Disclaimer: MY SHAADOWWW'S THE ONLY ONE WHO WALKS BESIDE ME! MY SHALLOW HEART'S SOMETHING SOMETHING! AHHHH! Okay, sorry. xD I don't own Holes, and never will!
The Inspection Of CGL
Chapter Twenty One ll Stuffs And A Very Long Journal Entry
----------
ANDII'S POV.
OW-OW-OW!
PAIN!
PAIN! IN FACE! OUCH! ON CHEEK! OUCH!
I groaned as I shifted and immediately tensed up, silently screaming in my head.
OOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Slight. Pain. In. Ankle.
For a moment I thought I was gonna gag. I squeezed my eyes shut and braced myself for the terrible wrenching feeling that you feel when you throw up, but when I waited for ten seconds and nothing happened, I blearily opened my eyes and saw someone in front of me.
That's not Clover. I'm not in my tent. Ohmygiddyaunt, where am I? I've been kidnapped! SOMEONE HELP ME!
I grabbed the sleeping person by the collar and yelled (croakily), "I've called the police, if you're smart, then you'll let me go!"
I winced horribly at the pain that swept through my body at my sudden movements, but kept a tough face to scare my kidnapper.
He opened his eyes, startled, and blinked at me. Then he slowly looked down at my hand which was gripping tightly onto his collar.
"You're the one holding on," he said hoarsely.
I looked at him for a few moments longer, and gently released him, "Squid? What... where am I?" I was so confuzzled.
AHHH, I'VE BEEN DRUGGED!
"You're in the Warden's cabin," he told me, yawning. He looked out the window, and blinked, "Man, it's already morning! The sun's up! Holy chicken, I can't remember the last time I woke up after sunrise."
While he ranted about what a wonderful experience this was, I slowly remembered the previous day's events. Being interrogated by X-Ray and the others... that weird grandma underwear race Zig proposed... me and Armpit winning, then tripping... me smashing my head...
And then I must've blacked out, because the next thing I know, Squid's hovering above me. I was so tired and I really had no clue what was going on, but I remember telling him not to leave.
Yeah, that's about it.
"...and there's light! Glorious light! I'm waking up after the sun's come up! This is so - "
"Squid," I yawned, "Shut up."
Squid shut his big mouth up for a second and stared at me perplexedly. Then he started singing loudly, "There's always that one person that'll always have your heart, you'll never see it comin' 'cos you're blinded from the start!"
I picked up a cushion and chucked it at him, "SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP!"
The cushion didn't so much as muffle him, "KNOW THAT YOU'RE THAT ONE FOR ME, IT'S CLEAR FOR EVERYONE TO SEE - "
"What in heaven's name is going on here?" came a cross voice.
I looked up instantly (OW!) and winced as my neck made a painful cracking noise. The Warden woman had clearly just gotten up; her hair was a huge mess and her T-shirt was wrinkled and half-off her right shoulder.
Then her eyes widened, "Andii! How are you feeling, dear?"
"I - err - " I said, a bit distracted, "Oh, shut up, Squid."
The WW frowned and glanced at Squid, who instantly shut his mouth and smiled innocently at her.
"I'm in pain. It all kinda hurts," I finally answered. It hurts like bruised mangoes, more like.
"Well, that's to be expected," the Warden woman told me motheringly, "After all, you do have a rather large scratch, and Mr. Pendanski says your ankle's fractured - "
"It can't be," I blurted out, sitting up and shaking my ankle, "I've had a fractured ankle before and it hurts WAY MORE than this."
I winced painfully.
Both Squid and the WW looked at me pointedly.
"What?" I said irritably, "I said it's not a fractured ankle, not that it doesn't hurt! It's probably swollen or something."
"Well, can you stand up?"
I'm not paralysed, thank you.
I nodded indignantly and slowly slid my legs onto the ground. With a sharp intake of breath, I got to my feet and grinned triumphantly. I have smited the Ankle Pain, LOOK WHO'S THE BEST N -
I gave a little shriek as I toppled sideways onto the floor.
Laughing, Squid walked over and, by grabbing my arm, helped me back up.
