Secrets - Chapter Seven

A gentle peacefulness seemed to envelop them. Kara was aware of feeling …safe.

Unbidden, a thought drifted into her mind. Maybe she could unburden some of her own secrets to him. She felt a quick stab of fear at the thought. She bit her lip, fighting down a sudden urge to confide in him, to say things she might later regret having said.

Lee seemed to sense her turmoil. He gazed at her appraisingly, then reached over and touched her leg. "Hey. Anything on your mind? I owe you some listening."

Kara leaned back on the wall again, folding her arms tightly across her chest. Maybe, just maybe… she could do this. For Lee. Because he asked.

"I don't hate kids," she finally said, seemingly out of nowhere.

She sensed his confusion, "That thing I said at Cloud Nine bar," she continued. "That I hated kids. I could tell it bothered you. I don't, for what it's worth."

Lee nodded. "Then why'd you say it?" he asked.

She drew her knees up to her chest, and wrapped her arms around them tightly. She could feel a trembling starting within her, and needed to physically hold herself together. When she finally spoke again, her voice was very low.

"Because my own childhood was pretty frakked up. My mother used to…hurt me." Kara unconsciously balled her hand into tight fists. "She told me that I … deserved it. I believed her."

Lee let out a small sound, of both outrage and sympathy. But she was afraid to look at him, for fear that her tenuous control would break completely if she saw the warm sympathy in his eyes.

"I never thought I would want kids, though. Me, as a mother…can you imagine? But…but," she swallowed. "It should have been my choice, damn it. And on Caprica…." She took a deep breath, fighting for control. "On Caprica, the Cylons did something to me."

"What? How?" Lee said, and she caught the pain in his voice.

"I was shot, and I woke up in a hospital of some kind. There was a doctor, and I didn't realize until later that he was a Cylon. And he … cut me open when I was sleeping and took…" She could barely get the words through her constricted throat. "He took something, I think…he took my ovaries, from what I overheard." She reached one hand up and rubbed her eyes furiously.

"Oh, Kara," Lee whispered. Now it was his turn to put his arms around her and enfold her, pulling her close. He leaned his head on her hair, making quiet, comforting sounds. Her head rested against the hollow of his throat.

In the midst of her emotional turmoil, she was amazed how comforting it was to let go like this, and let someone else be strong for her. She closed her eyes and let the tears fall for a few minutes, leaning against him, letting him rock her gently, while one hand cradled the nape of her neck.

Finally, she sniffed, and reached up to rub the back of her hand against her nose. But she didn't try to detach herself from his embrace. She loved the solid, comforting warmth of him.

Anyway, there was one more thing she needed to get off her chest. And not seeing his face made it easier.

"Also, I screwed up on Caprica," she started hesitantly. "I made a promise to someone. And I broke it."

"Who?"

"To a guy I met there. Sam Anders. Remember, I mentioned that the Caprica Buccaneers were part of the resistance movement? Anders wanted us to stay and help them.

"They were just a handful of people, really, fighting against ridiculous odds. But they were gutsy. And once they found out about the Cylon farms…" Her voice hardened. "…And how the Cylons were using human women in their sick experiments…well, they decided to take out as many of them as they could. But, instead of staying and helping them, Helo, Sharon, and I just…left." There was self-loathing in her voice now.

"And when we were about to desert them, to escape from Caprica, I looked Anders in the eye and gave him my word that I would come back to rescue him…all of them." Her voice grew tight again. "And I've barely tried. He...all of them, really…they deserved a hell of a lot better than that."

Lee was still holding her, but his body had stilled, and his cheek no longer rested on her hair. He cleared his throat. "Is Anders the one you gave your dogtag to?" There was the barest hint of an edge in his voice.

She didn't move from her position leaning against his chest, but her eyes narrowed slightly. "How did you know about that?"

"Kara, come on," Lee snorted. "I noticed you were missing a dogtag the first day I saw you again. I've noticed it a hundred times since."

"Why didn't you ask ?"

Lee edgy voice rose suddenly. "Ask? Ask! Are you forgetting what happened the last time I asked you to tell me about Caprica?" She could feel the muscles tensed in the arms he still held around her.

She bit back something angry, and instead squeezed her lips together, hoping he would let this drop.

