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Disclaimer: I don't own, you know sue!
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.::Love* Is* A* Distant* Dream::.
.::Six::.
Savage Again_______________________________________________________________________________________________
.::Sakura's Point Of View::.
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I clapped as long as I can remember I clapped but my hands weren't the only ones. The whole auditorium had broken into a fantastic applause and I saw proudly as my friend Madison bowed down. Her performance was excellent and she deserved these rhythmic praises from people. The curtains came down and I rushed down to see Madison backstage. I know she would be gleaming with joy she had been practicing for like hundreds of hours for this day. She had been singing beautifully and her singing was so sweet that it actually put a spell over an audience –they couldn't take my eyes of her. She had worn a crimson dress that really did match her condition at that time. Though I thought the others hadn't noticed but I saw her blushing and she was so nervous but somehow this super natural force was able to blanket those from the body of people who truly appreciated her beauty. I raced across the sea of bodies when I finally arrived at my destination I saw a horde of individuals praising her. Nikki, Chelsea, Khushi, Rita, et cetera. I felt some sort of unusual depression sweep over me. I wished I arrived here first, a thought found a way in my consciousness; After all I am her best friend.
Madison waving her hand had brought me back from those rogue thoughts and I smiled obviously elated. I had this immense feeling that she might get offers to sing professionally; there were many acquaintances of the principle who could be described well off in those sort of entertaining businesses and I had no doubt that one of then had an invitation to this recital and had actually arrived.
'Hey Madison, you were so divine!' I let all the enthusiasm out as I neared her and embraced her. Nothing could actually aid me to express the feeling running through my soul as if they were vehicles attached to the prospect of winning a race.
She hugged me back but her grip around me was a little more than necessary as if she were trying to thank me for something…but what?
'Oh Sakura…' she looked like she was going to cry, 'I couldn't have done anything without you.' She was really making me quizzical now.
'Huh.' Was all that I could utter. The deep reasons of my mind seemed to tap on ever folder of my inner recesses as if they were invisible fingers and they were tapping on some keyboard and were trying to search and bring the answer on my mind so I could understand why Madison was showering me with her endless appreciation, both vocally and in body language.
'Sakura, like why are you looking so puzzled for?' Madison had bemusement lurking on her, 'You are the one who helped me.'
'But Madison what did I help you with?' I was now more startled then before. I sought and opened every memory that was available within my grasp. Madison was saying I helped her…how? I mean I couldn't have helped her sing cause I was not a participant in this entertaining display. I had only watched her express such sweet music, which converted more into heavenly honey for her great mastery of her own vocal chords.
'You know Sakura, it is in these moments of time that I really ponder how you can stand first in our class.' Madison gave me an annoyed look as she teased me with the remark.
I could only merely giggle, Madison was right in some way I was truly clueless in some aspects in life while I was completely exceeding in others. Well, I really wanted to know what Madison was talking about, 'Ok, tell me Madison, what are you talking about.'
'Ok, who was the one giving me all that courage all this time, whose the one who made me valiant and gave me enough confidence to succeed. I was so nervous that I was going to quit but who told me to hold on and keep on practicing to make it the best.'
I smiled; yes I'd done all those things. I was the one who had said all those things to her but I had no prior knowledge that she would think of these encouragements of mine as high factors to her success. Well, now I was going to exit this place though my heart longed to stay I could not.
Eli.
He had threatened me again. Oh, how serious his words were one could only learn through the stages of raw experience. I did not care bout my well being, my friend's meant more. He had threatened to hurt Nikki, the most vulnerable person from our group. She was a standard bookroom and was far more interested in the world of the supernatural rather than curricular activities. I feared her health the most for she was like a twig, which could easily be snapped. I had had enough on Eli's threats, one would truly reach and break all the boundaries of exasperation when this perpetual ordeal had surpassed its extensive limit but I was I to do. Eli's father was a well-to-do businessman and law was on his side. It was finding a needle in a haystack to find a way to win against them in court.
Madison too was ready to calm down. Her performance was over and now others were going to recite their songs. I had decided to leave quickly nor else Eli would have an endless brigade of questions, which I'm not in any mood to answer too, 'Uh, Madison I got to leave.'
'Really,' I saw the startled expression on her face, 'Why so?'
'I have a lunch date with Eli.' I said plainly.
'Oh, but you have to stay for a while though.' She smiled, 'I've got another solo from the music teacher isn't that great!'
I tried to smile, really I did. But the nerve endings of my face seemed to have paralyzed that the color of my face drained away and suddenly I felt I developed and exoskeleton for my flesh seemed to have deteriorated all of a sudden.
