Bandit- Wow, this took forever to update. Sorry folks, but the flu sucks.

Zoro- (whistles) You're actually gracing the OP fandom with your presence. Joy.

Bandit- Yes well, I wanna know what happens between Usopp and Sanji.

Usopp- Wait… don't you already know?

Bandit- …………

Usopp- (face palm) Never mind.

Disclaimer- If writing the disclaimer makes me depressed, we all know the answer.

(A/N) Are Luffy and Zoro gonna fight? Will Sanji stop being a royal ass and apologize? I have no idea, the people in my head never tell me anything! ;p

The broken dishes from earlier were now swept up and in a trash can, ready to be taken out. The floor shined like brand new, not a bit of glass or dirt to tarnish the picture. Any proof that Sanji had tried kicking Usopp's face off two hours before had disappeared, and the blonde grinned slightly. If the Baratie was anything, it was cleaner than most people's butt crack.

"Do you mind letting me go now?" Usopp asked rather tiredly. He trailed behind Sanji, his forearm still held tightly in the chef's grasp, as if waiting for the younger man to make a run for it. "Even if I did run, you'd catch me."

"Not unless you were really scared," Sanji countered. "Your feet fly in a true moment of fear. I'm molasses in comparison."

As Sanji hoped, the compliment put a small smile on Usopp's face. 'Okay, his mood's better.' He had a few good seconds in Usopp's favor to explain himself, and hopefully end this poor excuse for an argument. "Usopp, before you go off the deep-end again, will you at least let me ask you one question?" Sanji winced inwardly, hoping his natural sarcasm wouldn't ruin this.

The smile flew off his friend's face to be replaced by a passive gaze. "You just asked me one, but be my guest. Ask away."

The need to say "smart-ass" gnawed on his tongue, but Sanji suppressed it. "Why are you so angry at me?" he asked instead. There. A nice, safe question that Usopp couldn't possibly get pissed about.

'What kind of question is that?' That didn't even merit an answer in the teen's mind. Usopp sighed and experimentally pulled on his trapped arm still in Sanji's grasp, just in case. When that didn't work, he decided he might as well answer the stupid question. "Because you don't care."

Sanji went on the defense. "Who ever said that? It's two weeks worth, Usopp! If it upsets you that much, I'll just go talk to Z--"

"And THAT!" Usopp snapped, stopping Sanji's rant. "Unless it involves scores of women or it's actually life threatening, your empathy level is at negative infinity!"

"I'll have you know I have plenty of empathy! You're just a unforgiving bastard!" Warning signs popped up in his head, startlingly similar to the ones that appeared when he was about to lose the favor of a lovely lady. But this wasn't a lady; this was Usopp.

Sanji told his caution radar to piss off. "I'm trying to be nice about this and you keep acting like I killed your dog!"

Usopp's face turned red in anger, and he pulled more fiercely to free his arm. "Sorry you don't have to pay for school AND an apartment like I do! You've got Zoro to help with finances, whereas I have no one! Money is hard to come by for me, Sanji!"

All the crossness in the blonde grounded to a halt. "When did you start going to school?" Usopp had dropped out, like in tenth grade. He didn't go to school.

The rage filtered across Usopp's face before turning into tired expectancy. "I got to the University of Arts, retard. For drawing…"

Sanji had the nerve to pout. "You never told me this. When did you start going, and how the hell did you get accepted?"

The boy's face turned vengeful again, and Sanji hurried to correct his sentence. "Not that you're not good, but that's where all the snobs go, Usopp. Unless you have connections, I never thought you'd get in."

"Yes, well a few of us get in there on talent alone. Shocking, isn't it?" From Usopp's tone, he was no closer to forgiving Sanji than from the beginning of the conversation.

"Why didn't you tell me, though? I would've at least congratulated you or treated you to dinner." He wasn't completely heartless. It stung knowing Usopp didn't care to tell him something this important. "You getting into some uptight university doesn't happen very often."

Usopp sighed and wretched his arm from Sanji. "I did tell you."

"… You did?" Like hell. Usopp never once mentioned even applying there.

"Remember Rebecca?" Usopp asked without looking at him while massaging his arm.

