A/N: Sorry it took so long to post but I got written into a corner. LOL but I think I figured it out. Thank you for all the wonderful feedback. This next part will start in Janet's POV. Enjoy

Part 19

They always warn you in medical school that you should emotionally detach yourself from your patients.
It keeps you focused on what you need to do, without any distraction.

During my time at the SGC, I've failed to do this time and time again.
They are more than patients to me, they are family.

Each year it gets more difficult not to care. But I will not let it show.
I will never voice what I feel.

That sometimes I really hate my job.

I had tried, in the beginning, to be the detached doctor they wanted me to be, but the longer I'd worked there and the more had gotten to know each and every person that stepped through the infirmary doors, I could not just fix them up and show them the door. Not without caring about them.

It is something that I have learned to accept. Something I cannot change. We work in a stressful environment, one that binds us together. We all share a mission we need to accomplish for the good of our planet.

Here we only have each other.

I know their names, I know their families. I have let them into my heart.

Especially SG1.

They are my adopted brothers and sister, uncles and aunt to my daughter Cassie.

They are special, all in different ways and I feel I have failed them.

I hide in my office, afraid to go to the commissary and face anyone.

The questions are always the same and I am not in the frame of mind to answer any of them.

I am drained. This is the first time in the last 12 hours I've had a chance to sit and I try not to cry.

Colonel Jack O'Neill has barely survived extensive trauma surgery, and Major Samantha Carter has just come out of the emergency neurosurgery that was necessary when it became so horribly clear that she was suffering from intracranial swelling.

I cover my face with my hands and lean onto my desk.

I can't break down, not now and not here.

They want a miracle and are expecting me to perform it.

I look down at my hands and they are shaking. I feel numb as I try to regain my composure. I can't hide here all night, even though I wish I could.

I grab for the cup of coffee that has grown cold, but I don't care, I need it to distract me from thinking. Thinking of all the things I've done wrong. Things I should have done things that might have made the difference between life and death.

God, there are times I really hate my job.

Hate the doubts that always creep into my mind, hate the internal voice that yells at me, saying I should have done more.

I try to shut it out, but it won't work. The doubts start to escalate and I review my actions in my mind, to determine if there was something different I could have done.

There is a knock on my door and I stay silent. I can't bear to see anyone now.

I won't open the door. Maybe they'll go away.

I hear the footsteps leaving and let out the breath I am holding.

Did I do everything in my power to save them?

I go over the scenario over an over again.

I cringe now at the way I treated Sam.

Oh, Sam, can you ever forgive me?

I remember her leading Teal'c and the Colonel through the gate, Daniel right behind them.

The Colonel was unconscious and before they yelled out to me, I was already up the ramp.

He was in bad shape. Worse then I had expected.

I went into doctor mode I started to evaluate him and knew I had to get him to the OR ASAP.

I had not yet even seen his back.

I remember holding back the words that wanted to spill out.

I feared in my heart that I would not be able to save him.

Sam was talking, but I wasn't listening, I was intent on stabilizing the Colonel.

I hadn't noticed her condition, or the fact that she had refused to let go his hand.

I checked his pulse then his heart. I panicked. I had found no heartbeat and shouted at Teal'c to put him down, that I had to start compressions.

I had told the dying Colonel not to give up. I look back now and think I did it for myself, to make me work harder to save his life.

I had to bring him back, he had been through so much and he was a huge part of every single person's life here.

I was trying to get my team to help, but she refused to move. The nurses tried to pull her away and she'd snapped.

I should have known then that she was not in her right mind.

She confessed aloud everything that she had hidden deep in her heart, only letting me hear before when we were alone in my house, after a bottle of wine. My heart aches now when I remember her words, how lost she looked and how she was so sure if she let go of his hand, he would leave her.

The tears are threatening to fall again.

I've never told anyone how much of a toll this takes on me.

I've seen them all battle back from great odds, hell, I've even seen them die and comeback, but still it is heart wrenching to go through this. But I do. I have to. I am needed to perform miracles and I when I can, I always pull them through. Yet I know better than most that not everyone gets a happy ending.

I need air. I feel the walls are falling in on me and I don't understand why I can't do more.

I get up, needing to get out now. I need to breathe; I need to scream out how unfair this is. I need to cry in peace, without interruption.

I open the door and find Daniel sitting on the floor next to my door.

He looks up at me and gestures, asking me to sit next to him.

He looks so lost. I'd told him to get some rest. He didn't follow my orders, of this I am sure. He's still wearing the same clothes, with his and Sam's blood on it.

I sit down on the floor and he's staring straight ahead.

I reach out for his hand and he takes it. He leans close and I pull his head onto my shoulder.

He squeezes my hand and starts to talk.

