Part 2
No, this was not happening. Rodney could not be dead. Sheppard stared back at Beckett's stunned face. It didn't work like this. They would pull McKay out and Beckett would perform a miracle; then Rodney would sit up sneezing out dust and complaining about being dragged away from his latest toy.
A further earth tremor shook the room. Severe enough to dislodge larger fragments of rock and debris, the quake brought Sheppard's thoughts back to the immediate danger. A deep metallic groaning from above caused both himself and Beckett to look up to the ceiling in alarm.
Sheppard was the first to react. He lunged towards McKay, calling out to Beckett. "Doctor, help me get Rodney out of here! The ceiling's coming down!" Each with a hand on McKay's shoulder harness, Sheppard and Beckett started for the doorway at a crouched run.
Before they had taken three steps, a final violent shock sent both men sprawling to the ground and the sound of tearing metal filled the room. Sheppard lifted his head to see the huge rusted ceiling support falling towards them. He reached out, grabbing McKay's arm, as the beam fell, but could only watch in horror as it landed squarely across McKay's legs, pinning him to the stone floor.
Ignoring the increasing danger from falling rubble, Sheppard released Rodney's limp arm and started to crawl back towards the heavy metal beam, dust blurring his vision. As he reached out, a large section of the ceiling, now unsupported, crashed to the floor beside him. Beckett's hand grabbed hold of his shoulder and pulled him away, forcing him towards the hazy light of the doorway.
Ford's anxious voice called from the wide exit as the two men emerged, coughing, into the open. Moments later, the remaining metal girders supporting the roof failed under the immense weight of the rock above, crashing down into the cave with a deafening roar. Shielding the two men from the falling wreckage, Lieutenant Ford steered them away from the entrance and watched in concern as they stooped, hands on knees, gulping in fresh, clean air.
Leaving Teyla to tend to the gasping men, Ford returned to look back into the cave as the rumbling died away and a final cloud of dust and debris billowed from the doorway.
"Rodney?" Sheppard's hoarse whisper degenerated into a fit of coughing as he blinked dust-filled eyes. Forcing himself upright he staggered back to the entrance.
Outside the cave, the quake had done little damage and Sheppard was unprepared for the scene of destruction inside. Wreckage filled the room and a tangle of metal ceiling struts criss-crossed the entrance, completely blocking the doorway, leaving only small gaps through which the full extent of the collapse could be seen.
Sheppard started pulling frantically at the debris closest to the door, succeeding only in dislodging a new avalanche of rocks and wreckage which poured through the doorway, causing him to step hastily out of the way. He turned to the rest of the team, "If we can find something to lever up this spar, I think we could get to him."
"Major," Beckett's voice was thick with emotion, and stopped Sheppard in his tracks. "He was dead before the ceiling fell on him! Look at it! It would be suicide to try to get back in there now!"
Sheppard stared into the swirling clouds of dust as a third man ran, stumbling, from the room and stopped beside him, exclaiming in a relieved voice, "Oh thank God. I thought I was going to die in there."
"We can't just leave him in there!" Sheppard's angry shout brought a look of surprise to McKay's face as Beckett turned and gestured wildly at the blocked doorway.
"Look at it Major. It would take a bloody JCB to dig him out!"
"Who? Who are we talking about? Dig who out?" McKay looked in confusion at the two shouting men, but neither of them showed any indication that they had heard his questions. "Carson? Major Sheppard? Am I talking to myse...?"
"Major Sheppard," McKay stopped short, taken aback at Teyla's uncharacteristically rude interruption. He stared at her as she continued speaking. "What has happened? Where is Dr McKay?"
Rodney frowned at the baffling question and responded, with a puzzled look. "What do you mean? I'm right ..."
Again, McKay was abruptly cut off. "Rodney's still in the cave." Sheppard's softly spoken words carried far more passion than his previous angry yells.
Teyla's eyes widened in comprehension. She turned to look at Beckett as if seeking for a different explanation for Sheppard's words. Finding none, she lowered her head in understanding.
Carson nodded sadly. "Aye lass, I'm afraid he's gone."
"Gone? I'm not 'gone'. I'm right here." McKay walked over to Sheppard and stood directly in front of him. "Major?" He raised his hand in front of Sheppard's eyes and clicked his fingers rapidly. "Major? Can you see me?"