I didn't hear right did I? Madison got another recital but she didn't mention it on the phone. I found perspiration so deep that it suddenly started digging a grave to bury me inside. Or maybe, I was already inside the solitary confinements of the coffin, I just didn't know so…
'Wow Madison,' I gave a nervous laugh and tried my hardest to create a counter curse to destroy the spell cast upon my face and produce a smile, 'You…You never mentioned this over the phone.'
'Well it was a surprise for me too.' Madison still had a happy and dreamy tone to her voice which made guilt close in for its kill upon me, I knew that this type of remorse was so foreign to me that I wished that I could leave it but it managed to cling on like a little woodpecker eager to keep on penetrating its tree of choice. 'I came today and I heard Nina had fallen ill and so her part was given to me. Though I do really feel bad for Nina you know how much I simply love her part so I was happy that I got the opportunity to recite it.'
I know Madison really did feel bad for this girl called Nina. She wasn't the sort who gained pleasure in other's misfortune. But that was not the primary issue right now. ELI MOON WAS!
He was capable of executing the figments of his thoughts in full scale and missing out the lunch date was never a wise decision, no it f—king wasn't!
I remembered it like it was an event from today morning but it happened long back but something my mind will never let go for it was the ringing bells of remembrance. Never disappoint Eli Moon.
Michelle, that was her name, a transfer student from America. Though she was new we became fast friends but then Eli's shadow of darkness loomed over the new born light of darkness crushing it with its colossal feet which possessed pure evil one that surpasses even the boundaries of hell. He had called me over for dinner and I had agreed with no other option but then Michelle came along. She needed serious help in the mathematics, which was going to be held the next day. Feeling that I could surely do something beneficial for my friend I had given Eli a sincere call feeling extremely sorry for not being able to attend due to other obligations. I hadn't told Eli the reason to my declination but he knew, the devil always seems to lurk inside a person's depths, fiddle around with his mind and body like it were only a chew toy.
'Oh My God!' I screamed, I remember seeing Michelle's badly bruised body. The doctors said that it was surely a miracle why she was still inhaling and exhaling breaths. They said some hoodlums beat her up with basketball bats and that both her arms and legs were broken and so were some of her ribs. Eli-I-I never thought he would do this. So as I exited the hospital and was walking down the pavement trapped in my own simultaneous misery. I jerked out of it as a hand got me tightly by the wrist. I shrieked a bit and turned around to see Eli smiling an insane smile.
'Sakura I will always be your first priority is that understood nor else next time they will end up in the spoils of the earth get that.' With it he gave me a small peck in the lips and left. Michelle's parents went back to their home fearing the event with their daughter would reoccur itself. Michelle found out background on her abusers, though she never went to court, she never talked to me ever again. To her I was like the spirit who seemed to pester the living trying to obtain access to their worlds once more.
'I can't stay.' I couldn't arrange the words in the delicate manner I so desired, they came out though my inner strength had tried to restrain them.
Everyone's face became a cascade of raw astonishment especially Madison, 'What do you mean you can't stay?'
'I can't Madison I have to go out with Eli.' I tried my hardest to control my voice but malice's invisible hands were now tampering my insides and I could not free myself from it. I could feel the formation of tears in my eyes. No one ever means to hurt a friend but yet we do.
'But Sakura it'll only take some minutes for the song isn't that lengthy besides you can always call Eli and say you'll run a little late.' Madison presented an acceptable solution but there was nothing as a solution when Eli's deceased mind was concerned. I looked at Nikki who looked a bit confused that I was leaving departing in the middle of my friend's special moment for a date, and a sense of desperation swept over me like I was being carried away by a tide to the desolation of an open sea. My head constructed an horrific image, Nikki being thrashed by the unmerciful weights of those basketball bats and soon she releases her last breath and her body breaks leaving only a empty shell for the entity inside drifts away. Michelle had a natural strength that seemed to push her to the limit but Nikki unfortunately did not posses this attribute making my fears intensify by each passing second.
'I can't I'm sorry.' Oh yes I truly was. I was sorry I ever met the bastard nor else this day would be nothing more than a nightmare, which could be easily forgotten. My friends tried to be pursue me to change my mind but I hell did not stir and that is when I lost a friend.
'STOP IT!' Madison screamed, everyone who had been persuasive with me including myself turned around to see a tearful, hurt and angered Madison Daidouji, I have never seen her applying this state before, never, 'GO SAKURA! GO TO YOUR DATE! BESIDES I RATHER DIE TO SEE THE LIKES OF YOU EVER AGAIN!'
