Chapter 20: Admiral Piett
The shuttlecraft landed in the huge bay on Executor and the ramp lowered. Darth Vader and Obi-Wan were already there, waiting and they were both startled to see Mara Jade come running out, screaming. The beautiful, fearless assassin leaped onto the startled Jedi and knocked him to the floor.
"You have to DO something!" Mara wailed as she scrambled to her feet, glancing back at her shuttle nervously. "It's terrible!"
"What's terrible?" Obi-Wan asked, confused.
"Now what is going on?" Vader stared at the shuttle. Lately it had been one thing after another! When were things going to go back to being normal?
As if in reply, Prince Xizor appeared at the mouth of the shuttle, swaying slightly. He clutched one hand to his stomach, the other weakly holding onto the metal doorway. Spittle clung from his bottom lip and his skin was an especially pale green. He stumbled down the ramp and almost fell, then managed to catch his balance. The next moment his face twisted in pain, he bent over and hurled the contents of his stomach all over the landing bay.
"That's what's going on!" Mara shrieked as she leaped backward before any of the vomit could hit her. 'He tore apart my entire bathroom, then he started puking and just wouldn't stop!"
Vader smoldered at the sight of vomit all over his landing bay. How dare he do such a thing on Executor! "He is addicted to pills."
Mara watched as Xizor stumbled to a clean area of the landing bay and dirtied that spot. Stormtroopers were pointing at him, talking into comlinks. Soon they would catch and restrain the Falleen; hopefully they'd shoot him. She straightened her back, embarrassed by her momentary moment of panic. She had a quarry to hunt down. "Well, he's your problem, Vader. I have other things to do."
"Not so fast, Jade!" Vader's hand snapped out and caught her by the wrist. "You will not harm my son. I cannot allow that."
"Well, you shouldn't be letting him make prank calls to my private number!" Mara glared at the Sith Lord's black mask. "I'm not scared of you, Lord Vader. You can't intimidate me like you do everyone else. And I report only to Palpatine himself. If I'm not mistaken, he's aboard your ship this very minute. He might be interested to know you're apparently associating with a Rebel and a Jedi."
"The Emperor already knows of their presence." Vader replied calmly. "And Luke was not making a prank call. He has an infatuation."
"What?!" Mara shrieked in shock.
"Yes, he loves you!" Obi-wan added as he picked himself up off the floor where Mara had knocked him. "It's all he's been talking about."
"That's ridiculous!" Mara scoffed. "He doesn't even know me! So I picked him up one time to go see Palpatine. Geez, that doesn't mean he loves me!"
"But he's convinced he does." Obi-Wan told her.
"And you will not harm him because of it." Vader warned her, menace in his voice. "If you try, I promise you will not live very long."
"The guy is a total idiot!" Mara complained, horror on her face. "He couldn't even stand on his own two feet when I meet him! And you better control your wayward son, Vader, or else!"
Mara turned to leave the shuttle bay, snatching her hand free of Vader's grasp.
"Where are you going?" Vader demanded.
"To see Palpatine." Mara replied as she walked out, a smile on her face. And if she just happened to run across Skywalker on the way, well, that was just too bad!
The Sith Lord watched her leave, then turned around to see what Xizor was doing. But he was gone and the stormtroopers were lying in a big heap on the floor. Incompetent fools!
A gray uniformed officer approached Vader. "Lord Vader, there is a call for you."
"Very well." Vader wet to the com unit on the nearby wall and pressed it. "Yes? This is Lord Vader."
"My Lord! Someone has vandalized your private quarters!" Admiral Piett's voice informed him. "And the person has stolen one of your sets of clothing and is masquerading as you. What do you want me to do?"
Drat! Vader scowled under his mask. It was clear Luke had escaped from the closet. "It is my son. Have him caught but under no circumstances is he to be harmed! And be on the lookout for Prince Xizor. He is also to be caught. And while you are at it, see if you can find Mara Jade. And a beautiful woman with black hair, she should have a Jedi robe with her. Oh, and find that drat smuggler, Solo! Last he was seen crawling into an air duct."