Suddenly, Sheppard stepped forward to peer further into the gloomy interior of the cave. Caught by surprise, McKay was too slow to dodge out of his way, but, instead of the clash of shoulders he expected, he felt an unpleasant tingling sensation as the Major walked right through him.
Xx oOo xX
Dr Rodney McKay stared morosely through the doorway and into the cave; silent now, except for the steady drip of water and the occasional creak of settling debris. Rationally, of course, he had always known that one day he would die, that your name went on the waiting list the moment you were born, but he had never truly believed that it would actually happen to him.
McKay felt his anger surge. This had to be a mistake. The universe had got it wrong somehow; failing to appreciate that people needed him, relied on him. There were even some that might simply miss him.
He looked at Sheppard standing beside him, gazing through the door at the devastation beyond, the blood dripping from his hands and arms evidence of his attempts to make his way back into the cave by main force.
This should not have happened.
And not only was he dead, but, apparently, he was a ghost. He couldn't be a ghost, he didn't believe in ghosts.
McKay was unsure of what was meant to happen next. His childhood hadn't been spent sitting around campfires with friends, telling ghost stories. What little knowledge he had of the spirit world was gleaned from TV shows such as 'The Outer Limits' and 'The Twilight Zone'.
So, how did you become a ghost?
First and foremost, you had to be dead...obviously. Well, he seemed to have managed that with his usual lack of grace and style. It wasn't the way he would have chosen to die. A mountain had fallen on him. And that's what everyone would remember, no matter what his achievements had been in life. Not much of an epitaph for his gravestone was it? 'Here lies the body of Dr Rodney McKay. A mountain fell on him.' Only there wouldn't be a gravestone or even a grave. His mortal remains would be here, on an empty planet in another galaxy, far from home.
So much for posterity.
What else did you need to become a ghost? The phrase 'unfinished business' made its way to his consciousness. 'Unfinished business.' That just about summed up his entire life. No wife. No kids. Although, to be honest with himself, he didn't think that that was the sort of 'unfinished business' that a ghost could complete. Unless there had been a couple of 'R' rated episodes of 'The Twilight Zone' that he'd missed.
The sound of voices finally penetrated his shocked brain and he turned from the door and listened to his team.
Carson was explaining to Ford and Teyla that he had already been dead even before the roof had come down.
He couldn't remember that. He did remember trying to find a way to remove the sphere, then Sheppard telling him to leave it. Then he was standing in the room watching Carson push Sheppard through the doorway, as all hell broke loose around them.
"Major Sheppard." Teyla's soft voice again brought him back to their conversation. "Dr Beckett is correct. There is nothing we can do here. We must return to Atlantis and inform Dr Weir of Dr McKay's death."
On the last word, Sheppard's shoulders fell and his head bowed slightly. He stood in silence for several seconds before he straightened his back and spoke in a strangely neutral tone. "You're right. Let's go."
Xx oOo xX
Elizabeth Weir looked across the gateroom as Sheppard led his team and Dr Beckett back through the Stargate. The usual activity in the gateroom was a general background as she walked over to greet them, smiling at the comical sight of Sheppard and Beckett covered in grey dust, their hair and clothing releasing fine clouds as they stepped away from the gate. Her smile turned to a concerned frown as she noticed McKay's absence.
"Major, where's Rodney?" Her frown deepened as Sheppard gave no immediate reply, but instead continued standing before the gate, staring directly ahead. Looking from face to serious face, her concern grew with every second of silence.
No-one remarked when the gate stayed open a few extra seconds, nor as a fifth figure stepped through to Atlantis.
"Carson?" Elizabeth's concern turned rapidly to fear when the physician failed to meet her eyes. When the gate closed behind the team, a gradual drop in conversation ran through the room as the gateroom personnel began to become aware that McKay had not come back with the team.
"John?" Dr Weir returned her attention to the Major, her voice urgent. "Major? What happened?"
She hardly recognised the impersonal voice with which Sheppard answered. "Dr Weir, I regret to inform you that Dr McKay died on M3X-925. His body cannot be safely reached, and I recommend that no attempt be made to recover it."
The gateroom fell into silence and all activity ceased as Sheppard made his dispassionate report.
"My God, John. What happened?" Her voice sounded unnaturally loud in the silent room, but Sheppard showed no signs of hearing and continued to stare unblinkingly ahead.
