Normal All Over Again
Disclaimer: As much as I wish these characters were mine, unfortunately they do not belong to me, but in fact the almighty Joss Whedon
Chapter Two:
Buffy sat in her nondescript and 'un-homely' room. She had become oblivious to time. She was not aware of how long she had been in the institution that she was now meant to call her home nor could she even say what day of the week it was. All she knew was that the doctor came in the morning with 'medicine'- which she had now realised to be some form of tranquiliser, and then a nurse came in the afternoon. Somewhere in between her parents would visit her, but even this, which had brought her so much joy and comfort in the beginning , now served as little more than another way to fill in the empty monotonous gaps of time.
Essentially she was alone. She had no friends. Not like her Sunnydale friends or her enemies. Even though she had now accepted the fact that they were not real, it did not mean she didn't or wouldn't miss them.
Buffy's thoughts were abruptly interrupted when the door of her room swung open and a man in a white coat walked in. Buffy, slightly taken aback by this entrance, walked from the window she had been staring out of and sat cross legged on her bed. The doctor smiled at Buffy before glancing down at his clipboard.
"Good Morning Miss Summers, how are we feeling today?" The Doctor enquired before looking up from his clipboard
"Where's the other Doctor." Buffy demanded
"He was transferred to Sunnyhell." The Doctor looked up from his clipboard and explained himself when he saw the look of confusion and horror on her face. "Sunnyhill. It's another institution in the local area. It has a bit of a bad rep among a lot of the doctors, hence Sunnyhell." Buffy still looked extremely wounded from the use of the word "Sunnyhell" and the Doctor clearly seeing that continued: "I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you at all."
Buffy pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them and mumbled "No, it's fine, I just… It doesn't matter."
The Doctor evidently eager to move on started up again. "My name is Doctor Sanguine by the way. So tell me, how are you today?" As the doctor asked this his pen was poised and at the ready.
"Everything feels a little muddled. Its…Its hard…everything is so hard. I thought that if I came here that it would be easier, but…" Buffy trailed off, not particularly wishing to continue, but still utterly aware that the Doctor's focus remained on her. The room was filled with an awkward silence and Doctor Sanguine clearly wished that it would end because he spoke, at last.
"Buffy, it will get easier, I assure you. It wont always be like this. You just have to be strong and carry on."
"That's what they always used to tell me. 'Just be strong' or 'I know you are strong'. That's what Giles always used to say. That I was strong…" Tears began down Buffy's cheeks, but she just brushed them away feeling a little embarrassed and self-conscious.
"Physically strong…right? I mean you were…" He looked down at his clipboard unmistakably searching for a word. "…the slayer?"
"Emotionally… they said I was emotionally strong." Buffy was clearly slightly insulted by this and continued. "It wasn't like I was just some 2D character in a comic. My life… my delusions, were as real to me as your life is to you. Every sense, every feeling, every moment was so vivid, the fact that it wasn't real wasn't even conceivable."
"Buffy, I understand what you are going through." He saw Buffy look at him with a look incredulity on her face and he went to continue, but she interrupted him. "How could you possibly? My entire life and existence have been undermined. I've been told that everything that I ever thought or thought I knew is wrong."
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you Buffy. Look, I just came in here to see how you are going and to check up on you, but clearly you aren't in the mood so I'll come back tomorrow. Well it will be me or one of my interns." Another awkward silence filled the room. "Ahh… Till next time then Buffy." He began to head for the door, but then made one last comment "By the way, I ask that all my patients call me Will… it just seems to roll off the tongue better that's a…"
Buffy had started to mumble into her knees as though she was reeling in shock. "Spike? Everything fits … but its not real? I haven't made any connections in so long? Why now? Its not real. Remember its not real…" Buffy had not realised but the Doctor had made his way over to her side.
"Buffy…" He put his hand out to touch her shoulder as a comfort, but she recoiled instantaneously. His hands and voice were so much like his.
"Spike?" Buffy looked up at the man only to realise that it was not Spike, it was still the doctor. At that moment, for inexplicable reasons, the Doctor felt great compassion and caring for this girl and he knew that he had to help her. If for no other reason except to rid the desperation and pain he had seen in her eyes.
"You aren't to worry, love, I'll take care of things." Buffy nodded at this, but could not bring herself to look up. For, although this man did not look exactly like Spike, he seemed like him in almost every other way possible. The Doctor took a few small steps backwards towards the door as though he did not wish to take his eyes off her before turning around and making his way out of the room.
After the Doctor's visit she felt as though some of the fog that had been accumulating on her brain had lifted. Her thoughts felt a vast deal clearer and not quite as obstructed as it had even just a few hours earlier even with her visit from the Spike look-a-like, which she thought was a little peculiar.