I Always See

by Ishikawa Ran

They think he can't hear it but he does... They think he can't see it but he does... He always sees... StanxRukaxEpros

I Always See

By: Ishikawa Ran

Summary: Epros and Stan secretly fight over Ruka, but neither of them are aware how much it's hurting the poor boy. Ruka just wants them to get along… but how on earth is he going to choose…?

à--o--ß

"Who are you to say who my slave likes best! Foolish ex-Evil King!"

"I have much more thought than thee, Ruka clearly prefers ME!"

It was hushed shouting. It was only hushed because the very unfortunate boy they were arguing about was lying in the next bed over. They didn't want Ruka to hear any of what they were saying, for fear of neither of them winning his affection…

But Ruka heard everything. He always heard everything. Every insult thrown back and forth, every claim made by either of the blondes, every last word… Occasionally, when one would finally fall asleep, the one left awake would come over and touch Ruka's face gently. Each touch was nearly the same. Ruka had learned to tell whom was who, as well. The soft feathery touch, that almost seemed hesitant… That was Epros. It was coupled with a small kiss on the forehead. The gentle hand on his cheek and the hesitant breath by his ear… that was Stan. Epros was hesitant to touch his face… Stan was hesitant to kiss him… That's how it always went. They had no idea how alike they really were.

And they had no idea what they were doing to Ruka's heart.

Every insult that the two said hurt him greatly… just to hear how much hate he was causing by just existing… It felt horrible. He always laid on his side, back facing the two to avoid being found out. And he never was.

Finally, the harsh whispers died down and silence followed after for a few minutes. Ruka stayed right where he was, waiting for one of the two to come to him once again. Finally, he heard shuffling from one of the other beds… and felt a hesitant touch on his face. 'Epros…' Sure enough, a lock of curly blonde hair drifted into his line of vision as the magician leaned down and kissed his forehead.

"Ruka…"

Ruka' eyes shut instantly… had he noticed that he was awake…? Ruka swallowed the lump in his throat and waited for him to say something else…

"Dear boy I realize thou art not aware… But feelings for you… Stan and I both share…" Ruka sighed in relief… he hadn't been found out. "I wish I could inform thee of my heart's aching need… but I fear my feelings, you simply will not heed…" I hear a sad twinge in his voice. "If… Stan is right… and you love him… do not forget about me…"

Ruka blinked slightly… What happened to Epros' rhymes…? He sounded so sad… Ruka's heart twisted again. More pain caused by Ruka just being there… his bottom lip quivered slightly, and he held back a sob.

"Sleep well, my beautiful infatuation…" Epros said. More shuffling was heard, and silence once again filed the room.

About an hour later, Ruka sat up from his bed and turned around to watch the others sleep. Stan was curled up on his side, a saddened look on his face. Epros was seep on his back, head tilted light to the left, tear stains on his pale cheeks. Ruka bit his lip and looked down… they both looked… so distressed. He stood quickly and left the room… He needed a walk.

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Epros awoke the next morning and sat up slowly, a small yawn on his lips. Stan had moved around during the night and was angling partially off of his bed. Epros blinked and smirked lightly. "What a clumsy fool, this king… He can't even do such a simple thing?" He shook his head and turned towards Ruka' bed… to find it empty. He narrowed his eyes and stood quickly, leaving the room in a flash. "Ruka! Where are you?" he tried not to sound frantic, but it wasn't working.

Stan flipped out of bed and landed hard on the floor. "Ow!" He growled and sat up. He'd heard the frantic call and stood quickly. "What's wrong with Ruka!" He shouted at the ex-Evil King, racing out after him.

Epros turned towards the voice. "I cannot find Ruka! He just… left!"

Stan growled. "What did you do!"

Epros growled slightly as well, uncharacteristic of him. "How dareth thou accuse me of this!" He shouted. "If anyone should hold guilt it is thee! For you could be the only one to cause him to flee!"

Stan shouted at the Phantom and threw him against a wall. "HOW DARE YOU!"

"STOP!"

Both blondes stopped on a dime and turned swiftly towards the source of the scream. "Slave! You're all right!" He let go of Epros' collar and walked towards the boy.

"Dear boy, you had me worried…"

"Both of you just… stop… No more fighting… I-I can't stand it anymore…"

Epros and Stan froze and shared a glance at each other. "We'll cease the bouts if thou wishes it, dear friend. Though I know our rivalry of strength shan't end."

Stan sighed. "As long as he doesn't annoy me, I won't bother him… What are you complaining for slave?"

"T-That's not… what I meant…" Ruka whispered, dropping to his knees. "Stop fighting… over me…"

Both older males froze once again and could only watch in nervousness as the boy slowly made his way to their room and shut the door, locking it. Epros' face twisted in sadness again and he gazed at the ground. "H… He is aware of our nightly fight… Stan we must work to set this right…"

"No shit, really?" Stan said sarcastically. Epros glared at him.

