Disclaimer: It all belongs to J.K. Rowling

Summary: These are basically a few missing moments from Half-Blood Prince. The reason I am doing this is because I am incredibly dissatisfied with most of the ones milling about there, featuring a completely obsessed Ginny. If anyone read the now famous interview J.K. shared with Mugglenet creator Emerson and Leaky Cauldron founder Melissa, they would have realized that she basically said that Ginny had to get over Harry for him to notice her. I have decided to keep up that notion in my own ficlet.

This is Ginny Weasley's journal, but I am not dating it, because no one reads the dates anyways. The entry numbers are random, because I am not going to even try and pretend that I entered all of them, I just wanted to insert the ones that I felt showed a change in her relationship with Harry or events that are particularly important to each other.

Author's Note: I state something in this story that is not true. I'll give a virtual hug to whoever guesses what it is. I'll give you a hint; it's between words 2587 and 2605. Good luck!

Now, on with the story

Entry #178

I got into my first ever fight with Harry today. Well, it wasn't really a fight, but we did argue quite a bit. I am still completely annoyed over the whole thing, so I suppose that even though we forgave each other, it isn't completely all right with me.

It's just the way he goes on and on about that damn book. His potions book, the one that someone has been writing in before him and he's been taking advice from. I mean, no good can come of that, and I would have thought that after Harry's experience with Malfoy he would have stopped trying to defend the damn thing, but he still thinks that the book is harmless.

I know I can be biased based on what happened to me four years ago, but still, Hermione thinks it's a bad idea and she was never possessed by a book before. Of course, Harry was getting a better grade than her in potions because of said book, but none the less, it just seems rather shifty to me.

When I first heard about the book, I panicked. I heard Harry talking about it with Ron and Hermione and before I could stop myself I was reprimanding him for using it, He tried to tell me that it was just a textbook that someone had written some notes in to go along with it, but I was doubtful. When I finally saw the book though, I did give in. I looked through some of it, and Harry was right, it did seem harmless enough. Most of it was just "add two extra stirs" or "smash the beetles with the back of the spoon to make a smoother paste" or stuff like that. It was completely impersonal, and truthfully, just seemed like notes that most people would make in their potions book. But then I found out that "the prince," as Ron and Harry affectionately call the author, had actually written spells down in the book. They weren't dark spells, or so I thought at the time, but this seemed really weird to me. And they certainly weren't friendly spells either. They weren't spells that made your teeth nice and white or spells that let you tell really good jokes for a day or anything. Oh no, these were rather nasty spells. One of the spells causes people's tongues to stick to the roofs of their mouths; one caused people's toenails to grow at alarming rates. Another one caused people hear a buzzing in their ears if they were trying to listen in on the conversation of the spell caster. And sadly enough, one caused people to hang upside down by their ankles. None of these spells were by any means deadly, but I wasn't exactly thrilled with them either. And the fact that Harry just talked it up like it was some big joke, well I can't say that did anything to settle my nerves.

But then Ron got poisoned and Harry saved his life. And he said he wouldn't have known what to do if it wasn't for the Prince. So I forgave Harry and I stopped thinking about the book. I mean at the time, I thought that maybe the spells weren't SO terrible, and clearly the Prince wasn't so evil, or Ron would've died.

So for a couple of months, Harry excelled in potions and I just thought it was merely because of luck that he had found such a book, and that he had talent in him that Snape had tried his absolute hardest to repress.

Then came 'sectumsempra' and the events that sprung from such a spell. Malfoy could have died if Moaning Myrtle hadn't warned the entire castle that someone was dying in a bathroom. Harry stopped using the book, and I thought maybe he had seen that it just wasn't worth the risk.

But no! He's still defending that book as if it were the greatest thing since sliced bread. And that's really how our fight began.

"Harry," I had said to him, looking at his sad little figure slumped in the couch, "what's wrong?"

"Nothing Gin," he told me, "I'm just not doing so well in potions, and I can't get the book back."

"Look," I tried to start while sitting down next to him, "maybe you should just forget about the book. That book is the cause of a lot of terrible things, and it just isn't worth suffering for."

But then Harry interrupts me saying, "That book saved your brother's life Gin, and I do not think that the one spell is worth throwing the whole book away for. Besides it's not like the book told me to do it or anything, it just had it written there. He might have even written it down so that he could come up with a countercurse or something."

