Disclaimer: I don't own any of it.
Seth walked up the stairs two at a time. He walked into his room and saw Ryan sitting on his old bed, reading a comic that Seth had forgotten about. "Hey," Ryan started, closing the comic.
"Hey. Summer said you wanted to talk to me," Seth answered, sitting at the desk chair. "Is this a conversation we're actually going to finish?"
"I hope so," Ryan replied, sitting on his hands.
"So..." Seth drifted as an awkward silence filled the room.
"I couldn't marry Marissa because I'm in love with someone else," Ryan blurted, staring at Seth.
"Who?" Seth asked, wide eyed. Ryan didn't say anything for a minute, an hour, a day. He stared at Seth, knowing that this was the last time he would have a conversation with his brother. The last time Seth would be interested in whatever he had to say. Finally, he looked at the ground. "Who is it, man?" Seth asked, eager to find out. Seth loved secrets, Ryan knew this. He had a feeling this was one secret Seth didn't want to hear.
"Summer."
"What?" Seth asked, a bewildered look crossing his face.
"It's Summer, Seth. I'm in love with Summer." The stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity before Ryan saw a complete range of emotions in Seth's eyes. Shock. Betrayal. Anger. Devastation. Anger. It was the betrayal that bothered Ryan the most. It was the one emotion he hadn't been ready for. Seth stood and looked down at Ryan.
"How long?"
"A year," Ryan replied, looking at the floor.
"You never said anything?" Ryan closed his eyes and said nothing. "Does she know?"
"Yes," Ryan replied, his gaze faltering, but still not falling on his brother. He was looking at Seth's hands, which curled into fists at that word. He had taught Seth how to make a fist. He was fully aware of the fact that Seth could throw a punch.
"She's known this whole time?" Seth countered, pacing back and forth.
"No. Since yesterday. At the beach." Seth laughed.
"Does Marissa know?"
"No, I couldn't tell her," Ryan replied softly. He wasn't aware of the fact that he had been shaking until that moment. Seth thought back on the previous day. Summer had come home from the beach and told him how much she loved him, how much she needed him. And when they had fallen back on his bed, he remembered her whispering, "I love you, I love you." He hoped she hadn't come home from the beach and Ryan and felt the need to prove something to herself. He turned and opened the door. He walked to the top of the stairs.
"Summer!" he yelled. Summer appeared at the bottom of the stairs, looking up at him. "Come here," he added, and she said nothing, just climbed the stairs. She tried to grab his hand, but he jerked it away. She knew then. Ryan had told him. She walked into the room and saw Ryan sitting on the bed. She sat at the desk, her legs folded under her. Seth walked into the room and slammed the door with such force that Ryan jumped and Summer's eyes widened with fear. He looked at her.
"Tell me you love me," he pleaded.
"Seth," she said, as if he should've known.
"Say it."
"I love you," she said, her eyes begging him to believe her. He closed his eyes, and when he opened them, they were fixed on Ryan.
"Tell her you love her," he demanded, his eyes cold. Ryan shook his head and closed his eyes. He opened them and looked at her, her eyes now begging him not to say it.
"I love you," he said quietly, and as Seth's fist connected with Ryan's jaw, they all felt everything change.
Marissa sat on the bed in their apartment. Her apartment. His apartment. She wasn't really sure, they hadn't discussed it. She was looking at old pictures of them, trying to figure out when he had stopped loving her. She knew she shouldn't look at the pictures, but she didn't know what to do with herself. She was waiting for Summer, but her phone was shut off. She tried to call Seth, but he didn't answer. She was alone again. Looking at the pictures hurt, but they made her feel somewhat less alone. Like he was there with her, laughing at the faces they made in one photo, or telling her how pretty she looked in another. She thought of the things she would tell him. Like, what their kids would look like. Or what color she wanted to paint the living room. She could tell him that she liked his new haircut, or that she needed his help hanging a picture. She would probably tell him how pretty his eyes were. Most importantly, she'd tell him she loved him. She closed the photo album, thinking that it wouldn't have been enough.
Kirsten walked in the front door, surprised to see her husband crouched at the bottom of the stairs. She laughed.
"Are you eavesdropping?" she asked, setting her bags down.