"Well, you obviously can't," the Warden woman said a bit curtly, though she was smiling, "Andii, I think you should rest today and forget about - "
"No," I cut in bluntly, trying to steady myself by holding Squid's arm, "To tell you the truth, ma'am - " (Squid snorted in laughter again) " - I've been slacking off a bit and I need to get all the reports and stuff done..."
The Warden woman just Looked at me, and I started fidgeting. Squid was still shaking in laughter, and when I stared at him Evil-Like, he mouthed, "You called her ma'am!"
"All right," she finally said in a snappish manner, "But Squid - " the Idiot stopped laughing and jerked up, " - you will accompany Andii and make sure she gets around all right. You will not have to dig any holes for the next couple of days." It looked like it was killing her to say this, but she tried to keep a straight face.
Squid gaped at her, "Not... dig... holes?" was all he could manage to say.
"Yes. Seeing as this young lady here can't get around by herself - "
"I can get around by myself!" I said a bit angrily, letting go of Squid's arm and almost falling flat on my face again.
The WW rolled her eyes, "Don't try and hurt yourself, Andii. You obviously can't walk properly with that busted ankle, and Squid here is strong and handsome enough to hold you up."
It was my turn to snort in laughter.
"All right you two, everyone has already started digging - "
"Even D-tent?" Squid asked excitedly, though I had no idea why he was so hyped about D-tent-cabin digging.
"Yes."
"Can we go visit them?" I asked, having finally stopped laughing.
The WW raised her eyebrows, "In your state...?"
"Could Mr. Pendanski drive us?" I pleaded.
"Doctor..." Squid snorted and started laughing again, and I raised my eyebrows at him.
Goodness, and he calls me insane.
"Alright, alright," the Warden woman gave in once again, "Hurry up though."
Grinning like Cheshire cats, we thanked her in unison (she looked kind of embarrassed but genuinely pleased) and hopped into the truck with Mr. Sir, as Mr. Pendanski was off frolicking elsewhere.
Squid was definitely on some sort of drug as he played an air guitar in the truck. He kept singing loudly and I hid my face and looked out of the window, hoping no one would ever find out about this.
The veins in Mr. Sir's head were popping out slightly, but he kept his mouth shut while Squid crooned, "MY SHADOOOOW'S THE ONLY ONE WHO WALKS BESIDE ME!"
For once, I felt sympathy towards the man who barks like a dog.
And I knew there was at least one thing we had in common.
Our burning desire to strangle Squid.
Finally, the truck stopped and I saw the boys digging away merrily. We got off slightly far away from the digging site, and Squid helped me on his back. Mr. Sir rolled his eyes and muttered something about "sappiness" before slamming the truck door shut.
Squid started walking over to the boys as I held onto him tightly. If he drops me, I will do something much worse to him.
"HEY!" Caveman yelled joyfully, seeing us and waving wildly with his shovel.
"SHE'S ALIVE!" Zigzag screamed.
I had to grin as Squid put me down gently, still holding me by the shoulders so I wouldn't fall. The D-tent boys all discarded their shovels and holes and ran towards us, grinning.
I winced painfully when I was attacked with several hugs.
"Aww, how are you?"
"Man, that bandage is ugly!"
"You got blood in your hair and shirt!"
At this remark, I immediately released Zero who I was hugging at that moment, and looked down.
I screamed.
"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Oh, yuck! Blood! BLOOD!" I was a bit hysterical, to put it mildly.
"Have you showered, 'lil gal?" Armpit asked, as if it really mattered.
I shook my head.
The boys all suddenly backed away, going, "Ewww, gross," and, "To think I hugged her!"
I rolled my eyes at them as they laughed and came forward again, patting me on the head and back.
"So you're really all right?" X-Ray asked, trying to sound cool and casual, "You gave us a pretty big scare when you smashed into the glass thing."
"Yeah, I'm fine," I replied, smiling at the eager faces around me, "It's just my ankle. I can't stand on my own, or walk, or anything that shows that I am a very independent woman."
"Woman," snorted Zig, "You'll always be the 'lil girl to me."
"Little is right," joked Caveman, walking up next to me and measuring how much taller he was. I think everyone was a bit surprised when he was only just about a head taller.
