Disclaimer: I don't own Holes, and never will!
The Inspection Of CGL
Epilogue ll Contemplating: WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?
Dear Princess,
Everything's fine here. Everyone's fine. The camp is fine. The digging is fine. Really, CGL can't get any finer than this -
YOU GOTTA GET ME OUT OF HERE!
X just left the room - he was reading over my shoulder. Now I can tell you the truth! The standards of Camp Green Lake have deteriorated. OVERWHELMINGLY. For breakfast, guess what we got.
Rice pudding.
(I can just hear you now - "Ewww!") And I agree; it's gross. All lumpy and flavourless as if we were eating stewed cardboard. I can't believe we had to eat it. Even Armpit ate slower than usual, and that, squire, is revolutionary.
The other guys are okay, I guess. Zig's refusing to stop wearing a piece of aluminum foil on his head. We dunno if he's fooling around or if he's seriously lost his marbles this time.
We all miss you of course. Magnet and Caveman even wrote a poem for you, but the piece of paper got caught up in Armpit's shower towel and no one wants to touch it now. The ink's run everywhere and typical them, they can't remember what they wrote.
I gotta hand it to you, you certainly left in style. Bumping your head on the car – real smooth. You'll start a trend. Then your sister almost fell out of the window trying to wave to us. She's becoming more like you everyday! Heh, just teasing 'lil girl.
Seb - you know that black-haired dude your friend Claude was talking to? - keeps talking to me about her. I think he really likes her, for all he says about her being rich trash (ironic, eh?) and all that. It sounds like they already knew each other beforehand...?
Anyway, X just came back in and wants to play pool. I guess I'll finish this up and drop it in the mail box. Don't give yourself a paper cut opening this letter.
Cheers, Squid.
Dear Squid,
I'm glad you're thinking about me and writing to me! It brings me great joy to know that your mind is upon me day and night, night and daaaaaaay...
You scared yet? Haha.
Why on earth did you have to keep writing "fine" just cos X-Ray was reading over your shoulder? Have I missed something? Did X become the new Warden? Is he suppressing you all with his reign of terror? Making you consume rice pudding every meal of the day? Mmmm.
Rice pudding is delicious, don't you dare speak ill of it again!
Zig's abnormal behaviour should wear off soon, right? It always does. Remember when he chased me with a shovel? But I hope he never changes. He's so very funny and entertaining. It's what makes Zig, Zig. Does that make sense?
Ngaww, do say thank you to dearest Magnet and Caveman for me, even if I never get to hear the beloved poem. :)
Hey, do you know the kind of bruise I have on my head now? I don't think it can be called just a bruise, more... a permanent mark of PAIN!
I wish Cecily did fall out... she's becoming so annoying these days I wish SHE NEVER LEFT MY MOTHER'S WOMB.
Just kidding. :) I love my sister, even if she is at that troublesome age.
Claude had a pen pal at CGL. No wonder why she was so eager to come all the way out to the desert with me and my family! It turns out I wasn't the only correspondent between CGL and Palmoilin. After I left, they picked a couple of kids from my school and made them write letters to you guys (or I'm assuming the guys of other tents, seeing as none of you ever mentioned a letter) as part of an English assignment.
I know, I was laughing for ten minutes when she told me.
But I can't believe Claude the evil girl never told me! I don't think she was planning to at all, but I can be very persuasive.
Unfortunately for my dearest friend (she hates writing), she got picked, and her lovely little letter (consisted of five words, I believe) was received by none other than Mr. Sebastian. (Dark-haired C-tent guy - Seb, I take it?) Hehe, I think she likes him too. LET'S PLAY MATCHMAKER. We can be the Cupid and Cupidette of Camp Green Lake-Palmoilin uniting programme!
I miss all of you guys. Hope you enjoyed your game of pool. And write back soon!
Lots of hugs, Andii.
Andiimania –
Check out Renee's new hair cut. …Unique, no? Anyway, regarding the letter you're sending to MR SQUID YOUR FUTURE HUSBAND (puehehe) – what do you mean "no wonder" I went out into the middle of the desert? Hmph, I would have gone with you regardless, even if there was no idiot named Sebastian insert-last-name residing there.
And I never told you cos it slipped my mind. Or I was shy about it. SO THERE.
…AND I DO NOT LIKE SEB. If you play matchmaker, I will hire a hitman. To assassinate you. And then I will bury you. In my backyard. Under the willow tree.
The end. :)
s2 claude.
Ms Claudette –
PASSING NOTES IS NAUGHTY. I REFUSE TO COMPLY.
…HOWEVER, I MUST SAY THAT YOUR HEART IS FILLED WITH AFFECTION FOR THIS SUBJECT NAMED 'SEB'. DO YOU DENY IT?
Andii
PS. Do you know how annoying that s2 thing is? A heart? That is not a heart! It is an "es" and a "tooh". Which, when combined, makes no sense whatsoever! Hmph.
To a soon-to-be deceased Andii –
Do you know how rude it is to write IN CAPITAL LETTERS? In Asian culture, you would be disowned by your family. No kidding.
s2 claude.
To my darling Claudette who is still in denial –
You will be pleased to hear that I have not a drop of oriental blood in me. Therefore I do not need to be worried about disownment. :)
c5 andii
Andii –
WHAT THE HECK IS c5?
s2 claude.
Claude –
Err… Calcium subscript 5?
c5 Andii.
Andii –
… The symbol for Calcium is 'Ca', not 'C'.
s2 claude.
Dear Andii,
OH. MY. GUARDIANS.
You will never guess what's happened! You probably already know a bit of it... but WHOA. I'll leave you some space to guess, okay? Because it's THAT huge.
.
.
.
.
.
AHH FORGET IT I'll just tell you. It's so long and complicated. Where to start. OKAY, well. The AG visited us! With this small group of people, all wearing suits and looking really pro. I dunno why you don't like him, he seemed pretty cool. Apparently they came because of your reports, and they wanted to check the camp out for themselves. Naturally the Warden and Mr. Sir were shaking in their boots when they saw them. Heh. Serves them right, they've been TORTURING us guys for months!
So anyway, to suck up to them the Warden told us we only had to dig two-feet holes for the next week or so. PAAAAAAARRRRRTY. It probably doesn't seem like much but hey, you've never had to dig yourself. (Except when we rescued Clover - but that's completely different.)
Digging's suddenly become a blast and we all have a laugh out there. But anyway, the other day, Caveman and Zero were having this digging competition even though we knew Zero the lovable mole was gonna win. They were digging beside each other so their holes would eventually merge into one. The rest of us were rooting them on and cheering when suddenly there's this THUD and they both stop digging.
THERE WAS A BOX OF TREASURE!
I'll leave you some space to get over the shock.
.
.
.
.
.
A BOX OF TREASURE! It was actually a suitcase. But it was hectic! We almost crushed Zero to crowd around and look at it, and GUESS. WHAT?
It's got Caveman's name on it. Stanley Yanoulis or something like that.
Yeah, I'll give you some more space...
.
.
.
.
.
.
