Author's note: a few people were extremely offended by my version of a Christmas Carol in txt spk. Oh well, it was one of my less successful attempts to be funny (I've deleted it from ffnet but you can still read it on my website - see the link on my profile). So this is to make amends, an actual proper Christmas Carol fanfic, in standard English and with no attempts at humour. Enjoy, I hope it makes you feel better!
Old Scrooge
There was a part of his brain he called 'Old Scrooge'. A part of his brain that was incredibly active today.
Perhaps I'm going mad, he grimly thought. Other people often thought such a thing of him... after all, how many people undergo an extreme personality change, for the better, on Christmas day of all days? Cratchit had certainly taken him for mad...
And on days like today, that Christmas Eve (or however long it was...) seemed awfully far away, and winter was coming, and he was cold and alone and the London wind ripped bitterly through his coat... At times like this, Old Scrooge definitely woke up.
Old Scrooge. It was the part of his brain that was still cruel, still bitter, still selfish. Ebenezer (as he called the other part of his brain) was most definitely not like that. Ebenezer was kind and generous. He was patient. Gentle.
He's weak, snapped Old Scrooge. Sentimental fool. Soft in the head.
Perhaps he was right. Money was tight these days... helping pay young Tim's doctor's fees hadn't helped. Oh the things that he did, and never got thanked for! And if he hadn't got so attached to that wretched boy (and his wretched family), money wouldn't be so tight. There was a time, too, when beggars never bothered him for alms. Now they all thought they could beg of him. Lazy, good-for-nothing... muttered Old Scrooge.
It had been a hard day. Tipsy Mr. Silder came in to ask for an extension on his loan. Wretched man, if it wasn't for his honest wife and five children, he would have never got away with it. Ebenezer's patience was tried. Old Scrooge scowled and said, I told you so.
And Bob Cratchit, being so consumed with worry for his young son, had been useless today. The clerk had made mistakes all day. He'd finally snapped and brusquely sent him home early. Cratchit responded with embarrassing gratitude, making him feel guilty because he just wanted the man to stop bothering him.
On days like this... oh, he'd seen an old foe. He'd been very rude to said foe in the past, and the man had given him a good dressing-down in front of everyone in the market-place. Should have let me handle it, leered Old Scrooge, and he couldn't help but think that Old Scrooge might have done a better job of it. The old foe was a fellow money-lender - a decent sort who had sent his respects when Marley died but spent the rest of his time fiercely criticising Scrooge & Marley, and that day had seen Scrooge after a long estrangement and given him a piece of his mind.
"You needn't think you fool me, Mr. Scrooge," he'd blasted. "I know this is all an act, an old man ingratiating himself just because he's lonely. You're a wolf in sheep's clothing."
He'd heard it before, but was still left speechless. He thought he ought to make amends with the man - apologise, somehow, convince him he was genuine. But the accusation shook him. He was lonely, and hardly a saint. And that Christmas Eve seemed like so long ago now. Sudden doubt attacked him - was he right? People were staring and no one said a thing. He'd simply turned curtly and walked away.
Old Scrooge loved this. You're useless, Ebenezer, he accused. Foolish, ineffectual, USELESS!
Now he stamped through the darkening streets, glowering at no one in particular.
"Uncle Scrooge!"
And then the miracle, then the ray of sunshine, then...
He broke into a smile. "Oh, hello Fred, where did you come from?"
His nephew embraced him fondly. "I was coming to see you. Would you care to dine with us tonight? Clara reminded me we haven't seen you for ages. Are you all right? You look terribly cold."
Ebenezer Scrooge nodded, gently. "Yes I'm all right. I would very much like to dine with you, Fred."
"Excellent," said his nephew jovially. "Well come along - I'll call a cab."
And on this matter, Old Scrooge fell to silence, perhaps refusing to acknowledge that there was good in the world after all.
Fin