The random question caused Sanji to look at him oddly. "Yeah… tall, red hair, pale complexion, a sweetheart. She used to work here. I dated her for a month until she decided I wasn't her type." Sanji sighed forlornly, the old memories opening an old wound. That had been one beautiful woman, and so nice… "Why?"

"Remember when you and her first met?"

What was with all the weird questions? "This has nothing to do with y--"

"Just answer it, asshole."

Sanji growled something relatively unpleasant but did as told. "You and I went to some party for the Baratie. I saw her there, started talking to her, we hit it off nicely. Usopp, you already know this."

Usopp nodded and smiled tightly. "Now, do you remember what you and I were talking about before you started promising to sell your soul for her happiness?"

He didn't remember, and the realization made him squirm in guilt. "You told me then?"

Shit.

"Yep." The long nosed teen shrugged unfeelingly. He didn't meet Sanji's eyes.

Neither of them said anything for a good long while.

"Shit." Zoro crashed into the front seat with a sigh, completely worn out. "Two fights in one day." And he still had one left to go.

Luffy turned to grin at him. "Wow, you really beat the shit out of him." And without swords, too. Luffy couldn't describe the pride he felt for his sensei right then, so he didn't try. Grinning was good enough.

Zoro nodded in relaxed agreement. Kabaji wouldn't be able to walk without a limp for days… 'and he probably should consider plastic surgery.' The swordsman snickered softly at the thought.

"Na? What's so funny?"

Zoro shook his head and sat up in the seat. "Nothing. Let's get back to the dojo. I'm sure you want to fight me, right?" 'Say no, please.' Screw his pride. Zoro wanted as shower and a nap.

"I can't wait! If you can beat someone when they have weapons and you don't, you must be hard to beat." Luffy nodded happily to himself, the thought of a hard battle making him brim with excitement. "I'll have to try hard to beat you."

In response, Zoro just smiled and sighed. Of course Luffy would still want to fight him. The swordsman was fast finding out what held top priority in the boy's mind. Fighting was definitely in the top three. Food had a landslide victory.

The engine turned over and roared to life. "Okay, let's leave."

"Hey Zoro?" The swordsman grunted to let Luffy know he'd heard. "What about your wounds?" The boy poked at the red stain from Kabaji's diving stab, his eyebrows dipping in worry. "Doesn't that hurt?"

"If you keep poking it, then yes." Zoro pulled off from the side of the road and headed down the street, all the while swatting Luffy's roaming hand away from his injuries. "Luffy, stop that!"

"But if you're hurt, you won't fight at your best," Luffy stated bluntly. "We can't fight yet. You have to get better."

That odd warmth hit Zoro's stomach again; it wasn't his fault having someone worry about him was a rare occurrence. "Luffy, I'm fine. I can barely feel it."

"Then why did you want me to stop poking it?"

Zoro sputtered something intelligent. "Luffy, just drop it!"

The boy didn't want to let the subject drop, but figured risking Zoro's anger wasn't worth it. So he settled into the passenger's seat, every once in a while casting a glance at the bloody wounds while chewing on his lip.

Every stare from Luffy made Zoro more aware of how many cuts and scrapes he actually had, and he found hard not to squirm in his seat. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate Luffy's worry; the swordsman, for some reason or another, found himself holding the boy's opinion in high-esteem. If Luffy was this worried about some shallow wounds, did that mean he still thought Zoro too weak to battle? 'And why do I care anyway?' Roronoa Zoro never gave a shit what people thought. No reason to start now.

"I'll fight you tomorrow."

Zoro turned his head slightly so Luffy was in his line of vision. The straw hat was pulled over his face, covering his expression from Zoro's questioning gaze.

"What? Luffy, if its about my in--"

"I'm tired. I'm going to sleep." With that, Luffy turned so his back faced his companion. Seconds later, snores emitted from the still form.

Only knowing he could crash if he didn't keep his eyes on the road kept Zoro from staring at the sleeping teen. 'Did he really fall asleep?' Unable to fathom it, he reached over and cautiously poked the boy on the neck. All he got for his troubles was a rather loud, bellowing snore. 'He really fell asleep…'

"Well… that was weird," Zoro said awkwardly to the passing air and kept driving. If Luffy insisted on a fight tomorrow, he'd get one. "Heh. Strange kid." Zoro shook his head and smirked. His day couldn't get any weirder.