"It was in the cave they found." Dr Beckett's soft brogue wrenched her eyes from Sheppard's face. "Rodney had found a device and was trying to get it loose to bring it back, when it shot some kind of energy beam at him. He was dead before he hit the ground."
Elizabeth missed the slight twitch of Sheppard's eye at Beckett's words, her mind was too busy refusing to accept what she was hearing.
"We tried to get him out." Carson continued, "But there was an earthquake and the entire roof came down. There was nothing anyone could have done."
The last words were directed at the Major, still standing in silence, but once again he showed no signs of hearing.
Dr Weir looked desperately to the rest of Sheppard's team; searching for an indication that this was all a misunderstanding. Ford stood to attention, taking his lead from Sheppard's own stance. Teyla, her eyes downcast, radiated sorrow. Elizabeth's eyes passed over the final team member as McKay walked across the gateroom to stand in his accustomed position at her side.
"John, I..." Elizabeth's faltering words were cut off as Sheppard's impersonal voice coldly interrupted.
"Dr Weir, if I might be dismissed? There are some things that I have to attend to."
"Of course, John," Elizabeth felt bewildered at his behaviour. "I'll need your debriefing as soon as you feel ready, but you and your team are off active duty for as long as you need."
For the first time since his return to Atlantis, Sheppard looked directly at her. "Why?" he asked, with a frown.
Stunned by the question, Elizabeth took a moment to phrase a reply. "I... I thought that you might want some time to get over this." It was more an imploring question than an answer.
Beside her, Rodney stared at Sheppard in hurt confusion.
"Dr McKay isn't the first team member I've ever lost." Major Sheppard again turned his face away and stared straight ahead. "Just give me a couple of days to find a replacement." Without waiting for further permission, Sheppard walked out past stunned personnel, the silence remaining until he had left the gateroom.
A Marine at the top of the gateroom staircase slowly shook his head and turned to whisper to the scientist by his side. "And I thought that McKay was an insensitive bastard." The whispered remark barely reached Elizabeth's ears but she turned, her eyes flashing in anger, to see who had made it.
"Easy, Elizabeth." Carson had obviously heard it too, but his voice remained calm and quiet. "Grief takes people in different ways. We're all going to need a little time."
Xx oOo xX
Sheppard walked slowly into the long room that had been set up as a firing range and carefully placed three P-90 magazines on the low table in front of him.
Behind him, a second, unseen figure entered through the door. McKay was unsure why he was following Sheppard; his words in the gateroom had hurt like a physical blow and now he felt lost and alone in the huge city. There was nothing for him to be doing, nothing he could do, so he followed Sheppard.
"Come for some target practice, Sir?" The Range Officer, a young Sergeant, looked over from his own table and nodded respectfully at the Major who was checking over his P-90 and loading the first magazine.
"Yeah, something like that. Set me one up." Sheppard's attitude told the Sergeant more clearly than words that he was not in a talkative mood.
A standard, human-shaped target rose from the floor in front of Sheppard. The first short burst hit with controlled accuracy. Then a longer, more concentrated volley ripped the centre from the target. The Range Officer watched as Sheppard emptied the first magazine into the shape.
The P-90 fell silent and the young Sergeant got ready to set up a second target. "Sir, shall I ...?"
Sheppard had already reloaded and began to fire down the range. The target had long since been completely obliterated, but the sound of automatic fire continued to fill the room. As more shots left the weapon, McKay looked up at Sheppard's face. He could see Sheppard shouting as he fired, but the thunder of the P-90 drowned out the words. Suddenly the magazine emptied and, as the sound of the last shots died away, Rodney heard Sheppard's final anguished cry.
"...stupid Canadian son-of-a-bitch!"
"Sir?" The Range Officer sounded unsure of what he had just seen and heard.
Sheppard rounded on him, his eyes blazing. "Something wrong, Sergeant?"
McKay could see the pain and anger in Sheppard's eyes. The Sergeant saw only the anger.
"Sir, no Sir!" He stood to attention. "It's just...no, nothing Sir. Good shooting Sir!"
Sheppard turned back to the table and reached for the third magazine, his face once more blank.
"Major, stop! This isn't doing you any good." McKay unthinkingly reached out to restrain Sheppard's arm, then looked down at his hand in surprise as he felt a slight resistance.
He raised his eyes to see Sheppard staring at him with a puzzled frown.
"Rodney?"