For the next few days, she fell in to a routine. Glorfindel would call by her rooms, and she would spend time with him father and his family…her family. Glorfindels mate, Celésang, welcomed her as though she were another daughter of her own, and his other daughter Isara and his sons Gardanial and Fiacha made her laugh. The first time she had laughed in many years. She was so content during these days, that she nearly forgot her gnawing desire to dance, and the pressure to let blood from her own veins eased. But always, there was a figure at the back of her mind. A whisper that haunted her every thought. One who had left the room upon Glorfindels confession, and had remained in the library, away from all during the last few days. And for some reason, she could not forget the look of such torment that had filled his eyes upon hearing Glorfindels words.
&(&
She went to the library that evening, to find him amongst the tomes. Neither reading, nor writing, simply staring in to space. He had neither eaten, nor slept for these days. And one thing was all he could think of. Celébrians face. He had watched her from afar for so long, until her mysterious disappearance threatened to render his heart from his very body. When he had heard she had chosen to live her life as mortal, his despair had been complete. And his heart had stopped beating. The appearance of her daughter, so alike her in many ways, had revived his frozen heart, but he no longer knew what to do. The door flew open, and then, the object of his thoughts entered the library, and sought him. He sighed, and struggled to speak. "Alimra, I wish not to be disturbed. Please leave."
She ignored him. "why are you here?. Why did you leave when Glorfindel began to speak of loving my mother?"
"You wouldn't understand." And with that, he got up and walked out of the room, leaving her staring after him, and he went to the glade where he had first seen her dance, and lit a low fire, and letting the flames cast shadows across his face, much like the shadows that flickered across his soul this night. She burst into the clearing, before she stalked angrily towards him. "Why do you not speak to me? I told you that which has so nearly ruined me. You said to trust you. And I have. But now, Erestor, it is your turn to trust me. Why are you so angry? Why do you ignore me now you know who my mother is." He looked away from her. And it suddenly occurred to her, as suddenly as it had to him all those years ago.
"You loved her too, didn't you?" she said quietly, afraid to look at him now, knowing what answer she would see within his eyes, her anger fading. He sighed.
"I thought I did. I thought that she might perhaps come to love me too. But she chose Glorfindel, and left. Taking my heart with her."
"You do not think that all this time has allowed it to start beating again?"
"I knew it to be the case until…"
"Until what?" she asked, pressing him.
"Until I saw you dance." He said quietly. She looked at the scars on her wrist. She had never broached this subject with any, finding it too painful to think or talk about, let alone dance. She looked back at him. "Then why still do you avoid me?"
"Because I have been hurt, and do not wish to be so again. I am unsure of my own heart, and I would not wish the pain I felt upon anyone."
She stood abruptly before him. "You are not the only one who was been hurt Erestor! When you saved me, I was near fading! I near killed myself so many times, I was sure that Mandos himself must know me. But I went on. You taught me, you, of all people, that I must go on. My torment I put aside, and moved on from, for those I love. Just like you taught me. Now will you do the same? What will it take for you to realise how necessary it is for you to listen to your own lessons Erestor? What will it take?"
He looked up at her, his tear worn face enough to make her heart leap, despite her annoyance at him. He swallowed nervously, before whispering huskily, softly,
"Dance for me? With me?" And then, despite her own terror, she never once hesitated. For her own hesitancy and fear at where her dancing would lead was shadowed by another's greater need. Erestor's. She looked into his eyes, her gaze never wavering, as she raised her arms slowly above her head, before spinning into his arms, and he flew her around the clearing in the flickering fire light, the shadows cast on his face making it seem haggard and tormented at first, until he too lost himself in the movement, and a look of pure rapture settled across his features, the rhythm settling in to his very bones . She swayed this way, away from him, then back, he pulled her body to his, swinging her high in the air, then back down again, pulling her to him, never letting her go. And when the song reached it's climax around them, both stopped moving, and stood staring at each other, before his lips came crashing down upon hers, and then both had what they wanted. The music wove a sensuous spell around them, unheard by all others but them, and their lips never leaving the others, and she realized then why she had feared the dance so much until now, why it had hurt and scared her. Because the dance was meant for two, and no one person could hope to carry it on their own.
A/N thank for the reviews. Lady Anck su Naman, I love the depth you go into. Yu let me know what's working. Thanks. And that song…it must have been written for the story !lol. it just all fit. Well, I'll tell you something, I'm getting all the chapter names from the lyrics of another song by Disturbed: Prayer; (but I changed one of the lines for the title.)
Another dream that will never come true
Just to complement your sorrow
Another life that I've taken from you
A gift to add to your pain and suffering
Another truth you can never believe
Has crippled you completely
All the cries you're beginning to hear
Trapped in your mind, and the sound is deafening
Let me enlighten you
This is the way I pray
Chorus
Living just isn't hard enough
Burn me alive inside
Living my life's not hard enough
Take everything away
Another nightmare about to come true
Will manifest tomorrow
Another love that I've taken from you
Lost in time, on the edge of suffering
Another taste of the evil I breed
Will level you completely
Bring to life everything that you fear
Live in the dark, and the world is threatening
Let me enlighten you
This is the way I pray
Chorus
Return to me
Return to me
Return to me
Turn to me
Leave me no one
Turn to me
Return to me
Return to me
Turn to me
Cast aside
Return to me
Return to me
Return to me
Turn to me
Leave me no one
Turn to me
Return to me
Return to me
So there's sort of a pattern there.lol. but I wasn't going to turn it into a song fic. Anyway. Keep letting me know what you think. Although, I think your song fits the story better. It had the same sort of feeling I wanted for the tone of my piece.ta.
Crecy; ta for your input. I always enjoy it when you stick your head up.lol. enjoy. And hurry up and update Everybody's Fool! I love that story! Lol.
Barabra Neal; Thanks. i use to be a cutter , so i know what she's going through. keep letting me know what you think.
Because you've all given me such great reviews, I have felt the need to update incredibly quickly (despite the fact that I have exams happening.lol. so enjoy.