Usopp scrubbed the tables while in one of the worst moods ever. Today, he decided, had come directly from hell, most likely the devil's way of saying, "I haven't forgotten about you, Usopp. Surprise!"

When Sanji had refused to say anything else, Usopp had fled like a cornered rabbit and left him standing for the third time that day. He was getting good as leaving Sanji writhing in guilt. That, unfortunately, never made him feel any better. Feeding off someone else's guilt wasn't his thing.

And to make things significantly worse, the entire Baratie knew he and Sanji weren't on good terms. Most of the waitresses twittered gossip and gave him sympathetic glances whenever possible, the last thing Usopp wanted at the moment. The Brave Usopp didn't need or want their fuckin' sympathy, thank you very much. He could deal with Sanji on his own.

'I'm just gonna drop it.' He'd reached his decision five minutes after fleeing from Sanji. The blonde had made one mistake, big deal. The next time he saw Sanji, he'd yell at him for being a lazy ass as usual, hopefully breaking the stalemate. Then life could get back to normal and he could worry about how he'd pay for college and his apartment. His landlord was one mean bitch.

"I'm sure I can keep her off my back for another month, but what about college?" he muttered to himself. This seriously sucked. Pure luck had gotten him into the University of Arts; only the best of the best got in, or those who had money coming out of their ass. Usopp was relatively sure they wouldn't mind booting him out if he didn't pay fast. "Damn you to hell, Sanji," he seethed, and stopped scrubbing before he tried breaking the table in half. He would hold this mistake over the blonde's head for a very long time.

The long-nosed man looked up for more tables to clean and spotted a couple getting ready to leave. "Might as well keep working…" Thinking about blonde-haired cooks caused much stress that needed to be released.

"Hey, Usopp."

'Well speak of the devil.' "You seem to love interrupting me from work." Usopp tried keeping his voice light, but it came out strained. Keeping his back to the man wasn't helping either. They needed to get this over with. "Sanji, look. I--"

Usopp let out an undignified screech when Sanji calmly kicked him in the back, surprisingly gentle so it didn't really hurt. "That's what you get for making me feel so damn guilty," he deadpanned.

The long-nosed teen whirled and got ready to deck him one. "You as--" Once again, Sanji effectively cut Usopp off by leaning in close…

And thrusting an envelope in Usopp's hands.

It took a while before Usopp could get his brain to work. But when his mind woke up from its shock, his knees started to quake and he began to sweat like a stuffed pig.

"Would you back up!" he shouted, pushing Sanji away from him. "And what is this?"

Sanji watched him with a impassive eye, the smoke from his cigarette curling toward the ceiling. "Money saved up from all my paychecks. Just thought you could put it to better use than I could." As soon as he said that, Sanji looked away, oddly nervous. "It should be enough to pay for this month's rent and everything…"

"Wait… You're giving it to me?" Usopp asked dumbly.

Sanji's eye snapped back to him in mild annoyance. "Why else would I let you see it?"

Still wary of an alternative motive, Usopp cautiously peeked inside the envelope, half-expecting it to be empty. Instead he found quite a sum of money settled inside, more than enough to cover him financially. 'Holy shit, how much does Zeff pay him?' With this, he could easily get by the next two weeks with minimal problems.

Now Sanji was the one wanting to sweat. This was hard enough with Usopp standing there quietly. "Well?" he demanded. "Is that enough, or do you need more?" True, he hadn't said the magic words but this qualified, right?

His answer was a nasty glare, and Sanji's eyebrows shot up. What did he do now?

Usopp crossed the small distance to his friend and shoved the envelope back to Sanji. "I can't take that! I, the Great Usopp, do not need charity!"

Sanji growled in frustration and shoved the money back. "Well, the Great Usopp is gonna take it anyway!"

"I don't want it!" Shove.

"Too fuckin' bad!" Shove back.

"I won't take it!" Push.

"Damn you, long nose! Take the shitty money!" Hard thrust.