"My Lord? Is that all?" A very startled Piett asked, trying to remember it all.
"No, there should also be several Jedi loose on the ship."
"Jedi, My Lord?"
"Yes, Jedi!" Vader fumed.
"Will that be all, My Lord?" Piett asked hopefully.
"No. Go check personally if my Mother is still in Sickbay. If not, find out where she went! And Master Yoda was there, too."
"Y…Your Mother, My Lord?" Piett stuttered.
"YES! My Mother!" Vader replied.
"Very well, My Lord." Admiral Piett paused for a moment, then continued. "What shall be done about the hole in your quarters, My Lord?"
"What hole?" Vader asked, bewildered. He had known that Piett said his quarters had been vandalized, but a hole? He had presumed Luke had just thrown things around a bit, perhaps forced the closet door open.
"There is a big hole in the wall, My Lord. It was cut with a lightsaber, or so said the … your son?"
"I will be there momentarily. Go find those individuals I mentioned." Vader sighed. The Executor was so big and people were getting lost on it. Who knew what other stupid things his son might do? Cutting a hole in the wall? What had the boy been thinking of? Then Vader remembered something else. "Piett, also go find my daughter while your at it. She's on board somewhere, too."
"Yes, My Lord!" Piett replied.
...
Admiral Piett scrambled to remember whom he was all supposed to find for Lord Vader. It was an extremely crazy list. His mother, a daughter, a son, a woman with a robe, Jedi, someone crawling in the air ducts…. oh yes, Prince Xizor. Had there been anyone else? Piett thought for a moment and was sure there had been others but he couldn't remember whom. Well, he would just grab anyone that wasn't dressed like an Imperial and drag him or her over to Lord Vader. Surely finding these people couldn't be too hard. The Admiral left his quarters, shaking his head in disgust. Why in the world would someone be crawling around in the air ducts?
At least this assignment got him off the bridge and he could stretch his legs a bit, get to see other parts of Executor. He would head to Sickbay first and see if Lord Vader's mother and the Jedi Master were still there. But weren't the Jedi supposed to be extinct? Nether less, it was his duty to question Lord Vader's commands but to carry them out. He just rounded a corner when he spotted a civilian wearing grease-stained robes. "You! Halt!"
Master Mace Windu stopped and turned around to look at Piett. "Yes? What may I do for you?"
"I have orders to bring you to Lord Vader." Admiral Piett explained to the dark-skinned man.
"I don't have time to waste. I'm on Official Jedi business!" Mace told him as he glanced up at the ceilings and walls. "I'm tracking a dastardly scoundrel that attacked me and a fellow Jedi. He's crawling around in the vents somewhere…"
"I have orders to catch that one, too." Piett admitted as he looked at the Jedi hopefully. "Do you know where he is?"
"No, I don't. I don't even know where I am!" Mace glanced up and down the long white corridor. "Everything around here looks the same! It's just one hallway after another after another! I became separated from Qui-Gon about an hour ago and I can't find him, either. We were looking for a men's room but couldn't find one. We did find an unlocked supply closet though…"
Admiral Piett gulped, turning pale. He had to find all these missing people before every supply closet and perhaps even turbolifts were … damaged.
Loud footsteps echoed down the hallway and they both turned to see who it was.
"Hello!" Called Prince Xizor as he came staggering down the hallway, his face still a pale green. "Do you have any pills?"
"Pills?" Asked Mace, concerned. The Jedi ran forward and gripped Xizor's arm, helping to hold him up. It was obvious the poor man was sick. "We must get him to Sickbay! This man needs medical attention."