Then Lee drew a breath, and when his voice spoke, it was quiet, controlled, and cold. "So…you slept with this guy, huh?"

She yanked away from him then, tossing his arms from her contemptuously. "Oh frak off!" she said furiously, stabbed by the similarity with the last time he had accused her of sleeping around. "It's none of your frakkin' business, but for your information, it wasn't just sleeping together. I fell in love with him!"

Lee eyes widened slightly, and he drew in a sharp breath. "You…you fell in love with him?" She caught a flash of something in his eyes. Pain? Regret?

"Yes!" She glared at him, breathing deeply. Then after a few moments, she let out an angry huff, and looked down. "No. I thought I did. Maybe he thought I did. But…everyone's emotions were pretty raw. It was…" She hesitated, then looked up at him, angry. "It was nice, for a change, being with someone who knew nothing about me. No history we had to get past. No judging going on." Her eyes blazed at him.

Lee was staring at her intently, his eyes slightly narrowed. Then he slumped a little and looked away. "I'm sorry," he mumbled.

They were still sitting on the rack, but now two feet separated them. She was angry, hurt, and emotionally drained by the last few hours. She lifted a weary hand to rub her forehead. "Okay," she finally said, proffering her forgiveness. Then she leaned back against the wall again.

Lee said nothing for a bit, and when he spoke again his voice was hesitant and quiet. "For me…with Shevon?…it was the opposite feeling. Making love to her was a relief because she knew the worst…the very worst thing about me—knew what I had done to Gianne and to our child. It was nice, for a change, not to feel like I had to hide that."

Kara swallowed and looked away, squeezing her eyes shut. She didn't want to hear this. The swirling emotional waters they had both been treading in suddenly felt like they were rising up to drown her. She couldn't take it anymore. If Lee said one more word about Shevon, or any other woman he had frakked, she would….

"When I was with her…" Lee began again.

"You know what, Lee?" Kara's voice ran over his, loud, sharp. She was on her feet now, her arms held up, as if defending herself. "I can't… do this anymore. I'm done. You've talked. I've listened." She was breathing hard, and a faint note of sarcasm crept into her voice. "I've done the friend thing here..."

"The 'friend thing?'" Lee spit out. "Well, thanks a lot. Sorry it was so painful for you."

"That's not what I meant!" She paused, trying to control her anger. "Look, Lee. You wanted me to listen. I listened. Maybe it was a good thing for both of us. But, I can't…" She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, exhaling sharply through her nose. "I'm not going to sit here and listen while you tell me what you were thinking while you frakked some woman a few days ago. I don't want to hear about how she made you feel, or what you talked about, or where you put your hands, or…"

"It isn't like that, Kara!" Lee was on his feet too. "And if you'll let me finish …." He reached for her arms, but she jerked away.

The voices of a group of chattering crewmembers drifted past the closed hatch door.

Lee clenched his fists and looked down. "Look," he said in a quiet, tense voice. "The shift is ending, and other people are going to be in here soon. Come with me to the CAG's office. It's private, and I want us to talk, just a little more."

Kara was shaking her head, her arms folded across her chest. She bit out the words. "I don't….want…to talk… anymore, Lee."

"Well then, don't talk, just listen!" His frustration flashed out again. "There are a few more things I need to tell you. And if I don't do it now, I may never do it. And I need to."

She was still glaring at him, but her eyes looked unsure.

He took a deep breath. "Kara, please? Meet me in the CAG's office in a few minutes. I'm asking you….Please?"

She stood stiffly. His eyes grew gentle, pleading. He reached for her arms again, let his hands linger, then brushed past her and walked out the hatch door.

Damn it! Kara thought, five minutes later. She was standing outside his office, shaking her head in annoyance at herself. She took a deep breath and swung open the door.

He was standing in front of his desk in the middle of the room, waiting for her.

She took only one step in the room, clanged the door shut behind her, put her hands on her hips and glared at him. "I'm here."

"Kara, listen. I'm sorry about Shevon," Lee said without preamble. "I have no excuse for it, except some weird sense that she was my responsibility. And I know I accused you not long ago of sleeping around, and I'm sorry about that too. I have no right to accuse you of anything.

