Okay, so, I originally started this as a joke when I was hanging out at General Featherduser's (megan) house with Gippal the Pimp (so, yeah-- Anne Marie) and I didn't intend to upload it, but we have decided that it is pretty freaking sweet and that we probably should. Oeace out- Captain Snippet... Heather
The Three Musketeers
Chapter 1
Sora rolled his eyes at the crappy joke his friend Kairi had just made and kept playing Final Fantasy X, which was a mostly retarded game because it had a shit turn-based battle system. Riku, who was the coolest of the three people there, politely informed Sora that he hated the characters in that "goddamned fucking game" because they were "goddamned fucking asshats." Especially that bitch, Brother, Riku mused. I hope he dies. The jerk. Attacking the party just before the FMV with Yuna in her hideous wedding dress. Sora was playing on Kairi's game, raving about how, "KAIRI YOUR CHARACTERS ARE SHIT! LIKE, SOOO BAD!"
Riku agreed very much.
Kairi wasn't listening because she had actually left the room. Riku narrowed his eyes as the controller vibrated on his leg. He didn't understand why it had to be set on vibrate.
Randomly, Sora said, "Your sister sooo digs me!"
Sora went on to say something else but Riku didn't hear because he was busy writing a story about three girls named Heather, Megan and Anne Marie, whom he basically put in the same situation as he was in. (He talked about Heather hating vibrating controllers and Anne Marie playing Final Fantasy X and this Megan chick being God knows where.) Then, Sora, seeing what Riku had written about hating vibrating controllers, touched the controller to Riku's hand, who ignored it. The phone rang and Sora went upstairs to get it because Kairi called down that it was for him.When Sora came back downstairs he told Riku that he should put in the story that Megan was making grilled cheese sandwiches because that was what Kairi was doing, and this Megan character basically was Kairi.
"My mom is bringing my toothbrush," Sora said blankly. (They'd basically been at Kairi's for two days straight, eating candy.)
"Probably a good idea," Riku replied.
Sora nodded and turned his attention back to the vibrating controller and giant tank he was supposed to be fighting. He cursed as each character was killed in one hit.
"AAHHH! Her characters suck SO BAD! YOU SUCK!" he shouted at the screen. "Seriously, though, Riku, you have no idea how bad Kairi's characters suck. Like, SOOO BAD! Like, almost as much as your sister freaking digs me!"
Riku was now faced with a problem. He couldn't really put that in his story because why would Anne Marie say that to Heather? Riku decided that these characters would have to be flexible in what they say, and wrote it down as Sora continued, "But that's really saying something, don't ya think?"
Then, after a short silence: "Man, have you ever noticed how Tidus' hair is freaking awesome?"
Sora had started a new game due to crappy characters dying.
"Listen to my story..." Tidus began to say on the screen.
"No!" Riku said. "I don't want to listen to your fucking story!"
"Hey! Leave the sexy beast alone!"
Riku was pretty sure Sora was joking on that one. It was much simpler for his Anne Marie character to say that than for Sora to. Riku wrote it down. Sora began to go on about how sweet something about the game was. Riku tried not to pay attention, though it became difficult because Sora suddenly began to sing loudly and off-key. Which was not entirely true, seeing as it wasn't really singing as much as going, "DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO!"
On the TV pretty music began to play. The way Riku saw it, the only really good thing about Final Fantasy was the pretty graphics and nice soundtrack. He stopped writing to watch the FMV that was playing. He really wished Sora would shut the fuck up. But it seemed that it would not be happening anytime soon.
It was pretty fucking sweet, he decided, how everyone was running for their lives and Auron was simply strolling along. Riku shut out Sora again because he was talking once more.
"I wonder if Vicki ever reads any of the files we write on this computer.." Sora said absent-mindedly, referring to Kairi's mom.
Kairi came downstairs. "Hey guys... Come get some lunch... What are you doing?"
"Playing a new intense round of Final Fantasy," Sora replied, "Because I couldn't do it on your game because your characters suck so fucking much."
Brief silence. Then:
"Fuck you."
Riku faithfully wrote this all down. Kairi said the soup would get cold and got up to leave. Riku wrote that down and then decided to go eat. He turned off the computer.