For some reason this got me really angry. Maybe it was just how he had said "the book told me to do it." I know that Harry didn't mean anything by it, and he wasn't thinking at all about the chamber when he said it, but I couldn't help but feel like he had been taking a slight at me. Though the reasonable part of me told me that Harry would never do anything like that, and had never thought that I had been ridiculous in taking orders from the diary in the first place, but the very small part of me that is always on guard about things like the Chamber, told me that Harry thought I was a foolish little girl, and unfortunately that was the part that took over.

"Harry," I screamed, "do you think I could help it when I was taking orders from Riddle's diary? Do you think I could control what was happening to me? Do you think I liked it? That I wanted to be possessed and controlled and used like a puppet? And that I wanted a book to be the one controlling me? NO! Just because you never felt what it was like to be completely controlled by something or someone else that wasn't you doesn't give you the right to make fun of me!"

Harry looked so shocked and taken aback when I had said all of this that I almost cried. He looked like I had slapped him across the face. Finally he regained his composure enough to tell me, in an oddly calming voice, that he was sorry.

"Gin, look at me. Ginny, c'mon. I am sorry about what I said. I wasn't even thinking about Riddle's diary or Voldemort when I said that. I didn't mean to upset you. You know I don't blame you for what happened back in your first year, or that I think you meant to take orders from the diary. I know it hurts you even now. And believe it or not, I do know what it's like to be controlled by something that is not you."

Finally, I was so amazed that I looked back at him, and even then I could barely speak. It took me what felt like many moons before I could even form words again. "What do you mean; you know what its like to be controlled?"

He looked me in the eyes this time, and I saw so much into them that I thought I could see his soul. I felt like I saw all the pain, all the burden, all the loss, I felt like I saw everything that he had been through. "Ginny, I don't know if you know exactly how my scar connects me to Voldemort. Hell, I don't know exactly how my scar connects me to Voldemort. But whenever Voldemort gets near me, I can sense it; I can feel him because my scar starts to burn."

I only nodded, because it hurt to listen to all of this, and I had known this much already.

"Well, before Voldemort got his body back, that was as much of Voldemort I could feel. Only pain, and only when he is beside me. But then he got his body back. Not the one he has now, but a corporeal form at least. And I could see him in my dreams. They weren't as clear as the dreams I had after he was fully returned, but they were something. As Voldemort grew stronger so did my connection to him. When he got his body back, I could go so far into his mind that when I slept I was within him. Where he moved I moved. When he looked into a mirror, I saw myself in his eyes, peering out. The first time that happened was one of the single most terrifying things to ever happen to me in my life. But you have known some of this. You knew that I saw the snake when your dad was attacked, however, I didn't just see the snake Ginny, I was the snake. Because Voldemort possessed the snake I could retreat within the snake as well. I smelt what it smelt; I felt its urge to hunt just as Voldemort did.

"But my connection does not stop there. I could sense Voldemort's feelings. Whenever he was sad, happy, angry, annoyed, bemused, or anything else, I could feel him. Wherever the hell he was, wherever he was, I could feel what he felt. Voldemort used this connection to his advantage. He gave me the dream about Sirius being tortured in the department of mysteries so I would go in after him. The only reason that I can't sense any of this now is because Voldemort is practicing occlumency, or blocking off his mind, from me. I could sense what he wanted before he did, and I had unlimited access to his mind. He finally realized that this was a huge risk to him, and he blocked me out. But for one year, whether I wanted to or not, I would feel annoyed because he was feeling annoyed, I would feel angry because he was feeling angry, and I knew because he knew. So even though I have not had the same experience as you Ginny, I have at least a slight idea as to what you went through, and how terrible it must've been. I'm so sorry Ginny, and I won't mention the book to you again, if it really upsets you so much."

I am not exactly sure what happened in the next few seconds, I just found myself wrapped in Harry's arms, hugging him so hard I thought I might burst. He had been through so much, more than I ever had, and I just wanted to tell him that I was sorry and I couldn't believe I had been so rude, but I couldn't even open my mouth because I would've started crying.

Finally, I managed to ask him if he was upset with me, and he told me that he liked me far too much to be upset with me, and that it was his fault anyways. I don't necessarily know if it was his fault, but I was so excited by the first part that I just couldn't stop smiling. Finally after what felt like ages, he let me go, kissed me good night, and walked me to the foot of the stairs.

It wasn't exactly the ideal way to spend the evening, and I can certainly say that the potions book of his drives me nuts, but at least I am dating the sweetest person on the planet. I have never had such a good apology in my life.