"But that's not what I want to talk to you about. I want to talk about what happened between us, the day before I left for the Prometheus.

His voice was low, now, a little hoarse. "Ever since I landed on this ship a few months ago, I can't tell you how many times I've thought about doing…what we started doing that night. It was...wonderful. And you need to understand why I didn't let it continue."

He was breathing deeply, his hands clenched at his side. "It was because…I started feeling that I was betraying Gianne all over again."

She stared at him in confusion. "What?"

He swallowed. "I told you that I was in a strange place in my head that night when I was drunk. And I was feeling so guilty about Paya…oh frak, I mean, who I thought Paya was, anyway… and I was feeling horrible about how I had treated Gianne. And then I had this weird sense that Shevon and Gianne were the same and…."

The words were tumbling out of Lee now, as if he feared he'd lose his courage before he got them all out.

"And then I was holding you, and oh my gods, Kara, all I wanted to do was make love to you." He took a deep breath. "But when we got interrupted, all of a sudden I had this flashback, and I remembered Gianne crying when she left my house, crying because I couldn't love her the way I should, the way she needed me to…"

"And the reason I didn't…the reason I couldn't commit myself to her, was because…" He stopped short, his blue eyes fixed on her, and Kara was shaken to see the same look in them that she remembered from the night they had kissed. Filled with guilt, with grief. Desiring absolution.

He swallowed, and broke her gaze. "It was because of…you," he said, very low.

Kara swallowed. "Me?" she whispered.

He didn't meet her eyes, just stood stiffly five feet in front of her, but his face was twisted with anger. Anger at himself.

"You were with Zak, and it was crazy, but I couldn't stop thinking about you. I kept hoping that maybe you two would break up, and that you'd come to your senses, and you'd see that you were far more suited to me than to him."

He ran his hands through his hair, tense and agitated. "It's horrible. I mean, he's dead now, and I feel so guilty. I've hated myself for feeling that way."

He looked up at her again, his eyes haunted. "But I wanted you, Kara. I wanted to be with you. If I became a father, or married Gianne.… it would have made it so final. That I could never have you. And I just …wasn't…ready to let that go. So when she told me, I hesitated. And she saw it. And maybe she guessed why."

He was breathing hard now with his emotional confession. He slumped a little, and leaned on the desk behind him, looking down at the floor.

Kara's hand had flown to her mouth at some point during Lee's words. Her heart was pounding, her mind was whirling, but she knew what she had to do. He shouldn't have to step out on that emotional precipice alone.

'Lee," she whispered. Then she swallowed and said it a little louder. "Lee."

He looked up, his expression pained.

Kara paused, gathered her courage. "You weren't the only one."

"What?" he whispered, and leaned forward a little.

"I loved Zak, I did! He was funny, and warm, and he loved me so much. Loved me for me, not because I was 'Starbuck.' And I was happy with him."

Her breath was coming faster, and she knew she wouldn't be able to hold her tears at bay much longer.

"And then I met you. And I knew … I knew that …" her voice was shaking. She stopped, fought to control it.

"Knew what?" Lee whispered again.

"That I had met …the wrong brother first." And a sob broke from her. She turned away from him and leaned against the wall, struggling to keep herself from completely falling apart. She had a fist up to her mouth, and felt tears wash over it. "Zak," she whispered. "Zak, I'm so sorry."

After a minute, she took a deep breath and turned back to Lee. He hadn't moved, but his figure was still slumped against the desk, and his face was buried in his hands.

Then he looked up, and they gazed at one other. Tears streaked each of their faces, and the room seemed charged with emotion. Grief, guilt, but also….relief. On getting this out. On finally admitting it. On asking forgiveness.

Lee was looking at her intently. "Kara," he finally whispered, and he pulled away from the desk to begin moving towards her.

But something within Kara snapped. The flood of emotion suddenly submerged her. As she watched Lee move towards her, she became, quite suddenly, overwhelmed by panic.

She was afraid. Afraid of losing Lee. Her best friend. The Lee who teased her, and kicked her butt, and flew with her like he was her missing half. The Lee who sometimes made her laugh, and sometimes made her furious, but who made her, ultimately, a better person.

