Disclaimer: If they actually belonged to me, this wouldn't be fanfiction, now would it?
Warning: All dialogue. Slash. SBRL. Get used to it, I'm a faithful shipper.
Can I Ask You Something?
Part the Second
"Morning, Remmie!"
"What do you want, Lily?"
"I just said 'Good morning' and you think I want something?"
"You called me 'Remmie.'"
"So?"
"You always call me 'Remmie' when you want something. Only when you want something. It's a tell."
"It's a what?"
"A tell. Something that gives you away. It's a poker term."
"Poker?"
"It's a card game."
"I know it's a card game. I'm Muggle-born, and I'm not stupid. So stop joshing. I just didn't think you played."
"Sirius is teaching me."
"Poker?"
"Yes. Poker."
"But I really thought you didn't like poker."
"It's the gambling I don't like, and you don't have to gamble to play poker."
"Then what's the point?"
"It's fun."
"…"
"All right, so the game doesn't appeal to me. But Siri wanted to teach me."
"And you just couldn't say no?"
"…"
"Do you gamble?"
"…"
"Remus! You said it yourself you don't like gambling!"
"And as you pointed out, there is no point to playing poker if you don't gamble."
"But…"
"Look, I don't even care about learning the blasted game, I'm just doing it because Siri wanted to teach me."
"And whatever Black wants, Black gets, is that it?"
"I never said that!"
"No, but it's true. You just can't tell him no."
"I can so!"
"When have you ever denied him anything he's wanted?"
"…"
"See! You can't think of anything!"
"What was it you wanted, Lily? Or did you just want to chew me out for learning to play a stupid card game?"
"…"
"Oh, stop pouting and tell me what you want, or I'm going to go to the library to try to get some work done before the others wake up and decide the library isn't exciting enough for them and we should all be in Hogsmeade with the rest of the school."
"Can I ask you something?"
"If you must."
"Will you answer?"
"Why not?"
"Truthfully?"
"You doubt me?"
"I know your friends."
"…"
"Will you answer truthfully?"
"If I must."
"What do you think of Black?"
"Excuse me?"
"Well?"
"Well, Siri's a great friend. Why?"
"No."
"No?"
"I mean, what do you think of him?"
"I don't understand."
"I want to know what you think of him."
"And I told you – "
"But that's not what I meant."
"Lily, if "what do you think of him" means something other than "what do you think of him" then you're going to have to translate for me, because I don't speak Girl."
"You do a lot better than most boys I know."
"Lily."
"Sorry."
"I'm sure."
"Well. Erm. Let's see…"
"The library is calling…"
"Well, I, uh, have a friend who likes Black. Well, I think this friend likes him."
"First of all, his name is Sirius. You've known him long enough to call him by his given name. And secondly, 'a friend?' Lily, we're not twelve."
"I know we're not twelve!"
"Right. So, this hypothetical friend…"
"He is not a hypothetical friend! He's a real, blood and – "
"He?"
"Yes, he!"
"And… and he likes Siri?"
"Yes. Well, I think so. And – "
"Does Siri… like him?"
"I'm sure of it. So – "
"How can you be sure?"
"Come on, Rem. Black… fine, Sirius… is so transparent."
"He is not!"
"Then call it women's intuition."
"Lily!"
"What?"
"He can't like someone!"
"Why not?"
"Because he hasn't said anything to me!"
"Well, of course he hasn't said anything to you!"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Rem, you're awfully worked up. This isn't like you."
"I – "
"Now. As I was saying. My friend. I'm almost positive he likes Sirius. And I know that Sirius likes him. More than likes him. Way more than likes him. Normally, under these circumstances, I'd just tell my friend to bronze his balls and go for it – "
"Lily!"
"– but I'm concerned for my friend."
"Concerned?"
"Well, Sirius is quite the player, isn't he? Well, I mean, he has that reputation. I know most of the girls he's been with have asked him out, but still, there are an awful lot of them, and it never seems to last long. He's never seemed to care much for anyone he was with. Of course, I've only ever been friends with the girls he's gone with. The boys were all older, and in other Houses. I wouldn't presume to ask them about their relationships with a boy I barely know myself."