Xizor leaned heavily on Mace as he eyed the things on the Jedi's belt, especially the shiny little capsules. They called to him, saying TAKE ME! TAKE ME! TAKE ME! And so he did what they said. Reaching down like a bolt of lightning, the Falleen unhooked Mace's belt and dashed down the hallway with it.
"HEY! My belt!" Mace started to run after the green thief, but after a few steps his white pants slid down around his ankles and he tripped, falling flat on his face.
Prince Xizor skidded around a corner and disappeared from sight.
"Well, don't just stand there, man! Help me catch him!" Mace yelled at Admiral Piett, who was standing there dumbfounded. In all his life in the military, Piett had never seen such outrageous behavior! Where had this scum come from? Seeing that Piett wasn't going to help him, Mace dashed down the hallway, one hand holding up his pants.
...
Han Solo grumbled for the thousandth time as he crawled through yet another vent. He had no idea where he was going or how to get out of this maze of endless vents. He was hot, dirty and thirsty. His only consolation was that Vader hadn't neutered him. Yet. This darn ship was too big!
A dim light was ahead and the smuggler hurried towards it. Elation filled his body when he saw the metal grating. Yes! He had finally found a way out! Eagerly he knocked the metal grate to the floor and poked his head out, looking up and down the hallway to see if the cost was clear. He cocked his head sideways, listening carefully. He couldn't be too careful. This was an Imperial ship and old helmet head was pretty sore at the moment about the pink stuff. He heard some faint footsteps, but they didn't sound like a stormtrooper. Still, he pulled his head back in like a turtle and waited. Within moments a woman appeared. She stopped, staring at the metal grate on the floor and then glanced up.
"Hey!" Han poked his head out, grinning at her. "You're Luke's grandmother, aren't you? We met, remember?"
"What are you doing up there?" Shmi asked. "Are you fixing something?"
"Er, I'm all done up here." Han eased more of his body out and then dropped to the floor, managing to land on his feet. He brushed at his once white shirt, now a dark gray from dust. A dark cloud filled the air and they both coughed. "Remind me never to go up there again."
"Do you know where we are?" Shmi asked hopefully. "I've been wondering around what seems forever and can't seem to find anyone."
Han glanced at a symbol on the wall. "Landing bay is that way, three decks down. The turbolift should be just ahead, first turn on the right-hand branching corridor."
Her eyes grew big. "How do you know that?"
Han swung his arm. "Ah, they make all these ships the same."
They started walking down the hallway in the direction Han had indicated.
"Hey, how would you like to help me bake some cakes?" the smuggler asked.
...
Luke finally found a nice quite room on the Executor where he could finally take off this annoying disguise. Except for a single crewmember watching a control panel, the room was empty. A sign on the door marked it as the AUXILIARY CONTROL ROOM. Still in his father's set of armor, Luke stepped forward. "You! Leave at once!"
The startled crewmember stared open-mouthed at Luke. "Darth Vader!"
"Yes, it is I." Luke said boldly, hoping he sounded halfway like his famous father. Still, his voice lacked the sound and power of Vader's, but the man didn't seem to notice. He only had eyes for the black breath mask.
"Yes, Lord Vader!" The man hurried out of the room and stood uncertainly in the hallway. "What shall I do?"
Luke's stomach rumbled loudly. It had been hours since he had eaten last. "Go fetch me a gallon of blue milk, five bantha burgers, a side order of fries and a barbequed rib of sand sloth."
"Y..Yes, My Lord!" The surprised crewmember hurried down the hall to get the desired food, wondering how he was going to carry all of that back to the Auxiliary Control Room.
Once the man was gone, Luke went inside and locked the door. Removing the heavy costume, he was relieved that he could finally breath freely again. Glancing around, he quickly realized he could control the entire ship from this one room. Bending forward, he carefully examined the control panel until he found the switch he wanted. Reaching out, he flipped the one marked SHIPWIDE INTERCOM and cleared his throat. Mara was sure to be on board somewhere by now and he was going to serenade her.
To be continued…