The Imperial Officer's Guide to Success (and Staying Alive)
I don't own Star Wars, ect., ad nauseum. Don't sue me--I don't have any money that I don't have to pay back in four years! Thank you very much to anyone who reads and special thanks to reviewers. I'm sorry it's been so long and I hope you will still read and review. I've been really busy with exams right now andbereft of ideas.Let me know what you think--Ldihawk.
Chapter 13: Imperial Life and Family
If you are one of the unattached officers, consider yourself fortunate! If you have a family back home my first suggestion is to make sure they are located in a safe area far away from the fighting preferably somewhere remote so they won't be targeted in the event that you make a large enough mistake. They will want to ask you about your job and there are times when you may feel the urge to share details with them. This is unacceptable for two reasons: 1. Sharing Imperial Secrets is a violation of Security Protocols and punishable by death and 2. Imperial transmissions and holos are monitored. I recommend keeping your transmissions short and to the point. Remember to choose your words wisely. Take a look at this deceptively simple letter from a young ensign.
Dearest Mother,
I have recently been promoted and am working on the bridge of a Star Destroyer. I am so fortunate to serve our glorious Empire. The Rebels are on the run and I feel that I am part of something truly important. How are Father and my little brother, Steven? I trust you are enjoying the pleasant weather at home. There is nothing at all out of the ordinary to report and I am well. I received your transmission last week and was excited to learn that Steven is thinking of joining the Empire! Two officers in one family—imagine! I look forward as always to your next message.
Your devoted son,
John
The ensign is using an elementary code to communicate a message to his family. I suggest you develop your own code to convey any messages that might otherwise place you in danger. What the ensign's message actually says is this:
Dearest Mother,
I have recently been promoted and am working on the Bridge of a Star Destroyer. I am fortunate to be alive as I received my promotion when my superior died suddenly. How will I survive under Lord Vader's Command? Help me! Please, if there is anything you can do to get me off this ship let me know! My junior officer keeps suggesting that I should inspect the airlock and I havea sinking feeling he may be trying to kill me. I have to get out of here at all costs!
I hope that this letter won't be my last,
John
If you are thinking of starting a family of your own—Don't. Family tends to complicate matters. If you already have a family, I'm sure your sons will make fine servants of the empire. Having a family poses many many problems. For example, what do you do if you're son confesses to you that he's a rebel sympathizer? First, make sure he is locked up preferably in a basement or closet where he cannot be seen. Then, dismiss it to neighbors and coworkers as a phase or post-adolescent rebellion. If the case is severe enough, consider sending him to live with relatives on a distant planet. What if your teenage daughter decides to date a rebel? I suggest taking the young man out for a drink and discussing things in a civilized manner with a nice long blaster between the two of you. You can turn him in and make it appear that his capture was all part of your well-orchestrated plan. If you have to vaporize him, so much the better.