A/N I swear, this summer thing is really good for my imagination. I've been on constant type for days now. I can't seem to get my mind to stop working. It's really interferring with my sleep habits. lol.Well... here we are. The next chappie. Thanks to...

demeanted-dreamer: Yes... much chance for fluff. I love fluff. Thinking of writing a story of pure fluff after this story is finished.

Fyr's Shadow: Well... I updated. But I think I left off at a cliffie again. lol. Not sure.

cherryfaerie: Glad you're still reading. You've been here since the beginng. Much appreciations to you!

A Dragon's Rose: New reader! yay! Glad you like it.

...: Sorry, trying to stop the cliffie's. I hate them myself, but asI writer, you have to see the appeal of them. It keeps ther reader's hooked in, right? lol. Well... yeah... thanks for reading.

Wingedrider: Read and find out, my dear.

warrior of tortall: I'm glad you think this is the most amazing story.

Zerrion: So many questions! lol. Okay... I'll answer what I can. The man that Tori fought, the first one, will be important later, but until then, that's all I can say. And no, she hasn't fought him before. But that's saying more then I wanted to. But I'll give you that. Thanks for reading!

cloverluck11: okay!

Chapter Thirteen:

With a strangled sound, she reached up and felt the hair that was flowing down her back. She had worn her hair down for so many years she hadn't registered the feel of it against her back, hadn't noticed that she no longer wore her concealing wig.

She turned to Jon and saw him staring at her in awe even as his eyes fell to her chest. The corset, she thought, looking down also. Obviously something had happened to it, for it was clearly visible that no longer did she have the appearance of a boyish figure, but that of the woman she truly was.

She vaguely remembered the sound of cloth that she had heard ripping and realized it must have been the corset. She was only thankful that Derek was unconscious and couldn't see her.

"I can explain," she told Jon even as she bent to retrieve the wig from the water. Still Jon made no sound. She turned to look at him once more, but his gaze was still fixed on her now very apparent breasts. She crossed her arms over them and glared at him. That seemed to bring him out of his stupor.

"You just saved my life," he whispered faintly, his voice beginning to take on color, and the color was that of disgust. "I was saved by a girl! How will I ever live this down?"

She couldn't help it, she laughed, her deep, tinkling, girly laugh. Jon seemed mesmerized by it. She blushed, not sure why it would matter that a little boy seemed to find her mesmerizing.

"Listen Jon, I really can explain," she whispered to him, but he shook his head.

"I understand. You're just like the Lioness right? You wanted to be a warrior but you knew how hard it was for girls, didn't you? So you just decided to do it the easy way and dress like a boy, right?"

She thought about explaining all the complicated things that had actually brought about her dressing like a boy, but looked at his face instead. He was excited by the thought of her doing something devious to be a warrior. "Something like that, yes."

"That is the neatest thing I've ever heard!" he exclaimed, running to her and demanding of her thousands of questions. She laughed again.

"But Jon, this has to be a secret. No one can know that I'm a woman. If they did, they'd take away my chance at being a warrior. You wouldn't want that would you?" she whispered, her eyes taking on a faint puppy dog look. Jon shook his head vehemently.

"I'll keep your secrets. You can count on me!" She smiled and because she couldn't help it, she hugged him close to her, squishing his face against her breasts as she kissed his head, much as she had done to Robert's little sisters.

When she let him go, it was to see his face bright with a blush. She laughed once more and realized that this was the most she had laughed in the longest time.

"Come lets set up camp. Derek needs to be kept warm if he's to ever wake up," she smiled and set about getting a camp made.

After Jon had fallen asleep by the campfire late that night, Tori set about to mending her corset. Upon examination, she found that it wasn't broken, as she had suspected. The laces had been ripped open by the rope that had still been knotted around her waist was all. And when the laces had come loose, it had slid down, thus allowing Jon the show that he saw. She quickly did up the laces once more and then pinned her wig back in place.