"Wait," she gasped out when he had taken only two steps toward her. "Stop, Lee!" She backed up a few feet until she hit the wall behind her, and held up her hands .

He stared at her, confused and hurt.

"I can't," Kara gasped out. "I can't do this with you. We can't be more than friends. It's just not going to work."

"Why?"

"Because…" She winced, struggling to put words around this sudden panic that had arisen in her. She grabbed at the most likely explanation. "Because I can't lose your friendship. What happens if we change things between us, and it ends? And it will end, Lee, because I am crappy at relationships. And when it does, our friendship will be over. And I can't lose you…I can't, because…." Her mouth twisted. This was difficult for her to say. "Because I need you too much."

His eyes softened. He didn't move any closer, but his voice was gentle. "Come on, Kara. Don't you think we've been through too much not to stay friends? I mean, think about it. We've screamed at each other, and stayed friends. We've said horrible things to each other, been furious, hated each other, and we've stayed friends. Hell, we've punched each other in the face, and stayed friends. And for that matter, we've already kissed each other, on two different occasions, and we're still friends.

"At times it seems we've tried our damnest to end our friendship, but we haven't been able to. Because we need each other. And I promise you, no matter what, we are always going to stay friends."

But Kara was still shaking her head, consumed by a more shadowy, less articulate, but far more frightening fear.

"No, Lee," she said again, fiercely, glaring at him in her intensity. "We can't do this! We can't change things between us."

A hurt bewilderment filled his eyes again, and he took an involuntary step backward. "Kara…" he said, and his voice was raw. "Why are you saying that?"

And now Kara totally lost it. Long-buried, shadowy fears found shape in a torrent of words, which flowed out of her in one long, incoherent jumble, accompanied by a flood of tears, and punctuated with fingers jabbed furiously in Lee's direction. "Because Zak died, Lee! He died because I loved him. And I felt so bad, and so guilty, because he wanted so much to be a Viper pilot. But he wasn't good at it. He wasn't as good as you, or me, or his father. And I couldn't tell him that! I couldn't tell him the truth, because I didn't love him enough to tell him the truth. Or maybe I loved him too much to tell him the truth. But whichever it was, he's dead. He's dead because he was stupid enough to love me! And now Anders—he's probably dead too, and why? I'll tell you. Because he was stupid enough to love me too! And because I didn't love him enough to keep a promise to go back for him. And that's the kind of shit that happens to men, when I… when I love them and …I just can't, I just can't love you…." She gave one last sob and buried her face in her hands.

A long silence followed her words. Finally Lee's confused voice broke into it. "You think something's going to happen to me, that I'm going to die,if we get into a relationship?"

"Yes!" She flung the word at him, and gulped down a few more shaky breaths.

"Kara?" he said, and now his voice sounded calm and infuriatingly grown-up. "Do you know how incredibly superstitious you sound?"

She wiped away a streak of tears clouding her vision, and glared at him.

"But, if that's what you're worried about, I think I can guarantee you that you're not going to kill me. I mean, you've saved my life a couple of times already. Kind of a wasted effort if you were going to kill me, don't you think?"

She was still glaring at him. She took another shuddering breath that suddenly turned into a strangled laugh. "Don't make me laugh about this, Lee. I'm serious!"

"I can see that," Lee said, nodding gravely, but his blue eyes flashed mischievously. "But actually, I think if anything, that you're in more danger than I am. I mean, I have seriously wanted to strangle you when you've started back-talking me at pilot briefings."

She couldn't control her gasps of laughter, now, and Lee's laughter joined hers as she leaned weakly against the wall, rubbing her eyes with her hands.

She was quite unexpectedly washed with a sense of exquisite relief. A buried, unconscious fear, never fully articulated before, had no sooner taken full shape before it had evaporated, blown away by Lee's practical common sense.

Their laughter quieted. Lee was still standing about four feet from her.

He waited until she raised her head and looked at him. Then he slowly and deliberately began to walk towards her. Her breath quickened as he kept his gaze locked onto hers. There wasn't a trace of laughter on his face now.

He stopped a foot away. They stared at one another for a few long moments, their chests rising a little quicker with their nearness.

