The Hardest Thing To Do

Alexis laid on the bed with her hands on her stomach, or what was left of her stomach. She was gradually wasting away and she could care less.

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"Lexi," Laura said from the door.

"What?" Alexis asked.

"I have something for you," Laura said. "I'm gonna slip it under the door."

Alexis was curious so she made her way over to the door.

When she got there she picked up the unfamiliar object.

"What is it?" Alexis asked.

"Chocolate, now eat it," Laura instructed. "It'll give you energy."

Alexis was going to say something but didn't. Instead she did as she was told and took a bite. It was delicious. At least more delicious than dry toast. She finished the bar and gave the wrapper back to Laura. Gratitude would have been expressed but Alexis was too tired so she just went back to sleep.

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The next morning Alexis woke up to screams. Numerous screams. All Sarah's. Then she heard someone slamming something. Her immediate decision? Jerry had gotten angry and was throwing things around again. He did it a lot lately and Alexis had gotten used to it. He never bothered her so she could care less.

Then the door knob began to shake. Alexis was going to sit up but there was no use and no energy to do so.

She was stunned when the door shattered. She looked and thought that she was just having another dream because AJ was walking towards her.

"Lexi baby," AJ said kneeling down beside her.

He stroked her arm.

That had never happened in her dreams. Was he actually there?

Alexis lifted her hand and felt his cheek. He held her hand and then kissed it.

"It's alright Lexi," AJ said kissing her cheek. "I'm here for you now."

Alexis tried to cry but nothing came out. AJ wiped the tears that were on his cheek and was shocked when he looked at midsection.

"How much weight have you lost?" He asked.

Alexis shrugged.

"Are they starving you?" AJ asked her.

Alexis wasn't even listening to the questions. He was there and that was all that mattered. She slowly sat herself up and wrapped her arms around him.

"What happened to you hair?" AJ asked.

That question started the waterworks. Alexis felt her head.

"Oh baby," AJ said wrapping his arms around her. "I could care less."

"Get out of my goddamned house!" Jerry yelled from the doorway.

AJ quickly stood up and looked at Jerry. His gazed then went back to Alexis. Alexis could see his heart break as he spoke.

"I'll make you a deal," AJ said looking down at Alexis. He took her hand in his and looked at Jerry. "If you agree to put her back in school, feed her properly, let her grow her hair out and see daylight I will leave her alone and never speak to her again."

"What a load of bullshit," Jerry said laughing. "You actually think that I'm going to believe that?"

"I've crossed you before Jerry," AJ said. "I think I've learned my lesson."

"You're not that type of person," Jerry said. "What are you getting out of this?"

"The satisfaction of knowing that she's alright," AJ replied. "That's all that I need."

"And you'll leave her alone forever?" Jerry asked.

AJ looked down at Alexis who was looking at him in shock. He choked back tears, looked at Jerry and nodded.

"Forever," AJ said closing his eyes. He felt Alexis' hand slip out of his.

"But before we can make this official Alexis has to agree that she won't try to run away," Jerry stated.

AJ looked at Alexis again. It broke his heart to look at her and know that she was in pain. He knelt down in front of her caressed her arms.

"You have to do this," AJ said to her. "We can't be together. It wasn't meant to happen."

"Yes it was," Alexis said to him. "How can you even believe the stuff that is coming out of your mouth? If it wasn't meant to happen then we would've got caught a lot sooner. If it wasn't meant to happen you wouldn't have fallen in love with me and I you. If it wasn't supposed to happen-"

"I know Lexi!" AJ said firmly grabbing her hands. "I know."

AJ looked at Alexis and saw her heart shatter into hundreds of thousands of pieces. Alexis pulled her hands out of his and gave him a look. It was the same look that you would give a complete stranger on the street.

Alexis looked at Jerry. "It's a deal." Then she looked at AJ who looked as if he just lost the best thing in the world. "Get out."

Jerry kept his place in the room as if he enjoyed the performance. AJ got back up to his feet, walked to the door, and then looked back at Alexis.

"I still love you with all my heart Lexi," AJ said to her. "But it's killing me and it's killing you."

Alexis didn't reply. Instead she stared at him blankly. She waited until he left and then she began to cry again.

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