She had to say though, she didn't feel as if her secret was doomed now. Jon respected her greatly, even more now that he knew she was a woman. He had fallen in love with the daring of her "story". If he knew the truth, he probably would have loved it more, but she couldn't afford to tell him the truth.

She sighed, looking at the man sleeping close to the fire. Derek still hadn't awoken from his fall and she was beginning to worry. But she was certain when he woke in the morning he would be fine. She had to believe it. With a deep breath, she lay down close to him, incase he needed her in the night of course, and drifted to sleep

She sighed, gathering the newest bouquet of roses into her arms. She really must tell him to stop giving these to her. She realized, that though she did love him, it wasn't really a passionate love. Over the many months that she had spent time with him, she had realized he had become more of a father figure to her, then a lover.

He was just so much older then her. More her mother's age. And though she did enjoy the flattery, it didn't help with her image. She would give him back the flowers and tell him that it had to stop. She was certain it would be for the best of all of them.

She didn't bother to knock on his chamber door, it was her palace after all. But when she looked upon the sight in his room, she wished she had. The roses fell gently to the floor even as she crushed those that her hands could reach in her tightened fists.

There, in the middle of his room, stood him, the man that she thought had loved her, and her mother, locked in an embrace of passion. All she could see of her mother was his tanned hand tangled in her glorious blond hair. A strangled sound of frustration escaped her throat even as she slammed from the room.

"Lee!" the man, she couldn't bare to think of his name it would hurt too much, called after her as she stormed down the hall. "Wait!"

She whipped around, her beautiful features carved in stone. "You, soldier, are to address me as Commander or Your Excellency, is that understood?"

"But Lee—" he tried to reason, but she would have none of it. She should have known, she thought as she gave him a look that had others begging for forgiveness. "I'm sorry, Your Excellency. I won't slip up again."

She nodded and swept down the corridor, already planning how she would be able to escape to her cove for an hour or two to get over this betrayal. She should have known that her mother would steal him from her. Hadn't she tried to take everything else?

Her fists clenched once more as her feet slammed into the ground. Her jaw was clenched so tight her teeth were squeaking. But she didn't care. It didn't matter that her mother had betrayed her, that the man she had thought loved her had betrayed her. She was used to it. And if she wasn't used to it, she should be now. After all, wasn't her life filled with it? Unbidden to her came the memory that had shattered her world nearly twelve years before.

The little girl, cute with her hair up in braids, a chocolate smear on the corner of her mouth, skipped to the door of the library to peak in. After her chocolate cookie, she got it because she had been able to play the music piece that her teacher had had her memorize, she wanted to sit in the library and read.

At seven, she still had hopes that if she were smart enough, maybe her mother would smile at her. Maybe… maybe even give her a pat on the head. Just one pat. She knew that two pats were out of the question, and a hug impossible, but she would settle for a pat. A pat meant that her mother would see her. Marian, her nurse, had told her once, when she had been reading her a bed time story, that mother's loved smart children, funny children, who were always on their best behavior and never were bad.

Upon hearing that, she had decided that she would do her best to be that kind of child. Then her mother would love her. That's why she wanted to read more today. Marian had told her that reading made a person smart. Marian had also said that she loved her, but it wasn't the same to Lee. She wanted everyone to love her. But not just everyone, her mother in particular.

When she reached the library door, she stopped. She could hear voices talking in a hushed tones. Naturally curious, she stopped to listen. Soon, though, she would wish she hadn't.

"The little Princess played wonderfully today, your highness," That was Marian's voice. Lee could always pick it out. It was quivery and old sounding, even though she knew that Marian wasn't much older then thirty.

"Does it appear to you, servant, that I care? Haven't I told you she's beneath my notice?" Lee cringed. That was her mother. Her mother was always sounding like that, cranky and nasty and mean. She only needed to smile. Just once, and she would feel better. Not like how she smiled at parties, that was a fake smile. Lee was the one that was going to make her smile once more, a real smile.