"We could stay 'just' friends, Kara. It's true." His voice was husky. "But tell me something. If that's all we want, why is it, then…that we tend to do this …" He leaned in closer, then even closer, bringing his face to within just a few inches of hers, as he braced his arms on the wall on either side of her head. "…whenever we talk to each other?"

His breath was warm on her face. His eyes stared deeply into hers, then shifted to focus on her lips.

Her tongue darted out nervously to touch her top lip, which caused him to draw in a sharp breath. When he spoke, his voice was hoarse. "Why do we do this, Kara? What do you think?"

Kara could feel herself trembling. She didn't reply, just breathed in his scent. Warm, masculine, familiar, yet... heady.

"I don't know, Lee," she finally whispered, and then her lips curved ever so slightly upward. "Thinking is your skill, remember?" She pushed her hands back against the wall and leaned toward him, so that only an inch separated them. She flicked her eyes upward to look into his darkened ones. "That, and uh… talking."

His breath hissed out at her nearness. "And what's your skill, Lieutenant?" he asked huskily, a faintly teasing challenge in his voice..

Her eyes shifted to his parted lips, and she caught her own breath as she watched his ragged breathing, so close to her now. Then she leaned in the final inch.

"This," she breathed out, and touched her lips to his.

They started off tenderly, tentatively, their lips feather-soft, moving gently, playing with the light pressure.

Then Kara traced her tongue on his lip and he moaned softly against her mouth. His hands were still braced on the wall on either side of her head, and he leaned in on her until her back was pressed against the wall, then he leaned in some more, so that his body was completely pressed up against hers.

She moaned at the feel of his body, so close, so hard. That was his cue to release the wall and take her head between his hands. He reached up to pull the ponytail tie out of her hair, then his fingers played in the hair that fell down around her face, before lacing them through it on either side of her head to hold her still for a deeper kiss.

Without the solidity of the wall behind her and the warmer pressure of Lee's body holding her up, Kara' knees might have buckled by this point. She twined her arms around his waist to keep herself steady, and began using her palms to knead his back through his tanks.

He trailed warm kisses down the underside of her jaw and her throat, as she arched her neck and sighed out with pleasure. Then his lips moved back to her mouth, as his hands left her face to slide down her back, caressing gently until they stopped at her waist.

His fingers slid under her tanks and lightly caressed the bare skin, staying just at her waist. She breathed in sharply. "Oh, Lee " She could feel him smiling against her mouth as his fingers danced at her waist and the small of her back , simply tracing her skin with an erotically light touch.

She was breathing in short, fast gasps now, and suddenly was overwhelmed with the desire to feel his skin on hers. Her own fingers reached for his tanks, and lacking his patience for the slow burn he was teasing her with, she pulled them up and over his head in one sharp movement.

He had stepped back slightly and bent his head to allow her to pull them off, and as his arms came down again she sighed out her pleasure at finally being able to touch that body of his.

As he recaptured her lips, she trailed her hands from his neck, down his chest, toward his waist. Her fingers swirled patterns on his skin, and she smiled as he gasped slightly, moaning against her mouth.

His own fingers had inched up under her tanks again and were now skimming her rib cage, still using the same erotic, feather-light touch. She moaned again, deeply conscious of the heat of his body pressed against hers. She whispered, "Lee, take my shirt off."

"Be patient," Lee murmured, alternately kissing and nipping her jaw line. "I want to go slow. I've been waiting for this for a long time." And his fingers continued their maddeningly slow, erotic dance.

Kara growled against his mouth. "Oh, frak patience." She slipped out of his grasp, and yanked off her tanks, pants and underthings in about five seconds, before grinning cheekily at him and slipping back into his arms

Lee gasped, and his eyes widened. "Oh, Kara…" She smiled at his expression. His eyes seemed to caress her body, his hands following his gaze, gliding over her skin like she was a precious work of art. "Kara, you are so….beautiful."

"Thank you," she purred. "And you're overdressed." And she reached down and tugged off his pants, while he laughed at her impatience.

Then they reached for each other, and he wasn't laughing anymore. Their mouths met, and they kissed each other long and deep as their hands began a tender exploration of each another's bodies.

He still seemed intent on exquisite, drawn-out sex, though. But Kara wanted him. And she wanted him now.

She put her hands on his waist and pushed him away slightly, drawing a soft growl of frustration from him. She held him two inches away from her own body. "You know, Lee…." She leaned her face in and kissed him. "Sometimes…" She kissed him again, a little smile playing at her lips, and then her hands suddenly pulled him in, so that he was pressed up against the length of her.

She looked up into his eyes, now clouded with desire. "Sometimes I like it …hard and fast."

Lee groaned then in surrender, and pulled her down to the floor on top of him. Their hands were suddenly everywhere--exploring, caressing, stroking. They breathed each other in, tasted one another, delighted in making the other gasp out in pleasure.

The more they touched, and tasted, the more feverish they became. Their urgency was fueled by two years of long repressed desire, but perhaps even more so by the last few months of close contact. They had been stoking their passion with all the casual touching they had done in recent months. All the times they had held each other's gazes for too long. All the furtive glances and lingering hands. All the times they had leaned in too close. All the times they had wanted each other, but kept silent.

And now, the fire was devouring them.

And then… they were holding on to one another fiercely, moving swiftly, their cheeks pressed against each other as their rode their shared passion to its peak. They gasped out each other's names, then collapsed, their bodies intertwined

They lay panting, her body languid on top of his, as they tried to regain their breath.

And Kara marveled at the exquisite rightness of making love to Lee Adama.

She knew that she intimidated most men. In bed or out, she was too strong, too assertive, too much.

But Lee was her equal, on so many levels. And this...this had been bliss. She loved the way they had unconsciously taken turns leading their lovemaking. Initiating and receiving, giving and taking—they had switched back and forth instinctively, smoothly—the way they flew together. It was like flying together.

Frak that. It was a hell of a lot better than flying together. It had been hot and sweaty and raw and delicious and so incredibly satisfying.

She suddenly began to laugh. A loud, throaty, raucous, Starbuck laugh.

Lee lifted his head, bemused. "What is so funny?" he demanded with a mock exasperated tone, one hand resting on her back, the other working its way through her hair caressingly. She rested her chin on his chest, and looked up at him.

"It's just…." She shook her head in admiration. "Damn, that was good." She raised her eyebrows, her mouth in a wide, satisfied grin.

"Well, what did you expect?" Lee said solemnly. "I am 'Apollo,' after all." But this was accompanied by an incongruously sweet, self-deprecating smile.

Kara gave a hoot of laughter as she rolled to the floor by his side, and rested her head on his shoulder. "Well, Apollo," she said, and glanced down at their intertwined bodies, sprawled on the floor. "You couldn't even make it to the couch, huh?"

He growled a laughing response, "If I recall, Starbuck, you contributed a bit to that."

She threw him a cheeky grin, then laid her head back on his shoulder and sighed in contentment.

They finally did make their way to the couch, and fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms. At one point she awoke, and his enticing nearness made her unable to resist reaching out her fingers to caress his chest and arms again.

She smiled to herself, realizing that she had wanted to do this ever since Lee had gotten stranded on the Galactica. She still remembered the first day she had seen him in the communal shower, in all his naked glory. Her jaw had dropped at the sight of his sculpted physique. And in complete violation of battleship etiquette, she had stared—frankly and unabashedly—for five seconds, as he twisted and turned under the streams of hot water. Who would have guessed his uniform hid that?

She hadn't stopped staring until he caught her eye, and, suddenly embarrassed, she had reluctantly torn her gaze away. But he hadn't seemed to mind. Out of the corner of her eye, she had caught a smirk crossing his face, and then his eyes had enjoyed their own frankly appreciative look at her body. Then they had each studiously kept their gazes fixed on the water swirling out of the drains beneath them.

But now….now, she could play, and she let her hands caress his chest and arms. She had always loved strength, power, well-developed muscles. And Lee had them in spades.

Her enjoyment of his body grew so intense that she woke him. She was amused to see his eyes move from groggy to aroused in about three seconds.

"I was wondering," she said with smile, her hands splayed out on his chest caressingly. "If maybe the first time was a fluke?"

"Hmm, could have been," Lee said huskily, nodding his head seriously. "I guess there's only one way to find out."

He suddenly and smoothly rolled over on top of her. He gazed into her eyes, then bent his head to whisper into her ear. "And this time, we're doing it slow." He smiled at her sudden intake of breath, then let his mouth take possession of her.