Frozen. I didn't hear right? Right? Madison did not say that. Khushi looked shocked to the amount I carried but the others, they seemed to have gotten Madison's reaction.
'Madison—' Khushi protested in utter despair, she had not been persuasive to that extent as the others for she knew Eli's volatile personality.
'Don't say anything Khushi!' Madison yelled, 'You know you think you know a person but you know people wear a mask to cover their naked faces but its only a matter of time you see their true colors.'
Madison was leaving but I got a hand over her shoulder. I had to explain! But Madison caught my hand in rough swish and freed herself from my touch as if I carried contagions from a severe illness, 'GO AWAY SAKURA! I-I HATE YOU OKAY! I HATE YOU!' with that she left crying.
All of my friends seemed to have tasted the bitterness of anger and betrayal. They looked extremely hurt and I felt solely responsible. Khushi stood at the back the only one who had an understanding aura emitting. We stood there in ringing silence the only sounds were the echoing applause of an audience appreciating the voice of another. But the silence spoke words, words, which were so malevolent it was best, kept in this nature.
'Sakura,' Chelsea was the one who broke the power of the silence, 'How…How could you?'
It was too much too bare. I felt my legs in motion like an involuntary command that I had not ordered to do but still I wanted to escape the auditorium and people stared seeing my melancholy figure barging itself outside. The words still yelled and tore up my mind- I HATE YOU!
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Walking. For how long? The calculator in my head was entrapped in some numbness so I wasn't sure nor did I care. I felt this stinging pain in my heart as though a thousand daggers were plummeting through it with a purpose to tear it apart. But it felt it was already torn and now it was gripping the fine edge of existence trying to keep itself from perishing from the world. I felt more tears pierce its way down my emerald orbs, Madison; she never wanted to see me anymore, my childhood friend had declared she hated me and had every right to do so. I was leaving at her moment of glory to attend a lunch date, who had ever heard of this lunacy?
I felt myself slipping, I wanted to stay but I was sinking further into the pool of sorrow. Cold greeted me as I looked down I saw inviting darkness. I closed my eyes and graciously accepted its proposal to stay with it forever, knowing still the hazards of the decision I made. I was drowning in its seductive arms when someone in the current state of mind dragged me out of its sadistic grip. I opened my eyes to see my face only inches above the cement and saw arms around my waist. Slowly they got me out of the waters of subconscious and brought me back to the world of reality and looked at mirroring emerald orbs.
'Brian.'
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'Sakura, are you ok? What's the matter?' he looked at me with concern and complete sincerity. I looked away and let out frustrated breaths. I liked him a lot; he was dear and was all right to be around. To bad Eli had commanded me to keep my distance from this young boy. Oh yeah he did tell me, his fists were speaking the language of dominance very well.
'Sakura,' he urged on, he removed some strands of hair from my face in the gentle manner, 'Sakura why are you crying?'
I looked away only to feel a gentle hand caressing my face in such a gentle way it was frightening! I looked perplexed at Brian. His emerald eyes, which twined mine, softened up a created a certain understanding that I've seen Li give me on that night. Li, my sweet friend, how I long for you so at this moment. To have your arms wrapped around me and not this young man's. Wait a minute, I just said I longed for him and did strange new sensation is building in my heart…
'Sakura, I know.' It was almost a dying whisper but its eeriness got my attention quite well, 'I know you can't be my friend for I'm part of Eli's rival gang but I want too…so…so much.'
There was some sort of feeling vibrating along with his words that made me extremely uncomfortable I slipped out of his warm embrace for there seemed to be a chilly atmosphere building up, 'Thanks Brian, I really appreciate your help but I'm fine.'
I was moving along when he stopped me yet again with his unusual eeriness once more, 'I know Eli is crazy about you but I don't feel like it's a mutual reaction. It seems your bound to him.'
I was not in any mood to talk about my love life, heck, I wasn't sure I had one, a life full of slavery, yes that was a good rephrasing. Yes, it was so obvious too some individuals that I was a bird in a gilded cage while to others this fact was visible as the blowing wind.
'But I care about you Sakura,' Brian continued, 'If you ever leave Eli then give me a ring.'