Entry #179

Today started out tense, went straight to wonderful, came crashing down to aggravating, and then finally made a solid stop at joyful. So my emotions have gotten quite the workout today, which I find far from amusing.

The day started out tense, as I have previously said. I was so worried that Harry was going to be annoyed with what I had said last night that I could barely get dressed. I guess I really must've fallen hard for Harry, because I never seemed to care when Dean and I had fights that were far worse than the one that Harry and I had. Finally I managed to get my pants on the right way and went downstairs into the common room. Most people had already head down to breakfast so the only people still there were a couple seventh years, some first year girls and a fourth year. Harry had decided not to wait for me, which wasn't completely surprising because I usually sleep in on Saturdays and no one knows, including me, when I am going to wake up, but it did not do a thing to settle my nerves either. Finally, after what felt like ages, I managed to find my way to the Great hall and to my delight saw that there was an empty seat next to Harry. Ron and Hermione weren't there, so I assumed that they had already finished.

"Hi," I said to Harry walking up to him, "can I sit there?"

"Course you can Gin. This seat is always free for you, you know that."

I sat down and considered grabbing some toast but decided to just grab the bull by the horns and ask Harry how he felt about last night. He put his toast down, rather slowly I thought, and turned to me. "Ginny, all couples fight. Last night just proved that we are not exception. I am not going to say that I enjoyed last night, or that I thought it was fun, or that I agree with you, but I am not upset with you in anyway. You are allowed to have your own opinion, and after everything that's happened to you, I can't say that your take on the book surprises me."

I was shocked, truly shocked. Harry had clearly practiced what he was going to say, but I guess he just knows me so well that he had known what I was going to ask, and it was sweet none the less. "Really?" I asked, sitting closer, "we're okay?"

"Yeah Gin," he said putting is arm around my waist which made me happier than words could possibly describe, "We're okay. Also, did you know that you are adorable when you are annoyed with me?"

He said that with one of his trademark little grins and I found myself laughing so hard that I could barely breathe. Only Harry would find it adorable that a fiery tempered red head was annoyed with him.

Actually the rest of the morning went rather well. Harry and I walked around the lake and it was just wonderful. It was as good as it had ever been before, except this time I knew that Harry wouldn't break up with me over a small fight. He thinks more of me than that. At lunch we managed to meet up with Ron and Hermione. Apparently, Ron still can't manage to get some charm right, so he and Hermione have been studying in the library almost constantly. Of course the look on Harry's face makes me think they are doing more than that, although what I could not imagine. When I asked him if they were snogging up there, he laughed and told me that I wasn't quite right, but if they didn't start soon their heads are probably going to explode. I am glad that at least Harry thinks this also.

Anyways, that afternoon started to go downhill when Dean managed to corner me in the common room. He seemed to have known that Harry had detention with Snape that afternoon (STILL!) and waited until he had left. He came up to me and told me that I shouldn't have to put up with crap like that from Potter. When I asked what he meant by that, he told me that he didn't think I should have to put up with someone who makes fun of me for what I went through in my first year. I told him that Harry has never made fun of me for anything that happened that year except once asking me why I thought of fresh pickled toads when I looked at his eyes.

Dean actually seemed rather surprised at this piece of information. "What?" He asked me. "Then why were you yelling at him last night for teasing you?"

"I wasn't and Harry wasn't making fun of me. It really wasn't about Riddle's diary at all, it was about another book."

"Huh, because I seem to recall you telling him that he had no idea what it was like having been controlled by something like that."

"Yeah well, it wasn't how it sounded I guess and WAIT HAVE YOU BEEN SPYING ON ME?"

"I wasn't spying on you. I was using an extendable ear to listen to er, something else, in the common room and I just happened to hear you and Harry."

"But Harry and I were the only people in the common room last night at that point."

"yeah well, er…"

"How much did you hear?" I was really freaking out at this point. What Harry had told me about his scar last night was incredibly personal. I am sure Dumbledore knows, and I bet Ron and Hermione do too, but I think that I am the only other person who knows anything of the sort. I don't even know if Voldemort knows that much about Harry's connection to him, and while I don't see Dean as a death eater or anything, that sort of information could be tortured out of him, or a truth potion could be used, or he could just use it to blackmail Harry.

"I couldn't hear anything after you asked Harry what he meant by knowing how it felt to be controlled. Hermione's damn cat came up to me and swiped the extendable ear out of my hand. When I finally managed to get it back from him, the cat had torn it so bad I couldn't hear anything but a weird buzzing noise."