"Okay."

The blonde got ready for another rant when Usopp stopped him short with a wide smile. "Huh?"

"I said okay." He brushed off Sanji's hold on the envelope and took the money. "If it upsets you that much, fine." The teen peered into the folded paper once more, that smile still firm on his face. "Can't believe you're willing to give me over three thousand dollars, but who am I to complain?"

It took a moment for Sanji to understand Usopp's one-eighty attitude. But when he did his face turned pale, the cigarette teetering on his bottom lip. "More than th--! Give me that!" He lunged just as Usopp danced out of the way.

"Nope! Too late!" Usopp chirped over his shoulder, making a mad dash for anywhere other than Sanji. "It's mine now!"

"Usopp!" He hadn't meant to give him that much money! "Wait a minute!"

The curly haired boy stopped and turned around, beaming brightly. "Hey, I thought this was your apology? You want it back now?" He schooled his face the best he could and threw the package at Sanji's halting body. "Here, take it back! Some friend you are!"

Sanji caught it neatly and glared. "I can't afford to give you that much! How else am I supposed to pay for myself and the cabbage head!" He took a look into the envelope, and hoped his face wasn't burning. Why was Usopp the only man that could make him feel--…

"… ! You little…"

Usopp was already gone, his laughter causing a great deal of customers to stare at his running form. He ran right out the restaurant; outside would be the safest place from Sanji at that particular moment.

All the while Sanji could do nothing more than stare into the envelope, only a thousand dollars inside. "He got me…" A gurgle of a chuckle escaped, and Sanji bit his lip to keep from erupting from amusement. Leave it to Usopp to effectively ruin his apology and still forgive him.

He'd find the liar later. And next time he'd make sure Usopp kept the money.

"Luffy… Luffy!" Zoro lightly shook the still sleeping form, a tinge of annoyance in his voice. "We're here."

"Na… foooooood…" A dribble of drool hung out of Luffy's mouth. "Huuuuunnnnnngggrrrrryyyyyy…"

Zoro frowned. "You already ate three times your weight in food… Luffy!" Now he hit the boy on the side of the head and watched, amused, Luffy spring up with a dazed look in his wide brown eyes.

"Huh? Ace, is it breakfast already?"

"No, we're back at the dojo. It's a little past one in the afternoon." The sun was set high in the sky, and Zoro waited impatiently for Luffy to shake the sleep out of his brain. The swordsman didn't need a sunburn right then. "Hurry up."

"Alright, we made it back!" Luffy jumped out the car and bounded toward the building. "Let's go Zoro! I still have to learn how to use a sword!"

The idea of letting Luffy near a sword again, even a wooden one, made the elder of the two cringe. "You can't learn how to use a sword in a day… You can't learn how to use a sword period." he sighed, more to himself than Luffy. It wasn't like the boy was actually listening. "And I thought we were gonna fight."

Luffy heard that. "No, tomorrow," he called over his shoulder, and paused to wait for Zoro. "I don't want to fight today."

The swordsman could tell his new friend wouldn't budge. And something told him Luffy was right this time; another fight would knock him out cold. "So I can rest up and fight better tomorrow, right?" he asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yep." Luffy grinned. "You should save up your strength. I'm hard to beat." There was no boastful tone in the young man's voice, only the simple truth.

"Well, I suggest you do the same," Zoro countered, his grin matching Luffy's. "I'm not an easy opponent, but you know that now." Of course, Luffy was by no means easy to fight either. His impressive show of strength had impressed even Sanji.

Luffy laughed and rested his hands on his straw hat. "True, you're pretty strong… but I still think I can beat you!"

Lightly placing a punch on the boy's arm, Zoro laughed with him. "I guess we'll just have to see then, won't we?"

"Yeah, we will." Luffy punched him back none too gently, instinctively knowing Zoro could take it. "Come on, Zoro. Let's get back to class." Tugging insistently, the enthusiastic teen pulled his teacher into the dojo and to the others.

"Wait, Luffy! You should probably call me sensei…" The idea didn't sit well with Zoro, but he didn't need other students thinking he was favoring the boy. "Just while we're in class," he added hastily.

