BEAUTIFUL DISASTER
DISCLAIMER: Don't own nada. Hold on…nup, still nothing.
PAIRING: Tate, duh!
A/N: Just a quick one-shot I've had floating around in my head. Based on the Kelly Clarkson song Beautiful Disaster. Story takes place 45 minutes into SWAK. You get the idea.
Kate sat on the other side of the glass box, staring straight ahead. An hour earlier she had been on the other side, beside him. But his situation had worsened. The doctors seemed more worried. They didn't tell her much, but she could tell from the look on their faces that it wasn't good. A tear trickled down her face as she watched Tony sleeping.
He drowns in his dreams
An exquisite extreme, I know
He's as damned as he seems
And more heaven than a heart could hold
And if I tried to save him
My whole world could cave in
It just ain't right, it just ain't right
In the past hour she'd thought a lot about their relationship. He annoyed the hell out of her, but she wouldn't have it any other way.
It sounded weird, but somehow she couldn't imagine her life without him. Not that she felt that way about him. Actually, to be perfectly honest, she wasn't exactly sure how she felt about him. Tony was…Tony.
Oh and I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster?
Kate often wondered about Tony. At work, he seemed so in control over everything. When he was working, he was totally focussed on doing his job. They all were. That was a good thing about their relationship. There was a time for stuffing around and a time to work and they knew that if they crossed that boundary, they would have to suffer the consequences from Gibbs.
He's magic and myth
As strong as what I believe
A tragedy with
More damage that a soul should see
And do I try to change him?
So hard not to blame him
Hold on tight, hold on tight
Kate was awoken from her daydream by one of the doctors. She put her hand on her shoulder and smiled down at her reassuringly. Kate looked away. She didn't need this woman's pity. She needed for Tony to be all right. He needed to be strong, not only for himself, but for her.
Come on, Tony. I need you. Just like you need me.
Oh and I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster?
It was times like these that made Kate hate life. Life was so unmerciful, uncontrollable and unpredictable. It could lift you up on a beautiful high, making everything seem perfect…and then you'd come crashing back to earth, just like that. That was the reason she hated God as a kid. She never understood why it was God's will that her parents fought all the time and her older brother was killed in a car accident. Sunday School taught her that if she were a good Christian, God would love her and look after her. Bull shit. Her family was breaking apart. Some sort of love.
It was happening again. Life was taking everything she loved and destroying it, right in front of her very eyes. She looked at Tony, lying there, unconscious. Her love destroyed him, just like it destroyed her family. No one deserved that.
I'm longing for love and the logical
But he's only happy hysterical
I'm waiting for some kind of miracle
Waiting so long, waited so long
It's funny how in times like these, a person undergoes some real soul searching. Kate wished things had been different. She wished she'd been able to brush away her insecurities and give her and Tony a shot. God knows they had all the perfect opportunities. She knew in her heart that their constant flirting and teasing had been a guise for how they really felt about each other. It took times like these for Kate to realise that what she'd been looking for all along was right in front of her. There was no perfect guy, but Tony came pretty damn close. He made her feel…perfect.
He's soft to the touch
But frayed at the ends he breaks
He's never enough
And still he's more than I can take
Kate couldn't take it anymore. She started sobbing softly, blocking out everything around her. She had to hold on to her last shred of hope. For both of them
Oh and I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster?
She stared at his peaceful form, a smile on his lips.
In her heart, she knew everything was going to be all right.