" ER/Stand - part 7"
It was the bright sunlight streaming across her pillow that woke her up. Kerry sat up and looked around. Part of her was more than a little surprised and disturbed to find herself in a room she didn't recognize. Jeanie was curled up in a chair, fast asleep. Slowly the situation came back to her. The flu was killing everyone. It had become clear that it couldn't be controlled in any way. She checked her watch. It was six a.m on Sunday. The last day she remembered clearly was Wednesday. This is not good, she thought as she noticed the bandage on her forehead. She slowly got out of bed, taking care to disconnect the IV from her arm. Someone had thoughtfully placed a forearm crutch near the bed, but a glance at it told her that it wasn't hers. It wasn't sized quite right and she took a moment to adjust it, taking care to not wake Jeanie. They weren't at Jeanie's house, she knew that, but she also knew that Jeanie was a woman with good sense. Wherever they were, she trusted Jeanie's judgement that it was a safe place.
There were a couple of suitcases and bags dumped in the corner. She recognized some of the bags as her own, and in fact were filled with her own clothes and personal items. So Jeanie had stopped at my house, she thought as she dressed, and her own. She winced suddenly. Why do I hurt so much, she wondered as she limped towards the door, I feel like I walked away from a car wreck. And I'm starving. She could vaguely recall Lucy Knight plying her with cookies and juice, but her body told her that the cookies had been some time ago.
One glance at the dim hallway told her exactly where she was. She'd been in the Carter mansion a few times before for some fund raising events. She flicked the hallway light, but wasn't surprised when the lights didn't come on. The power had been failing and she'd known, even days earlier, that they were soon to be without electric power. It was nice while it lasted, she thought sadly as she walked down the hallway.
The kitchen was near the family living room, she remembered that much about the giant house. She stepped into the large living room and looked around. Lying on the floor near one of the leather couches was Doug Ross. There was an empty bottle of scotch next to him and the scent of alcohol hung around him like a cloud. Wonderful, she thought as she took in the scene. Most of the human race has died, I feel like there's a jackhammer going off in my skull, and the only man left alive is a drunken Doug Ross. This must be hell.
She shook off those thoughts as she spotted the kitchen door. Hunger overrode her annoyance. She left Doug where he was lying and went into the kitchen. Much to her surprise, the room was filled with the gentle hum of electricity. The refrigerator was cold and the freezer was filled with ice crystals. That's nice, she thought as she saw fresh orange juice just waiting to be poured. I want more than juice though.
The stove was a gas stove and there were plenty of breakfast fixings. She doubted Doug would want to eat, but Jeanie would probably like some food. And Carter. Somehow she doubted Jeanie and Doug would have gone to Carter's family home as a place of refuge without Carter suggesting it. How much should I make, she thought. A lot. Whether or not anyone else was hungry didn't matter. She was starving.
The kitchen soon started to smell with the warm scent of cooking food. She knew she was suffering from some sort of shock, and cooking had always made her feel better and more in control. She made several stacks of blueberry pancakes and started to fry up some sausage links. Then she moved over to the coffee pot. There was an assortment of foreign coffee, which made her smile sadly. It was going to be a long time before anyone imported more Kenyan coffee, she mused. She started a pot percolating.
" What's cooking? It smells great!" Kerry almost dropped the spatula, she was that startled by the sound of Randi Fronzac's voice. It was almost frightening. Randi, for her part, seemed equally surprised to see her. " Dr. Weaver, you're up... Are you ok?"
" Randi..." Kerry took a deep breath. " I'm sorry. You startled me. I made breakfast." Randi was alive and that thought startled her almost as much as Randi's words had.
Randi looked at her with something between concern and humor on her face. " Breakfast smells great. Are you like... aware of whats going on? You've been a little weird acting lately." Her tone spoke volumes. Kerry felt a strange wave of fear roll through her. Randi was more concerned than "a little weird acting" implied. It didn't help that no matter how hard she thought about it, she was drawing a blank on the last three days.