"You asked me earlier how I got hurt. Jack did it. He beat the crap out of me when I told him he was a selfish son of a bitch for never telling Sam how he felt about her. That she loved him regardless of what he did. I deserved it, Janet, and more, for saying what I did. I wanted him to hurt as much as I was. I wanted him to break. I just didn't realize that watching her die in front of him had destroyed him inside, had taken away his only remaining reason for living. He never said a thing, not even after she died, not until I was so awful to him. They never had a chance to show how much they loved one another and I simply made it worse. I didn't support him at all, he needed me and I couldn't see past my own pain. I deserved this, Janet. I really deserved this and more."

"Oh, Daniel," I whisper.

I hadn't asked him how he had sustained his injuries, but it made sense now. Why he had refused assistance, why he didn't want treatment for the cuts and contusions smattering his face. I need to inform the General of the situation. I'm not about to lose someone else.

"Why, Janet?"

I bite my lip that is the question I'm avoiding.

I take a deep breath. He needs me and I will be here for him.

"I don't know Daniel. I wish I had the answers, but I don't, I'm sorry. I know it doesn't seem fair after everything they've been through, that they end up like this."

His shoulders start to shake and I know he is crying. I pull him into my arms and he holds on to me tightly. I speak to him, in soft tones, telling him to let it out, that it will be okay, that I am here for him.

He had broken down earlier. He had been a witness to Sam's death at the hands of Anubis, the Colonel's injury by the gate, the destruction that was brought down upon the villagers and it was too much for him. Daniel always was an advocate for peace and hated violence. This day would be burned into his mind for a long time.

I've always had a special place in my affections for him. He would always wait by the sides of his injured team-members until they woke. They in turn did the same, he was their Danny and he was special to all of us.

I start to weep as well. I need to cleanse my soul of all the doubts, all the 'what if's. I start to voice what I should have done, what I could have done better and my worries that I haven't tried hard enough to save them.

Daniel pulls away from me and cups my face.

"No, you did everything but breathe for them, Janet. You always give your best, you don't know how not to. You should be proud of your efforts, not here casting doubts on your own abilities as a hell of doctor. No, Janet, you have nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to be sorry for."

I close my eyes. I had wanted to hear this from someone for so long and it coming from Daniel, now, is exactly what I need to put my demons to rest.

He pulls me into his arms again and I feel warm and safe.

A hand is suddenly on my shoulder and I glance up.

Teal'c is looking down at me.

I gasp.

"What's wrong, Teal'c?"

"You are needed in the infirmary, Dr. Fraiser. Your staff was trying to contact you and I came to locate you."

Daniel gets up and helps me stand. We run to the infirmary.

The nurses are in a panic.

Sam's pressure is extremely low and her vitals are fading.

I drop back into doctor mode, barking orders and asking for the things I need to get her blood pressure back up.

I look over to Daniel and Teal'c. I don't have the heart to tell them to leave, but they see my look and move to a corner of the room where they won't be in the way.

I check her pupils and they are dilated and unresponsive.

My mind is racing. Come on, Sam, what's wrong? Don't do this! I don't think your body can go through a round of surgery, at least not today. Live, Sam, please! You've been through too much trauma in the last day already.

The monitors stop their erratic beating and go back to a normal rhythm.

I pull up the bedrail and hold on to it. I look down at my best friend and take her hand.

She had been through so much and the way I had treated her…

I remember leaving the colonel in capable hands and getting back to the infirmary, to find out exactly what had happened on the planet.

I came in to see Sam walking toward the doors looking around.

I was at the end of my tether with her and let her have it.

I stopped my tirade when I saw the blood. I'd frightened her with my shouting; she backed up and knocked over a tray. She wasn't thinking straight and the guys grabbed her before she fell to the ground.

I started to check her over and glared at Daniel and Teal'c, asking them why they hadn't told me she was injured.

She was becoming less coherent and I deduced that she must have sustained a head injury. I saw all of the blood she had lost and finally saw the injury to her back. I really got to see her and wondered where the hell all the bruising on her had come from.

I wanted answers, but they had few.

She asked me if I was there to tell her if he was dead. I couldn't tell her something that I knew would break her heart. In honesty, I didn't know if the Colonel would pull through, but I had to make her fight to because I couldn't bear to lose them both.

I then, to my shame, told her a lie. I told her he had awoken, asking after her, asking if she was safe. She had looked relieved and I went on to tell her that she needed to let me tend to her. She agreed and Teal'c put her on the bed.

I started to get some history on her injuries and wished that none of this had happened to her.

In hindsight, Daniel was right; it wasn't fair that they went through these horrors, only to find themselves in this new peril.

Looking down at my now unconscious friend, I feel the two remaining members of SG1 standing to each side of me, each of them grasping one of my hands.

I need their strength, support and love. Daniel lets go of my hand and puts his arm around my shoulder. I lean in to him and tell them she is stable and that the next 48 hours are crucial. If the swelling doesn't decrease they will have to go back operate again.

I look to each of them and I can feel the burden they are carrying. Not wanting her to suffer anymore and not wanting to give up hope.

We are startled from our stupor by the doors opening up and someone small running straight to Daniel with 2 SF's hot on her tail.

I gaze at Daniel who has picked her up and is now carrying her.

"Daniel! Please tell them I can stay, I need to talk to her! You promised! I've got to thank her for bringing back my poppa. Please do not let them take me back."

She is in tears even before she turns to see Sam. She cries out and asks if her angel will survive.

I walk over to the SF's and tell them I will be responsible for her. That I will personally take her back to the rooms the villagers are occupying. They agree to this and leave us.

"Thanks, Janet, I couldn't send her away. She was the one that told me that Sam was alive and I was so overjoyed to find out that she was I promised Karina she would be able to talk to her angel."

She thinks Sam is her angel. It almost brings tears to my eyes, because it is so appropriate, not just in the case of this little girl. She had brought the joy of my life to me. My Cassandra was a godsend and it was all due to Sam that she was alive at all. She guarded us then, guards us to this day, like an angel, from the evil of the world. She defends her team and loves them like brothers. Well, all except one, and he is more then special to her.

Teal'c pulls a chair over to Sam's bed and Daniel sits with Karina in his lap. I walk over to the other side and she starts to ask more questions.

I listen and tell her why Sam has not woken up, why she has a large dressing on her head and why it is still bleeding. She asks if she will live and I smile, trying not to choke up and tell her that I honestly do not know.

She ponders my answer and says, "She needs to be kissed like in the story they were telling us earlier. The prince comes to save the princess and all he does is kiss her and she wakes."

She looks at Daniel, then at Teal'c and starts to glance around. She jumps off Daniel's lap and goes over the other bed, pointing at the still figure lying there.

"That's her prince. He should kiss her."

She gestures at the Colonel.

It's heartbreaking. The young girl doesn't know how close to the reality of the matter she is.

None of us can speak; we are almost struck dumb by the simple truth in the words of a child.

The machines that are hooked up to them let out a macabre symphony, keeping them here in the land of the living, perhaps even as their spirits fight to let go and be free.

He is a fighter. He would wake, if only he knew that Sam is in this much danger.

He had come out of surgery with a 50/50 chance of surviving. He had lost lots of blood, but wasn't as critical as Sam.

He was weakened by the stab wound and the other injuries he had acquired trying to get home. He had been fighting for his life. For hers, too. Yet he only lies on that bed, now, due to point blank shot he had sustained. I am sure of it. Were it not for that final hit, I know that he would have disregarded his own injuries that he would be by her side now, willing her to wake up.

I turn away and try to hide the tear that slips down my cheek.

It all seems so simple, through the eyes of a child.

To a child, love conquers all. To us adults, we who know the cold hard facts of life, it is never as simple as it seems.

The little girl takes his hand and starts to whisper to him.

"Colonel Jack, you've got to get up. She needs you. She's hurt and you are too, but you're the only one that can save her. You've got to get up and kiss her, so that she will awake from her slumber like the story says. I need to tell her thank you. She's my angel and I knew she would not let my poppa die. So hurry up and get better, so Major Sam will wake up and we can all live happily ever after."

She waits, thinking he will just open his eyes, rise from the bed and do her bidding.

I see that Daniel and Teal'c are fighting a losing battle. Teal'c is making an effort to remain his stoic self, but I can see his lip quiver. Daniel tries to stop the tears from falling, but fails. He wipes them away with the back of his hand.

Daniel walks over to her and crouches down to her level.

"Karina, Colonel Jack is hurt as well. He's just resting and should be up in no time. We've just got to wait. Come on, let's get you back to your parents, they're probably worried sick."

Karina shook her head.

"I told them that I will not leave till she wakes up. They understand we are thankful to all of you for saving us from the demons. I don't want to leave till they wake. Is that okay, Daniel, can I stay?"

Daniel turns to look at me, as does Karina.

"May I please stay? I promise not to get in the way and I'll sleep on the chair, so I wont take up any space. Please, Doctor Janet, let me stay."

I can't refuse her. I nod and she smiles. She turns back to the Colonel's bed and picks up his hand.

"I'm here, Colonel Jack, Doctor Janet let me stay, so hurry up and get better."

Daniel is about to speak to Karina when the klaxons sound.

Karina's eyes open as wide as saucers. She scrunches down and holds on to Jack's hand. She hears the announcement and is unsure what to do.

I motion to Daniel to reassure her she is safe and ask Teal'c to see who is coming through the gate.

He hesitates.

"Teal'c, go ahead, it might be the Tok'ra."

He leaves to see who has come through.