"No your highness. It doesn't appear that way. Not to me and not to that little child, that innocent little child," Marian whispered. Lee knew that voice, new it for what it was. Marian was struggling against harsh words. What was this? But then she understood.

"Innocent?" her mother screeched, her voice loud and hysterical. "That child isn't innocent! She bears the sins of her father! Her murderous bastard of a father! The man that raped me! That forced me to have that wretched thing that you dare to call mine! I would as soon claim that child, that demon, as mine as I would welcome my husband into my bed! Just the sight of her makes me sick. I can't stand how everyone worships the ground she walks on! She's a monster, fathered by a monster! And she is nothing to me! She should be nothing to everyone! That's what she deserves and that's what she will get!"

Lee heard her mother stalking to the door, but she couldn't make herself move. Her small legs had been frozen in place, her feet rooted to the ground by the feeling that was welling inside her as fast as the tears were welling in her eyes.

And those tear filled eyes stared up at the watery image of the woman who she had worshiped since she was little, the woman who she had tried so hard to please. The woman who thought she was nothing.

Her mother stared down at her for a second, and Lee could read the utter disgust in her gray eyes. "You may bear my blood and my name, but you are not mine. You are nothing. Get out of my sight!" the words seethed from her.

But Lee could do nothing, she was still frozen. With pain. "I said get out of my sight!" She screamed it that time, and struck Lee across the face, knocking her back. Her mother didn't even bother to see if she was all right before she strode down the hall, her blond hair flying back behind her as she left.

She shook the memory from her, and relaxed her clenched fists. It meant nothing to her. She had hardened herself against these kinds of thoughts, these memories. She didn't need them, didn't need a mother. She didn't need anything. Or anyone.

"Lee!" she spun and faced the man running towards her. It was too late for her to escape the confrontation now, and she had left her rocks back in her room with her sword. She would take to carrying those around from now on, she decided, though she knew she needed no protection within the palace walls. Her city was safe. But was her heart?

"Soldier? Is that they way you address your commanding officer?" she demanded, her face and eyes shuttering her true feelings. This man had lost his privilege of seeing into her when he had kissed her mother. He had severed all bonds when he had betrayed her. Soon, she would see that he was shipped out to the front line. He was worthless as a fighter, but it was the punishment he deserved after the things he had done to her.

"Lee don't do this. Don't shut me out like this," he was panicked, she could hear it in his voice.

"I? Shut you out?" she gave him a belittling smile and shrugged carelessly. "Why should a mere soldier be allowed to see the true me? After all, you are just a common soldier, unworthy of what I have given you."

She saw the anger rise and was glad of it. Maybe it would hurt. Even a small hurt would satisfy her. Revenge was something she believed fully. After all, wasn't this war she had created based on revenge also?

"I think it best you return to the bunkhouse, soldier. The nobles won't want to be hindered by your commoner's presence."

"Lee," his voice was a chocked whisper. Ah, yes. He was hurting now. But before she could turn to leave, he grabbed her arms and pulled her back to him. "Why are you doing this to me?"

"To you? You think you hurt? How do you think I felt when I saw you kissing my mother you bastard!" she shrieked it, right in his face, so angry she couldn't hold it back, couldn't gain control. Never, not since that night, had she ever been this out of control. She had always iced her emotions back over so fast. But not this time. Not him.

She had finally allowed someone into her heart, finally given her love, even if it was only the love she would give to a father, and he had betrayed her like this. How could she not react?

"I trusted you! I thought you were on my side! I loved you like a father! And I thought you loved me like your daughter! How could you do this to me? How?" she was beating at his chest, and she knew it hurt. She was no weak female. But he wasn't making a sound, only staring down at her.

"What's so wrong with me loving both of you? Why can't I have you both? You, you're like a daughter to me Lee. You know I love you. And your mother…she's… I love her also. I want to marry her Lee. Then you would bemy daughter, for real!What's so wrong with that?"