If Luffy minded, it didn't show on his smiling face. "Okay, Zoro-sensei!"

'It doesn't sound right coming from him…' Zoro didn't like the added title from Luffy's mouth; in his mind they were already equals, no matter who was teaching who. He was about to say, "To hell with everyone else," but they'd finally reached the inner classroom with Joni instructing some of the younger students. Their rather loud entrance caused everyone to look at them, and the reaction was identical. Almost all the students took one look at Luffy and fled to the corners of the room, being careful to keep a watch out for flying swords now. Only Joni jogged over to greet them.

"Luffy-kun! Zoro-an-- What the hell happened to you!"

"Neh?" Zoro gave Joni's flabbergasted look a confused one before remembering his previous fights. "The shitty cook's PMSing and I ran into Kabaji," he said as if that explained everything.

Joni gave his friend a sympathetic glance, offering to run for the first-aid kit. "Those look like they hurt," he grimaced, and made a show of inspecting the wounds closely. "And this… what the…"

"Oh, that. Kabaji ran me through." Joni visibly paled. "Hey, it only hit meat, not bo--"

Luffy's interest immediately perked. "Meat? Where?"

"No Luffy," Zoro scowled. "No meat." The boy pouted and once again tuned them out. "Like I said, it only hit meat and it doesn't hurt. Don't worry about it, Joni."

"That's what you said last time, before you fainted from blood loss! We had to run you to the hospital!" Joni shouted in vexation.

Luffy picked up the words "Zoro" and "fainting" and broke out into peals of laughter. "Zoro fainted! AHAHAHAHAHA!" He pointed at the swordsman while clutching his stomach. "I can't believe you fainted!"

"I did not faint!" Zoro shouted, blushing wildly and trying to protect his honor. "I fell asleep, damn it!" Instead of stopping, Luffy laughed harder.

"No you didn't! Sanji-aniki was shouting over the phone that you'd fallen face first into the mashed potatoes during dinner, and you wouldn't wake up no matter how many times he kicked you!"

Zoro's face resembled a ripe tomato by now. "Would you kindly shut up, Joni!" Luffy continued to howl. "It's not funny Luffy!"

"Yeah it is!" But Luffy did calm down, after a bit more aggressive prompting from Zoro. "Why did you faint, Zoro-sensei?" he finally asked. The wound must've been serious in order to bring Zoro down.

"Well…" The green haired man furrowed his forehead in thought. Honestly, he couldn't remember. Chances were he'd battled with Sanji for use of the car. "I don't know. It doesn't really matter now."

"Probably got into a fight with Sanji," Luffy chuckled, voicing Zoro's thoughts without knowing. "I think he's the only one who can hurt you that bad… besides me."

The last part made Zoro shake his head in amusement. "Confident, aren't you?"

"Yep."

Joni stared at Luffy like he was loose a few screws. "You can't beat Zoro-aniki. Have you seen him fight?"

"Yes," Luffy said steadily. "He's really powerful, even though I never seen him fight with his swords yet." He broke out into a smile. "But I get to see tomorrow. I get to fight him!"

Zoro's friend looked ready to go comatose. "WHAT!" The very thought was inconceivable. Zoro didn't fight with his students unless they were asking for an ass whoopin', and even then he rarely fought back; he let them screw up with their own incompetent mistakes.

"It's fine, Joni. Luffy's stronger than he looks, believe me." His eyes sought out Luffy's seemingly innocent ones. "I'm sure he'll do fine." A brief but overwhelming feeling of connection washed over them both, an agreement between fighters. Neither would be holding back when tomorrow came, and Zoro was startled to realize he trusted Luffy to fight to his full potential. He didn't want his student fighting at half power; after all they'd been through today, Zoro expected Luffy to give his all.

Joni watched this all in disbelief, but he recognized that look in Zoro's eye; the one he only wore when getting ready to fight someone of his skill level. If Zoro was this excited about a fight, especially after fighting Kabiji… The kid better be as good as both of them hoped.

"Just don't hurt the kid too bad," Joni advised, walking away to get bandages for Zoro. "We can't have anymore law suits or this place will go under."

