him, I really do.

What do I do now???

***

Ginny-Star- There you go! A new chapter! Not very good, I'll admit, we're a bit rusty¡K

Hermione Double1- Yes, but here is chapter! Also, notice how it is a bit longer then what we usually write!

Ginny-Star- Yes! See! We are good! Please note, the 'porn' in this chapter was only intended to be funny, not to disgust anyone! Blame Hermione Double1!

Hermione Double1- No no, blame Scriv. (Scriv: a lad who likes to tell me, ahem, things he has seen on films. Particularly 13 erotic ghosts….apparently it would be a good comedy if not for all the rampant lesbian sex.).

Ginny-Star- Next chapter… sometime in the year! No, don't kill me!