Finally she said, " I don't remember the last three days at all, and the days before that aren't crystal clear." It was embarrassing to admit. The last thing she remembered clearly, and sequentially was letting the staff leave and telling Doug Ross to take Carol home. It hadn't been that she felt that badly for Doug, but she did like Carol. As soon as she had seen Carol coughing and sneezing, she knew how it would end. Judging by Doug's condition, she'd been right. It didn't make her feel better in the slightest. She hesitated, but then asked, " What exactly happened that was weird?"
Randi shrugged. " You said it was ok for me to use your first name. That was for starters."
" Ok..." That wasn't too horrible, especially considering that she had always rather liked Randi. Somehow though, she suspected that was just the beginning. " Considering the situation, you should use my first name. We're not exactly coworkers anymore."
" Yeah, I think that was your original point." Randi sniffed the air. " Is the food done? Because I'm starving and all we had to eat last night were some skanky sandwiches that Lucy made."
Kerry pointed to the oven. " There's blueberry pancakes in the oven. The sausage is on the stove and I think the muffins should be done by now." She didn't know what else to say. That Lucy was also alive was wonderful, but she couldn't help but think that Randi was about to tell her something humiliating. It didn't help that she was so hungry, it was difficult to concentrate.
Randi returned with two heaping plates of food. She set them down on the kitchen table and sat down. After a second, Kerry joined her. Randi was clearly more interested in food than in relating the events of the past few days. She dove into the pancakes with gusto, stopping only to slop real maple syrup onto them. Kerry gave up for the moment, and started to eat her own pancakes. It felt good to do something normal like eat, and she felt better. At least the gnawing empty feeling had gone away, though it did make her more aware of the fact that she felt physically rotten. She watched as Randi swirled her sausages in the syrup and felt her impatience grow. " So what else happened?"
Randi made a point of swallowing her mouthful of muffin. " Well.... You started refusing to sleep or eat.... Then well.... Do you remember that guy Walker?"
" Yes, " she said after a moment. A pompous, abusive man that gotten his jollies off on the power he had in the crisis. He'd ordered the shooting of civilians and people she had known had been killed. She knew that, felt that, but the details what had happened escaped her. What she did know, almost instinctively, was that she had despised the man almost from the instant she met him. She shuddered suddenly. " He was sick... I remember that."
Randi nodded. She seemed to hesitate. " He smacked you up Wednesday night, hard enough to bruise. Then, yesterday..." She stopped for a moment, clearly struggling to find the right words. " That was when the not eating and not sleeping thing started getting out of hand. I don't know exactly what happened yesterday because I wasn't watching your every move. I was a little upset myself... what with most of the human race dropping dead and all." Her tone was a little piqued, as if she'd already been read the riot act over it. She toyed with her remaining sausage. " Walker beat the crap out of you. I don't know when. None of us saw you from about three in the morning until nine. I found you in exam room four. You were pretty out of it."
" How out of it?" Her nerves started to ring.
Randi looked suddenly grim. " I didn't see it. You heard something and went out in the hallway. Walker was nuts. He thought there was some vaccine. He threatened everyone... You had... you had a gun that you'd found somewhere and you shot him."
Kerry felt herself grow cold. " I shot him... Did I kill him?"
" Oh yeah." Randi leaned back in her chair. She shuddered. " You pretty much turned his head and back into swiss cheese. For what it's worth, the son of a bitch deserved it. He shot Lucy. He would have killed Lucy, Jeanie and Carter if you hadn't done something." She eyed Kerry carefully. " Let me get you a cup of coffee. You need it."
" Ok..." Kerry said dully. She struggled to recall the events of the day before, but nothing came to her, absolutely nothing. She'd killed a man. She had done it intentionally, to the point that Randi seemed startled by what had happened. Her hands started to shake. She wrapped her hands around the coffee mug that Randi handed her gratefully and sipped the hot drink.
" You ok?" Randi asked after a moment. She was worried, that much was obvious, Kerry realized. The concern made her feel a little better but she couldn't quite shake the empty sick feeling that engulfed her.
She stood up slowly. " I'm all right. " She stepped over to the door that led to the large covered porch, coffee mug in hand. " I just... I just want to be alone for a little while. Maybe get a little fresh air and think." Before Randi could answer, she walked out onto the porch. I don't want to think, she realized as she sat down in one of the wicker porch chairs. I just want to remember.
??
It was the bright sunlight streaming across her pillow that woke her up. Kerry sat up and looked around. Part of her was more than a little surprised and disturbed to find herself in a room she didn't recognize. Jeanie was curled up in a chair, fast asleep. Slowly the situation came back to her. The flu was killing everyone. It had become clear that it couldn't be controlled in any way. She checked her watch. It was six a.m on Sunday. The last day she remembered clearly was Wednesday. This is not good, she thought as she noticed the bandage on her forehead. She slowly got out of bed, taking care to disconnect the IV from her arm. Someone had thoughtfully placed a forearm crutch near the bed, but a glance at it told her that it wasn't hers. It wasn't sized quite right and she took a moment to adjust it, taking care to not wake Jeanie. They weren't at Jeanie's house, she knew that, but she also knew that Jeanie was a woman with good sense. Wherever they were, she trusted Jeanie's judgement that it was a safe place.
There were a couple of suitcases and bags dumped in the corner. She recognized some of the bags as her own, and in fact were filled with her own clothes and personal items. So Jeanie had stopped at my house, she thought as she dressed, and her own. She winced suddenly. Why do I hurt so much, she wondered as she limped towards the door, I feel like I walked away from a car wreck. And I'm starving. She could vaguely recall Lucy Knight plying her with cookies and juice, but her body told her that the cookies had been some time ago.
One glance at the dim hallway told her exactly where she was. She'd been in the Carter mansion a few times before for some fund raising events. She flicked the hallway light, but wasn't surprised when the lights didn't come on. The power had been failing and she'd known, even days earlier, that they were soon to be without electric power. It was nice while it lasted, she thought sadly as she walked down the hallway.
The kitchen was near the family living room, she remembered that much about the giant house. She stepped into the large living room and looked around. Lying on the floor near one of the leather couches was Doug Ross. There was an empty bottle of scotch next to him and the scent of alcohol hung around him like a cloud. Wonderful, she thought as she took in the scene. Most of the human race has died, I feel like there's a jackhammer going off in my skull, and the only man left alive is a drunken Doug Ross. This must be hell.
She shook off those thoughts as she spotted the kitchen door. Hunger overrode her annoyance. She left Doug where he was lying and went into the kitchen. Much to her surprise, the room was filled with the gentle hum of electricity. The refrigerator was cold and the freezer was filled with ice crystals. That's nice, she thought as she saw fresh orange juice just waiting to be poured. I want more than juice though.
The stove was a gas stove and there were plenty of breakfast fixings. She doubted Doug would want to eat, but Jeanie would probably like some food. And Carter. Somehow she doubted Jeanie and Doug would have gone to Carter's family home as a place of refuge without Carter suggesting it. How much should I make, she thought. A lot. Whether or not anyone else was hungry didn't matter. She was starving.
The kitchen soon started to smell with the warm scent of cooking food. She knew she was suffering from some sort of shock, and cooking had always made her feel better and more in control. She made several stacks of blueberry pancakes and started to fry up some sausage links. Then she moved over to the coffee pot. There was an assortment of foreign coffee, which made her smile sadly. It was going to be a long time before anyone imported more Kenyan coffee, she mused. She started a pot percolating.
" What's cooking? It smells great!" Kerry almost dropped the spatula, she was that startled by the sound of Randi Fronzac's voice. It was almost frightening. Randi, for her part, seemed equally surprised to see her. " Dr. Weaver, you're up... Are you ok?"
" Randi..." Kerry took a deep breath. " I'm sorry. You startled me. I made breakfast." Randi was alive and that thought startled her almost as much as Randi's words had.
Randi looked at her with something between concern and humor on her face. " Breakfast smells great. Are you like... aware of whats going on? You've been a little weird acting lately." Her tone spoke volumes. Kerry felt a strange wave of fear roll through her. Randi was more concerned than "a little weird acting" implied. It didn't help that no matter how hard she thought about it, she was drawing a blank on the last three days.