"They're fighting," Sandy said quietly, motioning for Kirsten to join him. They heard Seth's door fly open, and they stood and quickly moved into the doorway of the kitchen. They saw Summer walk down the stairs, dragging a suitcase behind her. It was evident that she was hysterical.
"What's going on?" Kirsten asked, alarmed. They didn't even see Seth at the top of the stairs.
"We're staying at a hotel tonight. We're going home tomorrow," he answered, dragging the rest of their bags down the stairs. He walked by Summer, bringing the bags out to his rental car.
"I'm really sorry Kirsten, Sandy," Summer said quietly, tears streaming down her face. Kirsten embraced her.
"What's the matter? Where's Ryan?" she asked, looking at Seth, who had come back inside for Summer's bag. He grabbed the handle from her hand. Summer let go of Kirsten and looked at Seth, pleading for him. He looked away and turned to his parents.
"We'll meet up tomorrow to say goodbye," he said shortly.
"Seth," Sandy demanded, but he had already gone.
"I have to go. I'm sorry," Summer whispered. She had closed the door behind her before either Kirsten or Sandy could say anything. They looked at each other. Sandy walked up the stairs.
"Ryan?" he called, receiving no reply. Kirsten followed closely behind him. Sandy opened Seth's door to find Ryan sitting on the floor, a purple bruise stretching across his jaw. Kirsten hurried over and knelt beside him. When he looked at her, she noticed the tears clouding his eyes.
"Seth did this?" she asked, examining the injury.
"He made me tell her. I didn't want to say it in front of him," Ryan explained, making no sense to the others in the room.
"Slow down. What happened?" Sandy asked, taking a seat on the bed.
"I didn't marry Marissa. Then I told Summer that I love her. Then I told Seth and he told me to say it to her, and I did. I deserved this." Sandy and Kirsten looked at each other, unable to say anything. Kirsten took her son into her arms and held him, unsure of what was to come of this.
Summer sat on the bed of the hotel room, her knees hugged to her chest. Her hair was wet from her shower. She stared at the wall, begging someone or no one to fix this. She heard the bathroom door open and she knew Seth had gotten out of the shower, but her gaze didn't falter. Seth sat on the bed next to her and stared at her. She didn't look at him.
"Summer," he said quietly. She didn't reply. He had scared her, and she didn't like it. She understood, yes, but he didn't believe her. She didn't know everything, but she knew that. "Summer," he pleaded, his hand on hers. She pushed his hand away and looked at him.
"He's your brother," she whispered, meeting his eyes halfway.
"What did you want me to do?" he asked, sighing.
"Not that. I wanted you to talk to him. Not attack him."
"He said he's in love with you. He told you." Seth said, using everything he had to stay calm.
"You made him."
"I didn't make him do anything. He wanted to," Seth said, and Summer lowered her eyes.
"You scared me."
"I'm sorry," he said, and she knew he meant it.
"I love you, Seth. Not Ryan. You." He smiled. A small smile. She learned that you had to take what you could get.
"I know. I saw it when you looked at me," he replied, getting under the blankets. She kissed him before climbing in bed and turning off the light. "And I love you," he added, his lips buried in her shoulder.
Ryan stood at the door of the apartment, not knowing what to do . Finally he decided that the most logical choice was to knock. He knocked lightly and received no reply. He knocked harder the second time. She heard it. She opened the door and stared at him. "Marissa," he said, his eyes softening, his jaw hurting.
"Hi, come in," she said, secretly thinking she should've been cleaning instead of throwing herself a pity party. "Sorry, I haven't really been cleaning the past couple of days."
"Oh, it doesn't really matter," he added, turning to sit on the couch, and thats when she saw it.
"What happened to you?"
"Oh, Seth...it's okay, it really doesnt hurt," he lied, meeting her stare.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, he was just mad, it's fine," Ryan answered, wishing it wasn't a lie.
"Did you come here for clothes?" she asked, hoping the answer was no.
"Well, no. But I could take some before I leave," he replied. "I need to talk to you."
"Okay, do you want a drink or something, because..."
"No, I just need to tell you," he said, the words practically strangling him.
"Tell me what?" she asked softly, sitting down next to him. It hurt her to look at him, but she couldn't stop.
