Discaimer: I don't own Slayers. I'm just here for fun.

Chapter Eleven

Zelgadis was in his dressing room on the morning of his wedding to Lina. He had already eaten his breakfast – alone – at a tiny table in his bed chamber, and was now dressing. Needless to say, he was a little surprised when a frantic little knock rapped on the door. For a moment he thought that it must be Lina and wasn't sure whether or not he ought to call for the knocker to enter. In the end he went and opened the door a crack, and was rewarded by an extremely unusual visitor. It was his mother. She was really the last person he wanted to see that morning, which was why he had breakfasted alone in his room instead of joining his mother and brother.

"What is it?" he asked her, and opened the door wide for her to pass.

"General Metalium has just shown up on our doorstep," she proclaimed frantically. "He says you said he could stay here if he was attending the wedding."

Zelgadis stood back and gaped.

General Metalium was a man slight of stature and large in the knowledge of his own importance. He had been Zelgadis' commanding officer since almost the beginning of Zel's military career. This is not to say that Zelgadis liked him – he didn't. The general had this ungodly habit of leaving critical information out of their strategy sessions. For instance, Zel's company would engage the enemy, defeat them, and afterwards find out that they had been pitted against an army twice their size or just the opposite would happen. They would be told that they were going to face a large force and they would slaughter the battalion, only to discover that there were not near as many soldiers as they were expecting. Sometimes they would be ambushed, and when Zelgadis reported it, the General simply nodded. Zel would clench his teeth and repress the urge to strike his superior officer. The man had known all along what would happen. Zelgadis was not the only officer who detested General Metalium's way of doing things, but the higher ups loved him because he got results, and the enlisted men worshiped him because his battles were victorious.

But what was the ass doing now? He knew that an invitation had been sent, but he didn't think for one second that the General would actually come. There was one other thing that was bothering Zel. He had not told the general that he was welcome to stay with them.

"Why did you tell him he could stay here?" his mother asked sharply. "With all the cousins staying here really isn't room for him."

"I didn't invite him," Zelgadis said in his defense. "He's down stairs right now? I'll go tell him he's mistaken and that he'll have to go to the inn."

"You can't. It's too late. Rezo already said that he could stay."

"What?" Zelgadis exclaimed.

"He ground his teeth in that terrible way of his and told him we would be pleased to host him. Where are we going to put him? Rezo told me when we were alone that you would have to think up a place."

"Well, he can stay in my room," Zel said after a moment's thought. "I won't be sleeping here tonight anyway and Lina's room will probably need some work done in it after she leaves. See if there's a servant to come clear out my things that haven't already been packed."

"Miss Amelia has already arranged for all that," his mother said hastily.

"Well, then I suppose there's no real reason to be concerned then," Zel said, turning back to the mirror.

He thought he had dismissed her, but his mother didn't leave the room. She just stood there rubbing her hands together in an anxious manner.

"What is it? You seem nervous. Is it really so traumatizing for you to be marrying off one of your sons. Besides, I thought you wanted me to be married."

"It's not that," she said quickly, and Zelgadis experienced a moment of disappointment. He had thought for a moment that she really cared for him – ridiculous. "I do want you to get married. I just don't want your general here."

"Why is that?" Zel asked, now feeling very cold hearted towards her.

"I believe there is a little bit of a history of bad feelings between him and the Ut Copts."

Zelgadis laughed. It had to be something like that.

"It's not funny Zelgadis! I don't think he gets along well with Lord Valgaav at all. It would be a pity if they were to quarrel and ruin your wedding, or if Lady Filia was displeased with us because he was a guest in our home."

"You worry about what the Ut Copt's think far too much," he said seriously, but not turning his head from his tying his cravat. "I'm not exactly pleased to have him here myself, but it would have been extraordinarily rude not to invite him to the wedding and even ruder still to refuse him accommodations. Not that this sort of thing is supposed to matter, but he could make things difficult for me if we are not extremely polite to him. So, even though having him here is a dreadful inconvenience, if you ever want me to become a general myself, then I recommend that we deal with the situation with poise."

Apparently, his mother had not thought of it in this shameless way before, and when Zelgadis showed the situation to her in this self-serving light – she couldn't agree with him more. Zel thought miserably at how good he had become of reading her mind and figuring out exactly what would please her. Well, it hadn't been just him – Lina had helped him figure out exactly how her mind worked.

After she left the room, in a considerably better mood than the one she had come in with, Zel was free to think about his bride-to-be. Nothing had changed between him and Lina over the past few days. He had hoped that she would be able to tell him where she was planning on going after the wedding, but she hadn't told him anything. When he finally asked her about it point blank the night before, she had skillfully changed the subject. It was then that he decided that she hadn't made up her mind yet. What could he do to make her decide to come with him? He racked his brain all that night, but hadn't been able to figure out what would touch her heart. Maybe today would be the last time he would be able to see her.

He felt sick.

He needed a plan. At last he decided there was nothing for him to do, but confess that he had fallen in love with her. But when would be the right moment? And what would he say? She seemed to dislike sentimentality, so an ardent confession of his feelings would probably have no affect whatever on her. It might even work to drive her away. After some considerable thought, he decided on what he would say. The when was easy – at the first possible moment.

After much preparation, Zelgadis stood beside the alter waiting for Lina to walk down the aisle towards him. Rezo stood beside him with an expression on his face that seemed to speak nothing but murder. Zel tried hard to ignore him, and felt rather wretched that his brother had to be his groomsman. Lina hadn't liked it either, but they had decided between the two of them that there was nothing else to be done. Luna was Lina's maid of honour and she declared that she needed no bridesmaids.