Zoro only snorted in response. "Alright Luffy." The moment of connection passed, and the teacher led the student toward some wooden swords away from everyone else. "Let's see if we can get you to hold a sword properly this time…"

"I will! And I get to hear that cool whistling noise again!" Luffy exclaimed. Zoro opened his mouth, then closed it with a snap. 'Why bother?' It was doubtful the teen would listen anyway, and Zoro was too tired to reprimand him.

"Yes, you'll hear the whistling noise," he sighed. "Just try not to hit anyone…" Luffy's cheerful grin only reminded Zoro he still had half a day to spend with this nut. If he'd known his day would go like this, he never would've gotten out of bed.

Luffy swooped up a sword and slashed it through the air with eagerness. "Look Zoro-sensei! I'm a samurai!"

Zoro felt a smile creep on his face while he continued to watch Luffy vigorously attack his invisible opponent. Well, maybe today wasn't as bad as he'd thought…. He might actually have to thank Sanji for dragging his ass out of bed. Maybe.

Finally, an update! I know it took forever, and I'll try being quicker next time. Just that writing in two fandoms requires patience… especially when my muses all assault me at the same time. :p

Dichana- XD I should give you a medal, because it's your email that finally made me update. :p And I hope you enjoy the San/Uso bit. I found it quite cute. (loves the pairing) Oh, and I have a new friend at LJ! Yeah! (is excited) I shall add you, too! (hugs you) Thanks much for the review and ending my lazy streak!

DigitalDreamer- Wow, I'm having a celebrity review my story. XD Kidding, but I'm really glad I got a review from you, especially with all your kick-ass ZoLu stories. And the bit with Kabaji kinda snuck in, to tell ya the truth. At first I just had some normal policeman, but then I gave him a sword and he turned into Kabaji. :p My mind is weird. Thanks so much for the review!

Macabre Love- Yeah, this story seems to grow longer and longer… Gah, now who sounds perverted. XD Aww… thanks! I'm glad you like my writing style! I keep thinking I write too much, but it seems to make people happy! And yeah, we have another SanUso lover! The popularity of the pairing just keeps growing. :p Thanks for the review!

Kirby-Chan263- Glad you faved it! And I feel Sanji is too mean, so I'll have to work on that. Also feel Usopp's sometimes a bit off, but meh. Sooner or later I'll get the hang of it… right? XD

Polw- (shudders) I could never make Usopp into a whining girl. That's equivalent to character murder in my opinion. Glad you like the character development, and I'll try updating sooner. Thanks for the review!

Shadow wolf- (eyes the Zoro plushie) Oh don't worry, Zoro's just fine! He'll be sore in the morning though. XD (grabs plushie) PLUSHIE BANDIT STRIKES! (trips) Oww….

Spooky-Chan- Aw, I'm glad I made your Halloween that much better. I love making people happy! (hits you) And where are your updates, girl? Though I shouldn't be talking when it comes to updating…. (coughs) Neh, update when you can! (huggles you)

De Ladyu- Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as the others! XD Thanks for the review!

AlibisDragon- (gets hit in head with candy) OW! You almost poked my eye out! XD

Oh, but you are, without a doubt, one of my fave reviewers! Your reviews are so mammothy! (hugs) But anyway, sorry it took so long to update, but hey! Here's a chapter to appease you! And I think you're right about the uncertainty between Usopp and Sanji. I've also noticed you approached It's the Onions (which kicks ass, by the way) with Sanji already having his feelings figured out and Usopp left in the dark, while I took the opposite trail and had Usopp in love with Sanji. I don't know why, but it's interesting seeing it from that point of view. XD Makes me love the story more.

And I totally understand the "plot bunny" problem. I have this one SanUso story gnawing at my brain, but I'm reluctant to write it. I'm not sure of the reaction it would get, so for now it stays locked away in my head with all the other strange bunnies. And the drabble bunnies are starting to multiply… Bah, so many ideas…. XD Thanks much for the review! (superglomps you)

Griever5- Kabaji and Zoro fighting is love! That was my favorite part, so I'm glad you liked it too! XD Thanks for the review!

Wow… this chapter gets the record for most reviews! Keep 'em comin' folks! More reviews means faster updates… hopefully. XD REVIEW!