"That is the fact that our Ruka loathes. Us and our horrible insults in droves…" He crossed his slender arms and leaned against the wall, slowly drifting from the air to set his feet firmly on the ground. "How shall we fix this…? It seems much too hard. I'm aware this can't be fixed with a flip of my card…"

Stan smirked. "Like usual…?" Epros simply continued to stare at the ground. "Hey, phantom… Do you think this means he doesn't prefer either of us…?"

Epros sighed. "I'm not sure though I think we should learn for ourselves. We must find the one in whose heart Ruka delves."

Stan twitched slightly. "Can you quit with the rhyming for two seconds please…?" Stan groaned, sitting on the floor and leaning against the wall as well. "You're going to make me go crazy and hear the damn things everywhere…" Stan silently wanted to do what Ruka wanted… Just this once… He wanted to stop fighting, for Ruka's sake. But that outcome was looking more and more dim on the horizon.

Epros' eyes flared angrily, and he floated again, perching himself in front of the Evil King and grabbing his collar, again, uncharacteristic of him. "Listen you foolish Evil King. Ruka wants us to stop quarreling. Thou art only succeeding in making it worse. Thou do nothing more than fuel this curse, I'm trying not to raise my voice at you and, though it is complex, I seem to be doing a lovely job, and you vex. If you could just learn to shut your mouth for once and think about others besides yourself, you may be able to sustain too. Thou wish for me to cease my rhyming for you?" He let go of Stan's oddly shaped collar and floated back away from him. "Think on that for a bit of time, and maybe, once more, I'll cease my rhyme." He said, and he proceeded to disappear.

And think Stan did.

à--o--ß

Ruka sat by the window of the room in the inn and sighed as he watched the setting sun. He knew that meant the others would be getting tired soon and Stan and Epros would, once again, be in the room. He bit his lip an buried his face in his arms.

Epros quietly appeared behind the boy and hugged himself, as if cold. The boy looked so sad… "…Ruka…?" The boy jumped and Epros looked down in apology. "I am sorry my dear friend… Do you have a message to us you wish to send?"

Ruka swallowed the lump that had gathered in his throat and shook his head. "N-No… s-sorry…"

Epros drifted close to the boy and sat next to him, wrapping a hesitant arm around the boy's shoulder. "Oh, dear one, you need not be sad… We will work this out so it will not end bad…" Ruka shivered and Epros quickly removed his arm. "M-My apologies once more my friend… I cannot seem to bring my guilt to an end…"

Ruka shook his head. "I-I'm not... depressed because of that… J-Just that fact that… b-because I exist… I'm causing so much hate… so much fighting…" The youth sobbed lightly and buried his face in his arms again. "I-If I wasn't here… None of this would be happening…"

Epros smiled slightly. "And Beiloune would have gotten away with his scheme…" His rhymes dropped and Epros hugged the boy gently. Ruka sighed lightly and shrugged. Epros sighed as well. "Oh, don't doubt yourself… without you, none of us would be here… We'd all still be under the influence of the 'classifications'… I thank you very much for that Ruka…" He whispered. He tilted Ruka's face up to his slowly and he smiled. "Ruka… may I kiss you…?"

Ruka blushed lightly as he looked into the phantom's eyes and looked down a bit. "I-If… If you want…" He whispered. His green eyes closed timidly. Epros' own, crimson ones closed as well and he moved forward, gently pressing his lips against the youth's. Ruka felt something inside of his flutter, and he gasped and pulled away.

Epros blinked as he pulled away. "Is… Is something amiss…?"

Ruka shook his head. "N-Not really… s-something's… missing… I-I don't know what it is…"

Epros nodded slightly. "I do understand my boy… With your heart, I shall not toy…" He said, backing away and drifting towards the door. "I shall see you in the morn. With your words my heart is not torn… I bid you goodnight, love…" Epros' form became transparent and finally disappeared.

Ruka wanted to call the other back, but a knock at the door stopped him. "Ruka? Is Epros in there? Come on, slave; open the door!"

Ruka opened the door slowly and shook his head. "Epros isn't here…" He said, blushing lightly at the other.

Stan sighed slightly and walked inside the room and shut the door behind him, locking it. "Ruka I need to talk to you…" He said kneeling in front of the boy, now at eyes level. Ruka was about to ask what, but he was interrupted by Stan's lips. His eyes widened and he got that same feeling again… But, again, something was missing.

Ruka gently pushed the other away and looked down, thinking slightly. "S-… Stan…" He bit his lip.

Stan closed his eyes and sighed. "It's Epros isn't it…? You love him, don't you?" He sat back on the bed nearby and shook his head. "Is it because I can't get along with him…? Or is it because I'm not all too keen on the thought of you with anyone else…?"