"How can you say that? How can you love her? How can you love that cold-hearted bitch? Do you even now what she is? She's a cold bitch who only thinks of herself!" she spat it out at him, and saw that what she had said cut deep. His eyes hardened as his hands tightened around her upper arms, bruising.

"You won't speak of her that way, Lee. Not about the woman I love or about your mother," he gave her a shake, sending her teeth knocking together. But it did anything but give her sense. It only made her want to scream louder. But she couldn't. The way to win was never through outbursts but through calm control. With a deep breath she summoned the ice.

"I don't have a mother, soldier," her voice was icy cold, dead. She had regained control once more. She knew now that nothing she said would change his mind. She only wanted away from him so she could lick her wounds in private. "She disowned me long ago." With that she wrenched free. Or tried to.

"What do you mean Lee? What's this about disowning you?" he asked, staring deep into her eyes. She no longer had the strength to shutter them and he saw the truth. "When was this?"

"Before my husband died. I think… she was seven," her voice floated like music and settled around them, calming him, but only making her angrier.

"I'm surprised you took notice of my age mother. After all, didn't you yourself claim I was beneath your notice?"

"Boy!" the shout had her eye's flying open, reaching for the sword clasped to her waist, her eyes searching everywhere around her. She took note of Jon sleeping soundly across the dieing flames before they rested on the green-brown eyes glittering at her from mere inches away.

"Boy, you're laying on my arm," now that she was fully awake, she took note of where she was and realized she was indeed laying on Derek's arm. And his leg. And his side. Basically, she had plastered herself to him, throwing her leg over his hips.

She blushed to the roots of her hair and scrambled away. It wasn't her fault really, she thought as she tried to control her embarrassment. It had been cold in the night, and her cloths had still been partially wet. She had only been seeking out warmth.

"I'm sorry," she stammered, wringing her hands in her lap. She scowled when Derek laughed. "I don't find it at all funny, sir."

He only laughed harder and tried to stand. A cry of pain and surprise tore from his throat when he moved his left leg. He gasped, sitting up and reaching for the offending leg.

But Tori was already there, slapping away his hands and feeling up along its length. About half way up his leg, she found the break. She knew it was bad, really bad. She frowned worriedly up at him, not sure what to do. She had never fixed a broken leg before. An arm yes, but a leg was different. And when she had fixed the arm, all she had really down was hold the girls uninjured hand while the girl's brother had fixed it.

Other then that, she'd never been around broken bones before. What really worried her though, was the fact that Derek was basically immovable with a broken leg. She had to do something, she knew they couldn't stay there. They had to move to be found, get back to the main rode. And they had to get there soon so they could get his leg fixed. And her ribs.

She remembered her ribs now. Now that they were screaming at her. In fact, it seemed that the only one who had been undamaged in the fall was Jon, how very ironic, seeing how they had jumped off to save him. But she had to get them to a town before something worse happened.

"Do you know what to do for my leg?" Derek asked her, but he knew the answer. He could see the panic forming on her features even as she stared down at his leg. "I'll walk you through it. Now, I want you to go get some sturdy branches okay? While you're doing that, I'll cut strips to use as bindings from you shirt."

He saw her freeze at the sound of that. And he frowned wondering at it. Why should she be upset about taking off her shirt? It wasn't like they weren't all guys.

"Your shirt is bigger, we should cut yours," she offered hurriedly, almost slipping over her words in her haste to save her own skin. Before he could counter act her suggestion, she scurried into the trees and began searching for logs. She was frustrated when she found her hands weren't quite steady.

It was stupid… there hadn't been any chance at all that Derek would have found out in that moment. She was just being paranoid. That was really all there was too it. She had escaped smooth as glass and he would think nothing of it. Right?

A/N Welp... that was that. One quick reminder. When Derek is talking of Tori or thinking of her, I used feminine pronouns, but he still doesn't know. Got that? kk. And also, that was a flashback within a vision. Okay? If you have any questions, just ask. Review me!

Nubia