"He's never been much interested in them. Any of them. Boys or girls. Especially the girls. They all went after him, you know. Boys and girls. He's never asked anybody out, he's just too nice to turn anybody down. He may come off as, well, brash, sometimes, but he's really the sweetest person I know."
"Sweet? Black?"
"I thought you were calling him 'Sirius' now."
"…"
"Lily… you're sure Sirius likes your friend?"
"Yes."
"Positive?"
"Yes."
"It's okay then."
"Rem?"
"If Siri really does like your friend, you have nothing to be concerned about. He's the best man I know. Once he's your friend, he's your friend for life. He would never, ever, hurt anyone he truly cared for, he'd rather die. He wouldn't do something that he knew would make someone else suffer. Not someone he likes, anyway. Not intentionally."
"Rem?"
"I'm fine. There's just something in my eye."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Lily – "
"Will you tell me the truth?"
"Lils – "
"Are you in love with Sirius?"
"What?"
"Just answer me yes or no."
"Why?"
"Yes or no, Remus."
"But – "
"Yes or no."
"Lily – "
"Yes or no!"
"I – "
"Yes or no!"
"Yes!"
"I thought so."
"What?"
"I thought so."
"You – but – Why were you telling me all about Siri and your friend, then? If you already knew how I felt – how I feel – "
"You are the friend, Rem!"
"What?"
"It's you! He likes you!"
"But – "
"He's in love with you!"
"He's – what?"
"He – as in Sirius – is in love with you – as in you, Remus."
"How… how do… how do you…"
"I just know."
"You know?"
"Yes."
"You – you're… you're sure?"
"Yes."
"You're – "
"Tell you what Rem. If you don't believe me now, kiss him."
"What?"
"Kiss him. Then you'll believe me."
"Kiss him?"
"Yes. Just… I don't know. Throw him against the wall and kiss him."
"The wall?"
"Yes. Throw him against the wall and kiss him."
"Throw him against the wall? What wall? What – "
"I don't care what wall. Pick a wall. Just throw him against it and – "
"Lily – "
"– kiss him."
"But – "
"You have three days, Remus."
"Lily – "
"Three days!"
"I – "
"Three! Or you will wish you had."
TBC
To my reviewers:
Captain Oz – Toffee and love hearts? Um… okay…
BrokenChains – That's so sweet!
Kiweeo – Dialogue-fics make me happy, though they're tough, sometimes. The Sirius/serious joke is soooo old, but I still like it anyway. I try to work it into every fic I do at least once, just on principle. Never know which chapter it'll pop up in! lol.
Lieu Of Flowers – Siri's so obvious, isn't he? I mean, do you generally describe your friends as having 'kissable lips'? lol. I'm terrible to my puppies. But I do love them!
Briryan – Didja like this one? I will continue HLtW, but I'm waiting on reviews. And time to write real chapters as opposed to dialogues and oneshots.
marauders4 – lol, I eat a lot of candy, which is really bad. And what's worse… I go out an buy it. So I'm broke and unhealthy. Course, I get my sugar rush in other ways, too. Thus my writing excessive amounts of sap. Lol.
Zevazo – So many people seem to have thought it would be Jamie and Rem, cuz Jamie talked to Siri. Hope you're not disappointed.
Lucky Moony – How'd you like it? Up to your standards for dialogue fics? I'm glad you like the others of mine you've read!
Blackened-wings – Yes, well, Jamie always has something up his sleeve, and Lily's quite the cleverest witch of her age, just like 'Mione is now. Muggle-born gals rock. Never fear, Siri and Rem are destined to be together. My muses will have it no other way.
JulesFire – A three-parter shall be done! Though I can't guarantee when. I wait for 10 reviews before I update anything, that's the rule (for me and a friend of mine, anyway), but I also have very little time to write, so we shall see! Hope you weren't disappointed that it was Lily and Rem talking instead of Jamie and Rem.
A/N: So, yeah. What'd you think? Several people thought Jamie was gonna talk to Rem, too, but Lily needed to do it. Because, well, because that's what my muses said. So, there will be one more part, when I get my 10 reviews (I'm such a review whore), and when I have time to write it up, cuz I haven't done that yet. It's still, er, locked safe in my head. A lot of you want HLtW to continue. I have started working on the next bit of that (not done yet, though), but I'm still waiting on reviews. Anyway, review this and tell me what you thought :big hugs for everyone: