Letting go

by akiyume kye

Disclaimer: Until the day I become Takeshi Konomi, I will not own pot.

Pairings: TezuFuji

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Chapter 7: Trouble

Flashback

"Do you believe in love that lasts forever?" Fuji asked.

The buchou looked up, and hesitated for a moment.
"Yes."

The tensai chuckled. He was getting used to hearing these one word answers from Tezuka. "Saa… is it possible?"

"Why not?"

Fuji smiled. "What if it wasn't mutual? Will you still continue to love that person?"

"I will love only one person till the day I die."
Tezuka shifted in his chair. The topic was making him uncomfortable.

"Ahh. That's so sweet. I wonder who that lucky person is."

Tezuka stood up, took his books and pushed in his chair.
"Perhaps someone you already know too well."

End of Flashback

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Was I wrong?
Was I wrong to think that it was me?

Fuji couldn't move.

He could only continue to stare at the scene that lay before him.
A scene that he never expected he would see.

Tezuka… Was it all a lie?

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Slowly, he pulled away from Oishi.

It was wrong. This was all wrong.
How could he have done it?
What could have possessed him to.. to kiss Oishi?

He didn't even love the fukubuchou.
There was no future between them.
Only friendship, nothing else.

Tezuka knew that Oishi had feelings for him, but he couldn't bring himself to accept it.
His heart still belonged to Fuji, as much as he refused to admit it.

He looked up and saw the stunned expression on Fuji's face.
Tezuka's heart broke.

He couldn't bear to see Fuji suffer this way.

But reality struck him once again. There it was, the deep void in his heart.
Fuji had rejected him, hadn't he?

The painful memory was fresh in Tezuka's mind.

The way Fuji had screamed at him.
The way Fuji had pushed him away.

The way Fuji had destroyed their future.

Anger surged within the buchou.
I'll show you again, Fuji Syuusuke. I'll show you that I don't need you.
Ever.

With that, he leaned over to kiss Oishi again.
It came easier this time, but only because he had pictured himself holding the prodigy.

His arms wrapped possessively around Oishi, despite the knowledge of the eyes that were watching his every move.

The eyes… of a broken tensai.

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He couldn't bear to see it anymore.
No, he couldn't.

It was too painful.
Pain, that magnified the sorrow which had already engulfed his heart.
But he couldn't wallow in despair. He couldn't.

Fuji started running again.
He had to run, he had to escape from the myriad of emotions that would soon overcome.
He had to flee from this insanity. He had to push himself beyond his limits.

Running had gradually become a part of his life, one, that wouldn't leave him no matter how hard he tried.
Everything he feared, everything he disliked, he ran away from.

He had to, or he would lose to himself.
He had to, even if it meant losing his life.

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Oishi pushed Tezuka back.
He wanted more, more of Tezuka Kunimitsu, but it was… embarrassing.

He didn't want to be caught sharing a kiss with the buchou in public.

"Tezuka…" Oishi gulped. "Maybe we should stop…"

The look on Tezuka's face was hard to decipher.
There was a mixture of horror and alarm.

Oishi couldn't tell.

But before he could say anything else, the buchou ran off, an image of a distraught young man fleeing from the absurdity of his actions.

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He peered into the gents, but Tezuka wasn't there.

The club room, too, was empty.

Oishi scratched his head.
Where could he have gone?

He glanced at his watch and sighed.
It was time to dismiss them.

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He couldn't breathe.
It was excruciating. It was exhausting.

He felt his lungs caving in and his legs losing their strength.

Every ounce of energy in him had vanished.
He couldn't run anymore.

He needed a doctor.
He needed his medicine.
He needed to stop.

His vision was flickering, his pulse weakening.
Sweat was trickling down his forehead.

Why? He wanted to scream, but no audible sound came out from his dry pale lips.
His throat was parched and sore, his head throbbing in pain.

Why, Tezuka, why? Why must you do this to me?

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By the time Oishi found his way back to the courts, barely anyone was there.

Looking around, he found that the buchou had already returned to dismiss the tennis players.
Smiling to himself, he walked over to where the buchou was standing.

But he wasn't just standing there. He was lecturing the regulars.

"…go home now! He will finish the laps on his own!" Tezuka shouted at the group.
Having made his point clear, he turned away and headed for the club room.

Oishi was confused.
He looked over to Eiji and tried to catch his eye but the red head refused to look at him.