Finally, Lina stood in the doorway of the chapel. The sun shown behind her and illuminated her like she was an angel. Rezo gasped. Zel kicked him in the shin without turning to look at him. Then he looked around the chapel to make sure no one saw. It didn't look like anyone noticed and Rezo made no sound – everyone was watching Lina, and she looked lovely. The dress Eris made for her was one-of-a-kind and beautiful beyond Zel's ability to describe it. He wanted to call it a curious mix of sky and sea, because he knew no other way to explain. He silently thanked Eris for her hard work. Since they were trying to please his mother's socialite friends, he knew the dress would be acceptable to even the harshest critic.

The ceremony itself was long, or at least it felt long to Zelgadis who was waiting for his moment to tell her how he felt. It might have been only a few minutes, but it dragged on forever to Zel.

At last the priest gave him his permission to kiss Lina. Zel turned to her and lifted her veil. He bent and kissed her. When the kiss was over he pulled her close to him and embraced her taking the opportunity to whisper into her ear, "I want you to come to India with me." He believed this was the perfect thing to say to her. It implied his true feelings for her without being overly sentimental. She had always seemed so disdainful towards great shows of feeling anyway. Then he pulled away from her. Her eyes looked dark and Zelgadis couldn't read what she was thinking.

There wasn't time to ask her though and he began leading her back down the aisle with a healthy smile on his face, exactly the expression he imagined Lina was wearing now for their guests. He wanted to be as controlled as she was even though his heart was beating so hard and his feelings were racing through him so quickly.

He helped her into the carriage that was waiting to take them to the banquet hall. Zelgadis waved to their guests and got into the carriage himself. He and Lina waved again and were driven away from the church. He was dying to know how she had taken his confession.

Zelgadis looked across at Lina, but she was staring out the window with her chin tilted decidedly up.

"What is it?" he asked her, suddenly noticing that there was something seriously wrong with her. She seemed completely out of sorts.

"It's nothing Zelgadis," she said coolly and continued to gaze out the window. Her jaw was clenched tight.

"It's not 'nothing' – did I say something wrong?"

"Oh, I don't know," she said. Then suddenly she turned to him and blazed, "Wasn't I supposed to get something out of this deal? If I was I completely forget what it was. If it was just to have treasure-hunting men leave me alone than I don't know if it was worth it."

Zel was completely thrown back by her words, but being an army man it didn't take long for him to get control over himself. "Are you regretting marrying me already?" he asked incredibly dryly.

"You said that right in the middle of everything. I really didn't like being put on the spot like that. How was I supposed to answer you there?"

"You can answer me now," he insisted.

Lina shook her hair. "I had no idea you wanted me to go to India with you. You could have told me sooner. I don't know why I said that I wanted to go to India. I wouldn't want to go with the military. I'm against our occupation in India and going with the military as part of their company would be so . . . repugnant to my feelings."

Zel didn't realize it, but soon he was saying, "I didn't realize you objected to me because I was a military officer. I thought we were friends and you would take pleasure in the trip. I would have enjoyed having you with me."

"'Friends'! You think of me as your 'friend'?" she exclaimed.

"Of course," he said, acting indifferent as he organized his cuff and jacket sleeve.

"Well, I'm glad you understand that I won't be going to India with you. You can drop me off in the woods after the ball tonight and then return to your duty," she said stiffly.

Zel wanted to ask her why she was suddenly behaving the way she was. Why was she speaking so coldly him? Had he phrased his question to her badly? Had he asked her so badly that he couldn't make it right? He would have to try again.

"Lina," he said, trying not to act like he was discussing a personnel issue with one of his lieutenants, and fearing that he wasn't accomplishing his goal. He had never had cause to discuss his feelings in this open way before. He thought she wouldn't appreciate an open display of feeling, but perhaps he was wrong. "I apologize that I said that in front of everyone. I had no idea that it would make you uncomfortable. What I wanted to say was that . . . I've fallen in love with you." He stopped there, not wanted to proceed unless it was welcomed.

Her eyes were the size of moons as she stared at him. "You don't love me Zelgadis," she said at last, as though it was very painful.

"I do," he said, not breaking eye contact with her.

"No, you don't," she said looking away from him. "If you loved me, you would not ask me to go to India with you. You told me once that you could not risk breaking the heart of the woman you loved by being wounded or killed on the field of battle. If you loved me, you would not go off to fight anyone, and if we were truly of one mind," she continued. "Then you would be against the army as well, but that's only a minor concern. Instead, you want me to go with you. If we had a relationship like you are proposing, would I just be a tag along? I'm not the woman you love if you would leave me to go away to fight. I think we should stay apart until you find the woman you are really in love with."

Zel felt as though his heart were being ripped from his chest. He couldn't believe that she remembered that he said that. He couldn't say anything at first.

"Don't you have anything to say?" Lina asked.

"I don't know what to say," he said breathlessly. "If I were to leave the military I would be penniless with no occupation to fall back on. I have not been trained in anything. You must understand that when I joined the army I had about as much hope of finding a lover as fly to the moon. I hadn't much money to begin with, but my compensation from my career has paid for everything I promised to pay for in this arrangement. If I were to leave, I would be forced to rely on you for financial support, which is the LAST thing I wanted out of all of this. I never wanted to touch your money. So, in order to keep myself independent from your wealth I must continue. I must also point out very quickly that I will probably not be required to fight during this trip to India."

"It doesn't matter if you'll be required to fight or not. The fact that you're not willing to leave proves that you don't truly care for me. And as far as I'm concerned, the money isn't important at all. Since you're not concerned about your respectability, then why not run away with me and live with the gypsies? It costs nothing to live with them."

Zel just looked at her, and didn't know what to do at all.