Ruka shook his head. "I-It's not…" He narrowed his eyes slightly. "I-I think I know… what's missing…"

Stan blinked and cocked his head to the side. "What's missing? What do I have to get for you that will make you love me…"

"I already love you…" Ruka whispered. He smiled lightly and looked up at the taller male. "But I love Epros too. That's what's missing. When I'm with you, Epros needs to be there too… And when I'm with him, I want you there as well…" Tears slowly hid his smile. He dropped to his knees and bit his lip. "B-But… neither of you… want to be around each other… I-I have to choose… a-and I can't… I-I can't choose… P-Please… can I just be alone right now…?"

Stan stood still as he tried to take everything in. A small frown made it's way to his face as he nodded, leaving the room. Epros stood outside the room and crossed his arms. "Well? Won't you tell me? What did he say? To gain his love, what is his way?"

Stan shook his head. "We have to get along…"

Epros groaned. "Yes, I know this, but who is he for? Who's heart does he long for down to his core?"

Stan laughed quietly and shook his head. "Both of us."

Epros' eyes widened slightly after they blinked. His mouth opened much like a fish, over and over again until he could finally find his voice. "W-… What…?"

Stan nodded. "That's what he said…"

Epros leaned against a nearby wall for support. "T-That's… wow… I wasn't… exactly… expecting that…" He said, shakily, not even in the right mind to rhyme the moment.

"That's what I was thinking…" Stan closed his eyes in deep thought and sighed. "How are we supposed to… go about fixing this…?"

"Well, if he wants us both the same, I suppose we end this game." Epros said, finally regaining his composure and looking down at his feet.

Stan quirked an eyebrow. "What game?"

Epros roiled his eyes. "Oh, of course you know what I imply… Our fights that we have must simply die."

Stan growled. "Yeah, and how the hell do you expect to do that!"

"Do not raise your voice at me! You're such a fool, I do decree!" Epros shot back. They continued to bicker at each other and finally, two hands pushed Stan from behind. Both blondes' eyes widened greatly at this…

…Because both pairs of lips pressed against each other.

Rosalyn's voice floated through the air as she made herself known. "That could be a decent way to end a fight." She giggled and left for her own room.

Silence filled the hallway, and, finally, both of the men pulled away from each other. Neither pair of eyes had gone back to normal. The first who spoke up was soon followed by the next when one was gutsy enough to talk.

"Did you…?" It was Stan.

"…Feel that…?" Followed by Epros.

"Yeah…"

Silence settled over them again as they both looked down at their feet.

"It felt…" Stan again.

"…The same…"

"As with Ruka…" This was said by both at the same instant… They shared a glance, and one looked down slightly, that one being Epros.

"We owe Ruka oh so much… How will he react with our combined touch…?"

Stan shrugged slightly and stood straight, walking to Ruka's door. "Should we go in now…?"

Epros stood as well and smoothed out his shirt and his long flowing vest. "I…" He coughed and decided to try and make this better than it already was. "Now would be… a lovely time…"

Stan smirked slightly. "I'm impressed… you didn't rhyme."

Epros chuckled slightly. "Oh, but you finished it for me…"

Stan straightened out his collar and stood as his high and mighty self. "My bad." He knocked lightly on Ruka's door and both blondes waited patiently.

A small, sad voice was all that answered. "Y-Yes…?"

Epros' eyes widened lightly. "Oh, dear boy, are you all right?" He paused for a moment. "You sound… cheerless…" His own voice was suddenly burdened with worry.

Stan tapped the door. "Ruka… please open the door… It's both of us…"

Silence followed and a small click was finally heard. Ruka opened the door hesitantly and looked up at both of them, his normally happy eyes reddened and sad; tear streaks on his pale but beautiful face. "You… You're not going to argue…?"

Both shook their heads, but only Epros answered. "We've come to an alarming conclusion, you see… As much as he love you… he also cares for me…"

"And vice versa…" Stan added

Ruka's eyes widened slightly. "B-But… w-what does that m-mea-… Ah!" Stan and scooped the youth into his arms and over his shoulder. Epros smiled and shut the door as Stan gently laid the boy on his bed. "S-Stan!"

Stand smirked again. "Something was missing when Epros and I made this realization…" He said, and leaned down to kiss Ruka's lips again. "You…"

Epros made his way over and sat on the edge of the bed, taking Ruka's hand and stroking it gently with his thumb as he laid down with them both and smiled. "I feel the same, and now I must declare… With all of us here, there is much love in the air…" He gently nuzzled the boy's cheek.

Ruka blushed deeply at the complete feeling rising in his heart. He smiled timidly and hugged the two older figures gently. "Thank you…" He whispered, closing his eyes happily.

Stan quirked an eyebrow and smirked. "Who says we're finished with you yet…?"

Ruka blinked a bit and blushed. "Oh, have your way with me." He was being sarcastic of course, but Stan and Epros decided to take him up on that offer…

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END

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Me: All done. :smiles: If you wish to read the happy ending version, check my live journal… And by happy, I do mean yummy… X3--