If you hate Star Wars, you may want to skip thischapter . . .
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May 18, 2005
"Do you have them?" Susan Lewis nudged, as Abby rooted through her bag outside the theater, "Don't tell me you lost them, 'cuz we are not missing this show . . ."
"Got 'em!" Abby announced triumphantly, holding up a pair of tickets she'd stowed in her purse a week ago. A lot can change in a week . . .
Abby remembered Jake telling her about the contest. Apparently, County had saved the life of some Cineplex big-wig's daughter, and he showed his gratitude by donating 20 tickets for the preview screening of 'Star Wars: Episode III' to the hospital. Somehow, Jerry had acquired the job of distributing said tickets. He devised an online quiz to determine who was worthy:
"Name the bounty hunter who was shot by Han Solo in the bar at Mos Eisley," Jake read from the computer screen, with Abby looking over his shoulder, "Oh, come on, who knows this stuff?"
"Greedo," Abby supplied, then went on to another question, "Heh – 'Who is the most annoying computer generated character of all time?'"
"That's not even a real question," Jake complained, "It's subjective."
Abby reached around him and typed, "Jar Jar Binks."
It had been sweet of Jake to try to cultivate an interest, but his efforts accentuated their generation gap. Although Abby didn't consider herself to be a hardcore fan, she'd grown up on C3PO and R2D2, and Jake didn't quite get the nostalgia factor. Nevertheless, after Abby had won them a pair of tickets, he'd been reasonably enthusiastic about going with her to the show.
That was before they'd had "the talk." The talk that Abby had been hoping to avoid, but knew she couldn't. The talk that resulted in them, now, not speaking to each other.
On the one hand, Abby felt like she did the only morally acceptable thing she could do: she told Jake not to make any life-altering decisions, such as where to go for his residency, on the basis of their relationship. Jake had been just what she needed after the angst and drama of her time with Carter, but she had never tried fool herself, or Jake, that there was more to it than that, and she wasn't going to let him screw up his professional future on account of her. On the other hand, she could see why he felt hurt. Nobody likes to have it shoved in their face that they are more emotionally invested than their partner is.
All of this worked out well for Susan, who eagerly claimed the extra ticket and walked ahead of Abby as they entered the crowded theater. The seats and tickets were numbered for the event. It was easy to find the contingent from County, sitting in parts of two adjacent rows; Jerry's bright orange "Let's make WOOKIE" T-shirt would be hard to miss.
Abby recognized most of the County group, which included doctors, nurses, and staff members from various departments. She and Susan took their places next to Sam and her son Alex, in the row in front of Jerry. Upon sitting, Abby noticed Dr. Dubenko on the other side of Jerry – from the aisle he had been obscured by the desk clerk's bulk. Dubenko and Jerry were deeply immersed in some kind of debate. Abby overheard the word "mitichlorines" and decided to steer clear of that conversation.
After chatting with Sam for a few minutes, Susan announced, "OK, time for some munchies." She and Jerry made their way toward the aisle.
"A real friend would bring back Sno-Caps," Abby called after them.
Dubenko caught Abby's eye and smiled at her, then he abruptly turned his attention to the complimentary movie pamphlet.
Abby conceded that, much to her surprise, it had not been especially hard working with Dubenko since their trauma-room conversation. He didn't ignore her, or avoid her, or act any weirder than usual. He didn't seem embarrassed; rather, unless his mind was elsewhere, he generally seemed happy to see her. For better or for worse, he went on trying to mentor her, as before. The only difference was now he made a point of not singling her out. Practically speaking, that meant Neela got dragged along on the impromptu science lessons and assertiveness training.
Abby grinned, recalling Neela's sarcastic 'Oh, thank you so much for sharing' jibes. But actually, the arrangement wasn't so bad: Neela was enough of a science geek that she knew what Dubenko was getting at some of the time, and, in Abby's opinion, the younger intern could benefit from a little encouragement to stick up for herself.
Now they weren't at work, however, and Dubenko seemed unsure how to proceed. Abby broke the ice, "I thought you said you liked foreign films."
Dubenko replied, "I do like foreign films." At Abby's raised eyebrows and playful smile, he caught on and grinned, "Even I know better than to ask a girl if she likes science fiction."
Abby laughed. They were saved from further small talk by Alex's morbid musings about just how much of Darth Vader's body could be missing under that mask and armor. This launched Dubenko into a vivid description of hemicorporectomy procedures, with Alex eagerly prompting for gory details:
"So they cut offthe guy's. . . you know . . ?"
"Oh yeah. Hmmm, if that happened to Anakin, it would have to be after he fathered Luke and Lea . . ."
"What happens when he has to go to the bathroom?"
As Dubenko and Alex discussed this subject with relish, Sam rolled her eyes, looking over at Abby, who shrugged, contemplating which of the two participants in the conversation was creepier. Dubenko was way more cheerful and enthusiastic than one ought to be when talking about chopping off half of someone's body. But he brought that kind of kooky glee to most subjects and she was getting used to it. In contrast, from what Abby knew of Alex, he was bored unless something gross or violent was involved. Of course, he was just a kid. Maybe he would grow out of it. Or maybe he would grow up to be a trauma surgeon. He already kind of had the hair . . .
Susan and Jerry returned and shared their bounty. Apropos of nothing, Susan asked Abby, "So, who were you in love with, Luke Skywalker or Han Solo?" At Sam's blank stare, she explained, "All the girls in my fifth grade class had crushes on either Luke or Han."
Abby snarked, "Bo Duke."
"Ewww!" Susan swatted Abby with her program.
"Well, I guess I'd have to go with Han," Abby said, "My little brother thought he was Luke Skywalker, so that would've been kind of incestuous. He had the Jedi underwear and everything."
"I had the pillowcase, so I could go to sleep with Luke every night," Susan sighed comically. Abby and Sam giggled, and Dubenko, who was listening in on the exchange, laughed quietly.
Susan turned on the surgeon and asked, grinning, "What about you? I bet you had the underwear."
Abby wondered ifSusanwas deliberately trying to embarassDubenko, afterhis participation in the tenure fiasco, but she couldn'tdetect any malice in her friend's light-hearted tone. Dubenkoseemed both startled and amused by Susan's query. He stammered, "I, uh, I was in high school in 1978."
"I didn't hear a 'no,'" Susan teased, "Did that sound like a 'no' to you guys?"
Dubenko grinned, "Um, that would be a 'no' on the underwear." Then, somewhat sheepishly, he admitted, "I did, however, build scale replicas of the Death Star and the Millennium Falcon."
Jerry put in, "Oh, yeah. I remember those kits. With the little decals for the gun turrets, and that awesome glue . . ."
Dubenko shook his head, "Mmm, the kits weren't precise enough. You know, a few millimeters deviance, multiplied by the ratio . . . well, it adds up. So, I made them from scratch." He held his hands about two feet apart, saying, "My Death Star was this big across."
"You don't still have them, do you?" Jerry asked, "I know this guy on e-bay who would pay mucho dinero."
"Uh uh. I kept the Falcon for a while, but then gave it to someone. And the Death Star . . . Well, I knew that my, uh, housemates were going to destroy it anyway, so I decided it should go out with a bang."
"You blew it up?" said Alex, glancing sideways at his mom and trying not to sound too excited.
"Yep," Dubenko nodded, with a little lopsided smile. Jerry looked impressed. Abby wondered what it was about the males of the species that made them almost universally revere explosions.
"How?" Alex prompted.
Sam started shooting Dubenko meaningful glares. 'Yeah, good luck with that,' Abby smirked to herself.
Oblivious, Dubenko explained, "Blowing it up, that was the easy part. Just took apart a few – well, quite a few – firecrackers and stuffed them inside. But remember how flames spread across the surface right before the explosions? That was trickier. You need an accelerant, of course, but it can't be too unstable or the whole thing will go up . . ."
Dubenko went on a bit about chemical reactions and combustibility. Alex, a hint of impatience in his vioce, tried to draw him back to practical matters by saying, "So, what did you use?"
Dubenko opened his mouth to reply, when Sam, who had been trying desperately to catch the surgeon's attention, gave up on non-verbal cues and cut in harshly with, "Do you really think it's a good idea to give my thirteen-year-old son instructions for how to make explosives?"
Abby could barely contain her mirth as Dubenko cocked his head and stared off to the side, obviously pondering the issue. 'He doesn't quite get the concept of a rhetorical question, does he?'
Dubenko glanced at Sam, but looked away quickly, perhaps fleeing the protective anger in her demeanor. When he made eye contact with Abby, she pursed her lips to keep from laughing and shook her head from side to side almost imperceptibly. Taking the hint, he answered Sam weakly, "Oh, ah, maybe . . . not."
Alex scowled at his mother, "I'm just going to find it online, you know."
Sam sniped back, "That's why God made parental controls."
Mother and son were still bickering when the theater lights dimmed.
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Author's note: OK, this chapter is pure summer fluff. Hope you liked it anyway. The Abby/Jake stuff is speculation; it isn't based on spoilers. Not that we care much about Jake anyway . . . heh.