Carter was very careful to be quiet as he walked into the bedroom. Randi was asleep and he didn't want to wake her. Granted, the sun was coming up, but it was six in the morning, and he had no idea when she had gone to bed the night before. At least the house is warm, he thought as he struggled out of his cold clothes. And I have a nice warm bed to crawl into, he thought with a small smile.
He hadn't found any sign of Doug. He had spent the entire day looking and a good portion of the evening. He had tried to sleep but his dreams had been very bad. He had started back around two in the morning. The trip had been a lot faster since he wasn't looking, but it had made him feel bad. Doug was a bit of a jerk and it still made Carter mad that Doug had taken advantage of Harper, but that was in the past. The odds were against Harper even being alive so it seemed petty to hold onto his anger. Besides, it wasn't like Harper was the true love of his life.
He looked down at the woman sleeping on the bed. Randi was lying on her side, her long dark hair spilled out across the pillows. I love Randi. The thought shocked him at first, but as he let it roll around in his head, it simply felt right. He was in love. He was in love with Randi Fronzac. It made him feel suddenly warm, despite the bone deep chill in his bones. Suddenly all he wanted was to be next to her.
He slid into bed and put his arms around her. She stirred but he could tell she was only half awake. " Did you find anything?" she asked sleepily.
He held her close, letting her warm body take away some of the cold. " I didn't. Maybe Luka will have better luck." He had a feeling Luka had picked up the right track, and as of late he had started to trust those feelings more and more. Human beings weren't separated from animals by more than ten percent of their genetic makeup and instinct still had a place in the world. More so now that all of the technical toys that killed instinct were gone. As he had wandered around, trying to track Doug, he had found himself feeling oddly in tune with the world. At one point he watched as a deer and its two fawns grazed on some boxes of cereal that were lying in the street, and he had been able to within ten feet of the peaceful animals. In the time before, such a move would have been impossible for John Truman Carter, SuperKlutz.
I've changed, he thought as he curled around Randi, and its not all bad. He had worried, worried incessantly early on, that he was close to snapping. That time in the car dealership, where Jeanie had been attacked, he had almost killed the man. It hadn't been until almost a day later that he had really thought about what he had wanted to do and it had made him feel awful. It had felt as though all he needed was a crisis and he would revert to violence. Now though, not only was he starting to see just how badly he had been in shock, he was also understanding that people didn't handle things the same. He had been overloaded with concern and the very notion that some outsider to his small group would dare even think of attacking one of them had set off his rage. It was instinct, pure and simple. Instinct that had it's up and down side. It was instinct that had led them to Colorado, instinct and perhaps some higher power. Maybe, he thought sleepily, without electricity and everything that comes with it, we simply see more. Maybe we are more.
Randi stirred in his arms. He held her, breathing in her scent. Randi always smelled faintly of Ivory Soap, but overlying that was a gentle, tangy citrus scent. Oranges, he mused, or maybe grapefruit. That morning, he had seen the Northern Lights for the first time ever. Light pollution from the teeming masses had always hidden the sky. Maybe people pollution kept me from seeing Randi, he thought. He had known Randi for years, and yet he had never really seen her. She had been in the background, like another piece of furniture littered around the admit area, noticed only when he needed her services. It made him feel bad, to realize that yes, he had been that shallow. He hadn't bothered to get to know Randi because until the plague, there had been no reason to. He rarely bothered to learn the names of the non-medical staffers since they rarely stayed long. He had simply not seen the need in knowing Randi. She "wasn't the right sort" as his father often said. The right sort was typically some debutante or daughter of some wealthy scion of Chicago society. No, his father would not have liked Randi at all.
Gamma would have liked Randi though. He smiled at the thought. Underneath her harsh exterior, Gamma had a core of common sense and humor that had surprised him when he was old enough to see her as more than just family. Gamma would have taken one look at Randi, and nod with approval. She'll clean up well, the older woman would have said. Then she would have put herself to the task of making Randi presentable to the rest of the family. He chuckled to himself.
" What's so funny?" Randi asked. Her words were slurred with sleep.
" My grandmother would have liked you." He could feel her body shake with laughter. " Its really not that funny," he said softly. " I was just thinking that Gamma was a lot like you. Practical and classy."
" Hmmm I remind you of your grandmother. I feel so sexy now." Her body untensed in his arms. " Your family would have thrown a fit if you had brought me home."
" True," he admitted. " But Gamma would have defended us. " He hesitated. It didn't feel like the right time but he wanted to say it. " Randi, I love you. You know that, don't you?"
" Mmmh hhhmmm" she murmured.
He decided to move forward. He felt awkward but it seemed like as good of a time as any. " I mean... I love you. I want to be with you forever. I know we're not exactly...in a position to formalize our relationship, but I want to get you a ring. Would you like a ring? A diamond ring? Like an engagement ring?"
" Mmmmmm"
" It doesn't have to be a diamond. I think you'd look lovely with sapphires."
" Hmmm mmm"
His eyes narrowed. " Randi, I want you to get a gerbil, shave it, and then insert it in my prostate for my sexual pleasure, ok?"
" Mmmmmm"
" Randi, I think there's pancakes downstairs."
" Mmmmm pancakes..." Then she giggled. He knew better than to pursue it. Randi's dreams, when she had good dreams, were generally filled with laughter. I'll get her a ring as a surprise then, he decided as he fell further into sleep. Maybe diamonds and sapphires. And hopefully Doug, Luka, and Lucy will be back today.