I'M GROWING, I'M GROWING!
"Hey, the chicka's shot up a little!" proclaimed Magnet, looking awed.
"Bwahahahaha, when I'm all taller than you, I'll visit by your houses and use your swimming pools as... er..." I was a bit lost at what to say, and I lost my balance during my concentration and gripped harder onto Squid's arm to prevent myself from falling.
"So, you gonna dig?" X asked Squid, who looked like a mouse as he shook his head.
The boys all gave one, collective gasp.
I applauded, beaming.
"What are you clapping for?"
"Unity!" I exclaimed, still clapping but having to stop as I was starting to wobble again (stupid ruddy ankle), "You guys are becoming one! Together, you will unite and show that no one can smite you because you are whole."
"I swear, you could run for president one day."
"That's going a little too far."
"Yeah, we're all delighted the girlie's back, but d'yer think we could spare a mom' to GET SOME WATER!" Mr. LAMISC roared. (Warthog blood?)
The boys came back to themselves and looked disgruntled as they picked up their canteens and went over to the truck. Mr. Sir glowered at me and Squid as he filled X-Ray's canteen.
Honestly, what is that man's problem?
Is something lodged up his caboose somewhere?
Nevertheless, once he finished filling the canteens and telling lame jokes, he dropped me and Squid off at the compound before driving off to E-tent.
Once I went back in my tent and Squid went back to his cabin, I grabbed my bag and tipped it upside down. Lots of stuff fell out. I grabbed a piece of gum and crammed it in my mouth.
After I showered and got dressed, I hopped over to the D-tent cabin, where Squid was sitting on the steps, gazing at the sky.
He looked completely endearing.
CLICK.
Squid shook his head and stared at me, "Man, could you get rid of that thing?"
"Nope," I put my camera away, "C'mon, I've been hopping all over the place and I'm tired."
"You sure you don't wanna just rest?" he asked me anxiously.
"Yup."
"Well... don't overwork yourself," Squid moved forward and did something unexpected.
He hugged me.
I was in shock for a moment, but then a smile crept over my face and I wrapped my arms around him. It felt... nice.
Squid released me and grinned sheepishly, "C'mon on, get on, you lazy princess." Rolling my eyes, I hopped onto his back and he started to carry me towards the Mess Hall.
SEVEN MINUTES LATER.
"So..." I drawled, looking around the empty Mess Hall and scribbling stuff on the form, "How's the cassette coming along?"
"It's pretty good," Squid replied, chewing on that blasted toothpick, "We've all recorded at least two entries."
"I look forward to hearing it," I said, knowing I was feeling nothing of that sort.
"Err - your fingers are crossed again," he said, snickering, "Anyway, I thought the AG dude was the one who listened to that tape thingy."
I wrapped my arms around his neck and he lifted me up and started piggy-backing me out of the Mess Hall as I replied, "Aha, that's what you think, but I'm going to have a sneak peek at it. See what you guys have said, and wipe it out if you don't... say anything pleasant about moi."
Squid laughed, "You're going to have to hand the AG a blank tape, then."
I whacked him on the head and said in a dignified way, "I'm sure that the intelligent ones, such as Zero and Caveman, will have plenty of pleasantries about me!"
"Don't be too sure, 'lil girl."
I glared at the back of his head.
We spent all morning hanging around the Mess Hall, with me "inspecting" the place. I asked the kitchen helpers some questions, and that pretty much took a couple of hours as they talk in-creeeed-i-bly sl-oooow-ly.
And they also had no idea how to answer things properly.
Daft, those ones are.
By the time it was noon, I had written two pages of notes about the kitchen. It mostly contained stuff about how obscure the food is, but I didn't use the word obscure. Of course not! Instead, I just said it didn't meet satisfactory standards.
That sounds sophisticated, yeah?
"No way," Squid said, his eyes crinkled up in distaste, "It sounds like you're some posh, prissy, dancing queen from... from somewhere."
"Yeah, and what kind of compliment is that, gay-clock?" I shot back.
"Gay-clock? What the heck, you queer-spoon!"
"Queer spoon? Well take this - " hard poke " - you blubbering clownfish!"
Gasp. "You dare call me that? I will not take it, you ungrateful, little, disabled antelope!" Grab journal. Bonk.
"OW! My beautiful hair! Oh, you imbecile, you've wrecked it!" Snatch back journal. Thwack.
After that - erm - hearty argument, in which we both sprouted bruises, we had a very nice... lunch.
"FOOD FIGHT!" Splat.
"OH, BULLOCKS YOU!"
"Ah - ah - ARGH! You got peanut butter in my hair!"
"Serves you right, jerk-tin! ...AHHHH! JELLY! I HATE JELLY!"
"Bwahahahahaha, Squid wins yet again - oh, witherwings - "
Crash.
"What in the name of all things holy is going on?"
"Er..."
And, um, after lunch, Squid and I cleaned ourselves up a bit and made a truce that we would never ever start another food fight again. We had a bit of quiet time and sat on the porch of the Mess Hall, where I rounded up my perfect, neat, perfect, legible, perfect, rosy-cheeked work.
"Is... is it nice, in Palmoilin?"
I frowned slightly and looked up at Squid, whose eyes were glazed over and seemed distant. He stared straight ahead, and after a minute of staring at him with my eyebrows raised, he looked at me and gave me a weak smile.
"Sorry about that... I... it's just... don't worry."
I glanced back down at my notebook and said conversationally, "Yeah, it's a nice place. But extremely snobby. Everyone raised in that place has a rotten, spoilt personality, and it's kind of... it's kind of like a haven in which you're barred off from the real world."
Squid just nodded simply.
After a moment's awkward silence, I couldn't take it anymore.
"What's the matter?" I asked him finally.
He looked a bit startled, "Nothing."
"As if. Spit it out."
"Fine," Squid said defiantly, obviously not wanting to be defeated by me. He took a deep breath, "Sometimes... well... we, you know, me and the other guys... we talk about it."
"Talk about what?" I said curiously, chewing on my pen.
"What it'd be like if we had lived there."
That had me stumped, "Don't you guys all hate that place?"
"Yeah, but..." Squid looked at me and I looked back. There was something in his eyes that I had seen flashes of when we argued over something utterly pointless, or when we're by ourselves and talking. I had always seen it linger in the back of his eyes, but now it was right there, clear for everyone to see.
He blinked and looked away, and I felt a bit light-headed.
"Okay," Squid took another deep breath, "If we had all grown up there, none of us would be here. We'd have a good life. It's... it's a bit of a fantasy, I guess."
I was silent. For once. (Oh, the shock!)
"Ah, forget it," Squid said hastily, turning pink, "It was stupid of me to mention it. Just forg - "
"It's not a perfect place," I broke in, turning to him seriously.
"I... I knew that," he said a bit lamely.
"Well, good," I said, attempting to sound like my usual self, but failing to, "I mean, it's not as though drugs and all that sort of stuff doesn't wing its way in there. The place's polluted as well."
I didn't mean to say all that, but my stay at Camp Green Lake had made me see how different my home was to the rest of the world. Home. What used to be home was slowly becoming a place I sort of resented.
I'll never see Pal the way I used to.
Oh dear, Claude will slap me.
"What d'you mean?" Squid asked curiously, popping in a fresh toothpick.
"Tina."
"What?"
...Curses, now why did I say that?
I hadn't thought about her in ages. I guess I'd almost forgotten the incident. But all this talk about Pal being the most perfect place on Earth gave me this leaping feeling that I had to prove them wrong. Palmoilin's not perfect and I might just murder the next person who says so.
" 'Lil girl?" Squid was trying to get my attention, as I had blanked out, "Who's Tina?"
Ahhhh well... the boys here have spilled out their pasts to me, I s'pose I could spare a piece of info for them too.
"She's my cousin," I said casually, staring at my notebook, "She's in New York at the moment."
"NYC?" Squid repeated, looking sceptical, "What's she doin' there?"
"She's been there for almost a year now."
"Oh, did she move out or something? Got tired of Palmoilin?" Squid grinned stupidly and I felt like hugging him right there and then, "How old is she?"
"Eighteen," I answered, after thinking a bit, "She's there for the top and best therapy in all of America. In all of the world, I guess. Her mum's hysterical about making sure she gets the best treatment."