The second time was even better than the first.

Hours later, they were awakened to the soft claxon of the morning watch sounding in the ship.

Lee stirred, stretched, then squinted at his watch. "We're going to have to get up," he said reluctantly.

She groaned and snuggled closer to his side. "Nah…let's just call in sick."

He chuckled, then reached over to move a strand of hair out of her face, looking at her thoughtfully.

"So…." Kara said. "Some evening, huh?" She smiled up at him.

"Yeah," he said gently, playing with her hair. "No regrets?"

She gave an inelegant snort in response, then reached out to tap a finger against his skull. "Thinking too much, again, Lee."

He smiled, then grew serious, holding her eyes.

He cleared his throat. "Kara… this guy on Caprica—Anders?"

Kara's eyes narrowed and her body tensed. "What about him?" she asked suspiciously.

"You promised him you'd go back and rescue him….him and all of the members of his resistance group, right?"

"Yeah," Kara said slowly.

Lee sighed. "Then you should."

"What?"

"Kara, if you let this go, if you break your promise, it's going to end up eating away at you. Take it from me." He gave her a wry smile.

She stared at him, suddenly gripped by an overwhelming sense of panic. Her eyes widened slightly, and her breath unconsciously quickened.

Lee was gazing at her intensely, thoughtfully.

"You don't want to go anywhere near those Farms, again. Is that it?" he asked gently.

She pressed her lips together to hold in her emotion, then gave a brief nod.

Lee's eyes grew gentle. "What about if I went on the rescue party with you?"

Kara's lips parted. "You would?"

"Of course I would."

She let out a long breath. "Then, yeah," she said slowly. "I think you're right. I—we—need to do this."

"Okay, then." Lee gave a businesslike nod. "We'll both start working on twisting my father's arm to approve it."

She gazed into his eyes for a long time, her face completely serious.

"What?" Lee asked, with a crooked, self-conscious smile.

"I love you, Lee Adama," Kara said.

He caught his breath. "I love you too, Kara Thrace."

The moment lingered. A pledge. A promise.

Sounds drifted past the hatch, breaking the spell. Lee stirred, then leaned in close to her.

"But, Kara?" He kissed her full on the mouth, then pulled away to look at her appraisingly, as a teasing light sprang into his eyes.

"Don't even think," he said in a low voice. "That I'm going to sit back and watch you and Mr. Pyramid Has-Been get something going again."

Kara laughed and leaned over to nip his chin. Then she moved her lips near his ear and whispered teasingly, "Maybe we could use him for a little two on one action….Ow!" She laughed in protest as he rolled on top of her and pinned her under him, his hands pulling her wrists out and immobilizing them.

"No way," he growled. "Because I…" he tasted her mouth, then pulled back. "…don't like to share." He let her hands go, and she reached up and ran her fingers through his short hair.

"No danger," she laughed. "'Cause I just found something out."

"Oh yeah? What?" he raised his eyebrows.

"How good you are in bed, flyboy. Gotta love a man who's that good with his hands."

He laughed and she reached up to pull his head down to kiss her.

Twenty minutes later, they were tossing tanks and pants to each other, scrambling to get dressed. They both tried to smooth down their tousled hair as they approached the hatch door. As she reached to open it, Lee stopped her. "Wait."

She turned her head to ask why but suddenly felt his hands gather the fabric of her tanks in order to pull her in and give her one last, long kiss. Then he released her and threw her an enticing smile.

"So, same time tonight?" he asked.

She stepped back, and lowered her lashes a little, smiling seductively. Her tongue touched her top lip as she considered. "Maybe…" she said finally. "But only if we get to do more of that… talking." She winked.

And left the room to his soft laughter.

She strode jauntily down the corridor, humming a little under her breath. Her body was loose, more relaxed than she could remember being in a very long time. She felt sexy, strong, and happy. A secret little smile played at her lips as she remembered the ways he had kissed her, the ways he had loved her.

Oh, yeah, she thought, as she turned the corner toward the officers' quarters.

This could be a very good thing.

-fin-

I hope you liked how I brought this long fic to a conclusion. Please review! It would mean a lot to me! Thanks!