The brief amount of relief I had felt was washed away with a new emotion, indignation.

"Wait," I said slowly, "extendable ear? As in a Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes extendable ear? As in you were using my brother's products to spy on me?"

Dean actually looked sheepish for once, "I didn't think that… I mean, I was just… If you were… I was only looking out for you for your own protection Ginny!"

I slapped Dean and walked into my dorm. Hermione was still helping Ron about his "charms homework" and Harry was in his detention with Snape. I wasn't sure if I was relieved or annoyed by this. If I told Ron, he would probably beat up Dean. If I told Harry, he would probably beat up Dean. I decided I should talk to Hermione, but there had to be someone other than her who could help me keep extendables from Dean's hands. That's when I realized I should just go directly to the source. I posted a copy of my letter here…

Dear Fred and George,

How are things going? I haven't seen you two since Ron was poisoned, and have only gotten two letters since then, but I assume things are going well, because your products are all over Hogwarts. Mum says that you two are still putting up obnoxious signs on your front window, which she hates and I love, so I think you two should keep it up.

I assume that you have made fun of Bill every time you have seen him, and I hope that the combined efforts of the two of you could make him see right about Fleur. It's unfortunate that Tonks is so head over heels for Lupin, otherwise she might start liking Bill, and she is a much more suitable choice for him.

Everyone here is doing fine. Hermione is working diligently of course, but that's only to be expected. Ron is just Ron, so I guess that's good as well. Neither of them will tell the other that they like them yet, I suppose for fear of rejection. I think that a good snog would do them both years of good. Harry and I are actually considering putting bets on the date that they are going to get together. We might even make a pool that the whole of Gryffindor house can get in on. If you want to place a bet just write me back telling me what day you two want. It'll cost 5 sickles for each of you to jump in.

I suppose I should get down to business though and tell you the reason that I am writing. I suppose you have heard from the aforementioned Ronald that I am no longer seeing a Mr. Dean Thomas. I suppose you two threw a small party and possibly even held a sale at your shop. While you may have decided that it is now okay to sell him products from your shop, I must say that I disagree. Dean has actually used some of these extendable ears to spy on conversations I have had with, others, in hopes that he might be able to use this information and get back together with me. Yesterday, Dean almost overheard some conversation that was shared between Harry and I that would have been detrimental to Harry for reasons that I shall not state in this letter but have much to do with the events that took place at the end of last year. My request to you, as younger sister to older brothers, is that you will not sell Dean Thomas anymore of your products, especially extendable ears or anything else that could be used to spy on me.

Much Love,

Ginny

Well, I hope that took care of everything, though knowing Fred and George, they will probably keep selling him the products anyways. Well, I felt so glad at knowing that Dean would be unable to buy products from my brothers, I spent the rest of the evening in a rather giddy state. I had borrowed Hedwig to send the letter, and when Harry told me he would walk me to the owlrey, we actually managed to stop off on our way back and enjoy a rather lovely snog. I must say that though today was a complete fiasco, it did have its moments. I suppose I should talk to Harry about setting up that betting pool though.

Thanks for reading my fic, and reviews, while not necessary, are greatly appreciated. I cannot express how nice it feels to see the fanfic bot telling me I have a review in my inbox, and it does encourage me to write more. I have completed chapter 10, and I can honestly see several more coming soon, and reviews remind me to keep writing and that my work is being appreciated. Thanks to those who have reviewed, it really does help me write better.

Friends don't let friends read fics and not review.

fireboltf2: Thanks for the review! Yes, terriers are extremely randy dogs.

The Female Nerd: I like your new name. I think that this is one you should definitely try and stick with. Thanks for the review.

Queenlover: I know exactly how I am going to handle the dumping bit, so fear not; it is something that has been stewing inside my head since I started this story. Thanks for reading.

BexyLou: I have a strong suspicion that Harry and Ginny will end up together in book 7. Harry needs love to continue on, doesn't he? There weren't many Harry/Ginny moments in HBP, hence my continuation here. Thanks for the review.

Chaos023: Thanks for the review. I also enjoy the broom closet scene. Oh the possibilities.

anira22: Thanks for the review, I was going for something without too much fluff, and I hope others think the same things you do.

xXxSilverWolfxXx: No I haven't read that fic, but I suppose I should check it out. Thanks for reading and thanks for adding me to your c2!

PattyWeasley1990: Thanks for the review. Wow, I am truly honored. Thank you so much.