"Oh," Squid's smile faltered a bit, "What's wrong with her?"
I sighed, "Her family was going down. It turned out her father was cheating money off of his clients and was basically a criminal. Her mum went ballistic, of course. She's a real money-grabbing, greedy cow, to put it nicely. Her parents split up."
Squid didn't say anything, and for once, I realised he was in my position and I was in the boys'. Usually, they were the ones pouring out their pasts to me, but this time, it's my turn to tell my story.
"My mum offered to take Tina in for the weekend while the divorce got straightened out and everything. Their house would have to be sold if Tina's father ever wanted to pay back the people he had stolen from," I sighed again and doodled in my notebook, "They agreed to the proposal.
"I'd always been close to Tina, despite her being so old. She was like an older sister. One night, my parents went out to dinner and it was just me, her and Claude."
"Who's Claude?" Squid interrupted, as though it really mattered.
"My best friend," I said dismissively, "Tina was supposed to entertain us, but she'd been depressed lately. Claude hates seeing anyone sad, so she suggested we went to the movies. We checked with my parents and they said it was fine."
"And?" Squid pressed on. It was then I realised we were sitting relatively close to each other and I could feel his shoulder against mine.
I bit my lip as I thought back to the night, "We saw her boyfriend at the cinemas with another girl... they were a bit cosy..."
"Ooh," Squid looked sad, "What a jerk."
"Yeah... there was this huge scene... ah, it was pretty cool. If I didn't know and hadn't been so worried about Tina, I would have kicked back to watch with some popcorn. But as it was, Claude and I were too busy trying to keep her from popping the Evil Chick's plastic surgery."
"Oh, man, you are so gross," Squid said, laughing.
"Look who's talking! Well, before I was rudely interrupted - "
"I interrupted politely!"
"There you go again! So aaaaanywaaaaaay, Tina just ran off... and Claude got all het up at Tina's now ex-boyfriend and told him he was one big fat b - "
"Do not cuss, 'lil girl."
I rolled my eyes, "And he got momentarily stunned that a little thirteen-year-old would say that. We couldn't find Tina afterwards, so we split. I had a cold and had a massive headache by then, so Claude said I should go back home to check, while she went to the restaurant my parents were at. It was all in walking distance, so it was fine."
Squid nodded and I realized I was trembling a bit. He looked down at my hand and seemed to notice the same thing. To my surprise, he wrapped his larger hand around my small one and squeezed it. I looked up at him shyly and he smiled at me.
What is happening to me...?
I gulped and ploughed on with my story, "I found Tina crying at home, in the kitchen. I comforted her a bit and she just said she was alright and everything. So I went to grab some painkillers for my headache. My mobile started ringing in the living room, and I went to pick it up. It was my mum. I told her that Tina was alright, and she said that's good but they were coming home with Claude, to play it safe."
"Then what happened?"
"I'm getting there," I said a tad bit impatiently, "After I hung up, Tina was gone. And so were the painkillers."
Squid's eyes widened. Usually, most people don't understand how serious it was when she had disappeared with the pills. But I guess someone like him would understand, especially with his mother and all...
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.
"I waited for my family and Claude to turn up. Then I told them what had happened. My dad immediately pushed me into the car with Claude, and my mum took my baby sister to the house to phone people. My dad, Claude and I drove around, looking for Tina."
"Was she alright?" Squid's voice was hoarse, and he looked really concerned.
I shook my head. Tears sprang into my eyes.
"We found her passed out on the streets. She had taken the pills with alcohol..." I gasped and wiped my eyes furiously, "I was so scared... I didn't know... we had no idea... she was all lifeless and everything. It was all my fault."
"It wasn't your fault," Squid said softly, and I looked at him tearily, "You did all you could. It was her choice to take the painkillers."
"But I shouldn't have let her out of my sight!" I gabbled, furiously blinking away tears, "I knew she was really upset, what with her father and her boyfriend and her crumbling family, and it's my fault she was able to walk off in that state. And... and I just left the pills lying there on the counter! I'm so stupid!"
" 'Lil girl - "
"She could have died!" I yelled.