"It wasn't fair..."
"You've said that a million times, Ryan." He gave her a pleading look.
"It wasn't fair for me to marry you because I'm in love with someone else," he finished. Marissa stared at him, wishing that she could press rewind and not let him in the house, or that she could fast forward and have Ryan tell her he was kidding, that he wanted to be with her forever and he was sorry he had lied. She closed her eyes, waiting for him to kiss her and tell her it was going to be alright, and then she would tell him it wasn't nice to joke with her like that. He would smile and laugh and so would she and it would be better. Somewhere along the line, Marissa realized, she would have to stop pretending and face this. All of it. She opened her eyes, surprised to find them tearless.
"Who are you in love with, Ryan?" He bit his lip.
"Summer," he said quietly, and she suddenly wished she could go back to playing pretend.
"Summer. My best friend Summer?" she asked, not liking the chances that Ryan knew two people named Summer. Ryan. Her best friend. Summer.
"Yes."
"Oh...Oh my god," she said, covering her mouth with her hand, noticing that her body was waiting for a breath, but she hadn't taken one. She breathed, and had the sudden urge to scream. "That's why Seth hit you."
"Yeah, I told him yesterday. They left, it's all a mess."
"Does she love you?" Marissa asked, bracing herself.
"I thought that maybe she could, but now I don't think so," he answered, the words burning his mouth.
"I thought that maybe you were going to say you two were running away together," Marissa added, a sad laugh escaping her mouth. Ryan smiled despite himself.
"No. I didn't want to be in love with her, Marissa. You were the one I wanted to love. I can't help it, and I'm sorry."
"You can't control who you love, Ryan," she said wistfully. "How long?" Ryan remembered Seth asking him this.
"About a year. Summer's only known since yesterday. I couldn't lie to you, Rissa," he said, looking her in the eye. she had nothing left to ask, to say, so she stood up. She liked to think that she understood love, and fate. But she sure as hell didn't understand this. She knew for sure that Summer would never hurt her, and that Ryan always tried his best not to. She knew this wasn't intentional. She thought that maybe Seth felt bad for hurting Ryan, but that she wasn't completely sure of. She was certain that Summer felt badly about it all, but Marissa didn't know how she was going to face her after this. She was positive that she could, but right then, she didn't know how. Every bone in Marissa's body was jealous, hurt, angry.
"Ryan...," she drifted, looking at him. He looked up at her, waiting. "Thank you. For not pretending." He gave her a small smile and stood. "You should get some clothes," she finished, walking into the bedroom. He followed her, and when he arrived, she had already begun taking things out of the drawers. Thats when he saw the tears falling. He turned her around and embraced her, sorry for what he had done. She cried into his shoulder, not remember when the last time she had done it. It could've been last week, last month, last year. They broke apart minutes later, Marissa wiping off her face and Ryan putting his clothes into a bag.
"You should get some sleep," he said distractedly, noticing it was getting late.
"Ryan, I know this sounds silly, but can you lay with me until I fall asleep?" she asked, and he nodded. He wanted to turn around when she changed out of her clothes, but she laughed, "It's nothing you haven't seen before." He kept his gaze on the carpet, the one that had installed a month before. When he looked up again, she was under the blankets. He climbed into the bed, struck by how natural it should've been. Should've. He laid next to her, his arms wrapped carefully around her. He couldn't remember a time when she had ever felt so fragile, breakable. And it scared him. She turned off the light and when she was left in the dark, with him but still alone, the tears came again. He heard them but didn't know what to do. He stroked her hair, her back, and whispered how he was sorry, how it would be okay. When none of it helped, he returned to something borrowed from the past. Something he had returned before.
"A boy and a girl," he whispered, his face resting on her shoulder. She sniffled.
"What?" she asked, even though she knew exactly what he was doing.
"We'd have to move, because they wouldn't want to share a room. I think the boy would've been older, you know, to protect her." Marissa closed her eyes and listened. This was probably the most terrible thing they could be discussing, but somehow, it made her feel better. It made everything okay. And the last thing Marissa heard before she fell asleep was how their daughter would have had his eyes and her hair.
So, I'm not entirely happy with this, but here it is. I'll probably have the last part up tomorrow. Please review!