After several unsuccessful attempts, he finally gave up in frustration and approached Eiji.
"Eiji! What is going on? What's wrong?"

His worries were met with eyes full of hatred and grieve.

"What's wrong?" Eiji asked, his words laced thick with sarcasm.
"Nothing's wrong! Everything's fine! Everything's great! So why don't you go enjoy yourself with your boyfriend?"

Daggers shot out from Eiji's eyes, each piercing through the fukubuchou's heart.
What happened? Why is Eiji so mad at me?

Oishi frowned. He wanted to know why.
He reached out to grab Eiji, to hold him back, to ask him why, but the boy slipped out of his grasp and sped away.

"Go away!"

He was first shocked, then a torch was lit and anger flooded him.
Eiji had never acted this way.
He had lost his temper before, but never had he spoken to Oishi with such a harsh tone.

The anger in him was boiling, it was infuriating.
Oishi was on the verge of lambasting anyone in his path when something struck him.

Wait a minute.
Boyfriend?
What boyfriend?

No… it couldn't be.
Eiji couldn't have seen it.
No, not Eiji, no.

"He saw it."

Oishi spun around quickly and met the eyes of Tezuka.
His worst fears were confirmed.

Eiji…

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I hate him! I hate him!

Tears streaked his face.
Eiji was mad. Really mad.

Did Oishi think that he was stupid?
Did he think that he wouldn't have found out?

It was so open. A scene for everyone to see.
Did Oishi think they could hide it?

Dream on!

A fresh batch of tears streamed down his cheeks as he continued to sob on the cold floor.

You liar! You cheater!
I hate you!

He wiped the last tear off.
I hate you, Oishi, I hate you!

With that, he stormed out of the toilet.

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Tezuka picked up his bag and reached out for Oishi's.

Oishi only remained silent as Tezuka passed his bag to him.
He took his bag, and walked off, not waiting for the buchou.

He wasn't paying attention to anything, lost in his own thoughts, until he crashed into someone.

When he looked up, he saw Eiji sprawled on the ground, hand covering his arm where he had been cut in the fall.

"Eiji! Ah.. Gomen!"
Oishi bent down to help Eiji, but was rudely pushed away by the other.

"I don't need your help." He spat in disgust.

Oishi took a step back. Keen, poignant agony shot through him, and he wondered if the emptiness that he felt that instant would ever go away.

Momoshiro came by to help the red head up, looked at pair with animosity in his eyes, and walked off with Eiji.

"He should be fine. Let's go." Tezuka said, without much emotion.

Unsure of what to do, the raven haired boy nodded and acquiesced.

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Fuji fell.

But no one saw him.

He was hidden by the wall.
He was drained. He was exhausted. He was dying.

He couldn't breathe. He hadn't any energy to.
He needed his medicine, but he couldn't get up.

Am I going to die here?
Fuji let out a bitter laugh.
Maybethat would be better than living, he mused.

He propped himself up against the wall.
Maybe… maybe…

His eyes were closing. His pulse was fading.

His time was coming.

He was falling… deeper and deeper, right into the depths of the abyss.

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"Senpai…you sure you'll be fine? You don't look so good." Momoshiro called out to Eiji as he stepped out of the doorway.

Eiji tried his best reassure his kouhai with his normal grin, but instead, it came out as a sad smile. In his weak attempt to put up a deceptive front that meekly hid his emotions, he managed to say, "Daijoubu."

The second year prankster seemed unwilling to leave him alone, but gave him a wave, slammed the door and ran off to catch up with the other regulars.

Eiji stood up. He looked at the plaster that Momo had pasted untidily over his wound.

Tears sprang into his eyes yet again, glistening with agony and sorrow, as he ripped off the plaster and yelped in pain.
Oishi would have done a better job…

But he's a liar! I hate him!
I hate him!

Eiji bit his lip.
No, he shouldn't cry over people like him.

Staring unseeingly into the floor, he felt alone and strangely detached from his surroundings, abandoned by the one he sought refuge in, cast away by the person of his dreams.

He needed Fuji.
He needed to confide in his best friend.

It was only then, that Eiji realized he hadn't seen the tensai for quite some time.
He opened the door and called out, "Fuji! Are you still there?"

The wind was blowing gently. The sun was setting in the horizon.
The evening scene was tranquil and peaceful.

Eiji waited.

But there was no answer.

To be continued…
Please review! Hope you guys enjoyed it!

Next chapter: Will Eiji find Fuji before it is too late? What will happen, now that he knows the truth?