And we're all like, "What the heck is his name doing on this box?" and then Zero said, "Well obviously it belongs to him." And we all turn to Caveman and demand why he's never told us his worldly possessions are buried out in the middle of nowhere, but he's so shocked himself he looks like a stunned mullet.
Of course, we all start talking about how we can open it, but then the AG and everyone walks over. Right on cue, eh? It was like fate. There was a new lady, Ms. Monkey or something of the like, who can talk like crazy. Man, she was one wicked lady! She was yelling at the AG and the Warden and everyone, saying something about keeping someone shut up for no liable reason bla bla bla bla bla. Anyway, turns out she's Caveman's lawyer.
Yup. Caveman's got a box of worldly possessions he's never known about, and a lawyer!
That's when the Warden saw the suitcase and she went BALLISTIC. Started screaming and shrieking and yelling and throwing a tantrum.
Oh, it's dinner now. I'll write more later. So how was your day?
Great. We had hot dogs. I'll smudge some tomato sauce on this letter for you to show you what you're missing out on.
Oops. Those words that are now smudged read "so how was your day?"
Okay, so the Warden was screaming and everything, diving and trying to grab the suitcase, and poor lil Zero was hugging it and trying to avoid getting hit by the crazy woman. He only managed to escape her wrath because we stood around him. She looked a little worse for wear, to tell you the truth. The adults tried to restrain her, but I've never seen anyone so hysterical. Made me almost feel sorry for her.
Ms. Monkey came out and asked which one was Stanley, and Caveman squeaked and put his hand up. She said something about him being released cos he's not actually guilty of the crime he was convicted for, and to hurry up and pack up his stuff already cos they were going back home.
The many shocks that must have hit the Caveman that day. We braced ourselves for a passing out.
I can't exactly remember what happened next. I think we all moved back to the compound... the AG made the people give us sodas (he is my idol) and sat us down in the Mess Hall. He explained that CGL was going to be closed down in two months, and the others whooped like they'd never whooped before. Ahh... that was excellent. Then Caveman told Ms. Monkey flat out that he didn't want to leave yet. And she pursed her lips and went all huffy, but then in the end she agreed. And they talked a bit more and she eventually took the suitcase to give to Caveman's parents or something, and she went off in her jaguar and we all waved her off happily.
Oh and another thing, Caveman said something about splitting what's inside the suitcase with Zero, cos he helped him find it. Something about treasure from Kissin' Kate Barlow, you know that outlaw who used to roam around Texas?
We didn't get it either, but then again, it doesn't concern us. And we were still celebrating the downfall of CGL!
Andii, this is one really long letter. My hand hurts. A testament to how much I want to explain things to you. So be happy!
The Warden, Mr. Sir and Mum got pulled off elsewhere... jail, I heard. Dunno why, really. They're not… that bad.
Anyway, now the AG's taken over the camp and we're all having a blast over here! Everyone's really excited about going back home too. I caught X-Ray looking at a photograph of him and his parents when he was ten. Caveman and Zero were supposed to go back with Ms. Monkey (Zero too because, for some reason, the camp's lost his files about him so he technically doesn't exist) but they're staying with us until camp officially shuts down.
There are just a few problems, though, because some of the guys don't really have anywhere to go back to. Zero, for one, he was living on the streets when he was arrested. Did you know that? Man... that lil guy doesn't deserve the life he's got. And Zig, his old foster parents don't want anything to do with him. But there's good news too, like X-Ray, which I've already told you about, and Armpit mumbled something about "his mother" and "apology". And at any rate, the AG and his workers are all working on getting homes for Zig and Zero (Caveman offered him to stay with him and his family - nice kid, that Caveman) and yeah, it's all good. Or it will be.
I've never seen these guys happier, it really makes me smile. Well 'lil girl, I hope you're happy too. So really, how was your day?
Haha, I miss you too, princess, and you can make me do a lot of things but I will not play match maker.
Love, Squid.
We're so thankful to you for your generous gifts this past holiday season and throughout the year.
THANK YOU!
Dear Lil Gal/Chicka,
Sorry about the card - Magnet nicked it from Mr. Sir's office yonks ago, and it's the only thank you card we've got. Anyway, just wanted to say
T
H
A
N
K
Y
O
U!
You rule, Lil Girl! We still can't believe you got them to close the camp down! We take back whatever we may have said about you being a klutz (well, you still are, says your lover-boy) and a total ditz! Haha, you rock our socks. :) We LOVE YOU! And we miss you heaps, but don't worry, we'll see you soon.
too much love to be contained in this card,
X-RAY.
armpit
ZiG-zAg
ZERO
Caveman
magnet
Squid.
Dear Mum,
You've probably heard by now that the camp I'm at is closing down soon, so I'm gonna be home earlier than planned. And... I'm sorry I took off without saying goodbye. Say hi to Lukie for me and tell him his big bro's coming back soon. I love you Mum.
From Theodore.
Dearest Squid,
Oh, my day was normal. We have to read a book called To Kill A Mockingbird and write an essay on it. It's painful.
Wow, I CAN'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING THAT'S HAPPENED! That's amazing! And thanks for the large spaces - if it weren't for them I'd probably have fainted. Well, I'm really glad that everything's good now. What are you guys doing then if you're not digging holes?
HOT DOGS? That's not fair! The best dinner I ever got at CGL was those chicken and vegetable pies. Hmph.
So the three amigos were sent to jail? Holy cow! They must hate me now. I never meant for them to get arrested… In fact, my reports on them weren't that bad. I wrote useless stuff, like how Mr. Sir doesn't shave often enough.
So huh? How was that criminal?
Ooh, I've heard of KKB... she used to kiss her victims. That treasure thing with Caveman's is a little mysterious, like something out of a story book, but I'm really glad he's got it. He and Zero deserve it.
Hehe, the thank you card you guys sent me was beautiful. A picture of a cow and everything. Spiffing. :)
Hey... you've told me about Zig and X and stuff, but what about you? Are you going back to live with your mum?
I'm sorry I can't write you a longer and better letter... I'm tired and I really want to send this to you so I can see your writing again. (Yes, that is the extent to which I miss you.) I wish I was back at CGL, to tell you the truth, sounds like you're having a ball... without me... SNIFF. I miss all of you so, so, so much. There's too much love in this letter as well!
I found this quote. I found it confusing yet amusing. Prepare for some major head-spinning!
'To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness.' - Woody Allen.
Love, Andii.
MAGNET! OVER HERE! ON YOUR PILLOW! IT'S A NOTE FOR YOU! YUP!
Hey Mag. I took your soap cuz I lost mine. Hope ya don't mind.
peace, pit.
Dear Claude,
Welly welly, I finally got to meet the infamous Miss Claudette Chang. Ha, it was nice to finally meet you and to see how much you lied to me in your letters. No kidding; you wrote in one of your first letters that you were a "fat, ugly, little pimpled girl with a secret love for comics and collecting buttons." That was just to make me stop writing to you, wasn't it? Haha.
And hey, why'd you get so angry at me for? I just told Bounce to lay off; don't tell me you liked the way he was looking at you. For a fat, ugly, pimpled little girl, a lot of the guys sure were checking you out a lot and I made them stop. Still angry?
Love, Seb.
Dearest 'lil girl,
Nice quote. I miss you, too… Cannot believe I wrote that. Don't show anyone, yeah? Only for your eyes.
We took a photo for you, though. It's only just developed and one of our rare copies so treasure it.
Yeah, we're all wearing brown paper bags on our head. Thanks to Zig. But other than that, it's a nice photo.
It's funny that you asked where I'm going to go, because the AG just called me into his (used to be Mr. Sir's) office and had a little talk with me. They can't find my mum. She's disappeared. Probably run off with her newest boyfriend… He asked me if I had any other relatives, and obviously I don't. So they're looking for a foster family for me, but their hopes aren't high because they've been looking for foster families for a lot of other guys, and to be honest no one really wants to adopt a teenage juvenile delinquent.
We're really busy now, doing all sorts of activities. Well, we're doing cooking (shut up) and other recreational stuff, like all these games that build up our general ability and whatnot. It's kind of hard to explain. But it's awesome. Beats digging, anyhow.
Don't study too hard, 'lil girl. Wouldn't want you to stress out. How's little Cecily doing? And your parents? They were cool people, especially your dad.
Anyway, really need to go. Take care of yourself because I'm all the way over here and can't do it for you.
Love, Squid.
Dearest Theodore,
You have no idea how happy it made me to see your writing again. I've missed you so much, sweetheart. Lukie and I are overjoyed to hear you are coming home very soon. I think you'll be glad to hear that I've stopped seeing Jeremy. For several months, actually. I hope you're doing well. I'm really sorry now that I haven't written to you at all. I've been so stubborn. We've both been so stubborn. I can't believe it was you who stopped this nonsense. It shows I haven't really grown up, right? But you have. You're so mature now, Theodore. It brings tears to my eyes to realise how much you've grown up. I remember when you were still a little toddler, you came up to me and said that you wanted -
(this letter goes on and on, but it's really boring)
I love you, Theodore my darling. You are my heart, my soul and my joy.
Lots of love, Mum.
Mood: sleepy/relieved
Time: 10:01pm
Dear Diary,
Haven't heard from me in awhile, have ya? :) I'm dead on my feet with all the homework I've got. Anyway, about Squiddy and the rest of them. I talked to my mum about that. She says she'll sort it out. My mum is great. Ugh... I'm so tiredddddddddd
Andii! There's a note on the fridge for you!
Morning, sleepy-head! There's pancakes in the microwave for you, if you want. I've taken Leelee out to the beach, if you wanna join us just walk by and you'll find us... probably building a sandcastle. Otherwise, we'll be back by midday with some lunch. Anyway, about what you told me last night, I talked to your father about it. We're planning to visit dear old Charlie and Christina Smith tonight to talk to them about it. They're wonderful people, I'm sure everything will go well. By the way, don't drink the milk inside here; it's expired.
Mum xoxo.
From: Claudette WS Chang
Sent: Saturday, 5:34 PM
To: andii
Subject: (none)
Hello my friend. I'm so bored and… kind of fuming. Because Seb had the nerve to continue writing to me! And to make matters worse, his letter was like five lines long. I am not replying to that thing.
He is kinda cute, though, isn't he? Oh, NO. I will not think about him. I'm going to call you now.
s2 claude.
Dear Seb,
I'm not sure if you're complimenting me or not by calling me a liar, but I do have a secret love for collecting buttons and comics. So there.
And you do not OWN me! You had no right to yell at those guys and say that I'm yours. I mean, WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?
UNfaithfully,
Claude.
Dear Andii,
Hey... I haven't heard from you in awhile. You're not angry at me, are you? Please don't... I'm sorry! Seb over here is all annoyed and heartbroken cos your bestie is being a bit rude to him. Now, I met her and I liked her and everything, but Claude can be a little… stubborn. Still, I think she's cool. Tell her to forgive Seb for whatever stupid thing he's done, cos he's starting to annoy me.
We had a really good day today. We had to do this thing where we stacked as many crates on top of each other to make the highest tower. It was mad. Zigzag and I almost won, but Zero and Caveman managed to put one more crate on top of theirs before it all collapsed. So they won. Tcah.
Still no luck with a foster family for me, but I didn't expect anything else. Zig's good, though. They've got a really nice couple who are willing to take him in, and they've already got two adopted kids so that should be good. Zig's good with kids, contrary to belief. They like his imagination. Zero's staying with Caveman's family, they said it's fine. It's only temporary. Zero said something about finding his mother. Do you know where his parents are?
X, Pit and Magnet are all fit to go back home to their families. Magnet got sent a bunch of flowers from his adoring sisters. Heh - he went full red when he saw them, but we know he loves it. We paid him out for the rest of the week, though. They're all so excited about going back home. I'm not sure... I've been happiest here at camp, to tell you the truth.
Please reply soon. I've missed seeing your writing.
Love, Squid.
From: Andromeda Williams
Sent: Sunday, 7:23 PM
To: Claudey
Subject: :O
OMO! My parents talked to Squid's grandparents, and - OH MY GOSH! They are SO happy to hear about him! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! They cannot wait to see him again. AHHH! I'm screaming with happiness over here! I'm gonna write a letter to him now! I'm online, but where are you? Hmmm? See, Cupidette has prevailed. I didn't have to do anything and you admit you luff Seb. Ngaww. Love eez een zee airrr.
c5 andii.
DEAR ALAN!
What do you mean, you don't have any other relatives?
YOUR GRANDPARENTS! THE ONES LIVING IN PAL! THE ONES WHO'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR YOU FOR OVER TEN YEARS! THE ONES WHO ARE ECSTATIC TO HAVE FINALLY FIND YOU, AND WHO ARE PERFECTLY WILLING AND HAPPY TO TAKE YOU INTO THEIR HOME AND SPOIL YOU STUPID!
Yes, Squid, you have a home.
Near me. :)
OKAY.
HERE'S YOUR SPACE!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Don't pass out! Still more writing to come!
I told my mum and she took matters into her own hands. She and my dad went to visit your grandparents, had some tea and biscuits, and SHA ZAAM. The rest, they say, is history. They're so happy to know where you are, though, of course, not that pleased to hear you're in a correctional facility. But they're still really glad to know you're... well... alive. They want to know where your father is, too, but I guess there's no luck there.
Don't worry about a thing, because they've contacted the AG and everything and made sure he knows that you don't need a foster family anymore. :) This is crazy, eh?
Here's some more space.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
That was sweet of you to write a second letter! No, I'm not angry at you. I wanted to wait for my parents' responses before writing to you again. Firstly, I love the photo. I love it so much I've framed it and put it on my bedside table, so every morning I wake up to your sweet faces and paper bags.
Cecily's great. She's always asking about you and the other guys. I think she has some sort of little girl crush on you. Well you're MINE. :)
And the parentals are great too. Daddy's euphoric because his favourite football team won the grand finals. He keeps parading around the house wearing his football jersey, roaring some obscure war cry.
Hmm... no luck with Seb there. According to Claude, he made it seem like he owns her. Claude hates being classified as someone's 'property'. She's very independent. So… either Seb grovels, or she's gonna hold a grudge for the rest of her life. So go wish Seb good luck. Hehe.
We did that crate thing at camp a year ago. It was pretty scary. We had to wear helmets and everything in case they fell on our heads. Anyway, none of us got a concussion so what a waste of time.
I'm really glad that they've all got homes to go back to, especially Zig and Zero. Tell them I said hi and give them all a big hug for me! (But if you don't want to, that's okay. The hug, I mean. You've got to say hi.)
Aww... Squid, have you ever told them that you've been happiest with them? I think you should... you're all going your separate ways soon.
Lots of love, Andii.
Dear ANDROMEDA,
You are amazing and I love you. Did I ever tell you that?
I completely forgot about my grandparents. My grandparents. Whoa… that sounds weird.
It was so strange. I got called into the AG's office again, and I thought maybe they'd found a family for me. Well, turns out they did, but not exactly what I expected.
When I see you I'm gonna give you the hugest hug ever! (Again, this letter is for your eyes only.)
Tell your parents THANKS A MILLION as well.
Anyway... my grandparents called last night to talk to me. It was so... weird. I mean, I've never met them before. Well, I guess I have… and they did sound a little familiar... but I dunno. It's all a blur. These memories are so distant I didn't even think they were real. I've forgotten everything about my childhood.
My grandmother was crying... it was pretty bad. But I dunno – it hurt me too. Yeah and it feels so weird calling them my grandparents. They're next to total strangers to me. They did keep asking about my dad, but I couldn't tell them much. They sounded really heartbroken but happy at the same time... kept saying how much they loved me, and all that stuff. It was really embarrassing. But I dunno... I liked it. So this is what it's like to have a family, huh?
Wait... I just thought of something. If they live in Palmoilin... and I'm to live with them...
Holy cow.
This is nuts.
I guess you're stuck with me now, 'lil girl. Heh.
Sent the boy their hi's and - err - virtual hugs. No, I haven't told them. You wouldn't understand, it's just not something a guy would do.
Miss you, Squid.
From: Claudette WS Chang
Sent: Wednesday, 9:56 AM
To: andii
Subject: hmmm?
Commerce is such a bludge. And Di, love eez een zee air? What's wrong with you, woman? I'm happy for Squid though. Don't scream too much with happiness, dearie. If he finds out how much you love him, he'll have you wrapped around his little finger forever. And I won't be able to help you there.
And I don't like Seb. Where did that come from? Where are all these wild assumptions coming from? Ugh… Di… help me!
s2 claude.
Dear Claude,
I'm so very very sorry for saying that. I know you're not owned by anyone, the words just came out that way! I didn't like the way he was looking at you – is that so bad? I got angry. And I wanted to protect you. But my words came all jumbled up in my righteous anger. Forgive me yet? Anyway, I'm really sorry. Really.
You can't stay mad at me after this.
Love, Seb.
Dear Claude,
I said I'm sorry! What more do you want me to do?
Love, Seb.
CLAUDE
STOP IGNORING ME YOU LITTLE SNOB! I ALREADY SAID I WAS SORRY, WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? WHY ARE YOU BEING SO HARSH FOR? YOU'RE THE MOST STUBBORN GIRL I'VE MET.
SEB.
From: Andromeda Williams
Sent: Monday, 4:30 PM
To: Claudey
Subject: hehe
Hello dearie. :) Just got off the phone with you; you sound sooo sick. Runny nose and everything, you poor thing! Well anyway, I forgot to tell you I got your letters from school... and you really should stop being sick, Seb seems kinda mad. Reply to him, okay? You are really being harsh to this poor boy. Luff is a cool word... but it's still stupid. And c5 is just to make fun of the stupid s2. Get well soon my sick sister.
c5 andii.
ARMPIT! OVER HERE! ON YOUR TOWEL! IT'S A NOTE FOR YOU! YUP!
YOU OWE ME SOAP.
espagnol pride, magnet.
Dear ALAN,
Don't call me Andromeda again. I will have to kill you.
Anyway, HI. I'm glad to be of service. :) That's so sweet how they called you and everything! And she was crying? They must really love you. They're really happy. I saw them in the shopping mall today.
I thanked my parents for you. They say it's fine. My dad hinted heavily that one day when you inherit the fortune that he likes flashy, silver sports cars. Mum told him to shut up.
My parents are odd. I guess that's how I come in.
Claude is really sick. She's got the flu and has missed out on a week of school. Tell Seb that, will you? Though she'll probably be better by the time this reaches you. But tell him that's why she hasn't replied. And tell him to stop being so mean to her! He didn't have to go and start yelling at her and calling her a little snob.
How are you and the rest of my favourite D-tent-cabin doing? And you should tell them, you know. But yeah, you are a guy, and I will never understand your race.
Mum, Cecily and I made Mars Bar slice yesterday. Here's a piece for you; it's the tastiest Mars Bar slice in the history of the universe. On second thoughts, I'll wrap it up in glad wrap so this letter won't be covered in chocolate. WBASAP.
Love, Andii.
PS. Give the card to Caveman. It's a little late, hehe, but I didn't realise until... a day ago.
BEST WISHES ON YOUR BIRTHDAY
Dear Caveman,
Hey dude! Sorry this is a bit late. :) Well, happy birthday! Hope you're chirpy and sane as usual.
Love, Andii.
My Dearest Stanley,
We're all very disappointed that you're not home yet, but we understand that you wish to remain with your newfound friends a little longer. I'm so happy for you, Stanley! Ms. Morengo told us everything and she also officially and legally gave us the suitcase. It belonged to your great-grandfather, Stanley Yelnats the first! I'm still a bit hazy on the exact details, but your father and grandfather will tell you when you come home. Your father opened the suitcase up and it contains jewels and these stock market deeds - worth quite a bit today! Once Ms. Morengo and her firm sort it out, we'll divide the money in half for your friend, Hector Zeroni. He does sound like a sweet boy, I'll be very glad to allow him room in our house.
Your father wants me to ask you what he should name the new product he's invented (Ms. Morengo says she has told you about the food-odour spray). I have enclosed a sample of the spray in this envelope. Please do try and think up of a name - your father is so elated about his new product that he can barely calm down and come up with a flashy and appropriate title for it.
We're looking forward to the day when you and your friend return. I hope Camp Green Lake has continued to treat you well. Remember to wear your hat and apply lots of sunscreen when you're outdoors!
Lots of love, your mother.
PS. Happy birthday! There's a card in here from your father and grandpa too, and we'll have a nice proper party once you and your friend are home!
SEB
I HAD THE COLD. I HAVE THE COLD. I'M SO SICK AND ABOUT TO DIE TRYING TO WRITE THIS. I CAN BARELY BREATHE. YOU ARE AWFUL, SEB, NEVER WRITE TO ME AGAIN.
Okay, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I wrote that last night and fortunately abstained from sending it this morning. Now I have calmed down.
I'm feeling a bit better now, so I'm going to write this properly. Seb, I hate it when people act like they own me. And I didn't need you to come to my rescue, like a knight in shining armour, because I can take care of myself. Do I seem all weak and damsel-in-distress-ish? Because if I do, you are delusional.
Sorry I've been so mean. And remember I hardly ever apologise, much less in writing which I can't take back, so you should keep this letter for eternity and frame it or something.
I'm sending you a piece of Mars Bar slice my best friend made the other day and gave to me. I can't eat it if I don't want to choke to death, so I'm giving it to you. I love Mars Bar slice and this piece looks particularly tasty, so you should appreciate my thoughtfulness. Okay, that's it for now. Bye bye Seb.
Luv and tissues,
Claude.
Claudey –
Hiya! It looks like you're about to fall asleep so hopefully this note will wake you up. You still look awfully sick - maybe you should've stayed home again. How did things go with Seb?
c5 Andii.
Di –
I wanted to, but mum wouldn't let me.
He groveled. I forgave him. :) Nah, he's a nice boy. Teases me and everything, but he's sweet.
s2 claude.
PS. COULD MR. SNG BE ANYMORE MEAN? MY FIRST DAY BACK AND HE HANDS OUT A FIVE-TASK ASSIGNMENT. NOOOO!
ARMPIT AND MAGNET. OVER HERE. YUP, THAT'S RIGHT, ON MY FOREHEAD.
WHERE'D YOU GET THESE PINK POST-IT NOTES?
X-RAY.
Dear Mum,
Hi! Everything's fine here as usual. I gotta make this quick – in the middle of baking cookies! Anyway, Dad's foot odour stuff smells good. Tangy, like spiced peaches. My friend Zero (Hector) reckons you should call it Sploosh. I was a bit stumped at first, but you've got to admit, it has a nice ring to it.
Uh oh, our oven's starting to smoke – bye Mum!
Love, your son Stanley.
Dear Andromeda,
I insist on calling you Andromeda until you stop calling me Alan. You're right, that Mars Bars slice really was the tastiest I've ever had. I never knew you could cook. It's really weird how you sent me that, because today we baked chocolate-chip cookies. I'll send you a couple. I don't have any glad wrap so I'm just gonna put this in a separate envelope and sticky tape it onto this.
There have been tons of phone calls and a lot more mail these days. Family. All really anxious to hear how their "little ones" are doing, just cos now they're all coming home soon. It's weird. I mean, they didn't bother while they had just started to come to camp, but they do now just as they're about to go back. I'm so cynical.
We're all good, as usual. Camp's a lot of fun without the Warden and her evil accomplices, though... I do kinda miss them. Really, they weren't that bad. Maybe the AG doesn't like people who don't shave? No stubble on that man's chin, I can tell you that.
I'd buy your dad that sports car of his even if it costs me an arm and a leg. Unfortunately, at the rate I'm going, if I sold my entire body and everything that I own, all he'd get is probably a tyre and a power window.
Great. I just unintentionally degraded myself.
Your parents are great. You should be glad you have them. I'd kill to have parents like yours. Well, not really. But I would give an arm and a leg, which should tell you a lot.
They're setting up a temporary flying fox for us! It's going to be heaps fun - we can't wait to see lil Zero go on it. Imagine seeing that afro whizzing past in the air! Hahaha. Wish you were still here; it'd be awesome entertainment to see you scream your head off.
Anyway, I told Seb about Claude. He seized up and went all, "She's sick?" And then ran off to his cabin. I don't get that guy sometimes. I saw him this morning, though, and he was all happy because he's gotten a letter from her and it was nice and long and she said sorry. So yeah. He plans to not reply for a couple of days, just to torment her. Maybe you should tell her that, so she doesn't chuck a hissy fit and then he gets all annoyed and starts the whole thing again. If that happens, I need a new hiding place.
Caveman says thank you HEAPS HEAPS HEAPS for the card. Yikes. I didn't know it was his birthday.
Yeah, well, you're a girl and I will never understand your race.
I miss you princess. Why can't you dress up as a boy and steal a lifetime supply of gummi bears so I can see you again?
Love, Squid.
PS. What is "WBASAP"?
X-RAY! OVER HERE! YOU HAVE A NOTE! ON YOUR CRATE!
I could hardly miss that big note on your forehead asking where the post-its came from. I... borrowed them from the 'lil girl when she was still here. Aren't they neat?
Squid.
Dear Mister Alan Smith,
As Mr Pendanski repeatedly said, my dear one, you're going to have to get used to the name SOCIETY will recognise you by. Because it's also what your grandparents are going to recognise you by. And they are not going to call you Squid.
And ARE YOU TRYING TO POISON ME? Those cookies were disgusting. I gave them to my dog, Popeye. I tried to convince Cecily to have some too, but she seemed to gather the worst when I choked violently and spat out my first bite.
But don't feel bad or anything. :) You can't be as good as me at everything, can you? I jest, I jest, Squiddy. Don't cry. :)
My parents are really great and I love them, especially when I see Claude's family. I mean, her parents are both very nice people, but not exactly a family-couple, if you understand? Her mum is a fashion designer who's forever on the phone with big companies in Tokyo and Hong Kong. And her dad is the CEO of another huge Japanese industry and he's not around as much as he should be.
I shouldn't have told you that. Don't tell anyone, okay? Claude is okay with it, but I know she misses them.
A FLYING FOX? I LOVE FLYING FOXES! AHHH I WISH I WAS STILL AT CGL!
I've got to go now and help make dessert. Any ideas what I can make? Not like you can get them to me fast enough, but still...
Quickly now, WBASAP stands for: write back as soon as possible. Neat, eh?
Love, Andii.
Dear Claude,
Way to make me feel bad, Claude. I hope you're feeling a lot better now – but I had no idea, so you can't stay too angry at me again, can you? Anyway, sorry for going crazy in the last letter. I thought you were giving me the silent treatment. I don't mind you yelling at me so much, but I hate it when people ignore me. But yeah, I'm sorry, and thanks for the slice. It tasted pretty good.
However, I have to say – YOU APOLOGISED? I can't believe it. You seem so above that.
I know you're not the damsel-in-distress type... it's just that I'm a guy, and guys feel the need to defend or protect the people they care about. Well, at least decent guys do. Get what I'm saying? I mean take Squid for example. (Guy who's with your friend Andii - I'm sure not even you can be that oblivious.) He beat up three dudes from B-tent for calling her trash and stuff. You don't see her chucking a fit. (Please don't get mad.)
Hey, so you know how CGL's closing down really soon? Well, that means I'm going back home. But that won't change anything, right? We'll still write to each other, won't we?
I've gotta run now - it's my group's turn to go on the flying fox they newly installed for us. Yeah, I'm probably gonna hurl afterwards. I know that would make you laugh.
Sleep well tonight and make sure you don't get sick again; I still dunno why I care, but I obviously do, so be happy about it. Heh.
Love, Seb.
YO! D-TENT! OVER HERE! ON MY FOREHEAD (YET AGAIN)! IT'S A NOTE FOR YOU DUDES. ALRIGHT.
Sup, dudes? We're gonna do this nice thing for each other cuz we're all going our separate ways soon.
And cuz I said so.
WE ARE GOING TO WRITE 3 NICE THINGS AND 3 MEMORIES OF ONE PERSON OF D-TENT. You get to choose who you want to write about. The last person will have to write about me (a privilege, really) cuz I'm starting. Once you get a note, you have to thank the person who sent you it and then draw a big 'L' on your forehead (that doesn't wash off) so future people will know not to write about you, since you already received one.
You don't understand?
Maybe my fist will help.
Just kidding.
Kinda.
X-RAY.
ZERO! there's a note hidden under your pillow.
nice things
1. loyal
2. listens
3. best at digging
memories
1. being totally silent until Caveman and the 'lil gal came along
2. crushing that spider (yeah, still remember that)
3. finding that wicked suitcase full of 'treasure'
will miss ya heaps, Zee.
X.
Dear Andromeda,
Make chocolate-chip cookies for dessert and send one to me! They can't be any better than mine. Besides, Zig says ours tasted fine, so what's up with your taste-buds?
Wow... Claude's parents sound like the type to have kids who end up in these correctional places. You know, they start rebelling to get attention and cos they feel unloved, and become a little 'delinquent' in the process. Not that Claude will; did you see the look on her face when she saw the condition of our pool table? And I promise I won't tell anyone. I'm good at keeping secrets.
The flying fox was awesome. Seriously. At first Magnet fully freaked out – turns out he has an intense fear of heights. HAHAHA. Isn't that funny? But it was cool cos he went from completely terrified to completely… well, Magnet-like as he zoomed down. It took us ten minutes to convince him to go on though.
We're getting closer to coming back home.
That's kinda scary.
X-Ray's making us do this new thing where we pick a member of D-tent and write nice things about them. I haven't been picked yet. Sniff.
I'm tired now. Zig says hi and sends you a hug and a metal rod. Err... no, I'm not going to put it in this letter. You'll just have to imagine it. I still miss you, but I suppose writing to you helps eases that… a little. Is that what a guy's supposed to write without sounding too corny?
Love, Squid.
Andii! There's a note on the fridge for you!
Morning sweetie! I took your sister out to have waffles for breakfast. I tried waking you up, too. Do you remember hitting someone in your dream? Well, that wasn't a dream. Anyway, I've made eight copies of the photos, just like you asked, and I also bought eight photo albums for you. They're on the counter, along with the photos. Have fun filling them up! Have cereal for breakfast; the good-for-nothing toaster has malfunctioned. It is now in the bin. Don't touch it.
Mum xoxo.
Stanley, (I don't know why everyone does this but they all write where the note is. So... there's a note in my hand that I'm passing to you)
nice things
1. patient
2. really caring and nice
3. non-judgemental
memories
1. teaching me to read and write
2. finding that suitcase with you
3. being my first friend
Thanks!
ZERO.
Dear Seb,
Yeah, I'm fine now. And I can't believe I apologised either. Do you see what you're making me become? It's groundbreaking, so I hope my last letter's framed up on your living room wall.
Seb, has anyone ever told you that you're pretty hard to stay mad at? It's quite an enormous feat because when people get angry at me, they always say it's the easiest thing in the world to stay angry. But you… you with your subtle care and chivalrous, manly defensiveness makes it very hard and makes me feel bad, therefore making me write out an apology which is now framed above your mantelpiece.
Heh, sorry for rambling. But thanks for the letter Seb and I hope you didn't hurl on the flying fox.
But then again, I don't care right? ;)
It won't change anything, you baka. We'll keep writing; the joy of the pen and envelope indeed. I believe I owe my English teacher. But you'll need to write me your home address. Hey... on that thought, why don't you give me your email and number as well? Letters are fun and all, but we might as well make use of our technologically advanced age, right? I'll give you my details and ring me sometime when you're back home, okay?
You better stay out of trouble from now on!
And Seb… you have nice eyes.
Haha, catch ya later.
Luv,
Claude.
Magnet - hey, there's a note on your bed
nice things
1. loyal
2. submissive
3. all-round nice guy
memories
1. your Spanish pride
2. always trying to move up in the water line
3. the story of how you got arrested ("my pocket started barking!")
Stay outta trouble, buddy.
Caveman.
Dear Alan,
Yup, there's a big fat parcel awaiting you. Inside are seven photo albums; they're full of the pictures I took with my camera. There's one for each of you D-tent delinquents (it's a term of endearment, not meant to be condescending) and tell them to TAKE CARE OF IT OR ELSE. I hope it helps you all remember CGL, each other and, of course, moi. :) Oh, and I also sent a bag of mixed party lollies. Leftovers from our sleepover last night. Share it with each other and enjoy the sugar!
I'm off choc-chip cookies for now. Just the thought of them makes me feel nauseous. My taste-buds are fine, I think we all know whose taste-buds are whacked-up in this situation.
Only a fortnight till it's time to go home, right? And writing nice things about each other! That is the SWEETEST thing ever. You see, that kind of behaviour makes me love you guys. Mr. Pendanski was right – you guys are a big bunch of soft toys!
I find it cute that Magnet's afraid of heights. Shows even toughy Espagnol guys have their weaknesses, too. Speaking of tough guys, my science teacher is the dullest man to walk the planet. He looks all bulky and muscly and like he could take you out by waving 'hello', but he talks in this monotone-about-the-electrons-and-the-neutrons-and-the-protons-and-it's-killing-me.
Tell Zig I say hi back! Give him a hug for me as well.
Uh oh, time for worksheets about the Almighty Atom. The letter ends here. Back to you!
Love, Andii.
(PS. Sorry my writing's so messy and tiny here, I'm trying to hide the fact that I'm writing this. STOP CALLING ME ANDROMEDA.)
ZIGZAG! You know the drill, there's a note in your hair.
nice things
1. you're crazy (in the completely healthy way)
2. humble
3. loyal
memories
1. chasing the 'lil chicka with a shovel across the desert
2. your hectic hair
3. all the 'Alien' stuff (yeah, they are nasty creatures)
Blergh... stupid X, why the hell do we have to write an 'L' on our forehead? All the other tent dudes keep looking at me, Caveman and Zero as if we're nuts... Anyway, stay cool Zig.
magnet.
From: Claudette WS Chang
Sent: Thursday, 8:21PM
To: andii
Subject: MISS ELUSIVE!
HI ANDII. I KNOW YOU'RE APPEARING OFFLINE. I AM TOO. SO COME ONLINE, NOW, COZ I AM IN A SECOND.
By the way, have I ever told you how your eyes glint in the sun as though stars were lighting up in the mysterious brown and emerald pools? HAHA! Di, you're the BEST BEST BEST friend I could ever ask for and if you ever leave me for a month again I won't survive.
I love you.
s2 claude.
From: Andromeda Williams
Sent: Thursday, 8:24PM
To: Claudey
Subject: RE: MISS ELUSIVE!
Claudette Chang, how DARE you appear offline… as well! Haha, coming right on ma'am. In five minutes.
My poetic compadre, you are not merely my friend, tomodachi, amigo and ami, you are my sister.
I love you more.
c5 andii.
I'm all smiles...
Merci, Danke, Gracias
Geez, 'lil gal, you sure make us thank you a lot. Anyway, this card is so cheesy and the bear on the front is a fat-arse. Who the heck has cheeks as rosy as that? Pfft. Well anyway, just wanted to thank you for the photo albums. They're... really nice. Hold on, Magnet wants the pen now.
SUP CHICKA? HOW ARE YOU? ESPAGNOL PRIDE! The photos rock. I like the one where we're all holding you down haha. I remember that. Good memories, eh? Well, stay cool 'lil chicka! Miss you heaps! - magnet
So anyway - Oh, I don't believe this. Now Caveman wants the pen. Actually, you'll hear from me at the end (if they don't all use up the space - WRITE SMALLER AND DON'T BABBLE) since now they're all forming a queue to write.
Hi Andii! Thanks for the b'day card and the photo album and the candy of course. (How could you guys forget the candy?) X says we can't write too much so BYE! - Caveman.
Hey Princ-
GO AWAY SQUID, YOU'VE BEEN WRITING SQUILLIONS OF LETTERS TO HER ALREADY. QUIT HOGGING THE 'LIL GIRL! HI 'LIL GIRL! HOPE YOU LIKED MY METAL ROD. AND THE ALBUM RULES I'M GOING TO LOCK IT IN MY SAFE! KEEP AWAY FROM ALIENS! - ZiG-zAg.
Yo chicka! It's Pit here. The lollies were FABULOUS! Thanks chicka! You're the best out there and we all miss you! - armpit.
Hey Andii! It's really strange without you here, but we're all coping. But the photo album was really thoughtful... thank you so much! Alright, I gotta hand the pen back to X-Ray now. Bye bye! - ZERO.
Far out... leave me this miniscule space to write, why don't you all? Well thanks a bunch 'lil gal, we couldn't have done it without ya! ("Done what?") Everything! Okay... I really need to end this now, CYA GIRLIE!
No matter how I say it, it's straight from my heart!
THANKS!
Love, D-tent.
PIT MY BOY! HERE'S A NOTE, ON YOUR CRATE, FROM THE ALIENS!
Jokes, man, it's from me. :D
nice thingies 'bout the Pitmeister
1. not a picky eater
2. LOYAL
3. GREAT at dancing
4. yeah you get a fourth one you party animal! YOU'RE THE BEST DUDE OUT THERE!
MY MEMORIES OF ARMPIT
1. DANCING KING
2. HAVING EATING COMPS
3. BEING COOL
GO PIT! YOU RULE!
ZiG-zAg!
PS. I GET TO HAVE AN 'L' ON MY FOREHEAD NOW. WHOO-HOO!
Dear Princess,
There. I stopped addressing you as Andromeda. Are you happy? There's a card in here, another thank you one from the guys. They wouldn't let me write in it, isn't that terribly prejudiced? But yeah, those albums really are very thoughtful and priceless. We're all in love them. If there was a fire, it'd be the first thing I grab before I esca-pay!
Finding Nemo is my best friend.
Oh, and the candy was delicious. I only had a couple of snakes though; Armpit devoured about half the pack before we even realised it existed, no kidding.
Hmph. Fine, continue dissing my cookies. But they are the best, everyone knows that!
I still haven't gotten a nice-note yet, but I'm kinda glad as well, because once you receive a note and write one for another person, you have to draw an 'L' on your forehead and walk around with it. How crazy is that? Pretty amusing to see them all walking around with LOSER clearly stated, though.
Well... only a week left now. Don't let them catch you calling them soft toys; they might attack you with hugs. And let me tell you, their hugs ain't pretty. Well, I guess you've already hugged them, but still.
Good luck on those worksheets. I talked to my grandparents the day before yesterday. They wanted to know which colour is my favourite. It was strange, coz I don't think anyone's ever asked that before. Like nobody cared. And it's weird that somebody does now.
STEAL THOSE GUMMI BEARS ALREADY!
Love, Squid.
SQUIDDY, there's a note hidden in your hat.
nice things
1. you're one of the most loyal buddies I've ever had
2. good self-esteem
3. humorous/sarcastic
memories
1. having the only nickname in D-tent which I don't get
2. that friggin' toothpick
3. you and the 'lil chicka (haha, you two are so cute and ballistic together)
Peace out, Squid.
armpit.
PS. What's with the 'L' thing? I can't believe X is making us do this, we're actually announcing it at large that we are LOSERS. Which we're NOT.
Dear King Alan,
I thought I'd call you king since that's how they used to address your grandparents. The Royal Majesty Charlie and Christina. Haha.
And no, I will not steal any gummi bears because I'm not a criminal. Besides, you're coming back in four days which means this is certainly the last letter I am going to be sending to you. Say thank you to D-tent for me, and tell them I love them very much. I can't believe CGL is closing down, actually. It's... frightening, almost. Well, I wish the guys all the best in their lives, and we've got to get together some day. Like a D-tent reunion or something.
Hey Squid? I need to tell you something a bit more serious. People here are getting ready for you to come back and… they're not exactly happy. They still haven't forgiven your mum for destroying what would have been "a respectable and loving household that would have benefited the community mutually." And hence they're not exactly fond of the idea of you returning, especially since you're coming from a juvenile camp.
But don't worry! Cos we've got your back – me, your grandparents of course (which will win over the nation, everyone loves them), my family and even Claude (and we all know how hard she is to please). In short, don't fret too much about it, because Palmoilin people have their noses THIS far up in the air and they need something of catastrophic proportions to bring it down. I mean, our neighbours are always (nicely) saying that it's such a pity that Cecily and I aren't any taller.
I mean, come on, Cecily is only five-years-old!
PFFT.
I hope you've gotten your nice-note by now, so you can draw a nice, lovely, big 'L' on your forehead, where it belongs. Tell Zig to take a picture and send it to me! It will make me smile whenever I feel like frowning.
You're right; THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THEIR HUGS. So go tell them that they are big softies so I can get some hugs. I really miss hanging around all of you. Those were the days.
Right, well I guess that's it for now, Squid. Keep your head up and don't walk into anything! By the way, what is your favourite colour?
Love, Andii.
X-RAY! YOU HAVE A NOTE! ON YOUR FOREHEAD! YUP! I hope you don't get too angry at me for sticking it there.
nice things
1. natural leader
2. brainiac who knows how to keep people in order and together
3. defensive and loyal
memories
1. those bug-eyed glasses, man
2. that really scary glare... I call it the Premature Heart Attack Glare
3. making us write these nice note things and then drawing an 'L' on our own forehead... geez, only you could make people do that
You're the best, X. Cheers.
Squid.
TO D-TENT AT LARGE:
WHOOO, YOU GUYS DID IT! YOU SUCCEEDED AT BEING NICE TO EACH OTHER! CONGRATS!
And sorry about the 'L' thing. I thought it would do some good to humble you guys a bit. Heh. You can wash it off now, by the way. Well... you dudes are the best friends a guy could ask for, it's been fun being the 'leader', but to tell you the truth, you guys made it work, not me. We gotta stay in touch, a'ight? We can't fall apart; that would be breaking the D-tent code. So here's a spare piece of paper, everyone write down your phone number and email, and DON'T EVER FORGET THE DUDES YOU MET AT CAMP GREEN LAKE.
Peace,
X-RAY.