My words cut through the air like a knife.
He looked at me intensely and that just made me tear up even more.
"She hates New York. She hates therapy. And she doesn't want to live with her mother, she wants to live her father!" I was standing up, screaming at no one in particular, "And it's all my fault where she is today!" I took a deep breath, then burst into fresh tears.
I've become absolutely hysterical.
Squid stood up and grabbed my hands, and without thinking, I buried my face in his chest and started crying.
I cried for Tina.
I cried for all those who suffered like she did.
I cried because I miss my family.
But most of all, I cried because one day I'll have to leave Camp Green Lake, and I don't ever want to.
---
Project Inspect Camp Green Lake - Journal
17th of August. (Day 27)
Mood:
mellow
Time: 8:54pm
Joyous times at Camp Green Lake. Forgive me for not recording an entry sooner.
Well, it's rather hard to write when you get run over a truck, right?
...So I didn't get run over by a truck, but Mr. Pendanski almost did. I was wearing a desert-print shirt and, apparently, I looked like part of the scenery. Which didn't make much sense as I was standing in front of a grey-brown building. Orange would stand out, wouldn't it? I suppose he just wants to run me over. My very best friend has turned against me. It was bound to happen some day...
--
"Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you - "
"Um - "
" - whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks, I will be right here waiting for yoooooouuuu!"
"You might wanna move out of the way, 'lil girl."
"Why?"
"Pendanksi's not stopping any time soon."
"HOLY CRAP!"
HOOOONK. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK.
--
...Anywho, I had a traumatic experience (other than the truck situation) that has resulted in a long scar on my face. A scar. On my face. You'd think I'd be happy that I might look like Harry Potter's great grandfather or something, but I'm not.
I don't wanna go in detail. I might break down and smudge this page. xD But anyway, I've finished interviewing all the boys, and the day afterward we had this fun and games kind of day in the WW's cabin.
Then I turned into Harry Potter's great aunt.
'Nuff said.
I woke up the next day in the cabin and had a bit of a freak out. Squid was also there with me, and I thought he was a kidnapper at first. So yeah. Then the Warden woman came in and let Squid not dig holes for the next couple of days so he can help me around while I do the reports on this lovely kentucky-fried camp. Oh yeah, apart from the scar I inherited, I've also got a SWOLLEN ANKLE. Unfortunately that means I can't walk on my own, so Squid gives me piggy-backs and just generally helps me around.
It's actually kinda nice. It's been like this for the past 3 days. Just getting carried around while I feel important and write important stuff in my important notebook. I might have to eat an entire pizza before I admit it to him, but Squid's kinda growing on me. We're getting closer, while we talk and fight. On my first day of "interviewing" the kitchens, we had this major food fight. And then we had this really serious talk, where I even started crying about Tina. 'Twas quite scary, to be honest.
Hmm... so what else has happened?
I really miss the other D-tent guys, whom I don't see much of. Well, at breakfast (yes, I bother to get up at 4:30 to see them - they should feel honoured), then sometimes after their showers, and then at dinner. But I'm too busy writing up reports (the actual ones) that I don't have time to sit and chat endlessly about nothing in particular.
Speaking of showers (though I mentioned that a couple of lines ago), I got completely soaked one dear afternoon. I was just outside the shower stalls, inspecting the dodgy building, when...
--
"What a very odd building," I said, blinking several times and making mental notes in my head. I jumped back a little when I heard a scratchy, strained, terrible voice croon.
"I'm walking on sunshine, WA-HA! And don't it feel good! Ooooh yeah!"
Combine that with the constant pitter-patter of water, and it was HEE-LARIOUS.
I burst out laughing like a newly-escaped mental-institute patient.
And then...
BOOM!
I blinked several times again as several boys showering yelped (and I started to giggle as I remembered the singing) and then an explosion of water roared over the tops of the stalls and crashed right onto me.
Yep, me.
Just imagine a brunette standing in the middle of the desert, dripping wet, clutching onto a sodden notebook, and looking like a complete buffoon.
I must add that to my autobiography.