He walked away and there was a great deal of emphasis on the word ever. I gasped at the thought, will I ever leave Eli? I had no desire to marry him or have his children but yet the road this so called relationship was leading the topic was an inevitable one. I found remorse resurfacing from my depths once more and the abandonment of Madison loomed over to create more sadness in my soul. How can I live life without the people dear to me? The way things were going I prayed life will be short so I can end this perpetual misery and go up that other dimension and ask God why were there so many misfortunes in life when the victim seemed to possess no guilt. Unconsciously, trying to make better of the melancholy, I started singing a song, a song in my head constructed so suddenly that it was scary but as I sang it I realized I was graphing my life in melodious tunes:
'Falling is not an option,
When the heart is broken
But it gives me some salvation
From the pain that will remain unspoken.
I try to realize,
But I can't compromise.
For this pain which is growing by each passing second.
I wish,
That I could die,
Hell's a luxury
Compared to all of this.
I don't understand,
The strings of faith,
Which seems to manipulate
The very essence of my soul.
I wish,
That I could fall,
Into the wall of regret.
Anything to ease the pain
Which has resided in my core!
Falling, is not really an option
For the broken heart has no choice
When it's veiled by the pain that will remain unspoken.
When u fall,
Into that abyss,
Your emotions will be in change
And you'll never be the same!
Falling is not an option
Really not an option,
When the pain takes place in your heart.
You're in shame,
Who's to blame?
The secrets in your soul unfold
Which were never meant to be told.
Falling,
Someone help me.
Falling,
Take me out of this abyss.
Falling,
Won't you get me out and spare my heart.
Falling,
Its better to die.
Falling,
Then to live in a lie.
Falling,
Then to face reality,
Don't wanna fade in a fantasy.
So, now I tell you again,
Falling is not an option,
When the heart is broken
But it gives me some salvation
From the pain that will remain…unspoken.'
I finished singing the song and started drifting again to the recesses to thought. I had been thinking but then a hand grabbed my wrist hard. I gave a yelp from the pain and turned around to see a raged Eli, 'Where the f—k have you been?! And what the hell where you doing with Brian?! Didn't I tell you not to see him again! How dare you disobey me?!'
'Please leave me alone Eli.' I had no strength to pander to Eli; I released myself from that violent grip and strode onwards until the circulation of my wrist ceased again. Eli.
'Where the hell are you going?! I asked you a question! You will listen to me!'
That was it! That was the last straw! There was a barrier a limitation in the human body one can endure anything but there was a word called enough and I had had enough! I forgot about everything my friends, my family and now I centered myself as the prime importance, 'ELI I HAD ENOUGH OK! I AM NOT YOUR WORTHLESS S—T! I AM A PERSON! I DON'T LOVE YOU ELI NOR DO I CARE! THIS IS OVER! WE ARE THROUGH! GO F—K YOURSELF!'
I strode along and I felt free after a long time but this new sense of freedom was short lived when Eli grabbed me and spun me around, 'You can't leave me Sakura!' there was anger but it was blended with some sort of desperation, 'You belong to me!'
With that he punched my face hard that I thought my flesh will soak right in my skull and then it happened my head hit a protruding pipe in a nearby wall. A shower of blood emerged from my head and I saw fall down like rivulets along my face, a droplet fell slightly on my eye and I thought I was suffering from cataract. My mind became a fog, a mist that led to the underworld. I clasped my wound region and I stuttered as I walked. Everything became hazy like some dream I was trapped in. Blood poured endless like it were a waterfall and I grabbled the wall for support. I looked at Eli, he was shocked beyond reality and came running towards me. I had a feeling he had not intended this to happen.
'Sakura!'
He wrapped his arms around me but I was still conscious so I removed the filth from my body and I started walking on and the throbbing pain did not waver one bit. My focus was slowly diminishing and I found myself falling as I walked. A pool of blood was painting the pavement but I carried on. I was not going to die in front of Eli Moon. My body was drifting away in the darkness of destruction. Though I did my best to flee I could not for the force to let go, to end it all, was too tempting and it allured me in its web. My life flashed before my eyes, I really wish I could have achieved the things that I'd wished but it was now going to be unfulfilled desires. My mind was becoming blank; the normal-est of functions escaped me as I slumped to the ground in defeat to death. I felt I was falling; no one to help me, and that is when I heard it. A voice I yearned for so long. Li!
'Sakura! Hang on! Hang On! I'll help you! I'll Save You! I Promise.'
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Author's Note: Okay that was the sixth chapter and don't worry this is not the end of the story so I hope you liked it! I'm sorry for the late update but I was kinda busy. Oh yeah the song that Sakura sang I wrote it, it's called "Falling". I know its no biggie but I thought it sounded ok I guess. Anyways I'll try to update soon!
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