Dear Princess Andromeda,
Hey, I just got back from lunch. We had fish and chips. Anyway, we have free time now and everyone's in the Wreck Room. X and Magnet are playing on the pinball machine (we got that awhile ago) and – COULD THEY BE ANY NOISER? There, I just told them to shut it. Didn't work, though, 'cos X sent me one of his murderous looks so I just shut up and sat back down.
So... it's our last day today. Tomorrow morning we'll be boarding the bus back to our real lives. It doesn't seem right, in a way. My life here seems so much more real than the one I had back out there. It feels so weird to be leaving. It feels so weird to think that this is really the last day we're spending together.
We've exchanged phone numbers and emails, even Zig who had to ring up in order to find out his number. I copied an extra list and I'm sending it to you as well, so you have no excuse to forget about us!
Anyway, I told the other guys thanks for you, and they all say they love you too and they'll miss you heaps, but to keep them posted by emailing them. Thanks for the word of warning, 'lil girl. I hope they're not too mean to me; I mean, I am a potential criminal. They should all fear me. Hahahaha! You know... I wonder how my mum is. And my dad. I wonder if he is still alive. A little morbid, I know. But who knows what happens in this hectic world. He walked out so many years ago.
'Lil girl, I'm sorry if I'm treating you like you're my psychiatrist. I've been thinking a lot lately. Out loud. And in my head. The guys have listened heaps and have supported me. I think I'm ingratiating myself back into reality; being at CGL for so long has made me feel like a blur. It's been an escape and now I've gotta get used to the real world again.
"…a respectable and loving household that would have benefited the community mutually" – wow, if I had grown up in that kind of family... whoa. I can't imagine it. It's weird, 'cos I was so close to being born into that.
Thanks for the support; I feel invincible with all you behind me! And don't worry, being short is a cute thing. It made me launch into protect-and-defend mode when I first saw you. You tell those neighbours in true Andii-style to shove it up their behind, or if you like I'll do it for you.
Yeah, I got my nice-note from Armpit. It was nice, because it was honest. Well, I did have an 'L' on my forehead, but not for long. We figured out that X didn't have to write an 'L' on his forehead, because he ended the cycle. Dang. He's smart like that. We better watch out, he'll be running for President one day.
The guys all send you their love and hugs.
My favourite colour is blue. But it's got to be a specific blue. It's blue because it reminds me of the sea and the creatures inside it. Marine-life. Yeah, that's the word.
I swear, Pit is the noisiest human being to crash on this earth. He's joined them at the pinball machine and is yelling like thirty of us aren't clutching our ears in pain. Haha, and now Zig –
WHOA.
WHOA.
WHOA!
This letter is drenched right now, BUT WHOA!
Can you guess what happened?
...AHHHH!
IT STARTED RAINING.
I KNOW.
HERE'S SOME SPACE.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
RAINING!
RAINING!
RAAAININGGGG!
It is pouring outside – it's thundering – and thank the Great Ones Above that we have cabins or our tents would have washed away by now!
I was just about to write that Zig was lecturing them for playing on such a noisy machine, when all the other groups started to come in from their activities. And then the AG all made us sit at our tables in the Mess Hall, saying he had something to say to all of us.
He made a big speech about our behaviour and how we should behave in society, bla bla bla, how we've all been given a second chance and not to stuff it up, bla bla bla. Right at the very end, he said, "It's been a lot of fun, actually, taking over this camp for a short period of time and looking after you boys. So I guess it is with some regret that I must say that Camp Green Lake is now... officially closed."
And at that moment there was a huge BANG.
Naturally, everyone perked up and was like, "What was that?" and there was a bit of a scuffle. Then I heard this pattering, and I looked up and frowned, and Caveman said in a hushed voice, "It sounds like..."
A mad rush for the door occurred before he could finish his sentence. All of us tried to get outside at once.
We just STARED.
There was absolute silence for about three seconds. I cannot describe the emotions that filled that incredible silence. It was palpable. It made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.
And then, of course, we went nuts. Crazy. Insane. Hysterical. I cannot describe that scene either. It felt like my heart had grown so huge it was about to explode out of my mouth. It was just screaming and whooping and yelling and dancing and laughing in general, from every single member of CGL. I don't think I'll ever forget that moment. The rain just kept pouring down, it was a miracle.
'Lil girl, I am still in shock.
Hey, it's dinner now – I'll write more after.
Wow, what a dinner. It was more of a party. We had a buffet and I thought Pit was about to pass out from joy. There was music and balloons and party blowers and even party hats. It was awesome. Man, what a day. I'm gonna miss this place. RAIN… BUFFET DINNER… It's like a dream.
After dinner, we mucked around the Wreck Room for a bit before heading back to the cabin. I won't forget the massive conversation we just had. I can't remember half of it, but we kept on talking about everything. First impressions, past memories, our lives before CGL… whatever. I really am gonna miss these guys. Funny… when I first met them I didn't give a damn and just wanted to get as far away as possible. It's funny how things change… so dramatically.
Anyway, it's almost 4 AM now so I should sleep. It's the last night D-tent spends together... and they're all sleeping like logs and snoring their heads off. Well, I can't blame them. I'm tired as well. I'm gonna see you before you get this letter, but I had fun writing it anyway. I've had fun writing to you this whole time. Actually, I've had fun ever since I met you; the little short girl with the long and complicated name, and a kick-butt attitude to match.
Heh. See you tomorrow.
Love, Squid.
A/N: And that's... THE END.
Wow. Ain't that dandy? Hehe. Thank goodness it's over... I love this story, but it was really starting to get on my nerves. (Hence, the lack of updates for the past few months.) This epilogue... I really like. :) I tried to finish it quickly so that it'll be ready to put up before school starts again, so if it seems a little rushed I'm sorry! I say that a lot to you guys... the word sorry, I mean. Hehe. I should stop giving myself a reason to apologise. I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really hope you like this chapter. Epilogue. Whatever. Please like it! I beg of you! Hehe. And if you don't... I'll keeeeel yer!
Just kidding. :)
But I do hope you'll like it.
And please review! Everyone who reviews this chapter will get a reply, as a way of showing my love for you guys! So if you've been reading this in secret and have not reviewed yet (as I always do) THEN COME OUTTA YOUR SHELL, DUDE, AND PRESS THAT SCHMEXY BUTTON DOWN THAT SAYS R-E-V-I-E-W! WHOO! (And a hint! Reviews that contain a nice, long, detailed message will receive longer replies because... well, it's common sense!) Hehe. I like long reviews. They make me smile. :)
While we're on the note of reviews, I BROKE FIVE-HUNDRED REVIEWS WHICH MAKES ME WELL UP IN TEARS OF JOY BECAUSE THAT IS ONE HECK OF A LOT OF REVIEWS.
Each and every one of you is special. :) Thank you... I dunno what to say, even. Thank you doesn't seem enough. I adore you all, and thank you so much for being there for me throughout this story, and always slipping me a positive comment and handy hints. :) (starts running around and hugging you all)
Wow... the chapter is alone is OVER 10,000 WORDS! HOLY MOLY! Okay, better not kill the uploading with a really long author's note! I'll see you all and talk to you all next chapter! Mucho love-lah, msq.