Finally she said, " I don't remember the last three days at all, and the days before that aren't crystal clear." It was embarrassing to admit. The last thing she remembered clearly, and sequentially was letting the staff leave and telling Doug Ross to take Carol home. It hadn't been that she felt that badly for Doug, but she did like Carol. As soon as she had seen Carol coughing and sneezing, she knew how it would end. Judging by Doug's condition, she'd been right. It didn't make her feel better in the slightest. She hesitated, but then asked, " What exactly happened that was weird?"
Randi shrugged. " You said it was ok for me to use your first name. That was for starters."
" Ok..." That wasn't too horrible, especially considering that she had always rather liked Randi. Somehow though, she suspected that was just the beginning. " Considering the situation, you should use my first name. We're not exactly coworkers anymore."
" Yeah, I think that was your original point." Randi sniffed the air. " Is the food done? Because I'm starving and all we had to eat last night were some skanky sandwiches that Lucy made."
Kerry pointed to the oven. " There's blueberry pancakes in the oven. The sausage is on the stove and I think the muffins should be done by now." She didn't know what else to say. That Lucy was also alive was wonderful, but she couldn't help but think that Randi was about to tell her something humiliating. It didn't help that she was so hungry, it was difficult to concentrate.
Randi returned with two heaping plates of food. She set them down on the kitchen table and sat down. After a second, Kerry joined her. Randi was clearly more interested in food than in relating the events of the past few days. She dove into the pancakes with gusto, stopping only to slop real maple syrup onto them. Kerry gave up for the moment, and started to eat her own pancakes. It felt good to do something normal like eat, and she felt better. At least the gnawing empty feeling had gone away, though it did make her more aware of the fact that she felt physically rotten. She watched as Randi swirled her sausages in the syrup and felt her impatience grow. " So what else happened?"
Randi made a point of swallowing her mouthful of muffin. " Well.... You started refusing to sleep or eat.... Then well.... Do you remember that guy Walker?"
" Yes, " she said after a moment. A pompous, abusive man that gotten his jollies off on the power he had in the crisis. He'd ordered the shooting of civilians and people she had known had been killed. She knew that, felt that, but the details what had happened escaped her. What she did know, almost instinctively, was that she had despised the man almost from the instant she met him. She shuddered suddenly. " He was sick... I remember that."
Randi nodded. She seemed to hesitate. " He smacked you up Wednesday night, hard enough to bruise. Then, yesterday..." She stopped for a moment, clearly struggling to find the right words. " That was when the not eating and not sleeping thing started getting out of hand. I don't know exactly what happened yesterday because I wasn't watching your every move. I was a little upset myself... what with most of the human race dropping dead and all." Her tone was a little piqued, as if she'd already been read the riot act over it. She toyed with her remaining sausage. " Walker beat the crap out of you. I don't know when. None of us saw you from about three in the morning until nine. I found you in exam room four. You were pretty out of it."
" How out of it?" Her nerves started to ring.
Randi looked suddenly grim. " I didn't see it. You heard something and went out in the hallway. Walker was nuts. He thought there was some vaccine. He threatened everyone... You had... you had a gun that you'd found somewhere and you shot him."
Kerry felt herself grow cold. " I shot him... Did I kill him?"
" Oh yeah." Randi leaned back in her chair. She shuddered. " You pretty much turned his head and back into swiss cheese. For what it's worth, the son of a bitch deserved it. He shot Lucy. He would have killed Lucy, Jeanie and Carter if you hadn't done something." She eyed Kerry carefully. " Let me get you a cup of coffee. You need it."
" Ok..." Kerry said dully. She struggled to recall the events of the day before, but nothing came to her, absolutely nothing. She'd killed a man. She had done it intentionally, to the point that Randi seemed startled by what had happened. Her hands started to shake. She wrapped her hands around the coffee mug that Randi handed her gratefully and sipped the hot drink.
" You ok?" Randi asked after a moment. She was worried, that much was obvious, Kerry realized. The concern made her feel a little better but she couldn't quite shake the empty sick feeling that engulfed her.
She stood up slowly. " I'm all right. " She stepped over to the door that led to the large covered porch, coffee mug in hand. " I just... I just want to be alone for a little while. Maybe get a little fresh air and think." Before Randi could answer, she walked out onto the porch. I don't want to think, she realized as she sat down in one of the wicker porch chairs. I just want to remember.
??