I watch as Karina climbs up into Daniel's lap again. She has not let go of the Colonel's hand. Daniel is whispering to her that she is safe and that only good people are allowed to come through the gate.

She listens and nods.

"I wish I was as brave as Major Sam. She was scared, but didn't let anyone know. She was sad when she didn't see any of you with us. I saw her tears, but didn't make a sound when they came to take her away, I tried to stop them, Daniel, but they hurt me and my mommy. Major Sam made them sorry and hurt them back, but there were too many of them. They took her away and I thought she was gone forever."

My blood starts to boil. Those monsters hurt this child? Given the history of my own daughter, the mistreatment of children never fails to hurt me as well. I ask her where they had hurt her and she tells me that she has already been tended to by one of the nurses.

"She gave me a sweet thing to eat when she was done and a sticky picture which I saved. It is of a flower. I'm going to give it to Major Sam when she wakes."

Daniel murmurs that Sam will be happy to see her and that she'll appreciate the flower sticker when she wakes up. The girl smiles and goes back to caressing the Colonel's hand.

I move to check on Sam and as I do, Teal'c returns with Jacob Carter on his heels.

He stops at the foot of her bed and I see anger, concern and grief all written across his face. He grips the bed and I step towards him, taking his arm.

"Jacob, she's alive. They both are. They're hanging on, but I've done all I can. I don't know what else I can do. I've wracked my brain to think of something I might have missed, but I'm coming up blank."

Jacob turns his head to see the Colonel and the same emotions seem to wash over him again. He comes closer to Sam and takes her hand.

"Hey, Sammy, it's dad. I'm here, baby, I'm here and where going to bring you back. Okay? I know you can hear me, sweetie. Hang in there, don't leave me Sam, we've got so much still to do. I love you, sweetheart, just like everyone else in this room, hell, in this mountain. Hang on, Sammy, please don't let go."

He says the last in a strangled whisper. He closes his eyes, picks up her hand and kisses it.

He requests information from me and I give him a rundown of what had happened and what her injuries are.

I had seen his mouth tighten when I mention her death at the hands of Ba'al. He is incensed and suddenly curses, swearing he will kill the Goa'uld the next time he sees him. Teal'c says it will not be necessary, that the Colonel has already exacted a fitting revenge for her and her family. Jacob Carter acknowledges this and then I continue. I briefly tell him about the other incident that the contusions on her body indicate may have occurred. I am not going to hold anything back from him. He starts to mutter darkly in Goa'uld and his eyes flash in anger. Karina cringes back and Daniel reassures her that he is a good man, that he is Sam's father and that he is here to help her get better. Jacob turns, but it is Selmac who apologizes to her. In the way of a child, Karina trustingly takes Daniel's words on board immediately and is instantly in awe that Jacob Carter is a demon, but a good one.

He asks me to continue and I tell him about the CAT scan that revealed the swelling to her brain, due to the two head injuries she had apparently sustained. I also mention the loss of blood due to the stab wound.

Selmac then spoke to me.

"The surgery was needed to relieve pressure to the brain, is this correct, Doctor Fraiser?"

I nod and tell him her pressure was dangerously low at times, but that we have stabilized her and she is holding her own.

They then ask about the Colonel and I inform them of everything I know. Teal'c and Daniel fill in the blanks and he listens.

He lets go of Sam's hand and walks over to examine his burns to his back.

Jacob himself speaks next.

"He did this to save Sammy, didn't he?"

Daniel whispers yes, as does Teal'c.

He takes the injured officer's and leans close to his ear. I can barely hear what he says, but I think he is thanking the Colonel for saving his little girl's life.

Karina asks, "Can you help him? He needs to wake up, so he can kiss Major Sam, so she can wake up too, like in the story."

Jacob smiles down at her, as Daniel tries to explain, stumbling over his words. Jacob raises his hand to stop him from speaking.

"Daniel, I am not blind! I've seen them together and at first I was against this, but as I've gotten to know Jack, I realized he would never let anything hurt my daughter. That he is a better man then most of the men I've known. No, I agree, it is time they let down their guards and finally let themselves feel what they've been fighting for these long years."

I am speechless. Wait till he hears the confession Sam had blurted out in the gate room. Even now, I will let General Hammond inform him of that one!

"Dr. Fraiser, I can use the healing device on the Colonel, but I don't think it will do much good on Sam. Selmac is telling me it might be futile and as much as I want to help my little girl, I think she's right. I'm going to help Jack first, with the burns to his back and other injuries. I have faith in you Doc, that you've done everything in your power to save my little girl. She'll be alright, I know it. "

I bite my lip and nod at him.

I call out to one of the airmen to go and get the healing device.

They have a fighting chance now that Jacob is here. He will heal the Colonel and a small part of me clings onto Karina's childish hope that, when he wakes, he will wake my best friend with a kiss.

Right now, I am desperately holding on to my wish for their happy ever after.