"Hooooooooooooooooly macaroooooooni!" I heard the same sunshine-singing-boy scream (HAHAHA!), "The-thingy-exploded! The-shower-water-tap-thing-exploded-and-then-water-came-rushing-out-and-wowzers-wasn't-that-really-cool-let's-do-it-again!"
"I NEED WATER!" another boy screamed.
"AHH, I'M COVERED IN SOAP SUDS AND THE SHOWER STOPPED!" Zero was yelling.
Zero was yelling.
Zero was yelling.
"Hey, I only had a two minute shower! No fair! I need to put this in the complaints box!" huffed yet another boy.
"I'M MELTING, I'M MELTING!" I shrieked for good measure.
" 'Lil girl?" Squid emerged from the shower stalls, half-dressed and his hair sopping wet. His towel was slung over his shoulder and he smirked, "Why're you all wet?"
Quivering, I pointed at the shower stalls, "Explosion tap thing."
"Ahhh, yeah. I heard 'bout that. Lucky I had already had my shower," Squid was still smirking as he covered me with his towel, "C'mon, you better dry off before you catch a cold."
Mr. Sir fought through the knot of (dry) boys that were cheering at the tap failure. I truly felt sorry for the boys still stuck in the stalls, naked and probably covered in soap.
"Dang them plumbers!" Mr. LAMISC began to yell obscenities, "They guaranteed a ten-year use!"
--
...Squid just led me away back to my tent while I continued to snicker about the singing. Honestly, it was so funny! Haha, I'm still laughing now.
(The next two pages are then full of "HAHAHEHEHEHOHOS! We will skip over these to read the much more pointless entries.)
Okay... I am much calmer now. Tee-hee. Umm... oh, yeah! I told Squid about Robert. I dunno why. I usually find it hard to talk about it and I slap Claude every time she laughingly mentions it, but I just told him. The stupid boy named after seafood.
I am going to sue CGL for brainwashing me...
--
"Hey... 'lil girl?"
"Ya?"
"Have you... ever been asked out before?"
"Dude, don't you reckon that's a bit personal?"
"Why has this conversation all ended in question marks?"
"They wouldn't if you had bad punctuation."
"You just ended it with a full stop."
"As did you."
"Right," Squid stared at the floor, "So?" he prompted expectantly.
I sighed and glared at him irritably for interrupting me from my IMPORTANT WORK, "Yes, Squid, I have. Happy?"
He suddenly looked rather murderous, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why.
"How... many times?" he managed to get out.
"Once."
He looked even more murderous, "Only once?"
"Yes, Squid, only once," I said patiently, deciding to humour him.
"Who was he?"
"His name's Robert, and he goes to my school."
"How'd he ask you?"
I sighed sadly, "He used a pick-up line."
Squid snorted in vengeful laughter, "Yeah? What was it? 'I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?' " Suddenly, he looked livid with anger as he said evilly, "He didn't say that, did he?"
I hoped very much that he'd die a painful death one day as I replied, "No. He asked me, and I quote, "Do you have balls?" "
Squid looked confronted for a moment. It seemed as though he was debating whether to march over to Pal and wring Robert by the neck, or start laughing and point at me, singing, "Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah!"
Sadly, he began laughing.
Happily, I smacked him.
--
...Robert asking me out has got to be one of the most humiliating things ever. I wanna forget about and stomp on it and toss it in the ocean to swim with the fishies, but I just told the boy who is the King of all Fish.
What is wrong with me?
Anywho, I had other small chats with the D-tent boys. We managed to squeeze in a fun game of Red Light, Green Light. Zero came up to me today and said he misses me. It was so cute. Even X remarked that, "Ya know, it's kinda weird without the 'lil gal around, annoying the bajeebes outta you."
Dearie me, I'm tearing up now.
As mentioned before, Squid and I are getting closer. My ankle's also healing very nicely. I can walk now, but I need to lean on someone. Squid's always there to help me around. It's cool. I've hugged him way too much though.
He's got majorly nice hair, did I mention that?
And yes, I have, precisely, come to terms that I do like Squid in a MORETHANAFRIENDLYWAY, and that, of course, I will personally kill you if you mention this to anyone. You have been warned. That was a warning. As was that.
I am a girl.
So farewell, you stupid spoon. (I didn't mean that.)
--Andii.
---
Day 28
Upon hearing that I could walk by myself and that I would be staying in my tent most of the day to write/type up essays, the Warden woman immediately seized Squid and choked him, screaming, "GO BACK TO DIGGING, DIG, FOR THE LOVE OF SHOVELS, JUST DIG!"
Okay, so maybe not that aggressively.
I ate breakfast with D-tent where they proceeded to gag me and put me under the table, for I was insulting some random rapper they all happen to adore.
Puh-leez.
"AKANTEAAF!" I tried to yell.
"Quiet, 'lil gal."
When they ungagged me, they told me to never ever insult Chingy again.
What kinda name is Chingy?
I followed them out to the "Library" for my last goodbyes for the day. It was while we were out there when we heard some rather harsh things.
Armpit was teaching me how to dance with a shovel when we heard a black B-tenter snicker to another, "Heh, look at that chick... mentally challenged, that one is... heard she came from Diamondville."
"No kidding, that skanky little snob? Heh."
I ignored them and laughed over-heartily at a demented dance move Armpit showed me.
Squid and X-Ray had tensed up, and Zig was staring, wide-eyed, at the B-tenters.
"...white-trash hoe..."
"Yeah, why dunnit she go back to where she belong? Rich..."
Squid threw down his shovel and made his way over to them, but X and Magnet grabbed him back.
Armpit had stopped dancing and the veins in his temples were throbbing.
I sighed.
Boys are such little soldier figurines.
The seven D-tent boys looked expectantly at me while the B-tenters, still cawing in laughter, moved off.
I looked back at them and shrugged. I mouthed, "IGNORE THEM!" and moved swiftly towards them, "See y'all later, okay? Have fun digging."
"Alright, but be careful, chicka."
I smiled at them appreciatively before hugging each of them and waving them off, like a mother saying goodbye to her children on the first day of school. When they were gone, I hobbled back to my tent.
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A/N: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PEOPLE! Okay, okay! Hi hi! Haha. Back to school next week. (screams) I'M IN YR 9! (runs around in triangles) Okay... take deeeeep breath. Rightio! Haha. I'm terribly sorry, but I ripped off The O.C. in a most inhumane way. As you will know and have thrown delelicious tomatoes by now, the whole tale of Tina and the overdosing of pills and therapy and evil mother and criminal father is based entirely on MARISSA and the whole shemomble from the bestest show created by Josh Schwartz! So I disclaim the idea completely.
The end. (And the crowd goes wild)
AHHHHHHHHHH I'M TRYING TO WRESTLE CLOVER FROM MY LIL BRO! (Yes, I do actually have a stuffed cow called Clover. How I loveth him.)
Anyway, it's Australia Day tomorrow so you all have to be extra nice to me. Hehe, I'm just kidding. But thanks for the reviews, of course.
Now I'm gonna try and respond in just one sentence. Impossible? I think not...
I think 'moshi' means a mixture of, "yeah?" "hey!" "hello?" and the whole shebang; and yes, I do agree Squid is cute and how he reacts to Andii is positively adorable; I will scream and squeal with you!; hehe, Andii shall not die, she will never die, until she dies; the Squid/Andii relationship is very mild but plays an important part, so please don't expect too much; and yes, yay for Chinese New Year, cheap money shall wing its way to me, hahaha!; the Wicked Witch of the West is SO FREAKY: I COULD SMOTE HER!; yes, poor Andii indeed, would hate to be her but she gets to hug Zero so AISH; hehe, several people seemed to miss the SQUID'S POV in the last chap, so I forgive you; SQUID LOVES ANDII - HOW CUTE; yup, gotta love Holsey; Squid is indeed awesome, let us attack him with hugs; AND FINALLY, I HATE CHEESE!
YIPEE! Although that was probably lots of sentences as an exclamation mark marks the end of a sentence... pleh. :)
Let us play a game. It's called Tell A Random Story, here I go: Mum wanted to buy Japanese food, I stopped her and made her buy chicken instead. YUM. Now it's your go. :D
Byebye everyone, remember I love you all! - msq.
PS. Please read and review These Kids. PLEASE!